Taking a RISK !!!

[KARATEKA]

Hi People :):),

Well this may sound abit odd but here goes.

I have been talking to a girl from the philippines for about a week now and she seem's really understanding she is very cute too , we have been chatting on msn and emails and the phone. But she says she loves me but we have never met and then i think is it just about her wanting to love my cash then she was telling about how much a item cost it was about 13,000,00 pesos about £20 GBP then i asked her if she wanted me to buy but she said no as she said that she don't care about money now this was a item that she would like to own , so maybe she is not seeking to love my CASH .



NOW the PROBLEM !!!
I am with somebody at the moment but not happy for many reason's and i would like to make a new start she said you would like to marry me and start a family this sound so nice i just don't know if i should take a risk as you hear many things with asian girls just being with a guy for cash.

[aromulus]

Hi People :):),

Well this may sound abit odd but here goes.

I have been talking to a girl from the philippines for about a week now and she seem's really understanding she is very cute too , we have been chatting on msn and emails and the phone. But she says she loves me but we have never met and then i think is it just about her wanting to love my cash then she was telling about how much a item cost it was about 13,000,00 pesos about £200 GBP then i asked her if she wanted me to buy but she said no as she said that she don't care about money now this was a item that she would like to own , so maybe she is not seeking to love my CASH .
NOW the PROBLEM !!!
I am with somebody at the moment but not happy for many reason's and i would like to make a new start she said you would like to marry me and start a family this sound so nice i just don't know if i should take a risk as you hear many things with asian girls just being with a guy for cash.

A week and already big hint about money and marriage......:Erm:

If this ain't a red flag, nothing else is.....:NoNo:

Keep on chatting, keep the money where it belongs, ie your pocket... And se where it takes you, do not mention nuptials, presents, and take care in not listening to stories of severe hardships, ie roofs blown off by the wind, cousins in hospital, or emergencies of any description.:doh

In a few months time, when you got rid of whatever baggage you are carrying, take a holiday overthere, meet the girl and if you two click, then you can start planning for some kind of future.

In case of doubts keep on posting, we will try to help in keeping you alert to scams.

Filipinas are very proud ladies, and none of them would ask you for anything at this early stage in the relationship or ever.:xxgrinning--00xx3:

Obviously there are scammers around, but those are in the minority, and unfortunately they give all the good and decent ones, which are in the vast majority, a bad name.

However you decide to act, one thing is very important.... Do not part with any money.:NoNo:

You will see that other members will agree with me.
This smells of a slight scam and she is probing you....:omg:
But of course I could be wrong and if I am, I apologize now.:D

In regard to your baggage....... Sort that one out first...:doh


Good luck and welcome aboard.:xxgrinning--00xx3:

[mavid]

I agree with Dom... Don't rush it. Take time to get to know her more.

[lavander]

Take one step at a time...Settle first ur current situation and then focus with the new girl......

Besides, it seems ur still on the 'getting to know you' stage with the Filipina girl.
So dont take rush...or u might overlooked bit but vital info about her ...

Good Luck!..

[KARATEKA]

Maybe i got the price wrong lol, the item was a phone maybe 1300 pesos she said i don't think she was seeking money but she said top on the phone is 100 pesos and you can send about 3 sms to the uk , when i was in thailand on a thai orange sim for 50 baht i could call the uk for ages .

I just want a new start somewhere

How can i find out if she is not a con ass

[PeterB]

Hi, welcome.

I'm sure that many of us have been in a similar position, and there will always be doubts and suspicions in a long-distance relationship. It's a shame that a few bad filipinas have spoiled the reputation of all.

I agree with Dom in many respects, but I wouldn't necessarily see a red flag and back off just yet. A good filipina is very faithful and devoted.

Yes, sort out your current situation - you say it's not good, so be prepared to make the break.

If you are really serious, and believe that your chat mate might be also, then keep chatting - but do look out for suspicious signs. Tell us where this girl lives - if there is someone on the forum who comes from the same area, then there is a good chance that they have friends in common.

If you look in the 'Your Blog' forum, you should be able to find 'The Tale of Pete (and Ruby)'. However, to cut a long story short, I met Ruby online in April 2007. I came to visit her within 6 weeks of that first meeting, and again in July. My third visit, in September 2007, was to accompany Ruby back to the UK. We returned to Philippines in December 2007, married in February 2008, and I have no plans to go back to UK. Our daughter is due in about two months.

[pennybarry]

Hi People :):),

Well this may sound abit odd but here goes.

I have been talking to a girl from the philippines for about a week now and she seem's really understanding she is very cute too , we have been chatting on msn and emails and the phone. But she says she loves me but we have never met and then i think is it just about her wanting to love my cash then she was telling about how much a item cost it was about 13,000,00 pesos about £20 GBP then i asked her if she wanted me to buy but she said no as she said that she don't care about money now this was a item that she would like to own , so maybe she is not seeking to love my CASH .



NOW the PROBLEM !!!
I am with somebody at the moment but not happy for many reason's and i would like to make a new start she said you would like to marry me and start a family this sound so nice i just don't know if i should take a risk as you hear many things with asian girls just being with a guy for cash.

If you have somebody and chatting with another lady, it seems that is the first problem I can see at the moment. If you get involved and inlove with this filipina, then it will be another problem.:Erm:

There is no such mobile phone in the Philippines that cost 1,300 unless it's from a snatcher:D

Just be careful to cuties:action-smiley-081: A real inlove Filipina never ask money for just a week chatting:NoNo: I never asked money from my hubby although he's insisting me some cash:D. But when I met him personally and offered money to buy more computers for my shop, then I agree. Now we are married, he's not insisting me to accept his cash:icon_lol::Brick:
He must be happy now I'm not asking for cash:D, I just open his wallet and get some cash:xxgrinning--00xx3: joke:action-smiley-081:

[PeterB]

Maybe i got the price wrong lol, the item was a phone maybe 1300 pesos she said i don't think she was seeking money but she said top on the phone is 100 pesos and you can send about 3 sms to the uk , when i was in thailand on a thai orange sim for 50 baht i could call the uk for ages .

I just want a new start somewhere

How can i find out if she is not a con ass

The most basic phone you can buy here is about 1500 pesos, so she is not being extravagant. However, at that price it is very possibly reconditioned.

Top-up (called 'Load' here) is available at different levels, from 20 pesos up to 500 pesos. Usually, one SMS to UK is 15 pesos, but it depends on the company.

If you want to enable her to send messages cheaply, then get yourself a Philippines SIM from the callingnow website - then she cand send you an sms for 1 peso.

How can you tell whether she's a con artist? ... Find someone who knows her, or take a holiday in Philippines, and get to meet her in person.

[simplelife]

QUOTE=mavid;105565]Don't rush it. Take time to get to know her more.[/QUOTE]

:iagree:

Goodluck to you.

[KARATEKA]

Yes i will not rush it but i am ready to make the break what things should you look out for A CON girl i really hope she is not :)

[vbkelly]

Hi People :):),

Well this may sound abit odd but here goes.

I have been talking to a girl from the philippines for about a week now and she seem's really understanding she is very cute too , we have been chatting on msn and emails and the phone. But she says she loves me but we have never met and then i think is it just about her wanting to love my cash then she was telling about how much a item cost it was about 13,000,00 pesos about £20 GBP then i asked her if she wanted me to buy but she said no as she said that she don't care about money now this was a item that she would like to own , so maybe she is not seeking to love my CASH .



NOW the PROBLEM !!!
I am with somebody at the moment but not happy for many reason's and i would like to make a new start she said you would like to marry me and start a family this sound so nice i just don't know if i should take a risk as you hear many things with asian girls just being with a guy for cash.

sounds a bit fishy to me you just meet her about a week and then she fell in love with you straight away and she asked you to marry her hmmmmmmmmm :REGamblMoney01HL1::REGamblMoney01HL1::REGamblMoney01HL1: not good mate

[jackmac452]

Hi Karateka...don't give up mate..YOU CAN find a lovely filipino lady online...I did and now I'm happy to be married to the best girl in the world...they are out there......as usual, you just have to sort the wheat from the chaff. My mussus knew that me being a Scotsman..she would never get money out of me... hehehehe.. but honestly..she has never asked me for any !!!! but I do send her it now for Junior and herself...because thats my obligation. And the bit about being Honest and faithfull......yes.by gum..they are..Go for it my friend...but its best just not to put just one iron in the fire......

[joebloggs]

what things should you look out for A CON girl i really hope she is not :)

one that asks you for 13,000php for a phone, when you've only just started chatting to her..

she should not ask you for money at all, you've only known her a week, but scammers will try to hook you in, ask for small amounts, and the amount will probably increase to pay for bills, hospital treatment, having no money after being mugged etc... not just in the phils. scammers and con people everywhere, men and women..

take it easy as some have said, see if there are any changes in your relationship with her, not texting or chatting much, starts hinting she needs money, not as affectionate etc..

but good luck :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[PeterB]

she should not ask you for money at all

As I understand it, this girl has refused his money. However, if this was brought up as a hint, then I agree that caution is necessary.

I chatted to one lady who never asked for money but often mentioned not having received her pay, and needing to get her children back from her sister's for the start of the new school semester.

[joebloggs]

As I understand it, this girl has refused his money. However, if this was brought up as a hint, then I agree that caution is necessary.

I chatted to one lady who never asked for money but often mentioned not having received her pay, and needing to get her children back from her sister's for the start of the new school semester.

yes true, and not asking for money at all for weeks or months, different ways of hooking you in, getting your trust..

[somebody]

Thai to uk calls are much cheaper from what i know.

Dont send any money unless YOU want to, after all its your money.

If you had just met a lady in the UK, and she asked for money in most situations you would say no and think hang on.

The scams can be very slick so be careful, i know our phill members will not be offended as they know the poverty in Phill can turn some peoples heads to bad deeds.

Take some time talking (weeks/months) to her if she did need a phone find out what the cheapest one is possible as Peterb says like i the UK a very cheap one can be found. If she simply is desperate to have a phone she will not care and be grateful.
Same in the UK or Phill many a time someone i know brit or phill has been desperate for a phone or some item and if you offer them one even if not ideal they will be grateful.

The Wife and I look for cheap phones in the UK in exchange shops (the ones with marks and whatnot) off of friends from my company etc.Those in phill who have better things to spend money on than a phone. Children, food, water, electricty etc are grateful and make the best of them. A cover or a clever paint job even and it looks as good as new.

[KARATEKA]

She never talk about many it's me that's ask how much is This N That maybe she ment 1300 for the phone it was 3 am UK Time when she said lol, She don't seem to want to marry now but it's on her list to

Find Nice guy
marry
have a family

But she spends about 20 pesos to travel to the internet cafe then pays to use the net sometimes twice a day but she as never ask as of yet. but sas ay you talk to her family about me and they can't wait to meet me .

[aromulus]

talk to her family about me and they can't wait to meet me .

You are dooooooooooooooomed...!!!!!:omg:

[somebody]

She never talk about many it's me that's ask how much is This N That maybe she ment 1300 for the phone it was 3 am UK Time when she said lol, She don't seem to want to marry now but it's on her list to

Find Nice guy
marry
have a family

But she spends about 20 pesos to travel to the internet cafe then pays to use the net sometimes twice a day but she as never ask as of yet. but sas ay you talk to her family about me and they can't wait to meet me .

As you say may just be conversation and nothing to worry about. I could tell you i want to buy a new telly but doesn't mean either of us think you will pay for it.

Phills even young metro ladies on the whole are very traditonal in their ways and think dating leads to marriage not just something to do that day. So it is important to bear in mind.

[KARATEKA]

What was ment by i am doooooomed !!!! lol, by aromulus ???

But thanks for your reply's

[joebloggs]

many on here send money monthly back to the phils to support her family, some have gone even further, gave/loaned money to start a business, buy a home for her parents , etc..

doms just warning you, you may need deep pockets if it starts to get out of control, but some people don't send anything, or there is no need to, but if you do start sending money keep to a limit and explain to her why, that is all you can afford, not unless you can afford to help them out with what they need :rolleyes:

[cheesewiz]

why look far im here in UK single lol just joking:D im dating someone now:cwm12::BouncyHappy::Hellooo:

anyway, as people said here filipina is one of the best or may be the best wife in the world if you find the right one. My simple advice is just keep on chatting for a few months and by doing it you will know her bits by bits then asking her about her backgrounds and her family etc. Of course try to read about the Philippines it helps too I think.

Again, don't rush true love waits patiently. Good luck hope you find the happiness you are looking for.

[winner]

1 week chating and in love get your head out the clouds mate a ture filipino not say that thay to shy just have fun till you get a lot of experience chating to girls on line there a lot of ture one out there

[KARATEKA]

Well thank's to all of you as you seem sound and very much know what you are on about !!!. Yes there would be limit's on the help i give to her family if we get together for many reason's the main i work hard for my cash and i am not a walking cash point ,

But Big Thank's to you All :smileybigtmouth::smileybigtmouth::smileybigtmouth:

[kermit123]

Hi People :):),

Well this may sound abit odd but here goes.

I have been talking to a girl from the philippines for about a week now and she seem's really understanding she is very cute too , we have been chatting on msn and emails and the phone. But she says she loves me but we have never met and then i think is it just about her wanting to love my cash then she was telling about how much a item cost it was about 13,000,00 pesos about £20 GBP then i asked her if she wanted me to buy but she said no as she said that she don't care about money now this was a item that she would like to own , so maybe she is not seeking to love my CASH .



NOW the PROBLEM !!!
I am with somebody at the moment but not happy for many reason's and i would like to make a new start she said you would like to marry me and start a family this sound so nice i just don't know if i should take a risk as you hear many things with asian girls just being with a guy for cash. hi you might be just going throuth a bad spot with the girl your with at moment .And maybe your looking for a easy way out of it.And this girl has come along at right time have you explained to this new girl you have a girl at moment and your going thru a bad spot at moment.(or you playing the both of them lol seeing which one is best for you lol)13,000 php is about 150 pounds not 20 pounds, 20 pounds is about 2,500 php but you can give me 13,000 php for 20 pounds lol :) if you think 150 php here is days pay (were i am in philippines) then money is very very important you really have to meet this girl she might be a great girl . i meet my lady on line after a week i came here and meet here and i have been here with her 4 years now really hard on pc to get to now person. this is only my oppion gaz/maybs:)

[Toyang]

All I can say is careful and be careful. These days it is difficult to find someone whose real and pure heart.
More gold diggers around. :Hellooo:
By the way, can I ask you question?
Do you own a beatle car? How many houses do you have? How many digits your annual income? And lastly, do you fancy buying a lady a diamonds?:Hellooo:
Just stay cool Karateka, Theres still more Beautiful and decent Filipina around, just be smart to know whose genuine or not. Goodluck.

[Mrs.JMajor]

All I can say is careful and be careful. These days it is difficult to find someone whose real and pure heart.
More gold diggers around. :Hellooo:
.
pssshh ! you might offend some filipina around :icon_lol:


By the way, can I ask you question?
Do you own a beatle car? How many houses do you have? How many digits your annual income? And lastly, do you fancy buying a lady a diamonds?:Hellooo:
.
you also have strong sense of humor here Toyang :xxgrinning--00xx3::Cuckoo:


Just stay cool Karateka, Theres still more Beautiful and decent Filipina around, just be smart to know whose genuine or not. Goodluck.

Lastly,absolutely right :xxgrinning--00xx3::rolleyes::)

[Toyang]

pssshh ! you might offend some filipina around :icon_lol:
you also have strong sense of humor here Toyang :xxgrinning--00xx3::Cuckoo:
Lastly,absolutely right :xxgrinning--00xx3::rolleyes::)




Thanks Mrs. JMajor. :xxgrinning--00xx3:
That post can only be offensive for human without brain. :icon_lol: .
We are now in the 21st Century, if one has no sense of humour, she or he should be better bump his/her head :Brick:against the Hadrians Wall.
If someone wants to marry a British national, first tip I can give is learn to have a good sense of humour. Otherwise she/ he will have a hard time to cope with other people. But if she/ he lives 700miles from the civilization then it does not matter. :icon_lol::icon_lol:

[aromulus]

Well thank's to all of you as you seem sound and very much know what you are on about !!!. Yes there would be limit's on the help i give to her family if we get together for many reason's the main i work hard for my cash and i am not a walking cash point ,

But Big Thank's to you All :smileybigtmouth::smileybigtmouth::smileybigtmouth:

The best insight on the Philippines you can find anywhere online is not far away.

http://www.british-filipino.com/

If you spend some time reading Peter's website, you will find that it is a mine of information and will prepare you on what to expect, if and when you decide to travel to the Philippines to meet the girl.

Infact, when my turn came, I found it invaluable help.

I don't recommend a plan "B"...... or "C"......:NoNo:

Good luck.

[ginapeterb]

What do they say ? what's that phrase they always start with ?

I no want money from you....big boy !

British man nice man....better than American man....German man no good, British man very good man...nice skin..like you have, I no want your money, just think you very good man for me...yes...good man, maybe.

You see big boy...I have this problem, right now...thing very hard for me...very hard sa Pilipinas, you see, my brother having hard time here...he went out last week on his motorcycle, and bump into a police car, they say he have to pay for damage, at time, he was on way to hospital to visit my sick Lola, sick Lola so bad, need lot of peso for hospital bill, then caribou fell sick and need vet treatment now.

Brother motor cycle have bust tyre, and cousin nonoy cannot pay school fee, need pencils, and pens, books, text book and ruck sack for school, new uniform and Nokia N96 cellphone, N96 cheapest one here in cell phone shop, only P30,000 sorry, no contract phone here, just PAYG, Police came yesterday, say my brother have to pay express fees for damage to police unit, then cannot visit my sick lola at hospital, need P5000.00 for this, or have to go to Jaol.

Medical bills at hospital have to be paid, only P20,000 or Sick lola cannot come out, will not release her until bills paid.

You seem nice man, British man very good man, very generous man, American man stingy, German man kuripot, no good, please come on yahoo tomorrow, its hard for me right now sa Pilipinas, cannot get to internet cafe, cost too much, need money for internet, but try best to get here, if not see me, because we have no money this week for cafe.

Will try my best, sorry if not there, but thing is hard here with us, typhoon blow out roof off, and it cost so much to fix, maybe P20,000 I have much problems here as you can see, but you seem nice man, please, I don't want your money, just want you to understand our situation here in Philipppines.


AND A PARTRIDGE IN A PEAR TREE !

[mavid]

lol...indeed Peter

[xebec]

All the advice so far offered is good.

I have spent a lot of time on MSN and Yahoo in the last 10 - 12 years. The warning signals seem to be declarations of love and requests for money - coupled with tales of woe - within a few minutes of chatting. I have often gone along with those stories simply to see what they would say but with never any intention of sending money. It is not only Filipino women who do this - just that there are a lot of them online.

My advice would be to chat to a lot of women online. Even frequent the Filipino rooms on Yahoo or look for those who appear to be Filipino in the UK ones. You will soon discover those who you enjoy chatting to and want to chat to some more.

My now wife and myself chatted for a couple of years until we talked seriously about marriage. And at no stage did she ask me for any money or other material support.

Online chat is fraught with deceit - you can describe yourself as single, never married, and in reality have several marriages behind you.

If you chat to the "one" and want to meet her then a lot of trust is still involved in making that 7000 mile journey...........But as most members here will testify the patience and care and time is very much worthwhile.

[PeterB]

Karateka, it might still be useful or, at least, interesting to know where your girl comes from!

The first time I offered to send money to Ruby was when she was making hotel and car bookings in preparation for my first visit, but she refused. However, I did end up paying off some considerable Utang during the visit. In addition to the arrangements for my visit, she had been borrowing money in order to pay for time at the Internet Cafe and I knew that she wasn't well paid!

[Piamed]

NOW the PROBLEM !!!
I am with somebody at the moment but not happy for many reason's and i would like to make a new start she said you would like to marry me and start a family this sound so nice i just don't know if i should take a risk as you hear many things with asian girls just being with a guy for cash.

For every supposed 'golddigger' out there, there is a selfish and advantage-taking Westerner. It works both ways i think.

Additionally, a wife is not just for Christmas, as the old advert used to declare. It occurs to me from what you have said that you have put less research, planning and consideration into this situation than you would put into pursuing a new job or the purchasing of a house.

I don't think you should be talking relationships with one person when you are not truly free to pursue it. The grass is not always greener also.

Take time to evaluate the situation from your own perspective but more importantly from the perspective of the life you might be responsible for. That is love, n'est pa! And think about the risk she is taking, and presumably without knowing the full picture on your side.

Good luck mate!

[Plonker]

I think we're all following what we see in the movies/tv and have given us preconceptions about meeting far east asian girls. And to some degree its true in developing asian countries. But thats only a minority of girls after money and thus giving all the girls a bad name if money is mentioned early on. Its no different than your mates or family talking about their money problems and asking you for help.

We all know Philippines is a developing country, and we know at the back of our minds that money is going to be a topic. I dont know what any other guys are like, but I like paying for everything when we was getting married in Manila. She made her efforts too, like buying inexspensive things such as ice cream, bottled water here and there etc. I already knew she doesn't have much money.

If you've gotten far as being boy friend/girl friend then why not spend some money on her. £100 - £200 is peanuts, thats like a days work for us boys. If there is any doubt or you feel uncomfortable with her then move on, there are plenty of other nice girls out there in the Philippines.

When me and my wife first started she already said she wanted to marry me with in weeks of knowing me and I said lets do it. Though to be honest we didn't really talk about money at all. Only after we got married a few months ago we started to talk about money, ie sending some back to her family. Which is no different than giving some money to your gran, or kids.

Well your looking for a new start, going to Philippines will open your eyes. I've travelled the world and thought I saw everything until I went to Philippines to get married. Its one big adventure which never stops.

[Piamed]

But thats only a minority of girls after money and thus giving all the girls a bad name if money is mentioned early on. Its no different than your mates or family talking about their money problems and asking you for help.


If you've gotten far as being boy friend/girl friend then why not spend some money on her. £100 - £200 is peanuts, thats like a days work for us boys. If there is any doubt or you feel uncomfortable with her then move on, there are plenty of other nice girls out there in the Philippines.

...sending some back to her family. Which is no different than giving some money to your gran, or kids.
I agree :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[English Rose]

I can't imagine any woman saying, yes please buy it for me. We don't work that way. You have to read between the lines!

[gemini63]

I can't imagine any woman saying, yes please buy it for me. We don't work that way. You have to read between the lines!

Hello englishrose..its one of our culture or used to... that its the man who will support the woman especially if its his wife already..During dates of being bf/gf relationship, its usuall for us that its the man who will pay for the cost or expenses.Its the practice usually in phil.Because of that practice,,seems we filipina felt that if we spent for a man, wr downgrading our dignity of being a woman. Unlike here in uk as what i knew..its the woman..even cost of the wedding.So really, its one of the culture difference we have had...Also one culture we have had is that, the income of the husband goes to the wife and its the wife will do the budget...IN the case of working wife,,it depends on her now if she will help the expenses incurred for the family as help for her husband.But she has the right just to keep it...It should be the husband who will earn for the living, and its the wife who will take care of the husband.Thats why, we filipinas are bound really to take care of our husband as the head of the family,,and we wifes are the light...He..he..So its not easy if the husband has no job in phil..

[Toyang]

Hello englishrose..its one of our culture or used to... that its the man who will support the woman especially if its his wife already..During dates of being bf/gf relationship, its usuall for us that its the man who will pay for the cost or expenses.Its the practice usually in phil.Because of that practice,,seems we filipina felt that if we spent for a man, wr downgrading our dignity of being a woman. Unlike here in uk as what i knew..its the woman..even cost of the wedding.So really, its one of the culture difference we have had...Also one culture we have had is that, the income of the husband goes to the wife and its the wife will do the budget...IN the case of working wife,,it depends on her now if she will help the expenses incurred for the family as help for her husband.But she has the right just to keep it...It should be the husband who will earn for the living, and its the wife who will take care of the husband.Thats why, we filipinas are bound really to take care of our husband as the head of the family,,and we wifes are the light...He..he..So its not easy if the husband has no job in phil..

I agree.

and if the husband will not surrender his income to his wife , he will be outside the kulambo :icon_lol::icon_lol: means he cant sleep with her or he have to sleep on the sofa. :icon_lol: