ginapeterb
13th May 2005, 19:40
Hi Guys,
You have to read this one...
Its from a Canadian guy..on the Asawa Forum..
Hi everyone,
Ok, she has a best friend in Butuan where she lives. "He" is 19 and her best friend ever since she was able to kick him of his Crystal Meth habit 3 years ago through talking to him. She tells me she " loves him" as a friend. I have a problem with my wife saying she loves another man. she is VERY close to him and says she loves him more than her own life. Hmm. I have issues about that? I have seen them myself, to close for my liking I'm afraid. She says she considers him a son, yet she is always with him seems 24/7. He has even stayed at her parents home with her, She swears No sex or anything, just friends. But he has fessed up that he loves her more than friendship. My wife knows this, yet she continues to say she loves him..... to him. The Valentines card she sent him blew me away. I have told her to stop saying these things to him, she says, : its my life in Butuan until I come to canada " I will do as I wish, he is a friend only, that is all. I have a problems with this guy. Iam a guy and I know what he wants. Yes, ok truthfully, my wife is absolutely gorgeous and very well endowed and I know what he wants. I saw his cell phone last Dec. 217 pics of my wife on it. Hmm. what should I do? I have asked, told, faught, the silent treatment, everything, nothing works, she just says, she knew him before I knew her and he is her best friend and she loves him. man..... I cant accept that , hearing those words..........Kills me. What should I do? How can I understand?
Is this normal behaviour for Filipina woman? Should I be concerned? I just about left her several times about this topic. I even said, choose him or me, she replies, c? I have a hard time relating to this? Any words of advice I would appreciate. Yes I trust her, but you know what guys are like, One day she may be weak or a bit drunk, I am very very stressed over this situation. I should go there and deal with him, he keeps telling her he loves her, to her. I consider that, very unappropiate and I have told my wife that and she snubs that saying I'm not a Filipino so I don't understand. I'm ready to go there and deal with this guy myself the Canadian/American way. Oh I know you guys know what I mean I need advice or input or anything because i'm at the end of my rope.
Thanks.
Here is one reply from a forum member.
Hi CB:
I've read past posts from you about this woman months ago. You were having problems with her then, and you're still having problems with her. First of all, let me tell you that your Filipina lady's attitude truly stinks to high heaven! Her attitude truly sucks and as a man, I don't see why you even tolerate it! She does not sound at all like a Filipina who's truly in love with you...period! Telling you things like, "it's her life until she gets to Canada" and other BS like that! She's got a lot of gall, let me tell you! If it were me, her sorry ass would never get to Canada...not on my nickel! That's because I would have dumped her months ago! You need to dump this girl CB! If you're arguing with her now, and she doesn't listen or is non-cooperative with you, how is she going to behave once she gets to Canada as your wife?
And don't even get me started about this Pinoy guy she's hanging out with, sending him cards, telling you she "loves" him, etc. And you're wanting to go there tp beat him up? Do that and you may find yourself in Filipino jail, or worse yet...dead! If anything, it's your lady who really needs her ass kicked...kicked right out of the freaking door! I don't think any decent, respectful Filipina would behave in this way. Get some gonads between your legs CB, and dump this "trick"once and for all! She's worthless as a Filipina and will only give you problems and hurt you down the road. Why are you hanging on to her so dearly? Are her panties and her crotch lined with gold or something? You don't have to immigrate Filipina troubles CB, even if you are married to her. Divorce her while she's still there, then later seek and find a decent Filipina who'll respect you as a potential husband. There are plenty of other decent Filipinas out there who'll love and respect you as a man and as your wife. Find one!
Sincerely,
Herb
Here is my reply
Hi CB....
I Had to reply to you on this one..whilst reading what everyone has said...it makes me mad to read it...and Doc Hayes advice is sound and clear...and I agree with it.
My wife has a male freind...but he is in the Middle East working...I have met him...he is no threat to me...hahahah..he is a typical educated filipino..and is harmless.
I had a long discussion with her about him..to ensure that he is just a freind..and not a sexual freind..if you get my drift.
As for your wife..having a freindship..and the words "I love him" are used..that is unnaceptable, and innapropriate behaviour for a fine Filipina wife, who is Mahinhin...she knows it..as well.
All her freinds know that..and certainly her family knows it, this only leads to one thing...disaster.
As for going over to stick one on him..I can understand you wanting to do that..if it was me...I would love him to be in my country..I have heard these days..that intensive care is not what it used to be in socialized mediicine.
Some of the ladies on the Forum are quite right to disuade you from going over to the Phils and giving him some hospital treatment, as you may not get in again, I think reading between the lines..your marriage is in big trouble buddy, and when she says, "its my life until i get to Canada", thats an incredible statement to make..its not her llife..now she has a husband..and her life is joined to yours..what the hell is this girl playing at ?? I find the whole story incredible.
As Doc Hayes says, its time to put it on the line...I wouldnt give her an ultimatum...that only backs her into a corner..my advice is this buddy.
1. Are you sending her monthly financial support ?? if so..suspend it, see what happens then.
if she moans or complains...tell her its because you find her behaviour unnacceptable.
2. Remind her..that in your culture..her behaviour is grounds for divorce.
And as for this Filipino having photos of your wife on his cellphone...? that is unbeleivable.
Just one point..I had another female filipina freind, who I got close to in another city, I really enjoyed chatting to her, I told my wife about her..and one day she called me in the city where I was, within that same day...my wife called me to discuss it...she told me in Philippine society, it is not appropriate for a man to have another Filipina freind...and I havent told this one I love her ...got the picture..she also told me..that if I continued to have this freindship..I would put the marriage in jeopardy..I listened to her carefully..and apologized..as I did not know that she felt that way..only when she explained it to me..did I tel her..that I will speak to the other lady..and explain how she felt about it..the other lady understood and said..your wife is right to be concerned..I would be too..so maybe its best if I send goodwill messages through the both of you..and leave it at that.
After that..i have not had any dealings..with the other freind on account of my wifes feelings.
So if this man had any scruples about how you felt..he would drop his freindship with your wife immedeatly..but he has not has he ? also your wife..would drop it as well...she hasnt done so..I think the point has been made CB.
So ! STOP THIS SITUATION BUDDY AND STOP IT NOW
and this one....
Quote:
Are her panties and her crotch lined with gold or something?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH
Way to go buddy !!!!!!
Thought you would all laugh at this one.
Pete
You have to read this one...
Its from a Canadian guy..on the Asawa Forum..
Hi everyone,
Ok, she has a best friend in Butuan where she lives. "He" is 19 and her best friend ever since she was able to kick him of his Crystal Meth habit 3 years ago through talking to him. She tells me she " loves him" as a friend. I have a problem with my wife saying she loves another man. she is VERY close to him and says she loves him more than her own life. Hmm. I have issues about that? I have seen them myself, to close for my liking I'm afraid. She says she considers him a son, yet she is always with him seems 24/7. He has even stayed at her parents home with her, She swears No sex or anything, just friends. But he has fessed up that he loves her more than friendship. My wife knows this, yet she continues to say she loves him..... to him. The Valentines card she sent him blew me away. I have told her to stop saying these things to him, she says, : its my life in Butuan until I come to canada " I will do as I wish, he is a friend only, that is all. I have a problems with this guy. Iam a guy and I know what he wants. Yes, ok truthfully, my wife is absolutely gorgeous and very well endowed and I know what he wants. I saw his cell phone last Dec. 217 pics of my wife on it. Hmm. what should I do? I have asked, told, faught, the silent treatment, everything, nothing works, she just says, she knew him before I knew her and he is her best friend and she loves him. man..... I cant accept that , hearing those words..........Kills me. What should I do? How can I understand?
Is this normal behaviour for Filipina woman? Should I be concerned? I just about left her several times about this topic. I even said, choose him or me, she replies, c? I have a hard time relating to this? Any words of advice I would appreciate. Yes I trust her, but you know what guys are like, One day she may be weak or a bit drunk, I am very very stressed over this situation. I should go there and deal with him, he keeps telling her he loves her, to her. I consider that, very unappropiate and I have told my wife that and she snubs that saying I'm not a Filipino so I don't understand. I'm ready to go there and deal with this guy myself the Canadian/American way. Oh I know you guys know what I mean I need advice or input or anything because i'm at the end of my rope.
Thanks.
Here is one reply from a forum member.
Hi CB:
I've read past posts from you about this woman months ago. You were having problems with her then, and you're still having problems with her. First of all, let me tell you that your Filipina lady's attitude truly stinks to high heaven! Her attitude truly sucks and as a man, I don't see why you even tolerate it! She does not sound at all like a Filipina who's truly in love with you...period! Telling you things like, "it's her life until she gets to Canada" and other BS like that! She's got a lot of gall, let me tell you! If it were me, her sorry ass would never get to Canada...not on my nickel! That's because I would have dumped her months ago! You need to dump this girl CB! If you're arguing with her now, and she doesn't listen or is non-cooperative with you, how is she going to behave once she gets to Canada as your wife?
And don't even get me started about this Pinoy guy she's hanging out with, sending him cards, telling you she "loves" him, etc. And you're wanting to go there tp beat him up? Do that and you may find yourself in Filipino jail, or worse yet...dead! If anything, it's your lady who really needs her ass kicked...kicked right out of the freaking door! I don't think any decent, respectful Filipina would behave in this way. Get some gonads between your legs CB, and dump this "trick"once and for all! She's worthless as a Filipina and will only give you problems and hurt you down the road. Why are you hanging on to her so dearly? Are her panties and her crotch lined with gold or something? You don't have to immigrate Filipina troubles CB, even if you are married to her. Divorce her while she's still there, then later seek and find a decent Filipina who'll respect you as a potential husband. There are plenty of other decent Filipinas out there who'll love and respect you as a man and as your wife. Find one!
Sincerely,
Herb
Here is my reply
Hi CB....
I Had to reply to you on this one..whilst reading what everyone has said...it makes me mad to read it...and Doc Hayes advice is sound and clear...and I agree with it.
My wife has a male freind...but he is in the Middle East working...I have met him...he is no threat to me...hahahah..he is a typical educated filipino..and is harmless.
I had a long discussion with her about him..to ensure that he is just a freind..and not a sexual freind..if you get my drift.
As for your wife..having a freindship..and the words "I love him" are used..that is unnaceptable, and innapropriate behaviour for a fine Filipina wife, who is Mahinhin...she knows it..as well.
All her freinds know that..and certainly her family knows it, this only leads to one thing...disaster.
As for going over to stick one on him..I can understand you wanting to do that..if it was me...I would love him to be in my country..I have heard these days..that intensive care is not what it used to be in socialized mediicine.
Some of the ladies on the Forum are quite right to disuade you from going over to the Phils and giving him some hospital treatment, as you may not get in again, I think reading between the lines..your marriage is in big trouble buddy, and when she says, "its my life until i get to Canada", thats an incredible statement to make..its not her llife..now she has a husband..and her life is joined to yours..what the hell is this girl playing at ?? I find the whole story incredible.
As Doc Hayes says, its time to put it on the line...I wouldnt give her an ultimatum...that only backs her into a corner..my advice is this buddy.
1. Are you sending her monthly financial support ?? if so..suspend it, see what happens then.
if she moans or complains...tell her its because you find her behaviour unnacceptable.
2. Remind her..that in your culture..her behaviour is grounds for divorce.
And as for this Filipino having photos of your wife on his cellphone...? that is unbeleivable.
Just one point..I had another female filipina freind, who I got close to in another city, I really enjoyed chatting to her, I told my wife about her..and one day she called me in the city where I was, within that same day...my wife called me to discuss it...she told me in Philippine society, it is not appropriate for a man to have another Filipina freind...and I havent told this one I love her ...got the picture..she also told me..that if I continued to have this freindship..I would put the marriage in jeopardy..I listened to her carefully..and apologized..as I did not know that she felt that way..only when she explained it to me..did I tel her..that I will speak to the other lady..and explain how she felt about it..the other lady understood and said..your wife is right to be concerned..I would be too..so maybe its best if I send goodwill messages through the both of you..and leave it at that.
After that..i have not had any dealings..with the other freind on account of my wifes feelings.
So if this man had any scruples about how you felt..he would drop his freindship with your wife immedeatly..but he has not has he ? also your wife..would drop it as well...she hasnt done so..I think the point has been made CB.
So ! STOP THIS SITUATION BUDDY AND STOP IT NOW
and this one....
Quote:
Are her panties and her crotch lined with gold or something?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH
Way to go buddy !!!!!!
Thought you would all laugh at this one.
Pete