ginapeterb
29th August 2004, 14:25
Before you think about a visa...it may make some sense to give consideration to the venue of your wedding...is it better to have the wedding in the Philippines or is it more practical to hold in the UK.
Firstly, every couple will be different..their may be reasons why a UK venue may be appropriate...some couples prefer that..as they do not want to go through the Philippine paperwork trail..with its multiple copies of this and multiple copies of that.
If thats how you feel thats ok...but I think a few questions might help to give you some pointers in what to think about before pronoucing the venue of your wedding..as this will undoubtedly be a deciding factor in which visa you intend to apply for.
Questions that come to mind are :
1. Cost
2. Family Considerations ie: UK Family ? Philippine Family ?
3. Cultural needs.
I have split the areas down into the three major areas of interest firstly lets discuss:_
Cost !!!!!
By their very nature...Filipino weddings are a major social occasions as indeed they are in the UK...but whilst they tend to be cyncial affairs for the guests in this counry...in the Philippines Weddings are a major day out...and a Filiipino wedding can be a big affair...especially the number of guests that can be around on the day...it is nothing for hundreds of relatives to be at a wedding..unlike most UK Register office weddings where you are lucky if 10 people turn up.
Actually its not quite as bad as that...but you do get the picture..cost is very important consideration...however having said that...it is cheaper by far to marry having a big wedding in the Philippines than it is to have a big wedding in the UK
For Example you could most probably have a great wedding in the Philippines for 100,000 Pesos, just under a Grand and have the following paid for (Based on a None Church wedding)
Judges Fees
Reception Accomodation
Food and Decorations
Brides Dress and accessories
Grooms Outfit
Bridesmaids dresses if any
Cake
Photography and Wedding Album
Invitaitions
Hotel Accomodation
License Fees and other costs
Rings etc..may cost a little more...but the saving on having a good quality Gold or White Gold Wedding Band is well worth having your wedding in the Philippines in the first place.
Cost of a Good quliaty diamond engagement ring is much better in the Phlippines than it is in UK...bear that in mind when thinking whether to have your wedding in the Phils or the UK.
Family Considerations:
This is often an area of conflict...you have to give this matter serious consideration because if you choose to have your wedding in the UK..and opt for a fiancee visa that is fine...but your fiancee's family will most likely not be able to attend your wedding for two reasons.
1. Cost..they will mot unlikely be able to fly to UK for a UK Wedding, then you have the cost of accomodating them, and in any event the costs alone would be prohibitive especially if it is you who is expected to finance this.
2. Tourist Visa - I would say..although I may be proved wrong that Filipinos who want to attend your UK Wedding will not be given a tourist visa to enter UK for this purpose so I would say thats a non starter if you are thinking along those lines.
It is almost guaranteed although not always as otherrs have shown that a Filipina will wish to marry in her home city, that is of course in front of her family and freinds, she will want her Nanay and Tatay to see her get married, even though she knows she will have to leave the Philippines at some stage to start a new life in a foreign country.
That is a cultural need for her and her family..it is something that if her parents and family do not see, may even cause you problems in the agreement that she should marry you, whilst she might be over 18 years of age and does not need her family's consent to marriage, it is unlikely she will consent to a marriage if her parents do not approve of you, getting her parents on side..and batting in your team is a must, go to Cultural section of this forum for further insights into this.
So Family is vey important...if you ignore her famly and shut them out..or make a comment such as "Its for me and her to decide" you do so at yor peril.
Cultural Needs:
This area is often missed by Western Guys..simply because in our own interests we all tend to be Ego Centric (ability to believe that the world revolves around our own needs)
Ego Centrism causes us to think that our culture is the only one and that "She will assimilate into english culture" this is a classic mistake...that is why Americans are often resented because of their Americanisation of other cultures.
A Filipina has a cultural need to fulfill just like you have, by consenting to a wedding in the Philipines you consent to take her culture seriously..remembering that in some respects Philippine culture especially old Filipino culture is nothing like you have ever seen before.
Having a Filipino wedding is important to her, lets face it a Brit wedding isnt much to shout about anyway...so maybe for you it will be something to remember, if you want a quite affair and would prefer to be in UK...thats fine..and if she consents to it and is happy to leave her country on a fiancee visa that is fine too...I am merely trying to give you somethings to consider before you come to this decision.
Cultural needs..that is for her to marry as a Filiipino is very important...maybe seeing you wearing a Barong Tagalog is important for her too, best of luck...whatever you decde
You will need to go now to the section on "How to obtain a visa for your Spouse/fiancee for UK"
Best of luck.
Pete
Firstly, every couple will be different..their may be reasons why a UK venue may be appropriate...some couples prefer that..as they do not want to go through the Philippine paperwork trail..with its multiple copies of this and multiple copies of that.
If thats how you feel thats ok...but I think a few questions might help to give you some pointers in what to think about before pronoucing the venue of your wedding..as this will undoubtedly be a deciding factor in which visa you intend to apply for.
Questions that come to mind are :
1. Cost
2. Family Considerations ie: UK Family ? Philippine Family ?
3. Cultural needs.
I have split the areas down into the three major areas of interest firstly lets discuss:_
Cost !!!!!
By their very nature...Filipino weddings are a major social occasions as indeed they are in the UK...but whilst they tend to be cyncial affairs for the guests in this counry...in the Philippines Weddings are a major day out...and a Filiipino wedding can be a big affair...especially the number of guests that can be around on the day...it is nothing for hundreds of relatives to be at a wedding..unlike most UK Register office weddings where you are lucky if 10 people turn up.
Actually its not quite as bad as that...but you do get the picture..cost is very important consideration...however having said that...it is cheaper by far to marry having a big wedding in the Philippines than it is to have a big wedding in the UK
For Example you could most probably have a great wedding in the Philippines for 100,000 Pesos, just under a Grand and have the following paid for (Based on a None Church wedding)
Judges Fees
Reception Accomodation
Food and Decorations
Brides Dress and accessories
Grooms Outfit
Bridesmaids dresses if any
Cake
Photography and Wedding Album
Invitaitions
Hotel Accomodation
License Fees and other costs
Rings etc..may cost a little more...but the saving on having a good quality Gold or White Gold Wedding Band is well worth having your wedding in the Philippines in the first place.
Cost of a Good quliaty diamond engagement ring is much better in the Phlippines than it is in UK...bear that in mind when thinking whether to have your wedding in the Phils or the UK.
Family Considerations:
This is often an area of conflict...you have to give this matter serious consideration because if you choose to have your wedding in the UK..and opt for a fiancee visa that is fine...but your fiancee's family will most likely not be able to attend your wedding for two reasons.
1. Cost..they will mot unlikely be able to fly to UK for a UK Wedding, then you have the cost of accomodating them, and in any event the costs alone would be prohibitive especially if it is you who is expected to finance this.
2. Tourist Visa - I would say..although I may be proved wrong that Filipinos who want to attend your UK Wedding will not be given a tourist visa to enter UK for this purpose so I would say thats a non starter if you are thinking along those lines.
It is almost guaranteed although not always as otherrs have shown that a Filipina will wish to marry in her home city, that is of course in front of her family and freinds, she will want her Nanay and Tatay to see her get married, even though she knows she will have to leave the Philippines at some stage to start a new life in a foreign country.
That is a cultural need for her and her family..it is something that if her parents and family do not see, may even cause you problems in the agreement that she should marry you, whilst she might be over 18 years of age and does not need her family's consent to marriage, it is unlikely she will consent to a marriage if her parents do not approve of you, getting her parents on side..and batting in your team is a must, go to Cultural section of this forum for further insights into this.
So Family is vey important...if you ignore her famly and shut them out..or make a comment such as "Its for me and her to decide" you do so at yor peril.
Cultural Needs:
This area is often missed by Western Guys..simply because in our own interests we all tend to be Ego Centric (ability to believe that the world revolves around our own needs)
Ego Centrism causes us to think that our culture is the only one and that "She will assimilate into english culture" this is a classic mistake...that is why Americans are often resented because of their Americanisation of other cultures.
A Filipina has a cultural need to fulfill just like you have, by consenting to a wedding in the Philipines you consent to take her culture seriously..remembering that in some respects Philippine culture especially old Filipino culture is nothing like you have ever seen before.
Having a Filipino wedding is important to her, lets face it a Brit wedding isnt much to shout about anyway...so maybe for you it will be something to remember, if you want a quite affair and would prefer to be in UK...thats fine..and if she consents to it and is happy to leave her country on a fiancee visa that is fine too...I am merely trying to give you somethings to consider before you come to this decision.
Cultural needs..that is for her to marry as a Filiipino is very important...maybe seeing you wearing a Barong Tagalog is important for her too, best of luck...whatever you decde
You will need to go now to the section on "How to obtain a visa for your Spouse/fiancee for UK"
Best of luck.
Pete