Infidelity in relationships

[Florge]

I saw this tv show today and it's about extra-marital affairs. The husband apparently fell out of love and surprised the wife with a divorce. Made me think if my husband would do the same to me when the time comes... specially when I am older and when everything in my body goes down... lol

I mean, how can a sweet, loving husband just suddenly fell out of love and asked for separation? There should be at least signs of love falling apart right? And in this tv show, there wasn't any sign.. or at least the wife doesn't see any.

I can only think of these reasons why marriages break down:

1. Financial
2. Abuse - emotional, physical, psychological
3. and the most common perhaps, the other woman/man

In that tv show, there was the other woman. How can a woman go so so so low that she has allowed herself to "fall in love" with a married man? I mean, I have been courted by married men before but I choose not to fall in love with them. My conscience and my morals just can't seem to stomach it. That's why I always believe that love is a decision. You decided to love someone no matter what, thus you decided to get married.. but deciding to fall in love with a married man or someone who has a gf? But then, who am I to judge.

For the wives/gf's here... just thinking.... is it the wife's/gf's fault if the husband is philandering? or is it the mistress' fault?

In my humble opinion, it is the (other) woman's fault... especially if she knows that the man is married or in a relationship... uurggghhh... utterly disgusting! Anyway, that's just me... hehehe

Any views?

[bornatbirth]

i think its called "sex" and when married life becomes boring a man or woman can soon move on and not all have your morals :D

[Florge]

so it's just that? sex? just a physical thing? how about the marriage of souls...

oh heck... i just sounded too ideal... lol

thanks BAB!

[bornatbirth]

you come from a different culture but dont people in the philipines have affairs too?, in a country where a married couple should stay married no matter what and usually when the husband as a affair doesnt the wife have one to :icon_lol:....so what happened to their morals :Erm:

[Florge]

yes... filipinos got affairs too.. and their morals had gone to the dogs so to speak.. but like i said, who am i to judge... my dad had an affair as well and he said it was because he wants to know if he can still get a younger woman! :Erm: has his morals gone to the dogs... for sure! but has he been sorry? he has.. and still paying for what he has done... hehehe...

my parents are still married though... not because they can't afford an annullment.. but just that they choose to make their marriage work! :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[-sillybilly-]

Both man and the woman are immorals.
As both of them knows that one is already committed and has responsibilities but carried on with the sinful immoral relationship until it ruins the whole family!

It is such a terrible situation going to that part as the kids will get involved.

Based from my experienced, ex-husband was the weakest person i have ever met. I would not have care if he only :do_it::Sex: his woman but getting her pregnant and having an illegitimate child is just out of order!

So i thought we were not meant for each other and i am not having that kind of life, a father of my children and a man i sleep with being shared by other family. No way!

After a few months i couldnt take it anymore, we never argue about the situation but i just found myself falling out of love with him and he wasnt prepared. Instead of me getting the heartaches he did! Im through with it. Sorry it wasnt my fault.

:Sex::do_it: Someone else is not the solution of being sad and homesick away from your love ones. He Should have thought about his famiy and kids before doing that. So now why the hell would i think about the family and my kids having such a miserable and a father shared with someone else. They can have him. We dont need a weak father and i dont need a shared husband!!!

So i tried to work hard and live on my own and raised my children on my own. No support from him.

Its just all about commitments and how you love one another. No matter what comes to you, should think about the future and the responsibilities.

You wonna ruin your family? its up to you...
You wonna keep your family and make it stronger? its up to you....

[bornatbirth]

you took the news well :Erm:

im sorry to hear this happened to you and yes he should of thought about his duty to your marriage before he wandered and only as himself to blame, i dont blame your reaction, im glad your over him and getting on with your life :D

[-sillybilly-]

you took the news well :Erm:

im sorry to hear this happened to you and yes he should of thought about his duty to your marriage before he wandered and only as himself to blame, i dont blame your reaction, im glad your over him and getting on with your life :D

its not the end of the world. Look to the brighter side. Always!

Men and women should be more responsible when they commit themselves to someone or married. It would have been acceptable to know someone who is afraid of commitments and would just want enjoy life :Sex::do_it:. Atleast you are not commiting sins in the eyes of people and in the eyes of God. :D:D

[pennybarry]

#3 the temptations (3rd party).:D
It is normally happened in a relationship and if you're both strong, then there is no reason to fall out of love.
Most of us Filipinos are not in favour of divorce. We are determined to love our husband and we are determined to fight for our love!
We value our morale, but still there are some who cannot find a boyfriend but choose married man. There's no fun at all being number 2.

They said no one can seduce a happy married husband but I also heard this, no man can resist a clever beautiful woman!:Erm:

Florge, I think we can avoid this if we are package deal to our husband.
Our role must be The Wife, The Friend, and The Mistress !!!

1. Financial, it usally happens as well.

2. Abuse, we will not be, if we will not give them chance to abuse us.

[shrek48]

infidelity is disgusting, if you are unhappy with what you have then have the guts to end it and then look else where.the grass is very rarely greener on the other side and you should work at a marriage. for me being treated as equals and share everything is the answer to a happy relationship. all i need now is someone to share with :bigcry:
ash.x p.s hate liars too or is that another thread :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[-sillybilly-]

infidelity is disgusting, if you are unhappy with what you have then have the guts to end it and then look else where.the grass is very rarely greener on the other side and you should work at a marriage. for me being treated as equals and share everything is the answer to a happy relationship. all i need now is someone to share with :bigcry:
ash.x p.s hate liars too or is that another thread :xxgrinning--00xx3:

Ashx!

When someone starts to lie in a relationship that means he/she can cheat aswell. :)

[rani]

i had a broken marriage because of infidelity... at first, i didnt blame the girl coz she claimed that she doesn't know that my ex was married but after she learned everything, they continued their illicit relationship... after months of "hoping", i finally gave up and filed an annulment... SO THE TWO OF THEM SHOULD BE BLAMED :xxaction-smiley-047

i was not a perfect wife.. as the saying goes, it takes two to tango.... we are not perfect but we had vows and swore to love each other til death etc etc... the thing is, the respect, trust and love goes together... you cant love a person if you don't trust and respect him anymore :NoNo:

[Florge]

but if sex and the lack of it is the reason why couples fell out of love, should it be good enough reason to end a marriage? i mean, marriage is suppose to go beyond the physical needs of the couple... right?

[rani]

right, florge!!! i believe that the couple should talk about the problem before getting into any trouble.. if it was discussed and no improvement happened then they should talk again if they can still live together and stand each other's weaknesses :Cuckoo:

[Jay&Zobel]

This thread caught my attention... It really is so sad to see marriages failing. It's just selfishness.. I just hope it won't happen to me, to my family or to anyone I know.

Florge, please don't tell me your new husband is having an affair?!!! You've just got married!


#3 the temptations (3rd party).:D
Florge, I think we can avoid this if we are package deal to our husband.
Our role must be The Wife, The Friend, and The Mistress !!!


Yep I agree with you Penny... be the three!! Wife, Friend & Mistress!! If I will be in that type of situation, I hate to be the wife or the mistress!!!! Just thinking about this makes me puke...

And husbands should be those as well: Husband, Friend and a Mister? hehe (what's a male-mistress?):Erm: hehe

DON'T BREAK YOUR MARRIAGE! DON'T BREAK ANY MARRIAGES!!

[malditako]

I saw this tv show today and it's about extra-marital affairs. The husband apparently fell out of love and surprised the wife with a divorce. Made me think if my husband would do the same to me when the time comes... specially when I am older and when everything in my body goes down... lol

I mean, how can a sweet, loving husband just suddenly fell out of love and asked for separation? There should be at least signs of love falling apart right? And in this tv show, there wasn't any sign.. or at least the wife doesn't see any.

I can only think of these reasons why marriages break down:

1. Financial
2. Abuse - emotional, physical, psychological
3. and the most common perhaps, the other woman/man

In that tv show, there was the other woman. How can a woman go so so so low that she has allowed herself to "fall in love" with a married man? I mean, I have been courted by married men before but I choose not to fall in love with them. My conscience and my morals just can't seem to stomach it. That's why I always believe that love is a decision. You decided to love someone no matter what, thus you decided to get married.. but deciding to fall in love with a married man or someone who has a gf? But then, who am I to judge.

For the wives/gf's here... just thinking.... is it the wife's/gf's fault if the husband is philandering? or is it the mistress' fault?

In my humble opinion, it is the (other) woman's fault... especially if she knows that the man is married or in a relationship... uurggghhh... utterly disgusting! Anyway, that's just me... hehehe

Any views?

let me add one thing why some marriages failed...i think one reason is ..."a boring sex life"....i believe its not just love that all we need to survive a marriage but we need to keep the fire burning all the time.

[stevewool]

hi well it takes two to tango they say , been there done that , its not nice being the inocent party , be truefull to each other all times and just remember if he or she can do it to you then they can do it to the next one pnce boredom sets in, its not nice so try to sort it out with your love ones before its to late, and just another point , its funny that when someone splits up, the guilty party always seems to get a boyfriend , girlfriend straight away:)

[charlwill]

let me add one thing why some marriages failed...i think one reason is ..."a boring sex life"....i believe its not just love that all we need to survive a marriage but we need to keep the fire burning all the time.

I beg to disagree. Marriage is not all about SEX, it is involving all aspect. Been there, done that! I should say 3rd party is to be blame. Most specially if you know he or she is married. There's no need to wreck someone else marriage. Just think of a karma if you do that, it might happen to you too. I think, husband and wife should have a heart to heart talk and discuss the problem and give your marriage a second chance. If you do that and still not working. You can say to yourself at least we (you) tried your best to save the marriage.

[aromulus]

I beg to disagree. Marriage is not all about SEX, it is involving all aspect. Been there, done that! I should say 3rd party is to be blame. Most specially if you know he or she is married. There's no need to wreck someone else marriage. Just think of a karma if you do that, it might happen to you too. I think, husband and wife should have a heart to heart talk and discuss the problem and give your marriage a second chance. If you do that and still not working. You can say to yourself at least we (you) tried your best to save the marriage.


Spot on...!!!!:xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3:

Some rep points coming your way.....:xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3:

[malditako]

I beg to disagree. Marriage is not all about SEX, it is involving all aspect. Been there, done that! I should say 3rd party is to be blame. Most specially if you know he or she is married. There's no need to wreck someone else marriage. Just think of a karma if you do that, it might happen to you too. I think, husband and wife should have a heart to heart talk and discuss the problem and give your marriage a second chance. If you do that and still not working. You can say to yourself at least we (you) tried your best to save the marriage.

I didn't say marriage is all about SEX...i said its one of the reason why some marriages fails...we're all humans and its a biological need of mankind..other partner maybe more active and experimenting while the partners are not...i agree with you that marriage involve all aspect and its pretty obvious sex is one of the aspect, compatibility in all aspect is pretty important to have a healthy relationship. i think pointing all the blame to a third party is a bias judgement..if a person is married they shouldn't get involve themselves other than their partners in the first place they know the consequences it may bring...i am saying this base on friends experiences, a friend who had been a third party, a friend who cheated his partner and a friend who had been cheated by his partner...and a couple friend who saved their falling marriage only b'coz they are compatible in bed...and u know what i've noticed is it is always the person who had been cheated on always get the sympathy of many...

[junior02]

a ex mate of mine was unfaithful to his wife, he is english and she is filipina. they went back to rp to visit her family,wen they arrived she went to the province and he made excuse and said he had business to sort out in manila, he went to angeles after she went 2 province and went to a few girly bars, but it back fired on him becoz he caught 2 bad cases of the clap and gave it to his now ex wife. they divorced year later back in uk, and she now has the house in uk and the condo and house and lot back in rp, he now lives in bedsit on his own and bankrupt, and his ex wife has a new partner younger than she is and 30years younger than her ex husband. he paid the price big time for being unfaithful...

[Florge]

hmmm.... isn't it that marriage is supposed to transcent from the physical calling of sex? There are ways to be intimated and there are different love languages that you can do to still keep the spark in the relationship...

I have known of many couples who don't have sex anymore but are still so much in love with each other.. so... if you got a boring sex life or zero sex life and make it a reason for falling out of love.. then I think you are not in love at all.. you are in lust!

Right?

[charlwill]

hmmm.... isn't it that marriage is supposed to transcent from the physical calling of sex? There are ways to be intimated and there are different love languages that you can do to still keep the spark in the relationship...

I have known of many couples who don't have sex anymore but are still so much in love with each other.. so... if you got a boring sex life or zero sex life and make it a reason for falling out of love.. then I think you are not in love at all.. you are in lust!

Right?

You're right, Florge. Same here, I have known some couples that don't have sex life anymore but the love still there.

[bornatbirth]

You're right, Florge. Same here, I have known some couples that don't have sex life

have we met :Erm:

what does it matter, it takes 2 to tango and both are guilty, however it happens who are we to judge :Erm:

[charlwill]

have we met :Erm:

what does it matter, it takes 2 to tango and both are guilty, however it happens who are we to judge :Erm:

No, we haven't meet yet. I agree, it make 2 to tango but as what I have said.... if you know that the person involve is married then you have the option to stay away from that person and if you choose to continue then think of the guilt and the karma. What I can see in this world is full of LUST and not LOVE.

[bornatbirth]

No, we haven't meet yet. I agree, it make 2 to tango but as what I have said.... if you know that the person involve is married then you have the option to stay away from that person and if you choose to continue then think of the guilt and the karma. What I can see in this world is full of LUST and not LOVE.

what if he or she doesnt say they are married and only finds out when they have already made a connection :Erm:

[charlwill]

what if he or she doesnt say they are married and only finds out when they have already made a connection :Erm:

As soon as one of them find out. Then, stay away. Simple as that!

[malditako]

lust, desire and love is inseparable in my point of view...

lust is a initial physical attraction to another person while love is not a immediate feeling..it grows overtime and it is something you need to be nurture all the time...if a person is physically attracted to another they tend to be more interested of knowing them (unconsiously) and results of spending more time with them...and the more they spend time the more the feeling gets intense and more deeper other than lust...

as what other married friends saying...always makes yourself to look good in your partners eyes, mesmerize them so they wont look around...anyway just sharing my thoughts :)

[Florge]

lust, desire and love is inseparable in my point of view...

lust is a initial physical attraction to another person while love is not a immediate feeling..it grows overtime and it is something you need to be nurture all the time...if a person is physically attracted to another they tend to be more interested of knowing them (unconsiously) and results of spending more time with them...and the more they spend time the more the feeling gets intense and more deeper other than lust...

as what other married friends saying...always makes yourself to look good in your partners eyes, mesmerize them so they wont look around...anyway just sharing my thoughts :)

You got a point there garry.. but the thing is, there a danger in that because lust somehow blinds you with the essence of love. Love is patient, love is kind... but if you are in the mood and feel very lustful, and the other is not, will you be patient and kind? I don't think so... you get selfishe and just think about yourself... that's why sexual abuse still happens in marriages.. which is sad really...

It's cool if the lust becomes love... but I would still prefer to have the love first, then the lust comes after... that's the beauty of the courtship stage which doesn't happen very often nowadays...

[Arthur Little]

I would still prefer to have the love first, then the lust comes after... that's the beauty of the courtship stage which doesn't happen very often nowadays...

... and more's the pity! :gp:, Florge.

[fred]

lust, desire and love is inseparable in my point of view...

lust is a initial physical attraction to another person while love is not a immediate feeling..it grows overtime and it is something you need to be nurture all the time...if a person is physically attracted to another they tend to be more interested of knowing them (unconsiously) and results of spending more time with them...and the more they spend time the more the feeling gets intense and more deeper other than lust...

Yeah...But not always... Love can sometimes hit harder than lust so Im talking about the love at first sight thing...(and then you marry em!!Ouch)

[stevewool]

marrige is about being together the person you fell in love with is the person that means the world to you, i beleive i have found my true partner :)

[rani]

keep the music playing stevewool :heartshape1:

[stevewool]

its the little things that matter when being together from the start or near the end , saying i love you , cooking dinner buying that small gift, does not cost much at all , a smile here a kiss too and just touching and brushing against each other knowing someone is close by and are with you because you are you and nothing else, work on those points and life should be great, some of us learn the hard way me included but learnt i have :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[kimmi]

I beg to disagree. Marriage is not all about SEX, it is involving all aspect. Been there, done that! I should say 3rd party is to be blame. Most specially if you know he or she is married. There's no need to wreck someone else marriage. Just think of a karma if you do that, it might happen to you too. I think, husband and wife should have a heart to heart talk and discuss the problem and give your marriage a second chance. If you do that and still not working. You can say to yourself at least we (you) tried your best to save the marriage.

:xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3: you've said it all Te Char..

For me, if there's a problem between husband and wife it will be better if they talk about it, sort things out and do what they think is the best for their relationship..

[rani]

its the little things that matter when being together from the start or near the end , saying i love you , cooking dinner buying that small gift, does not cost much at all , a smile here a kiss too and just touching and brushing against each other knowing someone is close by and are with you because you are you and nothing else, work on those points and life should be great, some of us learn the hard way me included but learnt i have :xxgrinning--00xx3:

i can feel your happiness stevewool :Jump:

[Florge]

its the little things that matter when being together from the start or near the end , saying i love you , cooking dinner buying that small gift, does not cost much at all , a smile here a kiss too and just touching and brushing against each other knowing someone is close by and are with you because you are you and nothing else, work on those points and life should be great, some of us learn the hard way me included but learnt i have :xxgrinning--00xx3:

ahhhwww... that's true! really true... good thing you found that kind of love... lots of people are still searching...

[Arthur Little]

:xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3: you've said it all Te Char..

For me, if there's a problem between husband and wife it will be better if they talk about it, sort things out and do what they think is the best for their relationship..

Absolutely! :iagree: ... it's the ONLY way forward, if couples hope to resolve this sort of situation.

[Florge]

but what if after learning that the other is married, the mistress/lover insists on divorcing the other half... and the husband/wife relents... how can the heart to heart talk happen?

reminds me of the movie It's Complicated (meryl streep)

[kimmi]

but what if after learning that the other is married, the mistress/lover insists on divorcing the other half... and the husband/wife relents... how can the heart to heart talk happen?

reminds me of the movie It's Complicated (meryl streep)

is the mistress/lover that desperate?:NoNo::NoNo::NoNo:

can she/he not just look for a single man that isn't alreadycommited? or is he/she that ugly?:doh:doh

oh well, if the mistress/lover is really like that I just hope he/she can still sleep nice and sound at night knowing that she/he wrecked a family.:doh:doh:doh hope she realize that she/he has no assurance that it wont going to happen to her/him.

[Jay&Zobel]

eto lang masasabi ko, kung alam nung babae pala na may asawa na yung lalaki or vice versa... KASUKLAMSUKLAM!

----

But when it comes to sex... MEN WILL ALWAYS BE HORNY no matter what! And I really believe that making love with your husband/wife is very important aspect in marriage! So don't just stare, do something! Enjoy each other's company :xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3:

[Florge]

KALAGIMLAGIM... kahihiyan ng kanyang mga magulang...

I always tell my students before that whatever you do is your way of telling everyone how you were raised by your parents... soooooo... if you behave like this... i wonder what kind of family he/she has? or friends? or the environment he/she lives in as these contribute to the kind of person you are....

tsk tsk tsk... kawawang magulang.. :NoNo::NoNo::NoNo:

[Arthur Little]

but what if after learning that the other is married, the mistress/lover insists on divorcing the other half... and the husband/wife relents... how can the heart to heart talk happen?

reminds me of the movie It's Complicated (meryl streep)

Well :anerikke: ... even if the affair HAS reached such a crucial stage, then there is STILL room for dicussion, in that the guilty spouse ought to be sufficiently guided by the dictates of his/her conscience as to be open and honest with his/her marital partner about what has happened ... and HOW he or she plans to deal with the situation - whether it be by either ending the illicit liaison or divorcing the husband/wife.

[Northerner]

Well, sex is a huge reason why relationships fall apart. Men see sex as love and if it is getting less and less frequent with their wife/girlfriend then in their minds they will think "she does not love me anymore". Also, what happened in the relationship prior to this one? Often men and women will have scars to their mindsets from previous relationships. If your previous boyfriend/girlfriend cheated on you then perhaps you might feel the next one will do the same, and so you feel less secure in the relationship and risk it on another.

And without sex, sexual frustration kicks in! Men (especially) will suffer bouts of depression if they are forced to go without sex because their wives are not feeling it anymore. And with this depression they will look to other things to interest them, whether that be a PlayStation 3 or another woman.. And like I said before, if they feel unloved, well :NoNo:

I think both people need to make an effort in marriage, try to meet the others needs whenever possible. Any relationship can be a struggle at times, but only if both parties understand that and understand each other, can they get through those rocky times together.

[bornatbirth]

what was the tv show?

and why are all these forum members who havent posted for a long time are posting here :Erm:

how many have been divorced or had there marriage anulled in this forum or even in this thread, those who have shouldnt be posting and giving advice in this thread :D

[gecko_pikachu]

Why, in general, do men — and women — cheat? And why would Tiger Woods, one of the most successful professional golfers of all time, cheat on his wife, Elin Nordegren?

Why Tiger Woods cheated will likely remain a mystery for some time, until he chooses to share his own personal motivations. But if he’s like most men who cheat, he likely did so because of dissatisfaction with his marriage, a difference in sex drive between him and his spouse, and perhaps greater personality differences between he and his spouse that either of them realize.

A good, healthy relationship means understanding one another, including one’s sexual needs. In this way, men and women are not so different. Some women prefer romance, but guess what — so do some men. None of these types of generalizations are of any use until you understand the person (not the object) you are in a relationship with. That’s done through simple communication — sit down and talk about your sexual needs with your partner.


An unhealthy relationship that lacks real communication and is on auto-pilot is at risk for a cheating partner. Especially if problems are present in the relationship that are not being realistically addressed in a timely manner (e.g., through couple’s counseling or marriage therapy). Relationships don’t cure themselves — it takes the resolve and commitment of both people in order to make it work.

[pennybarry]

SEX, is always depend on person involved in marriage. I believe sex is one of the most important ingredients in healthy marriage for young people who have strong sex drive.
But for elderly and for people with health problems, it is not important with them. I believe they can still have a very healthy relationship even without sex as LOVE can gain from being a good companion, a friend, and lover. Caress, understanding, thoughtfulness can make you feel inlove.
Every person is unique!



I always tell my students before that whatever you do is your way of telling everyone how you were raised by your parents... soooooo... if you behave like this... i wonder what kind of family he/she has? or friends? or the environment he/she lives in as these contribute to the kind of person you are....

tsk tsk tsk... kawawang magulang.. :NoNo::NoNo::NoNo:

I remember my hubby, the only one I made him shut his mouth is when I told him, never to be jealous as we are ten in the family but only one father and one mother. Not in our clan screwing around.
Trust me or dump me if you no longer trust me.:xxgrinning--00xx3:
Then he gave me chocolates as peace offerings and told him I am no longer a kid, that if Mom gives me candies, I'll stop crying. :icon_lol::laugher:

I want holidays not chockies!:heartshape1::Rasp:

[malditako]

eto lang masasabi ko, kung alam nung babae pala na may asawa na yung lalaki or vice versa... KASUKLAMSUKLAM!

----

But when it comes to sex... MEN WILL ALWAYS BE HORNY no matter what! And I really believe that making love with your husband/wife is very important aspect in marriage! So don't just stare, do something! Enjoy each other's company :xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3:

:xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3:

[malditako]

KALAGIMLAGIM... kahihiyan ng kanyang mga magulang...

I always tell my students before that whatever you do is your way of telling everyone how you were raised by your parents... soooooo... if you behave like this... i wonder what kind of family he/she has? or friends? or the environment he/she lives in as these contribute to the kind of person you are....

tsk tsk tsk... kawawang magulang.. :NoNo::NoNo::NoNo:

not all the time i guess...a person has their on mind and decide for themselves in a way different what their family had thought them...and when a person think they are inlove they tend to break all the rules

[pennybarry]

not all the time i guess...a person has his on mind and decide for themselves in a way different what their family had thought them...and when a person think they are inlove they tend to break all the rules
At maraming matalinong babae na bobo pagdating sa PAG-IBIG ! :D:omg::icon_lol::laugher:

[LEAHnew]

what was the tv show?

and why are all these forum members who havent posted for a long time are posting here :Erm:

how many have been divorced or had there marriage anulled in this forum or even in this thread, those who have shouldnt be posting and giving advice in this thread :D

:Erm:coz whoever doesn't post here meaning having an affair?:omg::D:Rasp::Cuckoo::icon_lol:
They don't post that much in the forum but in FB we are all updated:D:Rasp:

Ok back to the topic..I'm afraid if this thing happened to me...:NoNo::NoNo: but I know for sure i have so many friends that can back me up and can pull the hair of that beech:D:behead::NEW3::xxmixed-smiley-017::voodoo::voodoo::voodoo::D

[Doc Alan]

:Erm:coz whoever doesn't post here meaning having an affair?:omg::D:Rasp::Cuckoo::icon_lol:
They don't post that much in the forum but in FB we are all updated:D:Rasp:

There is much good advice on this thread but I suspect the people most needing that advice don't read it and therefore certainly don't post :doh I've made mistakes in my private life and what I've learned is to be very cautious criticising others without knowing all the facts:NoNo:Inevitably what appears on the forum and facebook is what the individual chooses to say in public. That's a lot easier than what we all have to face in the real world :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[aromulus]

I've made mistakes in my private life and what I've learned is to be very cautious criticising others without knowing all the facts:NoNo:

What's up doc...???:Erm:

Want to talk about it...?:Erm:

:icon_lol:

[malditako]

At maraming matalinong babae na bobo pagdating sa PAG-IBIG ! :D:omg::icon_lol::laugher:

so true penny...can't believe how common it is in a professional environment rather than those who are living a simple life in the province..i got a friend who is a mistress but who am i to judge her or criticise her..im just a friend who can give advice (if ever they ask) base on what i believe is right and good for me...inspite of her situation (immoral to other) she is a very good friend and good to others well of course not a good person to his partners wife....but what i can see to their relationship is they supply each others need and all that makes them happy being together...which probably the guy is not getting from his wife...

[gWaPito]

I beg to differ on the relationship between advanced years of age and poor or little or no sex life. The fact is its either the relationship is going down the pan or there is health issues. If the guy is healthy in both mind and body there is no reason he cant perform 4/5 times a week in week out FACT. Why wld a guy not getting any wld want to play with a play station I guess like someone said is depression hence the no sex. So pls let us not relate old age and the lack of sex in the same package please

[stevewool]

well my age is 51 and i act 27 and feel 27 too, yes been divorced twice made mistakes too, but thats all in the past its the future we all have look forward to that we all should , be happy with who we are and who we are with , just remember what you put into life you may get back fourfold goodluck:xxgrinning--00xx3:

[malditako]

gwapito been a long time how have u been :)

[bornatbirth]

gwapito been a long time how have u been :)

hes been busy, at least 5 times a week :do_it:

[malditako]

lol bornatbirth....

[Florge]

the show was a Oprah.. hehehe... love her! It was a repeat... she interviewed the wife who asked for help since she can't seem to understand why her husband got divorced.. apparently, there wasn't any obvious marital problem... :Erm:

[pennybarry]

Sa bawat pelikula eh laging may kontra bida, hindi maganda ang pelikula kapag wala nito. :D Pero kalimitan happy ending.:xxgrinning--00xx3::heartshape1:

[maria_and_matt]

most of us are blessed to have a hubby thats faithful!but for some it must be a nightmare! all i can say is KARMA! affairs do happen unfortunately, but i think that if a person has any sense of decency and respect you will stay away when u know that the other person is married or in an committed relationship. there are a LOT of people out there thats single, for heavens sake do not ruin a marriage!

lastly, i think that stoning to death sounds like a good idea:laugher:

[Florge]

most of us are blessed to have a hubby thats faithful!but for some it must be a nightmare! all i can say is KARMA! affairs do happen unfortunately, but i think that if a person has any sense of decency and respect you will stay away when u know that the other person is married or in an committed relationship. there are a LOT of people out there thats single, for heavens sake do not ruin a marriage!

lastly, i think that stoning to death sounds like a good idea:laugher:

well, we got extra flags and some bricks left when we had our driveway re-layed.... hehehehe...

[charlwill]

most of us are blessed to have a hubby thats faithful!but for some it must be a nightmare! all i can say is KARMA! affairs do happen unfortunately, but i think that if a person has any sense of decency and respect you will stay away when u know that the other person is married or in an committed relationship. there are a LOT of people out there thats single, for heavens sake do not ruin a marriage!

lastly, i think that stoning to death sounds like a good idea:laugher:


well, we got extra flags and some bricks left when we had our driveway re-layed.... hehehehe...
Ang lulupit mga Madame!!!! :Cuckoo: :xxgrinning--00xx3::laugher::laugher: But true, I know the feeling.

[Lancashirelad]

For me taking the marriage vows in Church before God means i wont ever cheat, I intend to keep all my promises.
i guess its down to the individuals involved, people value fidelity differently and react differently to temptation depending on the strength at the time and the circumstances of there marriage.

[Florge]

well, either vows in church or civil, you should not cheat and intend to keep working on your marriage.. because if you can't, then don't get married at all...

[Arthur Little]

well, either *vows in church or civil, you should not cheat and intend to keep working on your marriage.. because if you can't, then don't get married at all...

... sometimes easier *SAID than done! But :iagree: in principle, Florge.

[stevewool]

indeed arthur, i know myself that i will never cheat i have never done, but you just hope that your partner is strong enough to say no , thats all you have to do ladies and gentlemen, just say no thankyou and pass them onto ash

[Florge]

indeed arthur, i know myself that i will never cheat i have never done, but you just hope that your partner is strong enough to say no , thats all you have to do ladies and gentlemen, just say no thankyou and pass them onto ash

I agree... just like drugs... say no... LOL

[bornatbirth]

well, either vows in church or civil, you should not cheat and intend to keep working on your marriage.. because if you can't, then don't get married at all...

how many people have split up and have remarried, if yours and other advice worked then many wont be married to who they are now :Erm:

i admire your morals but in the modern world they dont work.

btw some posts here make me :laugher:

[pennybarry]

i admire your morals but in the modern world they dont work.



Yes maybe!
Because I have seen so may children who suffers after divorce.
Only in this modern country I heard news about a mother killing her 3 kids.
Seen their house in Edinburgh yesterday. Terrible! :omg:

or maybe :
Men and women are basically selfish; they want their own way and they seek their own pleasure. If their marriages hit difficulties (and most do) they opt for the easy way out - a divorce; never seeking their Maker's advice or help. Often the excuses put forward are trivial. Some distraught couples pay large sums of money to solicitors, psychiatrists and psychoanalysts: but many of these so-called experts have marital problems of their own.:ReadIt:
http://atschool.eduweb.co.uk/sbs777/laws/divorce.html

[walesrob]

The UK is 4th in the world for divorce rate (http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/peo_div_rat-people-divorce-rate). It seems to me divorce is too easy in this country, and theres too many broken families, and the resulting mess such as homelessness, poverty, crime.

When I read rubbish from the likes of BAB "i admire your morals but in the modern world they dont work." it shows the mentality of this country - basically, can't be bothered, can't fix it/won't fix it and if you stick to your morals it won't work and that's all there is too say about it.

Parents may find a divorce easy enough, but they often forget the effect it has on the children. Still, it doesn't matter - as BAB says "i admire your morals but in the modern world they dont work". :NoNo:

"The British do not expect happiness... they do not want to be happy; they want to be right."
— Quentin Crisp (http://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/49216.Quentin_Crisp)

[bornatbirth]

your missing the point, do people practice what they preach :Erm:

whats the point in having high morals, if the said same people dont live by them :doh

[aposhark]

........They said no one can seduce a happy married husband but I also heard this, no man can resist a clever beautiful woman!:Erm:

Hi Penny,
IMO, a married man should be very careful when he sees a clever beautiful woman and never get into a situation where temptation could be a problem.
Love conquers all :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[pennybarry]

Hi Penny,
IMO, a married man should be very careful when he sees a clever beautiful woman and never get into a situation where temptation could be a problem.
Love conquers all :xxgrinning--00xx3:

Thanks Apo! I agree with you!
I just heard it. :D
When I heard it, I started to be suspicious. lolssss:D:icon_lol:
I must know what my husband interest to a woman to marry.:Rasp:
I am thinking, Am I exactly what he was looking?
Too bad if not! :angry::xxaction-smiley-047:cwm23:

[stevewool]

be happy with what you have , work with what you have , love what you have and usualy you get back 10 fold,but also remember sometimes you dont need a third party to spoil a marriage ,

[joebloggs]

The UK is 4th in the world for divorce rate (http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/peo_div_rat-people-divorce-rate). It seems to me divorce is too easy in this country, and theres too many broken families, and the resulting mess such as homelessness, poverty, crime.

but how many of those who got divorced are now happily remarried to someone else or even the same person :doh

[stem298]

all i could say on this thread is if you cant take the heat leave the other be to do what he/she pleases and get on with your life..when you married each other you pledged to love and respect each other till death do you part..so a third party is not part of that promised..so if you did something like that expect the worst..:xxaction-smiley-047

[walesrob]

but how many of those who got divorced are now happily remarried to someone else or even the same person :doh

How am I supposed to know? :Erm:

[joebloggs]

How am I supposed to know? :Erm:

I remember reading about it somewhere, but forgot the figure :doh

have a look at this rob

http://www.authorstream.com/Presentation/markwjburke-163474-marriage-divorce-trends-2-introductory-sociology-education-ppt-powerpoint/

in 1940 1st marriages accounted for 91% of all marriages, by 1960 it had fallen to 60%

in 1961 remarriages account for %14 of marriages
but 2005 it had increased to 40%.

its not all so simple is it :Erm:

[Florge]

The UK is 4th in the world for divorce rate (http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/peo_div_rat-people-divorce-rate). It seems to me divorce is too easy in this country, and theres too many broken families, and the resulting mess such as homelessness, poverty, crime.

When I read rubbish from the likes of BAB "i admire your morals but in the modern world they dont work." it shows the mentality of this country - basically, can't be bothered, can't fix it/won't fix it and if you stick to your morals it won't work and that's all there is too say about it.

Parents may find a divorce easy enough, but they often forget the effect it has on the children. Still, it doesn't matter - as BAB says "i admire your morals but in the modern world they dont work". :NoNo:

"The British do not expect happiness... they do not want to be happy; they want to be right."
— Quentin Crisp (http://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/49216.Quentin_Crisp)

I agree!!!

[bornatbirth]

I agree!!!

what do you agree with :Erm:

[walesrob]

your missing the point, do people practice what they preach :Erm:

whats the point in having high morals, if the said same people dont live by them :doh

Another defeatist statement. :NoNo: You seem to come up with these gems on a regular basis.

Would you jump off a cliff if someone told you? If someone told you eating coal is good for you, would you eat coal?

To hell what other people do, if they want to dig their own graves, thats their concern, don't look to me for validation or approval, because it won't happen. I 've more pressing matters to attend to. :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[bornatbirth]

Another defeatist statement. :NoNo: You seem to come up with these gems on a regular basis.

Would you jump off a cliff if someone told you? If someone told you eating coal is good for you, would you eat coal?

To hell what other people do, if they want to dig their own graves, thats their concern, don't look to me for validation or approval, because it won't happen. I 've more pressing matters to attend to. :xxgrinning--00xx3:

what planet are you on, i havent a clue what your talking about, what does the above post got to do with anything in this thread :Erm:

if you believe if we all had high morals with strong family values, thats great. :D

i liked being preached to in this forum with there every so moral guidance, just to bad i think those giving the advice are nothing but gossiper's themselfs :Erm:

btw why are you so bothered with what im posting?

[maria_and_matt]

hmmmm just noticed that the thread starter florge is banned.... may I ask why?

[adam&chryss]

came across here and noticed 2 respected members are banned...

just wondering why???

am I missing anything???

[Ann07]

came across here and noticed 2 respected members are banned...

just wondering why???

am I missing anything???

ME too is wondering why? :Erm::Erm::Erm::Erm:

[Northerner]

hmmmm just noticed that the thread starter florge is banned.... may I ask why?

:Erm: Indeed???

[KeithD]

See: http://filipinaroses.com/showthread.php/26603-Joint-Statement-Keith-amp-Ping?p=241486#post241486

Those banned have been two-faced on this thread, saying they follow the vows while spreading rumours and back-stabbing people. :NoNo:

[stevewool]

we all have to be carefull what we say and put on here , sometimes its easy to just write anything, but i do try to say from my hart or what i am passionate about

[malditako]

we all have to be carefull what we say and put on here , sometimes its easy to just write anything, but i do try to say from my hart or what i am passionate about

so true steve...the word we speak show what kind of person we are...

anyway thanks for the nice chat and cup of tea yesterday :)

[malditako]

:yikes::yikes::yikes:....

wonder why some can be too judgemental and always mind others life rather than minding their own...:doh:doh:NoNo:

[stevewool]

hi grace the cup of tea and chat was very nice , it was good seeing you all and hope to see you soon too:xxgrinning--00xx3:

[ghee101]

But when it comes to sex... MEN WILL ALWAYS BE HORNY no matter what! And I really believe that making love with your husband/wife is very important aspect in marriage! So don't just stare, do something! Enjoy each other's company :xxgrinning--00xx3::xxgrinning--00xx3:

i think this is where i say i like it when my bf tells me:

i love you, ghee :luv4: :luv13: :lovecouple: ...but i lust you more :hubbahubba: :do_it: :shehumper: :veryhappy:

[ghee101]

At maraming matalinong babae na bobo pagdating sa PAG-IBIG ! :D:omg::icon_lol::laugher:

aray ko, ate pen!! hahaha okay lang. :D i believe in giving a person and the relationship a chance :xxgrinning--00xx3:

same thing with marriage. give it a chance. if it doesn't feel right anymore, set it free. i believe giving love should be voluntary, it should be given wholeheartedly. i wont feel right if i know that my partner doesn't feel the same love anymore. and vice versa, when a woman doesn't feel the love and passion anymore, it will be hard on both side.

...and im speaking with the SEX part TOO. it will be VERY HARD. :doh

[ghee101]

hes been busy, at least 5 times a week :do_it:

ahahaha! looks like it.

[ghee101]

Well, sex is a huge reason why relationships fall apart. Men see sex as love and if it is getting less and less frequent with their wife/girlfriend then in their minds they will think "she does not love me anymore". Also, what happened in the relationship prior to this one? Often men and women will have scars to their mindsets from previous relationships. If your previous boyfriend/girlfriend cheated on you then perhaps you might feel the next one will do the same, and so you feel less secure in the relationship and risk it on another.

And without sex, sexual frustration kicks in! Men (especially) will suffer bouts of depression if they are forced to go without sex because their wives are not feeling it anymore. And with this depression they will look to other things to interest them, whether that be a PlayStation 3 or another woman.. And like I said before, if they feel unloved, well :NoNo:

I think both people need to make an effort in marriage, try to meet the others needs whenever possible. Any relationship can be a struggle at times, but only if both parties understand that and understand each other, can they get through those rocky times together.

a quote from my boyfriend just a few minutes ago:

"lust without love is crap and short term, and love without lust is boring and long term. the short term ones will think "what am I doing?" and the long term ones will think "what have I done?"

[gWaPito]

Very sad to read whats gone on here. From an outsiders view it looks like trusted friends have been washing others dirty washing in public, not the done thing, me thinks. Many on this thread claiming the moral high ground which I think you have no right to. It was mention 92% of married's in the 1940's were 1st timers, do you really believe that was by choice? I wonder how many of those were unhappy? I wonder how many stayed together all there lives living an unhappy life for what ever reason because they were thinking of there Vows? Of course not. The women folk stayed at home They were trapped unlike in todays world. Yes I agree marriage must be worked at every day by both parties. Yes divorce does make for unhappy Children. How about the Children from unhappy marriages? They too suffer. My Parents were married for 63 years only death parting then. I can tell you 30 of those years were misery for us kids and Mum She Stayed because thats what they did. In my view she was wrong. A waste. Lets not judge people huh Only Thy will judge us not us mere Mortals. We will be judged for sure.

[aposhark]

....Lets not judge people huh Only Thy will judge us not us mere Mortals. We will be judged for sure.

On the contrary, we are only judged in the here and now as there is no other thing that judges us :NoNo:
That is why life is so changeable and exiting.
We should not wait for the end of our lives as Christianity and particularly the Catholic church wants us to :laugher: