ginapeterb
4th November 2004, 14:24
The Frustrations of Immigration separation.
I think most of you by know have already met our Brit-Phil couple John and Maribel, you know John had a great time in the Philippines, when he went down to Mindanao, he really did fall for Maribel, I mean she is everything he ever wanted in a woman, she is sweet, loving, caring, attentive, and he had the best 3 weeks of his life, everything was just perfect !
Maribel feels great too, she tells everyone about John, she burns peoples ears, about her John, and in a couple of weeks she will be flying for the first time out of the country, and to a new life with John, in his country, she can’t wait and is counting the days, and of course she knows that John has to “Fix” her papers so it should not be too much of a problem, after all its only a couple of forms isn’t it ?
After going through this myself, and I still am today, I would like to help any other couples, who experience the frustrations of this story, because in truth John and Maribel are no different to any other Brit-Phil couple that travel down this road.
Keith and myself seem to be deluged by frequently asked questions that tend to say this “How long will it be before we can be together, after we get married, or get engaged”
Its good that perhaps Keith and myself can write about this, for one thing Keith is already settled in UK with his wife, unlike him, I am still going through the processes of John and Maribels story, so having different insights into this can be help all of us to appreciate the time lines and immigration processes.
There do seem to be defining stages in this whole process, and some I have experienced already, and some are yet to come, but perhaps I can set out the defining stages of the process as I see them.
1. Unfounded Optimism
John has returned to UK now and is back in his house in Hungerford, he is a bit shell shocked, after all, he hit it off so well with Maribel, he is in love with her, and its been 24 hours and he is in agony, he misses her like crazy, he has been on the net for 2 hours already, he has called her for a quick chat on her mobile, he is not back at work yet, since its Sunday, and he is back in the office on Monday morning, when he arrived back at Heathrow, he looked out of the window and saw the weather, it’s the usual British weather, freezing bloody cold and the goods rarely turn up !
He walked down the concourse to get his bags, those clowns in the baggage handling department have dumped his bags on the carousel, the wheels are broken off, but its 7.00am in the morning and he cant be bothered to complain, then he gets the bus round to the long term car park, and cant remember where he left his car, takes him about 30 minutes to find it, when he does get there, the battery is flat, and he has to get the car park people to start him, he is not a happy chappy.
This was only day 1 when he arrives back at the house there is so much mail on the doorstep that he can barely get through the door, and to top it all, the credit card bill is already on the doorstep, sounds familiar doesn’t it ? Monday was a crap day, no one is too much interested in his great 3 week junket to the Philippines, not much interest in seeing his digital photos, he bumps off from work at around 3.30pm and shoots home for a cup of tea.
John is now looking at the 4 walls of his house, its around 5.30pm, Maribel has long since gone to bed, she cant help him in his hour of need, he is lonely, tired and about as happy to be back in the UK as he is being picked for the Great Britain Olympic toboggan team.
However, John is one of those optimistic guys, so he thinks time to get the forms from the internet for the marriage visa, shouldn’t be too much of a problem, just fill in a quick form and get it off to the Embassy, in a couple of weeks, should be sorted out and he can buy Maribel’s ticket, it wont be long before she arrives at Heathrow, oh its not so bad !!
2. Reality sets in !
John has been back a week now, he is still a little shell shocked, its not much fun watching T.V. at night without Maribel, but he is starting to realize now that both Governments, that is the British Government and the Philippines Government do require some serious paperwork, however John reasons, he has everything that is required, shouldn’t be too much of a problem, fill in a few forms, send it off, and hopefully in a about a couple of weeks, a visa should be issued, Maribel is getting a little frustrated as well, she is missing John, but she is assured by John that he is handling things and she will be coming soon, Maribel, is so excited and goes around letting everyone know in the Barangay that soon she is leaving for UK, and a new life.
3. Confusion is setting in !
Its been 4 weeks now, and John has filled in all the forms, but then the forms have been sent back, as they do not have the supporting documentation that was asked for, the British Embassy are not very helpful, they just keep sending things back, what is going on ? They keep talking about Evidence of Relationship ? What are they talking about ? I have met her, we are in love, what has it got to do with them, why are they interested in who I want to marry, why should it concern them ? What’s going on over there. Why is it taking so long ?
4. The Resentment Stage.
John has been checking around the net now, has logged into some help sites for Fil-West marriages, has been looking at other peoples, stories, cooler heads have been telling him, that it takes a lot of time, so he starts to feel resentful, What business is it of the UK government to tell him who he can marry, why do they have to take all of this time, when they let all these Asylum seekers in without any problems, then give them free money and a free house, he thinks, What if I can get a tourist visa for her, that should be quicker, then she can come and live with me, other cooler heads tell him not to try that, its too dangerous, and it wont work anyway, but he is now very resentful, he goes to the shopping malls, he and he can pick out other Brit-Phil and Brit-Thai couples, he starts to resent them also, he now starts to think that the Government pen pushers are going out of their way to make sure he and Maribel never get together, they just make things difficult, what can he do now ?
5. The Rebellion stage.
John consults with other people regularly now, Maribel doesn’t know what is happening since, John told her that things would be sorted out, that was 4 months ago, and still he has heard nothing, she has now been given a date for an interview but that is in 4 months time as well, well that’s that then, this is not the way to go, John then writes to his MP, his MP gets the letter, date stamps it, and John doesn’t hear anything about that for 4 weeks as well, when he does get a reply, his MP doesn’t say too much either, apart from the fact that Maribels, application is with the Embassy, and that it is being processed.
He reasons now, that he will get her a student visa or something, maybe get her in the back door, cancel this application and make another one, surely there has to be a better way, time is running away, its been 6 months now, the interview is in about 2 months, how much longer ?
6. The Despair stage.
Its been months now, and John is coming to the end of his tether, something must be wrong, what’s happening, he still hasn’t heard anything from them, nor has Maribel, she still hasn’t had her interview, things just seem to drag on, the separation is killing him, its almost as the whole system is against him, is it because, he has missed something, is it because of his writing, can they understand it ? Has he missed out on a document somewhere ? What is it, when he calls them, they just tell him that his Application is being processed, and they have it, the person who is dealing with it, is only annual leave, and it has to be handled by them on their return, despair is certainly setting in, and is cruel beyond belief.
7. The Zombie stage.
John is vastly becoming a Zombie now, he cant sleep, he cant work, he is having trouble meeting his targets, he spends more time surfing the net now, looking at Filipino internet sites, he begins to doubt himself, he begins to resent all over married couples, he even thinks it would be better to tell Maribel, that things are not moving, and that its not likely she will get her visa, he tells her that maybe they should cool it, and thinks perhaps she would be better off with someone locally, but he loves her, and is just thinking of her, all of these thoughts start eating into his mind.
8. The Euphoric Stage.
Eureka !!. Maribel calls John and tells him that she has been on her interview and the Embassy have called her to tell her to come and collect her entry clearance visa, she can come to the UK when she is ready, apart from attending the CFO seminar, she is ready to fly, out of the blue, John cannot believe it, he is ecstatic, and just cannot believe that it has all come to fruition, it is now nearly 12 months, John picks himself up and goes into the street and shouts YES !!!! Like in a wonderful life, because lets face it, it really is.
Its easy for frustrations to set in about the visa processing period, every case is different, some can go quickly, others more slowly, when you realize that its not personal, and that at some stage, you are going to get a visa, or you are not, the British Embassy statistics are as follows:
92 per cent of all applicants who apply for a Entry Clearance Visa for settlement of a Fiancée or a spouse, are granted their visa.
So then the Odds are definitely in you favour, be patient and Good Luck.
I think most of you by know have already met our Brit-Phil couple John and Maribel, you know John had a great time in the Philippines, when he went down to Mindanao, he really did fall for Maribel, I mean she is everything he ever wanted in a woman, she is sweet, loving, caring, attentive, and he had the best 3 weeks of his life, everything was just perfect !
Maribel feels great too, she tells everyone about John, she burns peoples ears, about her John, and in a couple of weeks she will be flying for the first time out of the country, and to a new life with John, in his country, she can’t wait and is counting the days, and of course she knows that John has to “Fix” her papers so it should not be too much of a problem, after all its only a couple of forms isn’t it ?
After going through this myself, and I still am today, I would like to help any other couples, who experience the frustrations of this story, because in truth John and Maribel are no different to any other Brit-Phil couple that travel down this road.
Keith and myself seem to be deluged by frequently asked questions that tend to say this “How long will it be before we can be together, after we get married, or get engaged”
Its good that perhaps Keith and myself can write about this, for one thing Keith is already settled in UK with his wife, unlike him, I am still going through the processes of John and Maribels story, so having different insights into this can be help all of us to appreciate the time lines and immigration processes.
There do seem to be defining stages in this whole process, and some I have experienced already, and some are yet to come, but perhaps I can set out the defining stages of the process as I see them.
1. Unfounded Optimism
John has returned to UK now and is back in his house in Hungerford, he is a bit shell shocked, after all, he hit it off so well with Maribel, he is in love with her, and its been 24 hours and he is in agony, he misses her like crazy, he has been on the net for 2 hours already, he has called her for a quick chat on her mobile, he is not back at work yet, since its Sunday, and he is back in the office on Monday morning, when he arrived back at Heathrow, he looked out of the window and saw the weather, it’s the usual British weather, freezing bloody cold and the goods rarely turn up !
He walked down the concourse to get his bags, those clowns in the baggage handling department have dumped his bags on the carousel, the wheels are broken off, but its 7.00am in the morning and he cant be bothered to complain, then he gets the bus round to the long term car park, and cant remember where he left his car, takes him about 30 minutes to find it, when he does get there, the battery is flat, and he has to get the car park people to start him, he is not a happy chappy.
This was only day 1 when he arrives back at the house there is so much mail on the doorstep that he can barely get through the door, and to top it all, the credit card bill is already on the doorstep, sounds familiar doesn’t it ? Monday was a crap day, no one is too much interested in his great 3 week junket to the Philippines, not much interest in seeing his digital photos, he bumps off from work at around 3.30pm and shoots home for a cup of tea.
John is now looking at the 4 walls of his house, its around 5.30pm, Maribel has long since gone to bed, she cant help him in his hour of need, he is lonely, tired and about as happy to be back in the UK as he is being picked for the Great Britain Olympic toboggan team.
However, John is one of those optimistic guys, so he thinks time to get the forms from the internet for the marriage visa, shouldn’t be too much of a problem, just fill in a quick form and get it off to the Embassy, in a couple of weeks, should be sorted out and he can buy Maribel’s ticket, it wont be long before she arrives at Heathrow, oh its not so bad !!
2. Reality sets in !
John has been back a week now, he is still a little shell shocked, its not much fun watching T.V. at night without Maribel, but he is starting to realize now that both Governments, that is the British Government and the Philippines Government do require some serious paperwork, however John reasons, he has everything that is required, shouldn’t be too much of a problem, fill in a few forms, send it off, and hopefully in a about a couple of weeks, a visa should be issued, Maribel is getting a little frustrated as well, she is missing John, but she is assured by John that he is handling things and she will be coming soon, Maribel, is so excited and goes around letting everyone know in the Barangay that soon she is leaving for UK, and a new life.
3. Confusion is setting in !
Its been 4 weeks now, and John has filled in all the forms, but then the forms have been sent back, as they do not have the supporting documentation that was asked for, the British Embassy are not very helpful, they just keep sending things back, what is going on ? They keep talking about Evidence of Relationship ? What are they talking about ? I have met her, we are in love, what has it got to do with them, why are they interested in who I want to marry, why should it concern them ? What’s going on over there. Why is it taking so long ?
4. The Resentment Stage.
John has been checking around the net now, has logged into some help sites for Fil-West marriages, has been looking at other peoples, stories, cooler heads have been telling him, that it takes a lot of time, so he starts to feel resentful, What business is it of the UK government to tell him who he can marry, why do they have to take all of this time, when they let all these Asylum seekers in without any problems, then give them free money and a free house, he thinks, What if I can get a tourist visa for her, that should be quicker, then she can come and live with me, other cooler heads tell him not to try that, its too dangerous, and it wont work anyway, but he is now very resentful, he goes to the shopping malls, he and he can pick out other Brit-Phil and Brit-Thai couples, he starts to resent them also, he now starts to think that the Government pen pushers are going out of their way to make sure he and Maribel never get together, they just make things difficult, what can he do now ?
5. The Rebellion stage.
John consults with other people regularly now, Maribel doesn’t know what is happening since, John told her that things would be sorted out, that was 4 months ago, and still he has heard nothing, she has now been given a date for an interview but that is in 4 months time as well, well that’s that then, this is not the way to go, John then writes to his MP, his MP gets the letter, date stamps it, and John doesn’t hear anything about that for 4 weeks as well, when he does get a reply, his MP doesn’t say too much either, apart from the fact that Maribels, application is with the Embassy, and that it is being processed.
He reasons now, that he will get her a student visa or something, maybe get her in the back door, cancel this application and make another one, surely there has to be a better way, time is running away, its been 6 months now, the interview is in about 2 months, how much longer ?
6. The Despair stage.
Its been months now, and John is coming to the end of his tether, something must be wrong, what’s happening, he still hasn’t heard anything from them, nor has Maribel, she still hasn’t had her interview, things just seem to drag on, the separation is killing him, its almost as the whole system is against him, is it because, he has missed something, is it because of his writing, can they understand it ? Has he missed out on a document somewhere ? What is it, when he calls them, they just tell him that his Application is being processed, and they have it, the person who is dealing with it, is only annual leave, and it has to be handled by them on their return, despair is certainly setting in, and is cruel beyond belief.
7. The Zombie stage.
John is vastly becoming a Zombie now, he cant sleep, he cant work, he is having trouble meeting his targets, he spends more time surfing the net now, looking at Filipino internet sites, he begins to doubt himself, he begins to resent all over married couples, he even thinks it would be better to tell Maribel, that things are not moving, and that its not likely she will get her visa, he tells her that maybe they should cool it, and thinks perhaps she would be better off with someone locally, but he loves her, and is just thinking of her, all of these thoughts start eating into his mind.
8. The Euphoric Stage.
Eureka !!. Maribel calls John and tells him that she has been on her interview and the Embassy have called her to tell her to come and collect her entry clearance visa, she can come to the UK when she is ready, apart from attending the CFO seminar, she is ready to fly, out of the blue, John cannot believe it, he is ecstatic, and just cannot believe that it has all come to fruition, it is now nearly 12 months, John picks himself up and goes into the street and shouts YES !!!! Like in a wonderful life, because lets face it, it really is.
Its easy for frustrations to set in about the visa processing period, every case is different, some can go quickly, others more slowly, when you realize that its not personal, and that at some stage, you are going to get a visa, or you are not, the British Embassy statistics are as follows:
92 per cent of all applicants who apply for a Entry Clearance Visa for settlement of a Fiancée or a spouse, are granted their visa.
So then the Odds are definitely in you favour, be patient and Good Luck.