Arthur Little
20th November 2009, 02:38
... Patience is a virtue! Not so, it seems, for one newly-deceased Church of Scotland Minister. Approaching the Pearly Gates, he was somewhat less than imbued with the Holy Spirit :angry: to find himself at the tail-end of a long queue of erstwhile mortals waiting to be judged by St Peter.
Ever-conscious of the importance of his earthly calling, the disinguished - yet pompously high-minded - cleric decided to exercise what he arrogantly believed was his "divine right" to prevail upon the great Christian Apostle to grant him an interview ahead of the multitude of long-suffering souls awaiting salvation. Unimpressed, however, St Peter - whilst acknowledging the merits of a 'man of the Cloth' who'd faithfully preached the Word of the Lord for nigh-on half a century - calmly informed God's [not so humble] Servant that he would need to wait his turn like everyone else.
And so it was, that a suitably chastised (if not disgruntled) reverend gentleman reluctantly returned to the ever-lengthening formation from whence he came.
But by-and-by, his tolerance threshold predictably waning with each slow tick of Old Father Time's pendulum, he again became increasingly restless and irritable. So back he went, in a renewed attempt to plead his case by stating categorically how, during his 50 years of preaching the Gospel on Earth, he'd "put the fear of God into literally thousands of people".
Frustrated by this further rude interruption, Saint Peter responded by looking the clergyman straight in the eye. Then, pointing at a young woman at the head of the queue, declared:
'D'you see this lady, here? Well, let me tell you, she passed her driving test only last week ... and, in that ONE WEEK, SHE managed to put the fear of God into more folk than YOU did in all your years in the ministry!'
:omg:
Ever-conscious of the importance of his earthly calling, the disinguished - yet pompously high-minded - cleric decided to exercise what he arrogantly believed was his "divine right" to prevail upon the great Christian Apostle to grant him an interview ahead of the multitude of long-suffering souls awaiting salvation. Unimpressed, however, St Peter - whilst acknowledging the merits of a 'man of the Cloth' who'd faithfully preached the Word of the Lord for nigh-on half a century - calmly informed God's [not so humble] Servant that he would need to wait his turn like everyone else.
And so it was, that a suitably chastised (if not disgruntled) reverend gentleman reluctantly returned to the ever-lengthening formation from whence he came.
But by-and-by, his tolerance threshold predictably waning with each slow tick of Old Father Time's pendulum, he again became increasingly restless and irritable. So back he went, in a renewed attempt to plead his case by stating categorically how, during his 50 years of preaching the Gospel on Earth, he'd "put the fear of God into literally thousands of people".
Frustrated by this further rude interruption, Saint Peter responded by looking the clergyman straight in the eye. Then, pointing at a young woman at the head of the queue, declared:
'D'you see this lady, here? Well, let me tell you, she passed her driving test only last week ... and, in that ONE WEEK, SHE managed to put the fear of God into more folk than YOU did in all your years in the ministry!'
:omg: