View Full Version : help and advice pls.
nids123
10th March 2009, 02:39
hi good day to all of u here,i thought i wont post like this here,my problem now is my husband sounds he wanna gv up on me waiting for me in uk. we talk this morning oline and we dont well his upsit of something and told me to canceel my visa coz it wont happened and he have enough of me waiting,he said just go on with ky life and he go on of his life,he told me to sell the unit he purchase here and he said sell everything here.guys i really dont understand y my husband act this wayim so hurt ive done nothing wrong here all i do is work to sopport myself here and wait till i got my visa release,ispend to much preasures hurts for bieng part from him its bee 6 months already sence we been part the communication only we have is tx and internet.i dont expect this way our love story its just gonna end lkike this,the other day we have plann that we keep the unit for rent while we r there in uk and work together to save for our future and save money to buy for another hojuse after 5 years.guys i odnt know what to do i dont wanna lose him god knows how much i love him,his my life my everything.hope i could get help from all of u here.:Brick::Help1::bigcry::bigcry::bigcry:
Shayla
10th March 2009, 02:52
hi good day to all of u here,i thought i wont post like this here,my problem now is my husband sounds he wanna gv up on me waiting for me in uk. we talk this morning oline and we dont well his upsit of something and told me to canceel my visa coz it wont happened and he have enough of me waiting,he said just go on with ky life and he go on of his life,he told me to sell the unit he purchase here and he said sell everything here.guys i really dont understand y my husband act this wayim so hurt ive done nothing wrong here all i do is work to sopport myself here and wait till i got my visa release,ispend to much preasures hurts for bieng part from him its bee 6 months already sence we been part the communication only we have is tx and internet.i dont expect this way our love story its just gonna end lkike this,the other day we have plann that we keep the unit for rent while we r there in uk and work together to save for our future and save money to buy for another hojuse after 5 years.guys i odnt know what to do i dont wanna lose him god knows how much i love him,his my life my everything.hope i could get help from all of u here.:Brick::Help1::bigcry::bigcry::bigcry:
Oh Ate Nids I never expect to hear this bad news from you!..:doh:bigcry::doh
I think you're both stressed with your visa.. Get some rest the both of you and be patient of waiting till the visa is ready..
To fight is normal but don't ever let him give up on you.. As you've said you never done nothing wrong which will upset him so why will he do that?.. Best not to pester him about your visa coz maybe that's the reason why he told you that his gonna cancel it.. I already told you that it will come in God's perfect time.. I waited more than what you waited right now but my husband and I never ever give up...
To give up is the hardest part we can't ever do.
Anyway I wish you luck and may you find peace and I pray you and your husband will be fine the next day and please try to fix the problem so in the end you will both be happy.
GOD BLESS YOU!
nids123
10th March 2009, 03:05
hi shay thank you so much for the advice just dont know where to turn too,im so hurt at the moment its really so hurt me.everytime we talk online he always ask about my visa when is gonna be here i always said i cant tell coz the eco r the the one who decide when they want to release it,and i keep going to embassy manila coz i live near here still the people there cant answer me.he is so upsit for my answer coz i dont know what to say coz the people at embassy dont answer me too.ur lucky that ur husband never gv up waiting for u,mine i just feels im just the one who keep the waitig and not giving up,all i want is to be him and be happy to be with him for the rest of my life i dont ask for anything just him his love.
Florge
10th March 2009, 03:13
i hope everything will be sorted out soon... i have to agree with shay that maybe you're both stressed about it... and i know he's not going to give up on your marriage and love just because you visa hasn't arrived yet... doesn't make sense.. so keep praying and all will be well in God's grace.
pennybarry
10th March 2009, 07:41
hi good day to all of u here,i thought i wont post like this here,my problem now is my husband sounds he wanna gv up on me waiting for me in uk. we talk this morning oline and we dont well his upsit of something and told me to canceel my visa coz it wont happened and he have enough of me waiting,he said just go on with ky life and he go on of his life,he told me to sell the unit he purchase here and he said sell everything here.guys i really dont understand y my husband act this wayim so hurt ive done nothing wrong here all i do is work to sopport myself here and wait till i got my visa release,ispend to much preasures hurts for bieng part from him its bee 6 months already sence we been part the communication only we have is tx and internet.i dont expect this way our love story its just gonna end lkike this,the other day we have plann that we keep the unit for rent while we r there in uk and work together to save for our future and save money to buy for another hojuse after 5 years.guys i odnt know what to do i dont wanna lose him god knows how much i love him,his my life my everything.hope i could get help from all of u here.:Brick::Help1::bigcry::bigcry::bigcry:
It's a part of long waiting dear. Just give him space and understand his situation. Waiting drives us crazy. To tell you frankly, my hubby was almost give up before because my visa was refused and he filed an appeal. It was a long wait as my documents submitted at Home Office was lost inside their office. We waited for 2 years for the process:Brick:. I received a letter from UK home office that my visa was approved, but still the embassy in Manila was still holding my passport due to unknown reason. After two weeks, I started to send FAX to them, more fax and calls but still I received nothing. UNtil, I went to the embassy knock their door:cwm23: and the next few days, I got it.
The long wait was horrible but I just kept calm and busy with my shop, hubby that time was not calm, he felt bad against how my papers lost and how slowly the processing.
I was still lucky I won two times in a raffle which is free tour to europe. That was lovely we had romantic dates in Holland,Germany,Belgium and France. I think we deserve that as we really inlove.:D
So cheer up, don't loose hope, he'll comeback to your arms later:xxgrinning--00xx3:
nids123
10th March 2009, 11:02
thank you guys for all the positive result,i just feel i dont know where to go i feels so lost,its really hard to have a long distance relationship,i never gv up on him ill fiegth for his love.i do hope that he will come back to me i always pray hard to have him forever. and i hope that my visa will get here soon so he will stop blaming me arguing with me about my visa.i love him so much dont wanna gv him up just like that.again thank you so much for all of u here.
thejarvs
10th March 2009, 11:28
I think the best thing you can do is to pray and be strong. don't let your stress get over you. you need to be strong for your weak honey at the moment. like what the others say give him a little space and when you both more relax then you can tell him that its not worth giving up everything just because you are both getting frustrated of waiting about your visa.
Things like this is just a trial for relationship. There'll be ups and down all the time, the key to get through it is to support each other or to support the one that is getting weak.
> Mrsjarv
As Cristina says the proccess is a very bumpy road, as a man I know that sometimes we keep things from you and try to deal with issues ourselves thinking it will save you from the stress. I'm sure he will snap out of it when he has a moment to settle his mind.
Hope all goes ok, stay strong and positive it's the only way :)
>Mrjarv
nids123
10th March 2009, 16:00
hi guys thank for all the positives words here for me,im fine now and feel better he just tx me that i have not too worry he is just so strees out for the things everythings seems nothing happen he said love me so much.thank u guys for all te prayers here.im back in my normal life now.
Shayla
10th March 2009, 16:04
hi guys thank for all the positives words here for me,im fine now and feel better he just tx me that i have not too worry he is just so strees out for the things everythings seems nothing happen he said love me so much.thank u guys for all te prayers here.im back in my normal life now.
Thank God for that.. Now yous can be happy again.. Just wait a little and it will come to you..Be more optimistic too and don't stress yourself again!..Okay?..
God bless us all..
nids123
10th March 2009, 16:12
thank you bunso for ur kind words yes im so happy now and no more strees.im not worried for my visa coz i know i wil have it,he is more worried stress than i am he is afraid and think if my visa will get refuse,i always told him that im so comfedent that i will be ok.im the one who always says patients and faith,he is 50 years old but i feels im more older than him already the stress he always gv me.anyway thank you shay ur very sopportive.goodluck to u.
nids123
10th March 2009, 16:14
to pennyberry thanks a lot for the advice and positive wish for me, its help me a lot and help me calm of what i feels.
nids123
10th March 2009, 16:16
hi florge thank you so much for the wish and the advice u gv me its really help me not to woory to much.
nids123
10th March 2009, 16:18
hi thejarvs thank you s much for the kind words and the advice you gv me its help me stop crying and calm and relax myself for all of u here.
Shayla
10th March 2009, 16:27
thank you bunso for ur kind words yes im so happy now and no more strees.im not worried for my visa coz i know i wil have it,he is more worried stress than i am he is afraid and think if my visa will get refuse,i always told him that im so comfedent that i will be ok.im the one who always says patients and faith,he is 50 years old but i feels im more older than him already the stress he always gv me.anyway thank you shay ur very sopportive.goodluck to u.
You're very much welcome Ate Nids,stay happily in love!..:cwm38::cwm38::cwm38:
Take care!
Mrs.JMajor
10th March 2009, 16:51
hi nids,sorry to hear that,but yes wating for the visa really can make you stressed,we also have been there in arguement,the thing is he is the one whos being strong and he keep saying "we are almost there,dont give up" which is very true just few steps and you will have it,how long you been waiting anyway,and did he contact you already or chat to you (your hubby)
best of luck nids,be strong
nids123
10th March 2009, 17:04
hi mrsmajor yes he tx me and talk to me online already tonyt here at 6 pm here which is 10 am there.he tx me he said sorry he is just so stress out for the things that seems everything nothing happen,everytime he ask my visa he is so piss off.ive just waited for 6 weeks,he always ask me what the embassy say i said they dont answer me they always says its the same status still at the embassy. he is so scared worried.he makes me so stress coz of his atitude instead he gv me comport hes pacnicking.anyway thank ur consern.
Piamed
10th March 2009, 17:24
Sorry to hear how things have been recently. Waiting is certainly hard. Some people express their feelings in that way. He just misses you and is frusrtaed with how things are progressing. We've all been there in your position of waiting before, so rest assured all will be well in time.
scott&ligaya
10th March 2009, 18:03
Hi Nids123,
does your husband use this forum? where does he live? maybe one of us regulars here who have been through this situation can get with him, have a beer or a coffee and chat things through. It might help him.
thejarvs
10th March 2009, 19:21
good to know that you and your honey are okei now.Now all you need to do is relax and wait for your visa. If i wasn't mistaken mine took 2 months. i applied for my visa on our first wedding anniversary and i got my visa on my birth day(wonderful gift wasn't). through that month i was waiting, i never heard from the visa people as well but its worth waiting.
Good luck :)
tiN
10th March 2009, 19:49
Waiting is really a pain:doh:doh But you just need to relax and not to think about it too much.:)
Goodluck on your application:Hellooo:
nids123
11th March 2009, 00:43
hi scott&ligaya my husband is from warwishire, and his not a memeber of this forum too.ye i know guys that he miss me so much i understand him.its just soemtimes he purse me to answwer his questions about the visa,he wants me to say something if somebody from the embassy tell me when i have my visa and always explain to him that the people at embassy wont tell me coz only the eco knows when they want to release it. and he dosent like my answer.well i hope that i will have my visa soon so as the other here its so streesful for me i dont mind waiting its my usband im worried about i just hope that he can wait for me.i know the visa is in the way.
nids123
11th March 2009, 00:47
hi piamed,eveything is ok now so far he just tx me last nyt telling me i dont have to be worry of what he said he is just so piss off of things that nothing happen.coz he thinks too much and scared and worried if i will have my visa realese he is so worried more than i am.but now we r ok again,thank you oll of u here for the concern its really good that i join this forum its helps me a lot to cope up the stress the waiting time.
Jay&Zobel
11th March 2009, 01:40
Hi Nids123,
does your husband use this forum? where does he live? maybe one of us regulars here who have been through this situation can get with him, have a beer or a coffee and chat things through. It might help him.
Hi Nids,
Patience is a virtue!! But that's the fun of it: LONG WAITING then LIFETIME HAPPINESS...
Always remember: In every dark cloud, there is a bright sunshine behind it. Just keep your head up and SMILE...
With Scott&Ligaya's reply, think it is best if your husband will be a member of this forum too... This is like our "REFUGE" hehehehe... :icon_lol::icon_lol::D...
People with similar situations tend to help themselves by comparing notes and giving advices...
For couples who are now together due to successful visa applications: they are so willing to give their opinions, views and advices --->>> (as they were like you: who have HOPED :), LOST HOPED:bigcry::bigcry:, THEN hoped again :BouncyHappy::BouncyHappy::cwm12:. So, they are just repaying back what they have learnt, by: "PAYING IT FORWARD" TO NEWBIES)
CHEERS NIDS!
Florge
11th March 2009, 07:05
hi mrsmajor yes he tx me and talk to me online already tonyt here at 6 pm here which is 10 am there.he tx me he said sorry he is just so stress out for the things that seems everything nothing happen,everytime he ask my visa he is so piss off.ive just waited for 6 weeks,he always ask me what the embassy say i said they dont answer me they always says its the same status still at the embassy. he is so scared worried.he makes me so stress coz of his atitude instead he gv me comport hes pacnicking.anyway thank ur consern.
See! he didn't mean what he said so no reason to worry... what I'm getting is he's just sooooo excited to have you around that's why he got pissed off with knowing that you can't be with him now.. as in now na. That's how much he misses you... uuuuuuuyyyyyyyyyy........
Pepe n Pilar
11th March 2009, 10:12
Hi Nids123,
Yes long wait is really stressful. I've been back in the Phils and waited for my papers well not the visa but still that was a long wait of 13 months. There were times that he's pissed off by the system in the Phils but i tell him just be patient and when i am the one that is losing hope he will be the one to comfort me. It's good to know your fiance said sorry and no reason to worry about. He really loves you and just can't wait to be with you.
Best of luck.....:)
adam&chryss
11th March 2009, 10:29
hi nids!
glad to hear that you are ok now :)
soon you'll have news from ur visa application... goodluck!
always think positive, ur visa will be approved :xxgrinning--00xx3:
scott&ligaya
11th March 2009, 12:04
Hi Nids1123,
good to hear things are calming down, there are a few regulars on here from around Warickshire depending upon where exactly he is. Ian Busby is in Coventry and I am in birminghmam for example. I would absolutely reccomend that he join this forum and again I am happy to meet up with him for a coffee or a beer. My wife and baby are home on holiday right now and I miss them just after a few weeks and get annoyed when I get "out of coverage area" message on her phone (poor signal at the farm). I am also sitting around at home preparing for my next assignment and have lots of time on my hands so let your husband know about this site and PM his mobile if he wants to meet up
This forum is a great support to us all even when we already have our princesses here in the UK
Scott
nids123
11th March 2009, 14:07
o thank you scott i will tell him about the site.he is from coventry its good to know that from here has from my husband pls.i can gv u his mobile but i will ask him first.he needs someone to expalin y the system here in phil is very law.coz he thinks i dont wanna go there in uk he thinks that i just trying to please him i said if u want me there more me i wanna be there coz i love him tobits i have nothing to ask for just his love.thank you guys for all the sopport with me here its keeps me go on and hope that i will see my hubby soon.god knows how much i love him.
nids123
11th March 2009, 14:09
hi adam&chryss thank you so much for the sopport.its helps me a lot to make me more patient and hope to see my hubby soon.
IainBusby
11th March 2009, 14:31
Hi Nids1123,
good to hear things are calming down, there are a few regulars on here from around Warickshire depending upon where exactly he is. Ian Busby is in Coventry and I am in birminghmam for example. I would absolutely reccomend that he join this forum and again I am happy to meet up with him for a coffee or a beer. My wife and baby are home on holiday right now and I miss them just after a few weeks and get annoyed when I get "out of coverage area" message on her phone (poor signal at the farm). I am also sitting around at home preparing for my next assignment and have lots of time on my hands so let your husband know about this site and PM his mobile if he wants to meet up
This forum is a great support to us all even when we already have our princesses here in the UK
Scott
That's right, I'm here in Coventry, as is my wife Louella, VBKelly, Rob & Ann and LizSteve. There are lots of other Filipinos here in Coventry as well.
Iain.
nids123
12th March 2009, 12:51
hi shay any news bout ur visa yet?hope to hear from urs applications soon.
Shayla
12th March 2009, 13:22
hi shay any news bout ur visa yet?hope to hear from urs applications soon.
Hey Ate Nids,same as usual there's no new updates yet.I will inform you soon as I have it that's I always promise.. (",)..How about yours?.. Any new updates too?..:D:D:D
Take care!...Hope your keeping well..x x x
nids123
12th March 2009, 16:08
same as usual wla pa rin,my husband is always asking my visa everytime we talk online he is so protrated of not sienf me.im so stress ful of his atitude but its ok i unerstand him i love him tobits.i just hope that we will get our visa soon keep our fingers cross
beaubrummie
13th March 2009, 03:33
Hi nids I have to agree with our friends on the forum the visa process is a long & lonely one your husband needs to talk to some of us who have been through it .There is a big anglo-filipino community in coventry and surrounding areas also local pinoy shops where he could go and talk but joining this forum would be the best way I like scott & ligaya am also from birmingham about half an hours drive from coventry. be patiant your time will come. your husband can contact me via pinoy foods birmingham tell him to ask for kalbo's fone No
Shayla
13th March 2009, 11:12
same as usual wla pa rin,my husband is always asking my visa everytime we talk online he is so protrated of not sienf me.im so stress ful of his atitude but its ok i unerstand him i love him tobits.i just hope that we will get our visa soon keep our fingers cross
Good eve Te!
How long since you lodged your visa application?
That's normal to be frustrated when it comes to visa waiting but it will be worthy in the end that's I'm sure so please have more patience the both of you..We will be given all a good reward soon which is our positive results..Just be more positive and keep smiling so yous won't get wrinkles..hehe..
nids123
13th March 2009, 11:26
Hi ive check my visa applications on tract ur applications its says here that your applications is ready for collections please visit the uk visa apllication center where u submitted your visa application to collect the same.what is this means guys its mean my visa is ready ti collect?im going to embassy on monday to collect it. thank u guys for everything shay bunso tnax to u and everybody here wish u luck all of u here.
Shayla
13th March 2009, 11:49
Hi ive check my visa applications on tract ur applications its says here that your applications is ready for collections please visit the uk visa apllication center where u submitted your visa application to collect the same.what is this means guys its mean my visa is ready ti collect?im going to embassy on monday to collect it. thank u guys for everything shay bunso tnax to u and everybody here wish u luck all of u here.
Hi Ate Nids,it means you need to go to the VFS and get ur visa result..Good luck!
CONGRATULATIONS IN ADVANCE!
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