View Full Version : Staying abroad
telford
25th September 2008, 22:19
I am not sure of how many of you here in this forum that stay here in UK with your personal choice.
Personally, I am one of the few who stay here because I need to,not my personal choice. I am here for the second time coz I know that it is good for my baby,financially I mean.
The first time I was here, I know this is not the place for me,so I decide to go back to my native land.But now that I already have a baby,I already have no choice,but to go back here and find a greener pasture.But I know,deep inside me,I cant stay here for long,my heart and soul still belongs in Philippines. And I will still try to do my best to return in my native land as soon as I can.I maybe spoiled and stubborn or maybe lazy,but I miss being serve by our helper.I miss ate Eva who do everything for me since I was a school girl. Too bad I cant be able to bring here for now,but I will try my best very soon:)
That's all! thanks for reading...I am just bored and miss my life in the Philippines.
maria_and_matt
25th September 2008, 23:03
it is true that our life back home is nothing compared to what we have here. like you i am here coz of my son and hubby, i just like to think that even without money they will be taken care of when they get sick, back home money is always a worry when our love ones gets ill. we just go back to the philippines once a year for 4 weeks, that way i get to have a taste of our way of life.
i think that marrying a brit has somewhat limited my choice to be where i want to live. i have a husband now and a son to consider, i am happy where they are :).
cruisingkerry
25th September 2008, 23:12
It must be really difficult for you Grace, changing your whole life for the man and baby that you love.
But I applaude all the filipinas who do this, for me its going to be the other way around, Bert will come here. He works on ships at the minut so he's used to being away from the Phils but I hope he is able to settle into life here.
I think it must be more difficult for people from the Phils to leave their country than us Brits, you all have sucha strong sense of family, I was amazed at how close Berts family were! But then again I have the most disjointed family in the world!
Anyway, keep your chin up!
Love
Kxx
Geraldine
26th September 2008, 12:00
Hi!
Same here, our kids got a better future here IMO. But I miss my family, barkadas, relatives, the food, the beaches, the hustle and bustle of Manila. How I wish my whole family is here with us.
I feel sorry for my kids, they are growing up without knowing any relatives from my side and from my husband;s side as well. His Mum died when he was young, his Dad lives in Phuket, his only sister is miles away. They got no grandparents, no cousins, nothing! :cwm34: Its a good thing I know a few Pinoy families here, we look after each other and treat each one as part of the family.
But in the Philippines, everybody in your barangay is like one big family...you call them ate/kuya, lola/lola, tito/tita....no place like home.
PeterB
26th September 2008, 13:09
I think it must be more difficult for people from the Phils to leave their country than us Brits, you all have sucha strong sense of family ...
Just one of the reasons why I chose to come and live here.
telford
26th September 2008, 16:09
Hi!
Same here, our kids got a better future here IMO. But I miss my family, barkadas, relatives, the food, the beaches, the hustle and bustle of Manila. How I wish my whole family is here with us.
I feel sorry for my kids, they are growing up without knowing any relatives from my side and from my husband;s side as well. His Mum died when he was young, his Dad lives in Phuket, his only sister is miles away. They got no grandparents, no cousins, nothing! :cwm34: Its a good thing I know a few Pinoy families here, we look after each other and treat each one as part of the family.
But in the Philippines, everybody in your barangay is like one big family...you call them ate/kuya, lola/lola, tito/tita....no place like home.
Yeah,you're right Geraldine,back in Philippines, we have lots of families and friends,but here sooo limited. My hubby was surprised when he attend our family reunion and he found out that 60% of the population in our City is my relatives in my dads side and 20% are relatives of my mums side
telford
26th September 2008, 16:13
It must be really difficult for you Grace, changing your whole life for the man and baby that you love.
But I applaude all the filipinas who do this, for me its going to be the other way around, Bert will come here. He works on ships at the minut so he's used to being away from the Phils but I hope he is able to settle into life here.
I think it must be more difficult for people from the Phils to leave their country than us Brits, you all have sucha strong sense of family, I was amazed at how close Berts family were! But then again I have the most disjointed family in the world!
Anyway, keep your chin up!
Love
Kxx
dont worry sis,now that you have Bert,you can have lots of family,coz for sure they accept you as part of thier family:)
Mrs Daddy
26th September 2008, 18:33
Since experiencing away from home for about two years before coming to U.K it really not bothers me much about going back to P.I.Probably I get used to being away from them (my family) and I know that I could go back home for a visits so it not worry me much.
Mrs.JMajor
29th September 2008, 00:33
.I maybe spoiled and stubborn or maybe lazy,but I miss being serve by our helper.Philippines.
:D Now u need to wash plates and do household chores,well.. find job dear friend so u can save money and u both can have savings and go back to PI again:rolleyes:
telford
29th September 2008, 18:54
:D Now u need to wash plates and do household chores,well.. find job dear friend so u can save money and u both can have savings and go back to PI again:rolleyes:
Korek ka dyan Sis Juliet:)
Hopefully my passport will be back soon so that we can go back to Pinas this Christmas:)
GaryFifer
30th September 2008, 14:05
Okay just some observations,probably over the top.
I don't miss the smelly streets, the stinky water,the paying for CR paper, disgusting CR, nasty diseases,the paying for hospitals, the dentists, and the drugs, and the begging street kids who noone cares about. And they say they are Christian country letting kids roam streets outside the big SM malls?I don't miss the corrupt guards, majors and bar girls causing trouble.
Its not all green pastures.But one day when you get clean water, and start a civilised society then you get will tourists.Until the many problems are ironed out and Filipinos get off their asses and stop putting up with 2nd best and PROTEST- we will see.
jimeve
30th September 2008, 16:58
Sounds like England to me :
Juana
30th September 2008, 17:29
Ever since i had my first taste of the reality of life in the Philippines, there's nothing i would want more than to leave Philippines. Got a good education and grabbed the first opportunity to greener pasture.
Three weeks after arriving in England, i started a job. First year was busy as I have to start from scratch. Got a driver's license, took tests for my professional registration, bought a house, etc.
I met good friends. Have good paying job. Have a house. Two years later, we planned of moving abroad. Took tests again and now we're heading for US. Got registered and started looking for employers. But it takes two to tango...my husband wasn't making a move. So that dream is gone.
A year later, my sister arrived here for good. It made life so much easier, at least i have a family here now. I have a great bro-in-law who is also my colleague and a beautiful niece.
Now, a year has passed and still unhappy. Why? I don't know exactly. I now have what i always wanted... a good job, a house, a car and a husband. I would not like anything else (materially anyway). Maybe my marriage? I am not going to hide, we are having problems. Or maybe is it me affecting our marriage? Still unsure.
At the age of 26 and have lived here in England for 4 years, many people said "The world is my Oyster". It's really true "There's no place like home". I am not even like some of you who have big families. All i have are my 2 sisters and my parents back home. I have cousins whom i rarely see and spoke to. I don't know maybe i'm just a miserable git who doesn't know what she wants exactly.
I am now working hard to save money to make a good start for myself back to the Philippines.
Sangoma
30th September 2008, 19:18
I live in the UK through choice.
We made a choice that my daughter would have a better chance in life if we moved to the UK.
In 2002 we sold our house, gave up everything we had worked for, and arrived in the UK with 3 suitcaes, We were fortunate that we had some money, but with the collapse of the rand at the end of 2001, it was a start and a deposit on a house, but that was all.
In March/April 2006, were were saying we had got to where we wanted to be, and were looking forward to starting to fully enjoy life. That came to a very abrupt end in May 2006 when my wife was told she had cancer, and was given a few months to live (though she wasn't told that, and she did not ask)
The hospital treatments, help from church members, help from my work (I stayed at home with her for the whole time), the help from everyone around was incredible.
Don't judge the English by their everyday actions, when there is a problem they are there to help.
During the time shortly after my wife's death, I was tempted on a number of occasions to pack up in the UK and return to South Africa. The maqin reason I did not was I weould have wasted what my wife gave up when she left her country to come to the UK.
I would have had friends and family around, but what problems would that have solved? It would have been nice for the first few weeks, but all the challenges of life would have still been there.
For similar reasons, I don't think moving countries will make a marriage better, or solve any problems, it will just move the same problems to a different place.
I have seem many South Africans feel very unhappy in the UK, then they move somewhere else, and are still unhappy. Generally the ones who are happiest are the ones who make the best of what they have, and appreciate they can not have their home country an British living at the same time
How do you adjust? I dont know. It too my daughter and I one day to adjust to the Philippines, but after nearly sixeeks back in the UK, neither of uf have adjusted back to the UK fully yet.
AND THIS ic the biggest worry I have when my wife and her son join us here from the Philippines. If I had money to live, I could easily give up all the conveniences and so called civilisation we have here to live in the Philippines. Will she be able to give up the Philippines for a few worthles material things??? I hope that our marriage and our desire to spend our lives together will be the decider!!
Ann07
30th September 2008, 19:24
Since experiencing away from home for about two years before coming to U.K it really not bothers me much about going back to P.I.Probably I get used to being away from them (my family) and I know that I could go back home for a visits so it not worry me much.
You are right mrsdaddy:xxgrinning--00xx3: id been away for 6 years from my family and spent few months in cebu before coming here. I think that really helps me, i do miss my family so much but with our new age i could get in touch with them all the time plus we know that we can always go back for a visit:)
You are right grace its really tough now having a baby. We have to prioritize them first:) for their own good.
Jay&Zobel
30th September 2008, 21:25
Philippines will always be our home no matter what.
But UK is now our home, which is sometimes very hard to accept this fact.
Oh I pray for those who are unhappy here will soon find their way. And for those who love their new life, to try to encourage and inspire those you are "newbies".
keithAngel
2nd October 2008, 09:10
Very thought provoking posts.....
because of similar thinking myself I had decided I would spend the first couple of years commuting to the Fils for half the time in the hope that if I could live there, or here as it is now then I would be better equipped in my relationship to consider other options rather than go for the England visa route .
I am a lover already of the climate here and see it as much easier to intigrate myself here than uproot my honey at least untill we have a good foundation with one another it feels abit like taking a fish (not dried) out of water and I for one appreciate the social groups here (from a slight distance) in a few years perhaps we will go to Thai or maybe Portugal but for now I am happy here in the early days
ANDRES25
3rd October 2008, 09:35
Reading the posts above made me appreciate my life here in the Philippines more and I think I have to enjoy my life here now as much as possible before I join my husband there in the UK. I'm not expecting my life there would be easy. I will have to work hard and start from scratch like most of the other members did. It's just so sad to think that most filipinos here in the Philippines think that when you're in the UK or America you already have a good life but that isn't true at all maybe for some lucky people yes... I admire all of you who stay there and make all the sacrifices just to give your family a better life. I hope to be there soon too and will do the same.
flomike
3rd October 2008, 13:31
I am still hoping one day to live in the Phils for good:) though I am going to apply for my naturalization this year (hopefully go to the next level on applying for dual citizenship afterwards)
But for financial reason we can't afford it right now (my husband's main concern living in the Phils is our health insurance) so I am just glad that my husband is morethan willing to live in the Phils in the future:) Let see what the future brings for us:)
flomike
3rd October 2008, 13:44
Reading the posts above made me appreciate my life here in the Philippines more and I think I have to enjoy my life here now as much as possible before I join my husband there in the UK. I'm not expecting my life there would be easy. I will have to work hard and start from scratch like most of the other members did. It's just so sad to think that most filipinos here in the Philippines think that when you're in the UK or America you already have a good life but that isn't true at all maybe for some lucky people yes... I admire all of you who stay there and make all the sacrifices just to give your family a better life. I hope to be there soon too and will do the same.
Very well said:xxgrinning--00xx3: Life is more harder here if you don't work (unless your husband is lucky enough earning big money and can support your family in the Phils) I would say I did appreciate the value of money here bec now I know how my husband works so hard to have a decent life.
Jay&Zobel
3rd October 2008, 20:34
Reading the posts above made me appreciate my life here in the Philippines more and I think I have to enjoy my life here now as much as possible before I join my husband there in the UK. I'm not expecting my life there would be easy. I will have to work hard and start from scratch like most of the other members did. It's just so sad to think that most filipinos here in the Philippines think that when you're in the UK or America you already have a good life but that isn't true at all maybe for some lucky people yes... I admire all of you who stay there and make all the sacrifices just to give your family a better life. I hope to be there soon too and will do the same.
Definitely you have to! once you are here, you'll miss everything about your past life etc. But God bless you!
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