Insecure & Bitter & "Small" men, roaming the Philippines!

[James Hubbard]

I have found, whilst travelling and living in the Philippines, that there seems to be a very unique pathology I have never discovered here.

When looking at the kind of Brit/Euro/American men who are going around the Philippines looking for a wife, I have found a lot of guys who are:


*Insecure and are afraid to let their wives come to their country

The reasoning is ... if my wife comes to Australia or England or America - as the case may be, she will find a guy who's younger, richer, better looking or ... just a better general prospect than me.

I actually found myself having a drink with an old English retired solicitor and an Australian old man (both of whom had wives in their early 20's) who told me what an idiot I am for wanting to bring my wife to the UK!
:doh

Such a position must lead to rather depressed men! lol!



* Men who treat their wives as paid employees

It's the general, I paid for you, now you do what i want you to do. Clean the house now. Feed me now. Fix me a beer now. :do_it: with me NOW!

My australian friend told me that ... if his young wife didn't comply with his demands, he'd send her back to her family to "eat grass" :NoNo:


* The cash cow guy

This guy gets no attention from girls in England coz, he's on about £18k and that's not a lot in a big city....

But, he goes to the Philippines, and he can throw money around like it was confetti!

This guy gets a lot of girls and a lot of :do_it: ... and we all know the reason why, it's not because of :heartshape1: ... it's all about the :REGamblMoney01HL1::REGamblMoney01HL1:

He gets his :do_it:, she gets her :REGamblMoney01HL1: ... it's a business deal, not much else.



*Then there are the bitter old farts who have been through a divorce or 3, and think that they'll find a more principled young lady in the Philippines, but they may end up with a :Cuckoo: girl.


So what about me?

Well, my situation was a little bit different. I was with the same girl in UK for years, and that relationship just ended. Around that time frame, i started talking to the girl (who is now my wife) ... and we just hit it off, better than with my ex, or any other gf i ever had. I thought it was gonna be just a friendship, but ended up being love, and now we are married, we lived together in the Phils for a year and now she's lodging the application for her settlement visa!

I guess it's strange how things work.

Anyway, I just wanted to post up my observations here. :Cuckoo:

[Steve.r]

Well done, thank for sharing :Wave:

But there are some BIG generalisations there, you hold a big brush. Everyones story is different I am sure.

[stevewool]

wow i thought i was reading my story there, well sort of , i am rich yes married twice have 3 of my own children and have 2 adopted children too,i thought my life was over once after my ex wanted a differant life and walked out leaving her own children with me to bring up, it was those children who said find someone dad , that will care for you and you care for them , thats when i found emma or emma found me , most on here know she is coming this month, and we hope to marry this year and i hope lots of friends i have made on here will attend or meet up , so really what i am saying here is we might not all be doctors or teachers but we all love our future partners wives or gf

[James Hubbard]

Hey, i hope its still warm when she gets here :)

[Sim11UK]

The employee one, is the most disturbing. :NoNo:
Have to say, I've seen some odd sights, but I'll leave it at that, I think. ;)

[James Hubbard]

The employee one, is the most disturbing. :NoNo:
Have to say, I've seen some odd sights, but I'll leave it at that, I think. ;)

Ya, so you know what i mean! It tends to range from employee --- to ---- indentured servitude :cwm24:

[somebody]

Sadly I have come across come guys who come across like that both when they are in the Uk on planes and over in phill. Who were saying how i should treat my Wife and Phill family:NoNo:

I have met some americans in particular (certainly not all americans) ho were treating their girlfriends like objects and talking about them to me in a manor i found offensive and presuming my then Wife to be was just a plaything :NoNo:

Steve Wool I certainly dont think James would put you in that group I know I certainly wouldn't what i know of you from this site Emma soundslike she is a very lucky Lady:xxgrinning--00xx3:

[RickyR]

And what about me? Bitter because I have no option but to be in the Philippines. :-(
Not thats it terrible place, far from it, just not my cup of tea.

[-sillybilly-]

I hate those nasty old farts! they can have their own life and live on their own for the rest of their lives!
I aint having that kind of husband with stinky attitude who treats their wives as slaves.

Im glad i found my new husband. Had that experienced with my ex. He was a filipino and when hes had enough then he went off to :do_it: someone else and told me shes much better than me in everything from cooking, housekeeping, :Sex::do_it:!

And from then on ive lost my self steem and thought that i was a useless wife. But when time moves on ive started to realize that im glad im no longer his slave.

[James Hubbard]

Sorry to hear about all the things that happened, but glad that you are happy now :D:xxgrinning--00xx3:

[Northerner]

Sad how some men see their wives in his way:NoNo:

I think men like that have forgotten what a wife is. A wife is to share your life with, not just the summer holidays or winter! And I am sure everyone will agree that there is far more to a marriage than :shehumper:

[-sillybilly-]

Sorry to hear about all the things that happened, but glad that you are happy now :D:xxgrinning--00xx3:

Yes i certainly am happy now.
But still the past play up my mind and wants to kill my ex. Actually, i wonna thank him in the end for making me stronger and for being an :action-smiley-081: as it gave me time and space for myself to think and moved on. And now here i am.:)

He cant beat me now! Im a stronger person.

[James Hubbard]

Yes i certainly am happy now.
But still the past play up my mind and wants to kill my ex. Actually, i wonna thank him in the end for making me stronger and for being an :action-smiley-081: as it gave me time and space for myself to think and moved on. And now here i am.:)

He cant beat me now! Im a stronger person.

you go girl

[-sillybilly-]

you go girl

What. Kill my ex-husband?:D:D

[James Hubbard]

What. Kill my ex-husband?:D:D:Cuckoo:

hahaha :omg::omg::omg:

[bornatbirth]

just recently i have meet a lot of uk hubbys and filipina wifes and its easy to generalize because most are true, i could say what i think and it will offend people so i wont bother :D

i have to admit there are some who do marry for the wrong reasons?

but whatever people think there are many couples who are from all different back grounds and seem to be happy, so whats the problem?

[James Hubbard]

i could say what i think and it will offend people so i wont bother :D?

hey you're not normally shy hehe :icon_lol:

[-sillybilly-]

just recently i have meet a lot of uk hubbys and filipina wifes and its easy to generalize because most are true, i could say what i think and it will offend people so i wont bother :D

i have to admit there are some who do marry for the wrong reasons?

but whatever people think there are many couples who are from all different back grounds and seem to be happy, so whats the problem?

hmm...you're gonna have a heart attack:omg: or loose your mind:crazy: if you keep things on your own.....:D:D
C'mon Bornatbirth spit it out!:D
It will raise a good thread and conversation.
People shouldnt get offended if they are mature enough. Were talking adults here.:)

[bornatbirth]

thx for the thoughts about my health but i will be fine :icon_lol:

to be honest there are things i dont like in uk/filipina relationships and yet i seen the same thing over and over again but who am i to criticize?

but i met a couple just recently who put a big smile on my face, lets say a smoking hot lady with a less smoking hot hubby and i asked my wife what does she see in him because i know what he sees in her :hubbahubba: :icon_lol:

[Pete/London]

but i met a couple just recently who put a big smile on my face, lets say a smoking hot lady with a less smoking hot hubby and i asked my wife what does she see in him because i know what he sees in her :hubbahubba: :icon_lol:

Well you might of introduced yourself and said hello:Erm:

[Pete/London]

Duplicated ?

[sars_notd_virus]

When looking at the kind of Brit/Euro/American men who are going around the Philippines looking for a wife, I have found a lot of guys who are:


*Insecure and are afraid to let their wives come to their country


* Men who treat their wives as paid employees


* The cash cow guy




Wot kind of man is that???? negative, selfish, wishy washy, embarrassing, critical, or a slob. Why spend your life with a jerk??:xxgrinning-smiley-0
option 1. RUN
option 2. RUN FAST
option 3. RUN FAST AND AWAY and NEVER LOOK BACK:rolleyes:



So what about me?
Am just lucky i married the right person:xxgrinning--00xx3::heartshape1:

[James Hubbard]

Wot kind of man is that???? negative, selfish, wishy washy, embarrassing, critical, or a slob. Why spend your life with a jerk??:xxgrinning-smiley-0
option 1. RUN
option 2. RUN FAST
option 3. RUN FAST AND AWAY and NEVER LOOK BACK:rolleyes:



So what about me?
Am just lucky i married the right person:xxgrinning--00xx3::heartshape1:

Well said and beautifully put! :appl::appl::appl:

[rani]

well everyone has his own reason but i pity all the foreigners who was looking for a partner to be their slave etc... guess they are fooling themselves!!!!!!!!!

[James Hubbard]

well everyone has his own reason but i pity all the foreigners who was looking for a partner to be their slave etc... guess they are fooling themselves!!!!!!!!!

Or ... on the other hand ... he may get himself a slave and she'll be a gold-digger, and she'll get his money when he dies in 10 -15 years lol!

She will be a slave as a sort of "investment"
:yikes::cwm24::yikes:

lol

[rani]

nice thought james :)

[malditako]

got a good point james :)

[Steve.r]

Well, I can only hope that 'we' as a community (Filipino Uk) do not encourage that sort of behavoir. We all laugh and joke about various things/subjects, but like I said earlier, we all have our own story as to why/how we found our Mahals, and I know of no one here who disrespects their partner in the ways you describe James. In fact quite the opposite imo.

[James Hubbard]

Well, I can only hope that 'we' as a community (Filipino Uk) do not encourage that sort of behavoir.

Yes, it's just as well! lol! The behaviours are reprehensible!


I know of no one here who disrespects their partner in the ways you describe James. In fact quite the opposite imo


I am happy to hear that :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[aromulus]

i could say what i think and it will offend people so i wont bother

It never stopped you before...:Erm:

[James Hubbard]

It never stopped you before...:Erm:

That was my first thought upon seeing the previously mentioned quote lol!

[stevewool]

Steve Wool I certainly dont think James would put you in that group I know I certainly wouldn't what i know of you from this site Emma soundslike she is a very lucky Lady:xxgrinning--00xx3:

thanks for the nice comment there , but it is i who is the lucky one , i know she loves me for who and i do love emma for the person she is too:)

[triple5]

The guys you refer to in the phils I've come across myself, easy to understand their mentality really. Insecure & Bitter & "Small", not always, guys i've met its more about wanting to be there and looking after number1 and getting their money's worth (wife included). Selfish more than anything else.

I've met more though, who seem happily married and lead normal equal marriages.

[pkelly_uk]

Just from my personal experience - many uk women are married to the benefits system. Heres a list of my UK "dates" before I married a filipina.

Heather - Single mother with one son, unemployed, no intention of any serious relationship. Spends most of her time with her friend who has three children from three different fathers. In her words i'm weird because i had only previously been in one relationship and generally spend my life working.

Alexine - Single mother with four children, describes herself as a "H8TR" of men as her ex "wus a dick innit". Financially on about 30k a year of benefits as two of her children are autistic, has a small following of like minded unemployed friends who are as fierce as the two pitbulls she keeps in the house with her four young children :NoNo:

Yvonne - Three older children between 13 and 18 and unemployed again - yes i seem to attract a certain type of women. Lets just be fwiends for now but you can buy me all the presents i want and take my family on days out and generally be my personal entertainer. At 38 she had rediscovered her inner teenager and was more interested in getting pissed than anything else.

Would filipinas live in such a welfare fuelled fantasy land if they had an all giving benefits system like the UK?