life....

[maria_and_matt]

i have been reading a lot in this forum and majority of what i see are couples so in love and desperate to be together.
for me life has not been the way i thought it would. i came to the uk 17 yrs ago young and so looking forward to married life. my first marriage did not really went according to plan and we divorced after 5 longggggggg years. we have a son who is the love of my life.
i have since then remarried, we have been married 8 years now. the problem is i think lies with me. i am not happy. for me happiness is having someone who is affectionate and 'malambing'. my husband provides well for me and my son, i know i might sound so ungrateful but our life is so boring. i have not worked since we got married, my husband is not keen for me to work, he often says looking after is our home is a full time job as it is, i think so too but maybe i need to meet new people. do not get me wrong i have friends here i go shopping with, but it is the same people, same things we do, same topic we talk about.
i often tell my husband that life is not all about money, cars or a lovely home. he seem to really love me, but shows his love in material things. all i have to do is ask and he gives. but is this what life is all about? i mean how many pair of shoes can a woman have? how many times in a year can i change cars? i want something more from our life.
i have spoken to hubby about this before, nothing changes though, he is still the way he is. now what more can i do? do i stay and learn to accept that he is not the affectionate type? or do i make a move?
please please anyone :bigcry:

[cruisingkerry]

Thats a difficult question really. Believe me life is not amazing as a single mid 30 year old full time working woman.

You have to ask yourself what YOU really want from life and if your husband is willing to support you to achieve it. has your husband ever been affectionate or is it a new thing?

Are you not suffering from a, dare I say it, mid life crisis?? i know I'm finding life very difficult at the minute, bert being 9000 miles away, feeling guilty about all the money I've squandered over the years so now that I have something I really, really, really want I don't have the money I need to achieve it (thats Berts visa and bringing him over here), desperately wanting to have a child with him, family problems, money worries, lonliness... the list goes on. And I'm 37 too... and now I know whats important to me but I can't have it just yet.

So you really need to sit yourself down, decide what your 'problems' for want of a better word and make a plan to get it.

Its up to you girl!

K xx

[Tish]

Reading your post Maria makes me sad. Not because of what you said about your life being boring, but it is because you failed to see what life is all about.

I'm a firm believer that life is how you make it, not what your husband or anyone for that matter to make life less 'boring' for you :NoNo:

Maybe you just need to look at your life from a different angle, and who knows, you might see a different view altogether.

Tish

[maria_and_matt]

Thats a difficult question really. Believe me life is not amazing as a single mid 30 year old full time working woman.

You have to ask yourself what YOU really want from life and if your husband is willing to support you to achieve it. has your husband ever been affectionate or is it a new thing?

Are you not suffering from a, dare I say it, mid life crisis?? i know I'm finding life very difficult at the minute, bert being 9000 miles away, feeling guilty about all the money I've squandered over the years so now that I have something I really, really, really want I don't have the money I need to achieve it (thats Berts visa and bringing him over here), desperately wanting to have a child with him, family problems, money worries, lonliness... the list goes on. And I'm 37 too... and now I know whats important to me but I can't have it just yet.

So you really need to sit yourself down, decide what your 'problems' for want of a better word and make a plan to get it.

Its up to you girl!

K xx

mid life crisis maybe... i have had a rough time since we got married, i had cancer and had a hysterectomy as a result, i just really want us to be a family. just like what is was with my family when my father was alive. i find that life here in the uk is not as what we had back home. my husband is under a lot of pressure at work i think. but we rarely talk. he spends most of his time down stairs after work watching movies, i have tried to sit down there with him and to make conversation but somehow it always ends up in silence. i asked him if he is maybe a little upset coz we couldn't have a child of our own and he says no it is not about that, he'd rather have me alive than raise a child by himself. and i went on to ask if maybe he is not in love with me anymore, its not that either. all of my friends tell me i am crazy for thinking all this, they all say my husband adores me, but how come i do not feel that?

[maria_and_matt]

Reading your post Maria makes me sad. Not because of what you said about your life being boring, but it is because you failed to see what life is all about.

I'm a firm believer that life is how you make it, not what your husband or anyone for that matter to make life less 'boring' for you :NoNo:

Maybe you just need to look at your life from a different angle, and who knows, you might see a different view altogether.

Tish

i am aware that life is what i make it... that is why i find other ways to entertain myself...
but our home life should be what we, my husband and i, makes it. it just feels like it is all down to me to make conversation here at home, i have noticed lately that if i am moody everyone else is too even the dog!
and i dont think i have failed to see what life is all about, i am very aware of what life should be about.

[Tish]

i am aware that life is what i make it... that is why i find other ways to entertain myself...
but our home life should be what we, my husband and i, makes it. it just feels like it is all down to me to make conversation here at home, i have noticed lately that if i am moody everyone else is too even the dog!
and i dont think i have failed to see what life is all about, i am very aware of what life should be about.

Hahaha :icon_lol: Same here Maria. When I'm moody, I feel like the rest of my family are moody too. It's not until I sit down and try to see things from their point of view, that I see a different side of it all! :doh

Tish

[maria_and_matt]

Hahaha :icon_lol: Same here Maria. When I'm moody, I feel like the rest of my family are moody too. It's not until I sit down and try to see things from their point of view, that I see a different side of it all! :doh

Tish
i do try to see things from my husbands point of view, but you know what, i just dont see it :cwm34:

[Tish]

i do try to see things from my husbands point of view, but you know what, i just dont see it :cwm34:

It might be that you're not seeing things because you don't want to?

And will it help if you get to speak to a third party about what you're feeling at present?

Tish

[jbt]

hi sis maria,

maybe its about time for you and your husband to go on a holiday, somewhere romantic, where both of you can really talk (heart to heart)and rekindle the romance:)...

:cwm38:

[PAT]

hi sis maria,

maybe its about time for you and your husband to go on a holiday, somewhere romantic, where both of you can really talk (heart to heart)and rekindle the romance:)...

:cwm38:

:xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3:

[maria_and_matt]

hi sis maria,

maybe its about time for you and your husband to go on a holiday, somewhere romantic, where both of you can really talk (heart to heart)and rekindle the romance:)...

:cwm38:

his work sched don't permit us to go away at present, we only go away xmas, easter and back home for 4 to 5 weeks in august.

[IainBusby]

his work sched don't permit us to go away at present, we only go away xmas, easter and back home for 4 to 5 weeks in august.

ONLY, My god, I wish I could afford to go away for a holiday at xmas, easter and 4 or 5 weeks in phils every year. I also wish I could afford to change my car, now nearly 4 yrs old, at least once a year. I could afford it if I took the money from my savings, but my wife would see it as pure extravagance. You just can't see how really lucky you are.
Iain.

[KeithD]

i mean how many pair of shoes can a woman have?


From a mans point of view...."Never enough" :D

Trina is right, it is only you who can change it, start a business or something, you don't need much money.

I make money from gambling, run over 50 web sites, have just hit Powerseller status on eBay, something I set out to do from a starting pot of only £200 back in March, and now have over £3000 in stock. Now I've accomplished that, I move onto my next goal. :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[maria_and_matt]

ONLY, My god, I wish I could afford to go away for a holiday at xmas, easter and 4 or 5 weeks in phils every year. I also wish I could afford to change my car, now nearly 4 yrs old, at least once a year. I could afford it if I took the money from my savings, but my wife would see it as pure extravagance. You just can't see how really lucky you are.
Iain.

i can honestly say that material things don't matter match, i just want our relationship to get back on track. i can live without holidays, money or cars. i just want my husband to be more involved in our relationship not just be a provider. and i do know i am lucky to have him, but as i said before life is not all about money.

[maria_and_matt]

From a mans point of view...."Never enough" :D

Trina is right, it is only you who can change it, start a business or something, you don't need much money.

I make money from gambling, run over 50 web sites, have just hit Powerseller status on eBay, something I set out to do from a starting pot of only £200 back in March, and now have over £3000 in stock. Now I've accomplished that, I move onto my next goal. :xxgrinning--00xx3:

i might have to look into that... that seem a good return... thanks boss..

[IainBusby]

i can honestly say that material things don't matter match, i just want our relationship to get back on track. i can live without holidays, money or cars. i just want my husband to be more involved in our relationship not just be a provider. and i do know i am lucky to have him, but as i said before life is not all about money.

I very glad to hear that. As the old saying goes, count your blessings and when things are not going so well, count them all up very carefully. Life is never perfect, not for anyone.
Iain.

[Geraldine]

Hi Maria,

Maybe bec your life is routinely the same every day...why not just plan something different with your husband and son. Go for a day out or do some family activity. I know how boring it is just to stay at home...do the same things every single day...it just goes on and on makes you go mad. As they say 'same sh*t different day'

My life is like that actually...boring but now I have a once a week exercise class and another badminton session with some Filipino friends. At least makes life less boring. Start a business or join a hobby class or cooking class, make your time worthwhile...if I get a chance someday I plan to take up a short course or something.

Talk to your husband again, insist that you want to have a part time job at least to ease boredom. Or maybe he just doesnt like the idea of you meeting other blokes :D that is why he wants you to just stay at home.

[jbt]

his work sched don't permit us to go away at present, we only go away xmas, easter and back home for 4 to 5 weeks in august.

wow, sis, i think it's more than enough (in terms of going away), i wish we can afford to go on holiday more than once.

anyway, another couple of months and xmas is here and whatever holiday destination you both choose, i hope you'll be able to talk to your husband about what you really feel.

you mentioned earlier, the problem (you think) lies w/you, you're not happy, but what will make you happy? maybe a job or as boss keith mentioned start a business, something that you can do at home maybe....or maybe a part time job...you really need to sit down with your husband sis, discuss what you truly feel, ask what he truly feels and maybe you both can do something about it....you have to do it asap before it becomes a major issue.

:)

[marylen]

ohhhh.. sorry to hear about how your marriage works out in the past. I fairly believe that HAPPINESS is not all about money itself NOR any material things u may have...still on top of the very most important that need to acquire in LIFE is to be with someone that makes you feel the most valuable things on earth that no one ever can compare you as such. Its proven to be tested on my own self. I may having no much expensive things to live by....yet.... having a very supportive, understanding and loving husband is what i already count the most. Ops....he is not that perfect as you think.....coz no one is...but as part of loving someone you can dare to accept all about his weaknesses. I am very much contended the way how our marriage works although there is some UPS and DOWNS but that teach us to grow as a better person.

yes maybe your husband is not that affectionate type, we can't compare one's self to others, he has his own way of showing his LOVE to you, why not try to look it out in a different way instead of looking for something that you think you haven't which i think you are more blissful than compare to any. oh Maria...LIFE is not a bed of roses, each one of us has its own set of worries and difficulties in dealing our LIFE with ....Sorry I may not say that I am having a perfect LIFE nor i mean a perfect FAMILY in my own....no matter how imperfect LIFE would be....I still count and appreciate the beauty on what life occur in me, it do helps me grow as a mature individual anyway.......... so be proud and enjoy all out. k....

[maria_and_matt]

thank you for all your replies i do take it to heart and started to slowly think of things i can do to make things better. today i went to the age concern and i will be doing voluntary work with them really soon. i do appreciate all your suggestions. i just hope it is not too late to make things right.

[jbt]

thank you for all your replies i do take it to heart and started to slowly think of things i can do to make things better. today i went to the age concern and i will be doing voluntary work with them really soon. i do appreciate all your suggestions. i just hope it is not too late to make things right.


Goodluck sis and all the best :)

[maria_and_matt]

Goodluck sis and all the best :)
thank you so much sis

[marylen]

yeah you right...go get it.....thats a wise move anyway.....maybe by doing so...you feel much content and happy then....oh better too late than never..............more things ahead of you and just enjoy every steps of your way............you may for sure find whats your heart says so.......Good Luck...

[maria_and_matt]

yeah you right...go get it.....thats a wise move anyway.....maybe by doing so...you feel much content and happy then....oh better too late than never..............more things ahead of you and just enjoy every steps of your way............you may for sure find whats your heart says so.......Good Luck...
thank you sis, i said a little prayer for you too, hope you get your visa real soon

[amyburple]

Sorry to hear that Sis... I truly believe that everything has s purpose and our life is not perfect... You are lucky in a way that you have everything in terms of material but yes of course it will not satisfy our needs... GOD is the only ONE that GIVE US the REAL JOY, HAPPINESS and SATISFACTION in LIFE.. Though prayers everything will be fine and have FAITH, what ever circumstances that your going through right now I guess the right and perfect time will be yours... Just hang on sis and believe that there's no IMPOSSIBLE to GOD. Just lay down everything to GOD what is your HEARTS DESIRE and by FAITH He will grant it.

GOD BLESS YOU Sis^^,

[maria_and_matt]

Sorry to hear that Sis... I truly believe that everything has s purpose and our life is not perfect... You are lucky in a way that you have everything in terms of material but yes of course it will not satisfy our needs... GOD is the only ONE that GIVE US the REAL JOY, HAPPINESS and SATISFACTION in LIFE.. Though prayers everything will be fine and have FAITH, what ever circumstances that your going through right now I guess the right and perfect time will be yours... Just hang on sis and believe that there's no IMPOSSIBLE to GOD. Just lay down everything to GOD what is your HEARTS DESIRE and by FAITH He will grant it.

GOD BLESS YOU Sis^^,



well said sis, thank you.

[Frances]

hello Maria!

Have a heart to heart talk with your husband,many relationship fail because of lack of communication and intimacy.

It is human nature to want to feel wanted and feel loved.

Let him know how you really feel before it becomes resentment, miscommunication can lead to misunderstanding.

I have spoken to my grandmother a few days ago i ask her what was there secret of a happy marriage she told me just one thing "Listen" when your partner is talking to you and vice versa.

Good luck on your volunteer work and remember you are not alone if you still feel the same seek counseling it helps.

Take care

[amyburple]

well said sis, thank you.

your VERY MUCH WELCOME sis maria :xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3:

Invite me shopping one day LOL for a change :Hellooo::Hellooo::Hellooo:

[maria_and_matt]

hello Maria!

Have a heart to heart talk with your husband,many relationship fail because of lack of communication and intimacy.

It is human nature to want to feel wanted and feel loved.

Let him know how you really feel before it becomes resentment, miscommunication can lead to misunderstanding.

I have spoken to my grandmother a few days ago i ask her what was there secret of a happy marriage she told me just one thing "Listen" when your partner is talking to you and vice versa.

Good luck on your volunteer work and remember you are not alone if you still feel the same seek counseling it helps.

Take care

i do try to talk to him openly but i think my husband has a hard time to express his feelings. unlike me i am vocal of what i feel, my husband just tends to nod along in agreement. i do agree with you about communication and intimacy, we do not have both. i talk he nods thats it. we are no longer intimate, i think that we are just in it for companionship.

[Frances]

I admire you for acknowledging that you have a problem other people pretend that nothing is wrong until its too late.

I have been in a relationship for 10 years our relationship failed not because we don't love each other anymore it is because our relationship has become a way of life we both took things for granted we no longer gave importance to each other.

We stop talking the way we use to before because we assume that because we love each other things will be OK,but we were wrong love needs constant nurturing it never stops.

Being intimate is not just all about physical relationship.

Intimacy it is giving value to a person showing you care being affectionate like holding hands,back rub after a long day at work,having someone to tell our innermost feelings,having loving personal relationship,it gives us reassurance that we are important and we are loved.

I have been given another chance to love again and I know better now than before.

[Frances]

Maria try to do things together watch a movie,go dancing,play sports that you both like anything that would make you bond together.
Just be patient and Pray always.

[maria_and_matt]

Maria try to do things together watch a movie,go dancing,play sports that you both like anything that would make you bond together.
Just be patient and Pray always.

we do go out as a family a lot, maybe we are just not meant to be :(... i do try hard i really do, but lately i have been tired to try

[cheesewiz]

some people will say what a lucky life you have! how many of us here want to have a life like yours...but I find my self lucky enough to have a job here in UK and able to help family back home and save a bit for my future and get married perhaps when the right time comes..so time will tell!!!

[andypaul]

You may not need Money but why not do Voluntary work you will get out make a difference to peoples Lifes and have something to tell your Hubby when you get back home.

[Jay&Zobel]

This is from your signature: obviously you have changed the last part (lol):xxgrinning--00xx3:
__________________

God grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change, the courage to change the things i can and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people i had to kill because they pissed me off. :D


__________________


But I think this will help your situation:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change and the courage to change the things i can and the wisdom to know the difference.:cwm38:


May God Bless you my friend...

[maria_and_matt]

You may not need Money but why not do Voluntary work you will get out make a difference to peoples Lifes and have something to tell your Hubby when you get back home.
yeah i will do voluntary work with the age concern, i am just waiting for the police check. i cannot wait to start.

[maria_and_matt]

This is from your signature: obviously you have changed the last part (lol):xxgrinning--00xx3:
__________________

God grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change, the courage to change the things i can and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people i had to kill because they pissed me off. :D


__________________


But I think this will help your situation:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change and the courage to change the things i can and the wisdom to know the difference.:cwm38:


May God Bless you my friend...

thank you sis, will bear that in mind

[robeth]

hi maria,

dont despair, lots of ppl are in the same situation as yours so you're not alone in this problem.

read a lot of self help books...

HAVE A LIFE, and

i find this very inspiring:

"Marriage is not supposed to make you happy.
It’s supposed to make you married, and once you are safely and totally married then you have a structure of security and support from which you are free to make yourself happy, rather than wasting your adulthood looking for structure."

Frank Pittmam

Good luck!

[Ana_may365]

i think u need a 2nd time for honeymoon:D:D:D

[maria_and_matt]

i think u need a 2nd time for honeymoon:D:D:D

:icon_lol:

[cruisingkerry]

Hi Maria,

Sorry to hear about your health problems, that must have been really difficult for you and your husband. Do you feel like you had the right support following your surgery and cancer treatment? I mean, counselling and that kind of support. Sometimes when you go through a rough time like that it has bearings on your future life even if you don't feel like it does. Do you feel guilty that you can't give your gusband a child? even if its not your fault? just something to think about.

I think that even just starting this thread is a step in the right direction to working out a little bit more about you.

Love
K xx

[pennybarry]

i can honestly say that material things don't matter match, i just want our relationship to get back on track. i can live without holidays, money or cars. i just want my husband to be more involved in our relationship not just be a provider. and i do know i am lucky to have him, but as i said before life is not all about money.


I met a lot of filipinas with much boring life than yours! I also met a young chinese girl who is married to Brit. I asked her if she was ready when she gave birth for her 4 month old son. She said NO, I was not ready and feel boring now she said. So please be thankful for that. Try some reverse psychology too. I feel boring if my hubby plays his PS3. Then I'll take a shower and later tell him I'll go to my friend house. He will say OK:xxgrinning--00xx3: but in few minutes he will pick me up and ask me where I want to go. If I feel unwanted, I trully tell him I NEED A HUG, I WANT SWEET NOTHINGS! I'LL START telling funny stories, scracth/ massage his back, and he will turn his attention to me:D:icon_lol:

Try making friends too. But choose the genuine one. I had 2 in our place and if she feels boring I'm always there if I have really time. Real friends will always make you feel happy:BouncyHappy:

[GaryFifer]

My mum was in same situation. Her children were settled in school and apart from housework she was bored.

She approached the local jobcentre who advised the local college were offering free courses giving access to education and training for women returners. These were aimed at women whose children were settled or were at secondary school and wanted to go back to work/training and see what options were available. Most of these were free or you could get a small grant to pay cost of course and travel/books etc. She attended an open day at the college and spoke to women such as herself who had undergone this process and were now students and enjoying college life. She was daunted by this as she thought most college students were youngsters but found to her surprise students nowadays were of mixed ages and there were quite a lot of men and women in the lessons.

She applied for an access course (in Scotland) maybe different in England. This course gave a variety of modules in business studies, economics, child care, secreterial work, and social care as well as modules in various aspects of working life. She enrolled and found she could fit in college from 4-6 hours daily and she could cope with essays and written work in her sparetime. She loved this.

There was an international womens day at the college In comparing experiences with other females she found they all either had a moan from their husbands and sometimes resentment from the males about being left the housework due to college comittments.

Some men did not like the new independence the women found and their new relationships/friendships at college. Despite this she graduated at college with a new load of qualifications and the entry level for university if she desired. She was proud of her achievements and glad she chose this route.

Do not be frightened to ask. All the women talked about were from 25/50 upwards in age. New freedom and using all the skills/experiences she gained. Life is waiting out there - embrace this and forge ahead.

Good luck in your search for fulfillment as a person.

[maria_and_matt]

Hi Maria,

Sorry to hear about your health problems, that must have been really difficult for you and your husband. Do you feel like you had the right support following your surgery and cancer treatment? I mean, counselling and that kind of support. Sometimes when you go through a rough time like that it has bearings on your future life even if you don't feel like it does. Do you feel guilty that you can't give your gusband a child? even if its not your fault? just something to think about.

I think that even just starting this thread is a step in the right direction to working out a little bit more about you.

Love
K xx

i had no support when i was undergoing cancer treatment and after my surgery. my husband didnt even go with me when i was having my radiation sessions. he missed all of it, i remember sitting in hospital crying coz i was so lonely, that is when i felt like i was so alone. that feeling never left me.
when i had my hysterectomy i was in hospital for 3 days my husband never made it on time on visiting hours, he would turn up halfway through it. enough said i feel like crying already.
i dont feel guilty about not having a child with my husband. i made a choice to have the op so i live longer for my son. he means the world to me. i think that without my matthew i would died ages ago. i cannot take the things that happened to me here.
my filipino friends all tell me ' oh well at least you have money', they just dont know i'd rather be without money but have a better relationship with my husband.
thank you so much for asking me these questions it made me think a lot.

[maria_and_matt]

I met a lot of filipinas with much boring life than yours! I also met a young chinese girl who is married to Brit. I asked her if she was ready when she gave birth for her 4 month old son. She said NO, I was not ready and feel boring now she said. So please be thankful for that. Try some reverse psychology too. I feel boring if my hubby plays his PS3. Then I'll take a shower and later tell him I'll go to my friend house. He will say OK:xxgrinning--00xx3: but in few minutes he will pick me up and ask me where I want to go. If I feel unwanted, I trully tell him I NEED A HUG, I WANT SWEET NOTHINGS! I'LL START telling funny stories, scracth/ massage his back, and he will turn his attention to me:D:icon_lol:

Try making friends too. But choose the genuine one. I had 2 in our place and if she feels boring I'm always there if I have really time. Real friends will always make you feel happy:BouncyHappy:

i have lots of friends. i go out out alot with them.
i agree real friends makes me happy but what happen when i have to go home. it is not boredom i feel, its lonliness.

[maria_and_matt]

My mum was in same situation. Her children were settled in school and apart from housework she was bored.

She approached the local jobcentre who advised the local college were offering free courses giving access to education and training for women returners. These were aimed at women whose children were settled or were at secondary school and wanted to go back to work/training and see what options were available. Most of these were free or you could get a small grant to pay cost of course and travel/books etc. She attended an open day at the college and spoke to women such as herself who had undergone this process and were now students and enjoying college life. She was daunted by this as she thought most college students were youngsters but found to her surprise students nowadays were of mixed ages and there were quite a lot of men and women in the lessons.

She applied for an access course (in Scotland) maybe different in England. This course gave a variety of modules in business studies, economics, child care, secreterial work, and social care as well as modules in various aspects of working life. She enrolled and found she could fit in college from 4-6 hours daily and she could cope with essays and written work in her sparetime. She loved this.

There was an international womens day at the college In comparing experiences with other females she found they all either had a moan from their husbands and sometimes resentment from the males about being left the housework due to college comittments.

Some men did not like the new independence the women found and their new relationships/friendships at college. Despite this she graduated at college with a new load of qualifications and the entry level for university if she desired. She was proud of her achievements and glad she chose this route.

Do not be frightened to ask. All the women talked about were from 25/50 upwards in age. New freedom and using all the skills/experiences she gained. Life is waiting out there - embrace this and forge ahead.

Good luck in your search for fulfillment as a person.


thank you for that, i will look into it.

[maria_and_matt]

just to give a few updates as to what i have been doing... when the bt shares hit 1.20 this morning i bought £15k's worth, will sell it when it doubles. been playing and watching the shares very interesting.
i have also been shopping on base (american) and had lotsa fun this weekend. i barely saw my husband, maybe life without him ain't so bad. see you all later guys i am off to lunch with friends hope you all have a good monday.

[reginacarlson]

i do try to talk to him openly but i think my husband has a hard time to express his feelings. unlike me i am vocal of what i feel, my husband just tends to nod along in agreement. i do agree with you about communication and intimacy, we do not have both. i talk he nods thats it. we are no longer intimate, i think that we are just in it for companionship.

I think you should give each other hugs, they're therapeutical and it greatly boost moods. Also say "I love you" more, don't let it become just a routine. Find new, exciting, or even funny ways to spout your love for your husband. Try slipping a note in his pocket or wallet, tracing it in the bathroom mirror after a hot shower, or even just whispering it to him first thing in the morning!
I also read somewhere that you should initiate some passionate kisses, it might be ackward at first but what better way to rekindle your relationship than being intimate. You should also try dressing sexy specially when you're husband is around :D