View Full Version : Being in love with a Filipino Citizen - the real cost !
ginapeterb
29th October 2007, 21:30
Project Filipino - just how much does it really cost ?
Initial estimates UK 15,000 to UK 20,000 or PHP 1.4 Million to Php 1.9 Million.
A couple of years ago, I wrote a piece about the real costs of courting a Filipino citizen long distance, it was transferred over from the old version of the forum we had before, so I was having a think today about renewing some of this information, plus there are many new members on the forum, and since then we have acquired lots of new interested ones.
I am now compiling a new timeline of the true costs of project Philippines, I am sure you will all have a laugh at this one..so read on and have fun.
The object of compiling this new post is to go over some of the experiences I have had, and those of some of my close freinds and colleagues who have shared there experiences with me over the last couple of years.
<div align="center">PROJECT PHILIPPINES</div align>
Stage 1 - Introduction to Project Philippines - Sparring and teasers
The first stage is often not taken into consideration, but there is some cost involved, although not always factored in, sparring is a term often used to describe the initital stages that couples go through when the guy pushes out the teasers to see whether the object of his teasers is interested.
1. Costs of memberships of online dating portals, such as FH CB or AE
(Filipinaheart) (Asianeuro) (Cherry Blossoms) and such as these, cost can be around UK30.00 for a limited number of months memberships.
At this stage there is hardly any noticable impact on your wallet, but hold on...its early days as yet.
2. You decide to start calling her, see increases in your cellphone bill, at 25p per international text, you can spend sometimes UK400.00 a month alone on just texting, dont poo poo it, I know of someone last month who spent over £400.00 on just texting his girl in the Philippines.
3. You start to call her on the 0871 10p or the 7p per minute numbers, these look like a local call on your landline, with BT or NTL or other provider, they can start to increase your landline bill by 70 per cent a month, average costs per month are around £60.00 to £80.00 and that is based on saying good morning to her for about 10 minutes when you wake up to get ready for work, and lncludes saying goodnight to her before you go to bed as she wakes up in the morning.
4. Skype, assuming she is online, (but what if she is not), you can talk for free on skype, but the reality is much different when you consider at the times when you want to reach her, she is not available, or their is a brownout, or the broadband is down, or someone nicked the cables for the broadband in her area.
That normally means it takes PLDT or Bayantel or GLOBE 6 weeks to repair the nicked cables, so you call her on her cellphone on T2 Phone cards or other phone card provider.
Cost of Phone cards, between £10.00 to £20.00 per day, depending on how love sick you are...I know of one British guy who spends about £80.00 a week on phone cards, calls his girl about 4 times a day, and chats on average for about 1 hour per call.
5. Internet charges - broadband fixed fee per month £10.00 to £29.00 depending on deal, one guy I know spends 8 hours a day chatting to his girl, although its free, he upped his bandwidth package from £10.00 to £29.00 on BT Total Broadband Option 4, thus with advance charges and V.A.T. his quarterly bill is over £200.00 with 0871 numbers to call Philippine landlines and mobiles.
Remember you lot out there - this is only the sparring stage, she hasnt said yes to you yet ! And contrary to what you might think, you have no idea whether this is the one as yet, and you have not met.
Stage 2 - The Initial meeting in Philippines
1. Your first vacation fly/try to meet your loved one, this is a requirement that you must have met your intended, this is the minimum requirement for a VAF2 2004 Fiancee visa.
Round trip air tickets to Philippines to Manila/Cebu, between £600.00 to £1000.00 depending on duration of visit, time of year etc.
Accomodation costs in Manila/Cebu/Davao/CGO/Gensan/Tagbiliran/Tacloban/Dumaguete/Bacolod/Zamboanga/Naga/ etc hotel rooms for a 3 week stay around £300.00
Food for your visit x 2, because not only do you require funds for your costs, you must remember, you will also pay for your little flowers costs as well, and her brothers, and her sisters, and her Mothers and her Fathers, unless your girl is an orphan, you need a minimum of £2000.00 for a 3 week flytry.
Any Flytry would not be complete without a trip to Boracay, cost of flights on Asian Spirit to Boracay from Cebu or Manila, costs around £50.00 a return flight, for the two of you, hotel accomodation in Boracay, costs again around £25.00 a night, drinks, meals, boat trips, massages, shopping.
Honey I must have a new cellphone !
A Cellphone for your girl, latest phone, camera phone, latest gadgets, not the old style, they dont want it if its old, they want the latest, costs around £150.00 to £300.00 depending on features, no contracts generally purchased on pay as you go, she will want to be contactable for you.
Gifts and tokens of intent to enter into binding courtship with a view to marriage.
1. Chocolates - Thornton's chocolates or Swiss style chocolates to give to her and her siblings and Tito's and Tita's and cousins.
2. M&M's Chocolates (not bought in Philippines or at NAIA) purchased in UK and carried, good to give out to all the family.
3. Fragrances - purchased in London signature labels, not sub-prime names, from Perfume shops etc, good to give out to Tita's and Sisters of lady.
Fushion power razors, with spare blades, around a fiver a pack, with Shaving cream good for giving out to Tito's (uncles), Tatay (Father) and Kuya's (brothers).
4. Watches, things of E-bay, again good to give siblings such as kuya's (brothers).
5. Canned goods - Tins of Corned Beef, Salami, Corned Beef Hash, Tinned Sardines, a clear winner with Tatay's (Father of the lady)
6. Soaps and shampoos purchased in UK, from boot fairs and flea markets, lots of them, take extra suitcase full of these if you can. (give to your lady - she will distribute for you)
7. Toothpaste, battery operated toothbrushes, get 20 or so for about £3.00 each, again your lady will give them out for you, dont worry, she will find a home for them.
8. England football shirts with 3 lions logo, from sports and soccer, all sizes, small medium and also smaller sizes if possible for nephews in family.
9. T Shirts, all sizes, S M L preferably from London with London motifs on, very good for giving out to family - highly prized (not bought in Philippines) ( bought by you in UK)
10. Deodorant sprays, colognes, after shaves, UK Branded lables, not Filipino, must be purchased by you in UK, highly prized for Brothers, Fathers, Uncles and Nephews.
11.Toblerone chocolate bars, Cadbury's Heroes, Quality Street, Mint chocolates, anything like these, again only from UK.
12. Ear ring sets, fashion ones, accessories, make up sets, again good for female family members, like cousins, Tita's Sisters etc.
All of the above or some of them will be purchased by you at some stage during the courtship, they are generally a demonstration of your regard and respect for the extended family, the thing is, they all cost money.
Stage 3 - Maintaining your girl now she is your fiancee or regular GF
1. Phone bills continue to rise, texting, calling, phone cards, flowers for suprises, gifts by fedex DHL.
2. Monthly allowance for your girl - Php 10,000 to Php 30,000 or if you have deep pockets, Php 50,000 and above. This varies according to affordability.
3. Nail treatments, Hair and beauty treatments, shoes, clothes, all have to be new, she is with a British now, you dont want people to think you cannot afford to maintain her.
Stage 4 - The Marriage in the Philippines Vacation.
1. A Return trip should you choose to marry in the Philippines, this could include Round Trip air tickets, Accommodation, Food, Honeymoon, Wedding costs, etc the cost for this one off expense is around UK 3000.00 to UK 5000.00.
2. Passport photos needed along the way. UK 10.00
3. Passport photos required for you in various forms needed by authorities in Philippines around UK 15.00
4. Cost of submitting An Application on VAFW 2004 for Spouse visa, Php 50,000 or UK 550.00.
5. Cost of obtaining a CNI (Certificate of no Impediment to marriage) in UK, the cost is around £30.00
6. Cost of obtaining a local CNI (Legal Capacity for marriage) in the Philippines - cost will be around £25.00
7. Cost of round trip tickets for you and your loved one to travel from Provinces to attend CFO Seminar (Commission for Filipinos overseas) in Manila/Cebu including hotel. Cost around £150.00
8Cost of CFO Seminar £2.00
9. Cost of new Passport for your loved one, approximately £35.00
10. Cost of Applying for duplicate birth certificates at NSO (National Statistics office) in Philippines is circa £25.00
11. Cost of Marriage License in locality of Marriage if in Philippines £35.00
Cost of Air Ticket for your loved one to Come to UK once visa is approved, from £650.00 to £1000.00
Stage 5 - Project Philippines gets ready for UK arrival.
1. One time cost of buying warm clothes associated with her transit to a colder climate, new Boots, winter clothes, jackets, coats, umbrella, mittens, scarf, woollies, Electric blanket for the bed,
2. Money for a Rice cooker ! £25-45.00
3. Cost of round trip ticket for possible 2nd visit to be available to British Embassy should your presence be required at interview for settlement (VAF2004) Cost including hotels, food, gifts, expenses, £2000-£3000.
4. Despedida de Soltera, (leaving party and goodbye to singleness for the Filipina)
She might want to throw a leaving party for all her friends, work colleagues, and family cost likely to be around £50.00 to £150.00
Arrival in UK
1. Budget for increased telephone usage during first few months when she arrives in UK - calling cards, BT, NTL World, etc, bills increase rapidly cost around £100-£400.00 per month, it soon adds up. Try to use SKYPE.
2. Costs of obtaining special foods for her like, trips to Manila Supermarket, trips to fish markets, etc, obtaining Asian foods, extra cost £100.00 per month. (Filipino branded products are expensive and are imported.)
3. Costs of her own special allowance if on Fiancee visa, (she cannot work) around £50.00 to £250.00 depending on your finances and generosity.
4. Driving lessons if she has a desire to learn to drive on UK roads, £1000.00 to £3000.00 over a 1 year period for driving lessons.
5. Extra insurances for your car, upping your no claims bonus premium from reasonable to extortionate.
6. Heavens forbid she wants a new car, costs for a used car from £1500.00 to £4000.00 or a new car, £7000.00 to £15000.00
7, Increased costs of showing her around, trips to the Capital, Costs of initial 2 months together, entertainment, showing her around, taking her to London, or Manchester or Sheffield, or Cardiff, or Birmingham, or Edinbrough or Glasgow, etc etc, in other words, its costs money to take her around, your visits to places you dont normally go will increase, you have to factor in, that your initial 6 months will be a new time for her.
Stage 6 - The real life commences - Miss Bilmoko !
1. Shopping trips to the mall, forget walks in the country, english historical sites, pubs by the sea, castles and country houses, strolls down the country lane, cycling, walking, get your wallet ready.
2. Bags, shoes, tops, jeans, trousers, shoes, and more shoes, belts, acccessorize, fragrances, boots high leg, be prepared to buy new high leg boots, and a partridge in a pear tree.
3. Remittances back home for urgent requests.
Expect to have to send some money back home to Philippines for susento for the extended family, dont think it wont happen to you, or my girl never asks me for anything.
Sustento, write it in your diary, it can be from £100.00 to £250.00 per month.
4. Extra sustento for life threatening emergencies, such as Doctor bill, hospital fees, surgeons fees, broken roofs, typhoon damage, sick caribao vet bills ( that was my joke) they dont really ask you for that.
5. The investing Filipina - Honey we should get into real estate.
Consider money for house and lot, but more for multiple lots, investment property, gold jewellry for investment purposes.
Swarosvki, Tagheuer watches, Calvin Klein, Armani, Juicy Couture, Mulberry, Chloe, and Dolce and Gabanna, 14 or 18 carat gold items in case of financial difficulty, they can always be pawned when money is short.
6. Be prepared for the jeepney business, or the tricylce business, put money aside for purchasing a tri-cycle for brother, or a female caribao for the family.
I cant think of anything further, but last but not least, the anulment, you might have to stump up a further Php 180,000 to 220,000 for her anulment, and just hope you are not one of them.
If anyone can think of anything else, I am all ears, Ive seen it all and Ive witnessed it all.
Best of luck those who come after me...
Now what did I say was it 15,000 or 20,000
Anecdote
In august this year, I was sitting with a friend of mine from the British expat community in Bacolod City, Visayas, we were sitting in Bobs having a coffee, when all of sudden we noticed an American sitting at a table having a coke, about 5 minute later we observed a young Filipina come in to see him and sat at his table, they exchanged eye contact, a little chikka, and then she ordered a drink.
You could see he was excited to see her, she was fluttering her eyelids, he was all smiles, they had obviously just met, maybe he had come to Phils just to see her for his fly/try.
My good freind John, who is in his 70's and has lived in Philippines for about 10 years leaned over and said, "You know Pete, I do hope that girl is an orphan for his sake
The 2 of us gave out a huge laughter and carried on, lamenting on the fact, that our girls families were very compact and small, and we thank God for being so fortunate in that situation.
bigtombowski
29th October 2007, 21:36
is this based on your experience peter?
ginapeterb
29th October 2007, 21:40
Tom,
Its based on a compilation of experiences, some of my own, some of one or two of my best pals who have Filipino wives of some years, and various others that have written to me, I would say there are about 20 or 30 experiences here rolled into one peice of written work, why do you ask ?
bigtombowski
29th October 2007, 21:47
it is coz i read your original piece on this when i was considering a relationship with a filipina, and i am 8 months into the relationship now, and i am keen to know more about the amount it's gonna cost me to pursue this relationship to it's fullest conclusion :) -- a happy marriage :D
how much did u end up spending?? (conservative estimate adjusted for inflation please) -- if i am not being too personal and nosey:)
thank you
tom
andypaul
29th October 2007, 21:51
Don't forget the little mistakes your wife makes like accidentally ringing phill on her mobile or landline:bigcry:
Or the effort you go to rush out to a western union or transfer money to an account so the emgency is dealt with. Every month i go let me know a few days in advance when they need to pay schools, tutor or some other fees every month its left to the last mintue:doh
bigtombowski
29th October 2007, 22:07
gosh hehehe
andypaul
29th October 2007, 22:20
gosh hehehe
I can't give you a figure because every situation and familly is different.
My advice is go into mega saving mode. Like Pete writes so well the heating bill, phone bill will be much higher. Also what will Mars do when she is here at first? Dvd hire, magazines snacks more snacks. You will suddenly notice Phill foods, fresh fruits and veg your wife may require for dishs cost more at various times of the year. Our local green grocer due to the local huge imgriant population holds fruits i have never heard of, but things like the phill type mangos might cost 6 pound a box:omg: If your not so lucky to have one in yourt high street you might have to travel a fair old distance.
I would say for us the first three months was ultra expensive due to no ones fault but settling in to a british winter is hard for me and i have 30 odd years exerience let a lone a phil who only felt these temperatures in the freezer before coming to the UK 6 thousand miles or so from home.
Then does your Wife want to carry on her studies, if she gets a job or studies you will need to sub her travel, food and possibly work clothes. When the wife first got a job in a neighbouring town a few occasions when doing earlies she needed a cab as waiting for a Bus at that time was to much for her to handle (She would have done it but you don't let your wife almost freeze to death do you?). All little things which a british born or raised person may not think about.
Another cost to bear in mind is i would advise getting a pay monthly phone or buy a lot of credit for her payg so she has proper freedom. My wife would have little worries or just want to ring up someone when traveling to the shops. My wifes first trip to a UK corner shop (three streets away) involved three phone calls before, during and after.
bigtombowski
29th October 2007, 22:28
thank u for that well thought out post andy :D
tom
andypaul
29th October 2007, 22:44
thank u for that well thought out post andy :D
tom
Thought out:omg: im wandering round our flats kitchen working out where the shelves and other ikea bits should go.
When people ask about applying as a couple with no savings or decent income i just shudder as it could cause so many problems for the two of them.
bigtombowski
29th October 2007, 23:09
of course it would! lol
imagine marrying someone here, on the dole,
then multiply it by 1000X lol
tom
ginapeterb
29th October 2007, 23:26
Some of you want to know what it cost me for project Philippines, well I can tell you roughly give or take £500.00 I have spent about £45,000 in the last 4 years on project Philippines, that includes requests for money, life threatening tragedies, jeepneys, carry vans, tricyles, caribaos, agricultural land, chicken farms, and anything else you can think of, including school fees for siblings, and agency fees for foreign travel.
Yep about £45,000 someone once said to me "Pete when does it stop"?
I replied "It never stops...it just goes on and on "
andypaul
29th October 2007, 23:44
Never worked it out exactly but that doesn't suprise me.
Tom i would defintely suggest having at least best bit of 3 to 4 months wages saved in the bank after your missus is here. Thats not to pay off ccs from your trip or mars flight over, but to ensure you have no probs helping her settle in.
If you did o/t or unsocial hours at work when Mars was in Phill suddenly you cant do it to her a little extra (firstly you dont want to and Mars will want you home asap). This could dent your income possibly.
The rest is just for normal settling of a couple in making a bacholer pad into a couples home.
Im sure your be ok you found this site early on and seem to have a sensible head on your shoulders.
kimmi
30th October 2007, 00:07
thats an informative post Peter, and i am now thinking what happened with my fiance's savings..he he he
but still we're glad that i dont need to go through annulment and that almost save him a £..
joyce
30th October 2007, 04:34
Some of you want to know what it cost me for project Philippines, well I can tell you roughly give or take £500.00 I have spent about £45,000 in the last 4 years on project Philippines, that includes requests for money, life threatening tragedies, jeepneys, carry vans, tricyles, caribaos, agricultural land, chicken farms, and anything else you can think of, including school fees for siblings, and agency fees for foreign travel.
Yep about £45,000 someone once said to me "Pete when does it stop"?
I replied "It never stops...it just goes on and on "
You are so generous Pete....Gina is very lucky to have you as her husband..:)
empott
30th October 2007, 05:25
:omg: That's too extravagant, Peter! Are there really girls like that?:doh
On my case, my husband sends me allowance but i told him to stop sending (unless i need the money so bad). For me, paying the remittance charge of WU is a waste of money. Its better that he saved it and just spend it when i am there.
When i was still single, i do shopping alot. My mom always say that i am a high maintenance daughter. Lol But after getting married and tried living alone, i now see & know the value of money. I don't feel right spending my husband's money while he is there working his :butthead: off even in a freezing weather. It's just not reasonable to be spending his hard earned money over trivial things.
IMO, Filipinas should not take advantage of the generosity of their fiances and husbands. Practicality and helping each other is important for a harmonious relationship.
Bridget
30th October 2007, 06:26
:omg: That's too extravagant, Peter! Are there really girls like that?:doh It's just not reasonable to be spending his hard earned money over trivial things.
IMO, Filipinas should not take advantage of the generosity of their fiances and husbands. Practicality and helping each other is important for a harmonious relationship.
I think Empott is right.:xxgrinning--00xx3: Girls should not take advantage of the generosity of their fiance or husband. When I have a regular job, I do not have financial support from my fiance. I spend my own hard-earned money if I want to buy things for myself. As for the support for the girl`s family, I`ve read some stories in the internet about foreign boyfriend become the fiancial provider not only to his filipina girlfriend or fiancee but as extend to the girl`s family, I think that is not really nice except if its the guy initiates to do it to help his gf`s family, maybe if he is so rich and really do not know what to do to his money. In my situation, I know my fiance`s financial status, given that he have some investments and personal savings and lives on his own in his own house , as much as possible Im trying to help him to save. For instance when were having holidays together, I never asked him to book an expensive hotel or bring me to expensive restaurants as long as were happy together it does not matter even we stayed in not five star hotel. When I flew to UK, I chose the cheapest flight even it was a long journey, when he ask me what do I want for my birthday, I did not ask him anything, he sent me fresh 12 red roses which I did appreciate and made me so happy.
If he asked me to buy what I want whenever were walking around the shops in the city, I hardly get things for myself unless it is necessarry such as if I need a dress for special occassion, but aside from that Im happy to spend my own money. I think that this is really my nature that Im happy to work and earn to buy what I want for myself rather than to ask him to give me money to spend. But now, I have to give up my job abroad to sort out my visa application and to spend time with my family before going back to England, he offered me a monthly financial support which is just fair. Im happy, he help me to have internet access at home, he even paid the half of the amount of my laptop. I believed that he does not need to spend a million pesos to prove me his sincerity and love to me. He`s there thru thick and thin, giving me moral support when Im troubled and lift me up when Im down. His constant love and care is more important to me than any material things that money could buy. I do not care even I can not afford to buy expensive signature brands of bags, shoes, clothes and etc what I care most is we always have a great time chatting, playing games online everyday. Guess what, I always beat him in scrabble...:xxgrinning--00xx3:
So Guyz not all filipinas are materialistic, infact we are very easy to please.. You do not need to spend a million to impress us, just treat us fairly and respect us as woman we are happy and we`ll be very proud of you.:)
ervenescence
30th October 2007, 07:35
Wheeww!..grabe ang hangin naman dito..LOLZ
My husband would never brag of what damage that it cost or how much money does he spent to me.
We both work together, I used my own money to sent some to my family, and buy some of my needs. I admit he shoulder most of the expenses here in the house because he earns more than me and we both agreed with that.
btw...nice post Bridget :xxgrinning--00xx3:
Bridget
30th October 2007, 07:43
Wheeww!..grabe ang hangin naman dito..LOLZ
My husband would never brag of what damage that it cost or how much money does he spent to me.
Thats right. I agreeman should not count how much they spent for their woman at the end of the day if you are happy with your wife or fiancee every cents, pesos or pounds worth.
btw...nice post Bridget :xxgrinning--00xx3:
Thanks ervenescence.:) Cheers to all smart and beautiful filipinas here!:xxgrinning--00xx3:
cinmickey28
30th October 2007, 07:53
I agree with you guys! Maybe there are some fiance and husbands who spends a lot because they ended up with materialistic and very high maintenance women and family who just want to "receive" and "receive". Good if it is being spend in the right way and not luxuriosly as they have been supported or they can have somebody to turn to when in need. Or if they are materialistic it comes from their own pocket if they work.
But for those who can live a simple way I think it will not be as expensive as it is and especially if the wife or fiancee has a decent work in the Philippines or work there in the UK.
I know of some women who have also change their lifestyles soon after marrying a foreigner or meeting foreign fiance in which is really wrong. Hope change is for the better and not the worst.
On my view, if a Pinay is being with her man out of love then she will not be taking advantage of his generosity but help and cooperate him for their future together.
With regards to investments, I think it might be okey also for as long as you will really reap the fruit of it. So, I think it still depend on the Pinay the foreign man is with. Lots have still "hiya" on not to take adavantage.
Bridget
30th October 2007, 08:11
I agree with you guys! Maybe there are some fiance and husbands who spends a lot because they ended up with materialistic and very high maintenance women and family who just want to "receive" and "receive".
I know of some women who have also change their lifestyles soon after marrying a foreigner or meeting foreign fiance in which is really wrong. Hope change is for the better and not for worse. So, I think it still depend on the Pinay the foreign man is with. Lots have still "hiya" on not to take adavantage.
Correct:xxgrinning--00xx3:
A decent woman will not take advantage of the generosity of her bf. It also depends on the up bringing of the girlfriend. My parents taught me the value of hard work and wise spending. Im not ashame if someone will call me kuripot or thrifty, as I do not believe in spending more where I can spend less, I know girls you know what I mean. When my fiance met me four years ago I was working and Im just a simple filipina, not fussy and why should I change now? I see some filipina that becomes very high society girl the moment they have foreigner bf or fiance or hubby, they completely forget where they come from and even show to everyone that she is now rich, having extravagant life,but who knows her BF whose sending her money is having a hardtime to pay his debts or credit cards and in the end they will both suffer in the future when they eventually get married. I believed that if a woman,really loves her BF, fiance or hubby she will value every penny that her man gave to her and not to impress your whole community that you have this and that.:)
Cheers!
ginapeterb
30th October 2007, 08:29
Listen you girls, before you start moralizing on my Gina, the post I made does not indicate that my wife is materialistic money grabbing, shoes bags and gucci.
I was trying to indicate just how much the whole process can cost you, there is also some tongue in cheek and for laughs alone indications of what other things can be costed out, in different situations.
In fact, the post indicates a variety of experiences put to me over the last few years, some good some bad.
I know of one girl where the BF was sending her regularly P100,000 a month, thats more than I ever sent my girl, but he can afford it, and he is happy to do so, the politics of envy are not neccessary in this situation.
As for me, I love spending my hard earned money on my girl...she makes me happy, and she is worth it...and you girls make me laugh really with your posts about:
"Oh he doesnt have to do that for me, he just has to blah blah blah....come on you lot.....are you telling me if your numbers came up on the lotto, you would give it all back...cos youre not that kind of girl"
Kahit walang ang pera, ko ang maligaya, bastaat mahal ako
And thats my Tagalog...whether wrong gramatically, I think its readable...
Are you really telling me, that you came all that way from Philippines to live a worse life than you had before, cos if you are saying that
I don't believe you
Some readers come on and tell me "My fiance does not provide financial support for me, I spend my own money"
I dont know what they are trying to say, but generally, they are trying to make up for some deficiency in the guy they chose, when they found out, he is cheap and tight, and reklamo's all the time about giving her some dosh, dont bother with that statement, it wont work on me.
Stop moralizing and enjoy the thread....its meant to be funny !
Someone has written "They know of girls who changed their lifestyle after meeting a foreigner"
Ano ba ?? what did you think they would do then, start having 40 pesos lunches with the foreigner, decline his cellphone gift offer, refuse his offer of a new set of clothes when he is in country on holidays, hand back the ring he bought for her cos its too expensive, pay for the dinner out from her own pocket, cos she is worried hubby might be spending too much........honestly stop it, you are making me cry.
One of you said "He even pays for half of my laptop" great he is a 50 50 man then, good for him, well thats a nice gesture, I have a pal who just bought his Thai girlfreind a new laptop, admittedly he didnt ask her to pay the other 50 per cent, I also bought my lady a laptop computer, but I paid in full.
Empott i named you because your post is reasonable, you said you felt that you did not want to spend your husbands money cos he is out in the cold working hard, hmmm sounds to me like you have a nice hubby dear, he wont mind spending his money on his little flower, cos he thinks you are the love of his life....so if he wants to pamper you...let him do it, its his way of making you happy, its not about the money or how much he has, its about what he does with it, money is only a method of exchange in a modern society, you dont have to have lots of it to make another happy, sometimes it might just be a bunch of roses, chocolates, or a nice top for you, or something to say I love you.
I dont have lots of money myself really, but I enjoy using it to make my honey happy, the only thing I would say, is that without that method of exchange its so hard to buy my honey a new panties, or a pair of jeans or shoes, so money has to be had.
She is not asking for anything as you are not, its mainly me who suggests things, she is very much like some of you, she would rather work and make money to help herself, but as one of you has said, she does not make enough to make any significant impact on our household budget, so naturally I take care of all the bills and other costs.
I did not bring my girl from the Philippines to pay bills and work hard, in fact I tried to prevent her from working, but she is bored at home and wants to work, with her money she helps her family, and she is so happy doing that, she sends money every month, as they are so poor in the Philippines, and I can see her face when she sends that money...she is contented and proud.
So whoever felt I was bragging, that is not the case, I was merely trying to look at the true cost of courting someone from across the world, and dont think its only for the Philippines, I have two friends who are engaged to Thai girls and they tell me the cost is similar if not higher.
ginapeterb
30th October 2007, 09:05
You are so generous Pete....Gina is very lucky to have you as her husband..:)
Joyce thank you for that, we dont have big money Joyce, but you know I am a realist, I promised my Gina a better life, than she had in Philippines, my Gina had a very responsible position in the Philippines, but the job just does not pay enough, I just tried to make it better, we are not milionaires, but hey Joyce...if my numbers come up...
I promise you, it wont change me hehehehehehehehehe
andypaul
30th October 2007, 09:06
Like pete says it is expensive and guys need to have their eyes open to the money it can or could cost. With a recession looming it may not be so easy to find a job once phils come over. Also my wife at first was unable to work as most ladies find for the first few months. My wife was in uni when we first met no way could she afford a laptop just as most uk students couldnt.
ginapeterb
30th October 2007, 09:11
Stop press, someone who shall be nameless said they heard that foreigners become the provider for thier girls family.
Well then Guilty as charged your Majesty, since I am one who does that, I am proud to support my Father in law in the Philippines, I pay for his meds, and I bought him a truck for his business.
He loves me like no other, and I see the look in his eyes when he catches sight of me at the airport, he always comes to meet me, even though he is not well, he throws his arms around me and cuddles me, he never stops talking about his son in law in London.
He burns everyones ears with it, now he has a business he can make money from, he runs a delivery business, its not much, but the truck has changed his life.
When my Father in Law received his delivery truck, he cried, where can you buy that happiness,..its priceless and the money to make it happen
Who cares about that.....!!
Bridget
30th October 2007, 09:37
I can see your point of view Kuya Pete about your aim on bringing up that issue about the cost of courtships. I know that it will help to enlighten those men that are just starting or trying to look for their soulmates from abroad particularly from the Philippines. I understand that those things that you mentioned in your first post are mixture of experienced of those people you know as you said. Theres nothing wrong to be generous to the people you love especially to your wife. And you are indeed a good example of a loving and thoughtful husband.
I just wanted to clarify, that those comments I`ve posted is not pertaining to your wife. This is just a forum and should not take it personally. Everyone can give their opinions and views in every issue.
Thanks
Bridge
Gie
30th October 2007, 09:43
oh well, I hope my hubby didnt spend as much as that! I am living a simple life in the Philippines and like what Pete said no matter how hard you work in the Philippines, it just doesnt pays enough. Working here in the UK makes my family's life in the Philippines better and I would not deny that before my husband was sending me money and helping out my family. But now that I've got my own job, I am the one sending them money, it makes me feel contented knowing that my family on the other side of the world is well as me.
ginapeterb
30th October 2007, 09:45
Hello Bridget, no offence taken, you see I am a realist, I guess you could call me the Pragmatic Eleanor in Sense and Sensibility, (have you read the book or seen the movie) its good, its about the plight of young ladies in 18 century England, you see back then Bridget, ladies born to the ranks of the gentleman, who did not have a legacy of good fortune, only had their charms in life to recommend them.
A man who was in possession of an inherited fortune was in want of a wife, generally, he would secure a match with a woman of good breeding, she would be from a wealthy family, and be in possession of her own fortune, i.e. her dowry.
Girls who did not have a dowry, or an annuity, would have only their charms to recommend them.
Eleanor was one such lady, she had no fortune, and by the standards of the day was fairly poor, but also she was pragmatic, I am like her, I tell it as it is, not with the romantic overtures of phrases such as
"Well dont worry we can live on love"
Thats all very well, but the realities of life are not quite like that, and love cannot sustain you when the council tax demand is on the doorstep.
So I am just being realistic and pragmatic if you like, about the relationship betweeen a Filipina and her western husband.
oh and by the way, I was telling Gina about what you all said this morning, and she laughed and said, "tell them I am high maintenance" and by the way, I like DIOR !!
That was her parting comment as she left for work.
cinmickey28
30th October 2007, 09:46
Sorry Sir Pete, if got offended on the post but it’s nothing personal and above all not pointing to your Gina.
As you posted in general situation with your reply to Tom that “ Its based on a compilation of experiences, some of my own, some of one or two of my best pals who have Filipino wives of some years, and various others that have written to me, I would say there are about 20 or 30 experiences here rolled into one peice of written work” therefore my reply to your post Sir Pete is in general situation as well based on observations with friends and acquaintances and it is also case to case bases depending on every situation and depending on the person, the reason that I pointed out “A changed to better and not to worst”.
But again nothing personal with the post Sir Pete. I’m sorry if got misunderstood.
Bridget
30th October 2007, 09:48
Mountain Climbing
If money is your concern, just climb Ben Nevis
Just a train ride from Scotland and little equipment needed
If you want the top challenge, climb the Mount Everest
Climbing Mount Everest would give you a greater sense of achievement and more pleasure
A permit to climb cost 30,000 pounds
Then you have to buy housands of pounds of equipment and get to nepal
Likewise
If you want a cheap girlfriend, go to the local pub on a Saturday night
If you want someone from abroad, you have to be prepared for the costs:)
ginapeterb
30th October 2007, 09:54
Sorry Sir Pete, if got offended on the post but it’s nothing personal and above all not pointing to your Gina.
ABut again nothing personal with the post Sir Pete. I’m sorry if got misunderstood.
Hi kapitid na babae I guard my Gina like a rottweiler, so watch out hehehe, but hey its ok, I am not offended, I like a good debate, thats why I write the way I do, if you look, whenever I post for a debate, it always brings lots of viewpoints, and sometimes I can be a little controversial, thats fine, it all brings for a good debate, but sometimes with me, you tend to get a more direct response.
In other words, when I read something that is clearly beating around the bush, you will get a straight and direct rebuttle, if I think what you said, is unrealistic.
My Gina is quite happy being the object of the discussion, although the posts are not based on her, she did tell me to tell you all, that she is high maintenance, (sounds like a Ferrari) and she knows it, but then we cannot have 2 elephants inthe family.
We already have 1 elephant in the house, so its good that we can spend our money on the one who is not an elephant, and as long as she stays size 10 she will get new clothes, the minute she gets above size 10, the clothes stop...
Thats fair di ba !
cinmickey28
30th October 2007, 10:07
Thanks Sir Pete! That is what I like in this forum aside that this is very helpful with the visa thing I have learned a lot of information and yes Sir Pete, I am convince “Ganyan kayo magmahal! Grabe!!!! You will really fight for love and that reminds me of my Darling. I will soon invite him to join in here.
KeithD
30th October 2007, 10:15
Holidays cost TWICE as much, as you are taking two.......so I've had to cut down to 3 countries a year :bigcry: :rolleyes:
Driving lessons - £3000 if they are clever, £10,000 if they are not.......is the wife behind me? :omg:
My electric bill use to be £12 a week when on my own in a flat, now it's around £40/wk.......although that may have something to do with running computers 24/7 that would put NASA to shame :icon_lol:
I never think of the money, I'd only spend it on something else if the missus wasn't here..........women, beer, drugs.....and waste the rest :D
ginapeterb
30th October 2007, 10:27
Keith excellent post as always, I have this mate of mine, his Filipino wife has been having driving lessons for 6 months, and guess what after spending £2000.00 on lessons she still has to ask
Honey which foot goes on the clutch, is it the left or right
Heavens help us....!!!
eula mackay
30th October 2007, 11:36
We already have 1 elephant in the house, so its good that we can spend our money on the one who is not an elephant, and as long as she stays size 10 she will get new clothes, the minute she gets above size 10, the clothes stop...
Thats fair di ba !
You sound like my husband:Cuckoo:
ginapeterb
30th October 2007, 11:50
Eula,
Am I ? well when I wake up in the morning, there is not a better sight than a slim curved size 10 going in the shower, the only problem for her is when Mr Octupus hands is around.
Women always complain about men grabbing their pwet, the women who suffer most with this is flight attendants, hehehehehe,
Size 10 is the limit, size 8 is nice, hahaha, but she will never be a size 8 I DONT THINK.
Nope size 10 is the limit, size 12, and she is in danger, size 14, and she will be going Vicky Belo for lipo surgery...hehehe
Hehehehe
joebloggs
30th October 2007, 12:05
rough cost for visa's, air tickets, phone bill, uni fees, helping her family, wedding in philippines over 7 years, has cost me at least £45k+ :cwm24::NoNo::doh
oh driving lessons and tests cost me £1,500 but she passed on friday !!! :xxgrinning--00xx3::Cuckoo:
vbkelly
30th October 2007, 12:10
Eula,
Am I ? well when I wake up in the morning, there is not a better sight than a slim curved size 10 going in the shower, the only problem for her is when Mr Octupus hands is around.
Women always complain about men grabbing their pwet, the women who suffer most with this is flight attendants, hehehehehe,
Size 10 is the limit, size 8 is nice, hahaha, but she will never be a size 8 I DONT THINK.
Nope size 10 is the limit, size 12, and she is in danger, size 14, and she will be going Vicky Belo for lipo surgery...hehehe
Hehehehe
hahahha you like my hubby aswell he said to me if i gain my size to 10 or 12 after i gave birth to my child, he gonna send me in the 118 118.com to have an exercise lol
KeithD
30th October 2007, 12:30
oh driving lessons and tests cost me £1,500 but she passed on friday !!! :xxgrinning--00xx3::Cuckoo:
Any chance she can take it on behalf of my missus? :D
Gie
30th October 2007, 12:38
is it really that expensive? driving lessons and test?:omg::omg::omg:
Bridget
30th October 2007, 12:38
We had holidays in Hong Kong on 3 occasions, we`ve been to Macau and China,he took me to the channel Islands in the UK, we always have weekend getaways when I was with him in England, he came to the Phils 3 times and I`ve been to the UK twice. I can`t imagine how much money my fiance had spent for four years,
but he said "its only money,I can earn it again anyway, and I would spend it to something else if you did n`t come to my life." He`s wonderful.
I think,In this kind of relationship, man mostly sacrificed their pockets, but filipina sacrificed their time for their love ones back home.
Can you give a thought for a second of how it is sad for your filipina wife or fiancee to leave her family to be with you there in the UK.
So for most filipinas it is just their happiness to send money or presents to their love -ones back home, because that is one way for her to share her love to them.
Can you imagine, her feelings when she just arrived to your country, when you left her alone at home as you have to go to work and she have to bear the loneliness for 8 hours while you are at work. She have no friends and relatives. She is adjusting herself to everything.
I can imagine, some are crying, but they never tell their husband or fiance because she doesnt want him to feel guilty of taking her away from her country.
For few months, she can`t get a job as fiancee visa not allowed to work, it is not very easy to adjust especially to those who got used to work. Not to mentioned the profession she`ve gave up to make the relationships works, even she did not recieved enough from that job ,but she had spent years and a lot of effort and been happy with that job with her closest friends around.
I think this is really two-way, its one way and another both did sacrificed to get to the goal to have someone to love to and beloved. Both needs have been met, you both happy to each other and willing to fight for the love who cares who earn who spend, the most important is you are happy now.
Are you?
KeithD
30th October 2007, 13:15
My wife is trying to hit the jackpot in the Euro Lottery, she says the €30 Million will go some way to pay off her fruit & fish bill :icon_lol:
ginapeterb
30th October 2007, 14:08
Bridget,
I think this is really two-way, its one way and another both did sacrificed to get to the goal to have someone to love to and beloved. B
I absolutely agree with you, you made a very nice post, its certainly in line with my thoughts, and I have nothing further to add to what you said, because its all true.
Bridget
30th October 2007, 14:13
Bridget,
I absolutely agree with you, you made a very nice post, its certainly in line with my thoughts, and I have nothing further to add to what you said, because its all true.
Thanks Pete. You`ve put a good topic. Cheers...
joebloggs
30th October 2007, 14:45
Any chance she can take it on behalf of my missus? :D
while mw wife was driving for a year on her internatoinl license, she drove more than 8000 miles, and not 1 problem, also she had must have been 30-40 lessons.
i wasn't going to say this, as i will be dead if she ever reads this, she has never failed an exam in her life, until she took her practical driving test, took her 7 times.. :doh, shes not told her mom, becuase shes too embarrassed it took her so many times...
well most of it was just bad luck, worse she had was 2 majors, mostly just 1 major that cost her a fail, some of her 1 fails was
stuck behind a tractor, yes a :censored: farmer in Manchester !!!, he indicated to her to overtake him, but she was coming to a turning in a road and took too long, so she got a major.
another time for going too slow :icon_lol:, i know your suppose to go show the examiner you can handle the car near to the speed limit, but how can you judge this one. slow for how long,??
another time, turning right into a one way street, she turned from the left side of the road, and not the right side, cost her a fail.
another time, at a mini round about, she stopped at it to let a guy at the junction to her right go, she signalled him to go, he didnt move, about 10 seconds later she moved on to the around about , and so did he at the same time, and got a fail for it.
but come monday, all was going good til she came a round about, and some lunatic speeding nearly crashed into her, the examiner told her it wasn't her fault, and to take a break for a few mins, knee knocking :D, she carried on and at the end, the examiner told her she passed :xxgrinning--00xx3:
so respect to her for not quitting, a fearless filipina .. proud she didn't , now she can go and paint the gutters :xxgrinning--00xx3:
joebloggs
30th October 2007, 14:51
Bridget,
I absolutely agree with you, you made a very nice post, its certainly in line with my thoughts, and I have nothing further to add to what you said, because its all true.
yes your right there, when i use to moan at the money we were spending, more like 'wasting' , she would say 'its only money ' :NoNo:, well don't things change whne i take most of her wages off her to pay the bills :icon_lol:
anyway, it will be pay back time, when she finds a fulltime job, she be earning alot more than me, and it will be her money i'll be spending :D, i'll remind her 'its only money' :icon_lol:
Pepe n Pilar
30th October 2007, 15:42
What a lenghty post GinapeterB. This line made me chuckle.
My good friend John, who is in his 70's and has lived in the Phils for about 10 years leaned over and said, "You know Pete, I do hope that girl is an orphan for his sake":icon_lol::icon_lol::icon_lol:
Pepe n Pilar
30th October 2007, 15:47
Keith excellent post as always, I have this mate of mine, his Filipino wife has been having driving lessons for 6 months, and guess what after spending £2000.00 on lessons she still has to ask
Honey which foot goes on the clutch, is it the left or right
Heavens help us....!!!
:icon_lol::icon_lol::icon_lol::cwm12::cwm12::cwm12::BouncyHappy::BouncyHappy::BouncyHappy:
Bridget
30th October 2007, 16:01
:icon_lol::icon_lol::icon_lol::cwm12::cwm12::cwm12::BouncyHappy::BouncyHappy::BouncyHappy:
:icon_lol::icon_lol::icon_lol:
ginapeterb
30th October 2007, 16:28
An englishman trying to teach a Filipina how to drive.
1. Honey I want you to start the vehicle and back the vehicle out and place it in the parking space to your immediate left.
Answer: :doh
2. Honey the left pedal is the clutch, the middle pedal is the brake, the right pedal is the accelerator.
3. Now honey I want you to start the vehicle and dont do anything else.
Honey I Had not really wanted to cover reversing the vehicle at this point, I only asked you to start the vehicle.
4. Ok now the engine is running, I want you to check your mirrors for allround observation.
Honey the mirrors are for all round observation, not for you to fix your make up.
5. Ok now I would want you to use the turn signal indicator and inform other road users which way they will expect you to manouever the vehicle.
Honey please there is no need to put on the windscreen wipers, its fine today and not raining.
6. Ok honey now you have indicated you will reverse left, and you have engaged reverse gear, that is good, now slowly raise the clutch and engage the clutch plate, you will hear the sound of the engine dip in response to your engaging the gearbox.
Honey this vehicle is not designed by the manufacturer to snorkel under water so why did you drive down the river bank and into the river.
7. Honey thank God we have RAC AUTOCLUB, or that reversing experience would have been very expensive now I want you to put the gear into 1st and slowly ease the clutch out, to let us pull out.
I know honey you cannot see your foot coming out, you are not supposed to see it, you are supposed to feel it.
8. Ok now you have pulled away, keep checking your mirrors for good all round observation.
What do you mean you cannot see through the windscreen ?
9. Honey I would like you to keep between the 2 white lines on your side of the road, steer the vehicle straight and do not veer into oncoming traffic.
Honey you are training to drive a car, not to be a Submarine commander.
10. No honey this vehicle is not set up to drive into rivers, its because you keep turning the steering wheel to the nearside of the road, wherever you turn it, the car will go.
"you dont think I am a very good teacher - ahah ok, so are you saying you would not want me to teach you ?
11. You hate me ! ah ok, and dont want to speak to me...hmmmmm paradise.
Honey you told me you had 14 hours lessons in the Philippines, just exactly what did your instructor cover ?
joebloggs
30th October 2007, 16:53
yes, my wife told me she could drive when she first came to the uk, pleaded with me to let her get the car out of the backgarden, after telling me she could easily do it, within a few mins the passenger side door was rammed again the gate post :doh.. and after pleading with me for days, saying she could do it this time, i let her try again, same again, car rammed against the post, oh it is difficult to get the car out of the garden,,, anyway thats when i made her take 30+ lessons :xxgrinning--00xx3:
andypaul
30th October 2007, 21:38
My wife is trying to hit the jackpot in the Euro Lottery, she says the €30 Million will go some way to pay off her fruit & fish bill :icon_lol:
So thats a weeks bill sorted out if you win the jackpot:xxgrinning--00xx3:
aromulus
30th October 2007, 21:49
yes, my wife told me she could drive when she first came to the uk, pleaded with me to let her get the car out of the backgarden, after telling me she could easily do it, within a few mins the passenger side door was rammed again the gate post :doh.. and after pleading with me for days, saying she could do it this time, i let her try again, same again, car rammed against the post, oh it is difficult to get the car out of the garden,,, anyway thats when i made her take 30+ lessons :xxgrinning--00xx3:
Get rid of the gate post...........
Problem solved.........
my 10% commission now please, before the bailiffs come around your house...
andypaul
30th October 2007, 21:55
Get rid of the gate post...........
Problem solved.........
my 10% commission now please, before the bailiffs come around your house...
Yeah Joe what a crazy thing to do having a gate post in your garden:Rasp:
empott
31st October 2007, 03:14
Empott i named you because your post is reasonable, you said you felt that you did not want to spend your husbands money cos he is out in the cold working hard, hmmm sounds to me like you have a nice hubby dear, he wont mind spending his money on his little flower, cos he thinks you are the love of his life....so if he wants to pamper you...let him do it, its his way of making you happy, its not about the money or how much he has, its about what he does with it, money is only a method of exchange in a modern society, you dont have to have lots of it to make another happy, sometimes it might just be a bunch of roses, chocolates, or a nice top for you, or something to say I love you.
Yeah, he is indeed a good man with a good heart, Peter. He is a good husband and i know that he just want to make me happy. I do very much appreciate that. But those material things is not that important if we r far from each other. All i want is to be with him either here or in UK.
Oh btw, when i wrote that post, Peter, I was talking in general and just writing my insight and experience. I wasn't referring to Gina. I read from ur other posts how much u love ur wife and I can see from that post that u were talking in jest. And from ur reply to Tom, i know that u were not referring to ur wife. But if I offended her in any way, i apologize, Peter. I don't mean no harm.
Its based on a compilation of experiences, some of my own, some of one or two of my best pals who have Filipino wives of some years, and various others that have written to me, I would say there are about 20 or 30 experiences here rolled into one peice of written work, why do you ask ?
bluegirl
31st October 2007, 09:59
For me, it all depends on the situation and the family. Not all filipinas who married to a foreigner husband are having a better life I know some pinays that they regret their decision but because they do not want to get embarass to their family back home they just bear the life she have here in the UK.
One pinays, told me her story; she met the guy thru the internet, the guy came to the Phils and propose to her, and because she was desperately wants to get out of the country, she took the opportunity. She hold the promised of the man that he is going to give him a better life. The man helped her family to move to an apartment because they just used to live in small village, the guy bought his mother all the basic appliances, such TV, washing Machine, Fridge, and so on. So she was very please on what the man shown to her family. They got married in the Phils , spent over 50,000 pesos for the wedding and etc. Then she applied for a spouse visa, and finally arrived here. It was a big shock, when she saw where the guy lives, she have to live in the house together with the sick parents of his husband and his 2 grown up children She end up being a caregiver to the oldies. The hubby have 2 children from his previous women which is he didnt tell her, the man drunks every night. She bear all the hardships for few months, then finally she gets the job part time.The hubby lost his job, got fired, so in the end she is the one who works for a living for her hubby , 2 step children and the parents-inlaw. Eventually she get a regular job. The bad side is, the hubby always drain her pocket to buy his beers and cigarettes. On weekends the man has to go to the pub to meet his friends and she believes he is also messing around with cheap bar girls.How sad. She show me her photographs before she left Phls. and obviously she suffered a lot.I asked her , how ols is she? I was shock with her reply, she is just 25 yrs old,but she looks like 40 yrs old. Her hubby obviously didnt look after her.
KeithD
31st October 2007, 10:17
I was shock with her reply, she is just 25 yrs old,but she looks like 40 yrs old. Her hubby obviously didn't look after her.
I'm not aware of any scientific evidence of people aging due to what there hubby gets up to!
ginapeterb
31st October 2007, 10:30
Bluegirl.
Sorry about your friend, but I have to say:
Not all filipinas who married to a foreigner husband are having a better life
This is what happens, when young filipinas accept proposals from a foreigner just so that they can escape their life in the Philippines, your story whilst being sad, is just one example of someone in the world who ended up being stuck in a bummer of a relationship.
Your story is just one example, it is counteracted by many thousands of relationships that are the opposite, on the whole, they come for a better life, or else what is the point of coming ?
Your freind is like so many young Pakistani and Indian girls who get trafficked into arranged marriages, with promises of this and that, and then end up in a 3 bedroom semi in Southall London looking after the mans ageing parents and feeding multiple children whilst spending all day house cleaning.
I am afraid its not unusual, and your freind is one of many who find themselves in that situation, I wonder though, your freind is not married to an ethnic minority person is she, because it sounds like it.. ageing parents in the house, grown up children ?
joebloggs
31st October 2007, 11:56
Get rid of the gate post...........
Problem solved.........
my 10% commission now please, before the bailiffs come around your house...
the gate post is attached to a 6ft brick walll :NoNo:
as for the bailiffs, i phoned the number on the threating letter, and they want me to send proof, eg utility bill. council tax bill to show that i live at the address, well :censored: them, i'm not doing their job for them, surely its up to them to have evidence where this person lives, they can check the phone book, electroial reg, credit agency, who ever, i've lived at the house for 40 years, and that person they are looking for has never lived or been at the house, i'm thinking of writing to them, telling them he has never lived there, but if they want evidence i live there, they can come at any reasonable time and i will show it them, but i'm not sending it to them, they can come and get off their :butthead: and look at it , cheeky little :censored:.
oh and as their customer is a court, they have the power to use a lock smith, even if there is no one in the house and take what they like, i'm sure thats breaking and entering, trespassing.. :cwm23:, looks like i'll be taking someone else to a small claims court :D
bigtombowski
31st October 2007, 20:06
u don't want to get into fights with bailiffs
unless u live in belfast -- this is the one city in UK where bailiffs don't exist ...
lol
this is one area in which the paramiliataries still rule ;)
bahala na
lol
andypaul
31st October 2007, 20:20
u don't want to get into fights with bailiffs
unless u live in belfast -- this is the one city in UK where bailiffs don't exist ...
lol
this is one area in which the paramiliataries still rule ;)
bahala na
lol
I thought the paramiliateries were the balilff/debt collectors over there:omg:
bigtombowski
31st October 2007, 20:25
they are unofficially out ...
but really, the reason why the top men here who draw the dole but have several houses each and BMW's is coz the only business they can do now is "loansharking" lol
but also
it means that any debt i had in england, stays in england :D
eljean
31st October 2007, 21:01
hmmm this is interesting : as far as i know the true courting and marriage custom in the philippines based on what i have learned from school and from the olds pipz as well, that pinays are known to be mahinhin and when it comes to courting guys should do some service for her family and impress the parents like getting water from the wheel, making firewoods,doing all household chores, giving ulam or like fruits any filipino food as offering and when he comes to visit her the parents are also around to listen to both of you lol...so no i love you in the converstion... also you cant get out dating without a chaperon and also the guy should ask the parents first if ever he wants to date their daughter out. speaking of date just a dinner out date or a walk in the park and now when they become officially steady its considered as engagement and theres the parents again decide about it the cost of marriage should be paid by the guy and the parents of the guy as well ask permission in behalf of son to marry their daughter before it only cost 2 cows and 2 pigs for the longest meal for the day its very tradditional and classic this has been very big part of our culture but it seems like it has been totally erased now lol...but anyway i just remember the old ways...and also....i dont think you should have burden all the other expenses which i think it is so absurb but....if you are really that to generous to be like that and spoiled your wife/fiancee/girlfriend shes so lucky to have someone like you then...:D
joebloggs
1st November 2007, 11:53
I thought the paramiliateries were the balilff/debt collectors over there:omg:
:icon_lol:
yes, they provide a protection service.. and to protect you, from those who you give money to, if you don't give them the money :Erm:...
i've got me dog and wife to protect me and the house, and a big sofa to hide behind :xxparty-smiley-004:
i'm just sick of other peoples problems, if they turn up they are gonna get some :cwm23: :furious3: off me, i want to see what evidence this polish guy has ever lived at my address, and if they haven't got any, they better :censored: off.
KeithD
1st November 2007, 13:27
They can only serve the order on the person they are looking for, so just call the police as they will be tresspassing and using agression against an innocent member of the public.
aromulus
1st November 2007, 13:56
Maybe in a previous life your name was
Josephivic Bloggoyewsky????
And supported Liverpool????
joebloggs
1st November 2007, 14:52
Maybe in a previous life your name was
Josephivic Bloggoyewsky????
And supported Liverpool????
ta scouser keith, i knew you would know about that, being from liverpool :D
:omg: could be, infact my parents are not english, thou my moms been here since 1945 !! and still doesn't have a british passport :doh
i got about 10 letters for this polish guy, i put them back in the post box, saying not known at this address, so i got sick of doing this, and open it, by mistake of course :D, and as their customer is a court, it says they can use a locksmith to enter the house even if no one is in, thats got to be breaking and entering, i don't see how they break in, they've got no evidence he's ever lived here.. becuase he hasn't i've lived there for 40yrs, and i'd know :icon_lol:
i'll just wait for them to come around, i'm not posting evidence i live at the house, why should i :icon_lol:.....
KeithD
1st November 2007, 14:58
Just go the CAB
bigtombowski
1st November 2007, 15:46
Maybe in a previous life your name was
Josephivic Bloggoyewsky????
And supported Liverpool????
this is how polish this country has become ... when people see my Marivic's name they instintively say "marra-vitch"!
lol
now that says something!
lol
tom
bigtombowski
1st November 2007, 15:46
Maybe in a previous life your name was
Josephivic Bloggoyewsky????
And supported Liverpool????
oops and i am bigtomBOWSKI! lol
sheesh
ervenescence
1st November 2007, 15:56
Bologneseky and carbonarraskas..:D
bigtombowski
1st November 2007, 15:59
erve is cooking some of that polish food ... she may as well, she's living in an adopted polish country
aromulus
1st November 2007, 16:39
this is how polish this country has become ... when people see my Marivic's name they instintively say "marra-vitch"!
lol
now that says something!
lol
tom
Marivic Bowski........... :NoNo:
That gives the game away.........:D
bigtombowski
1st November 2007, 16:49
that's funny :D
i'm going to work now, be home at 12:30 :D
just in time to give marivic bowski her morning phone call :D
tom
aposhark
14th April 2008, 04:07
.....I do not care even I can not afford to buy expensive signature brands of bags, shoes, clothes and etc what I care most is we always have a great time chatting, playing games online everyday. Guess what, I always beat him in scrabble...:xxgrinning--00xx3:
So Guyz not all filipinas are materialistic, infact we are very easy to please.. You do not need to spend a million to impress us, just treat us fairly and respect us as woman we are happy and we`ll be very proud of you.:)
Hi Bridget, I hope my future wife will think like you. We have spent our limited time in Phils just chatting and getting to know each other. She wouldn't even let me take her to the more costly places to eat, she was so thoughtful like that :)
I have no time for designer labels myself either and think the world has gone mad even contemplating spending ludicrous money on items to make themselves feel good. People have wardrobes full of clothes that they never use, but they are off to the shops to buy more. :doh
Most people I grew up in the UK thought like this, that friendship and good conversation were the most important things, and not to let advertisers brainwash everyone. :Cuckoo::Cuckoo::NoNo::NoNo::yikes:
My GF seemed to appreciate the acts of kindness, affection and warmth more than anything which bode well for the future in my eyes.
scott&ligaya
14th April 2008, 16:58
So far my "investment" has been the most profitable I have ever made, she suggested we buy rice land in Isabella, we are making an excellent profit, she suggested we buy plots in Palawan, we have sold two at over 75% return in two years, plus our house/plot there has also doubled in value in three years. She advised me buy a condo in makati in a pre build purchase, we sold it when the building was complete at 40% profit, she has made me truly happy and just made us a beautiful son, priceless!!!!!!!!, for everything else I have my wise filipina to counsel me. who needs mastercard.
Eljohno
14th April 2008, 17:52
Glad things have worked out so well for you and i am happy you will be a family soon!!
I have never actually heard of anyone making good profit in the Philippines who was a foreigner so well done, you sure got good advice...
scott&ligaya
14th April 2008, 19:46
Yes I am lucky, as I say it is all down to my clever mahal, I am thinking of renting her out as a financial planning consultant at £200 per hour when she arrives here at the weekend!!!
keithAngel
17th April 2008, 13:44
Hi Bridget, I hope my future wife will think like you. We have spent our limited time in Phils just chatting and getting to know each other. She wouldn't even let me take her to the more costly places to eat, she was so thoughtful like that :)
I have no time for designer labels myself either and think the world has gone mad even contemplating spending ludicrous money on items to make themselves feel good. People have wardrobes full of clothes that they never use, but they are off to the shops to buy more. :doh
Most people I grew up in the UK thought like this, that friendship and good conversation were the most important things, and not to let advertisers brainwash everyone. :Cuckoo::Cuckoo::NoNo::NoNo::yikes:
My GF seemed to appreciate the acts of kindness, affection and warmth more than anything which bode well for the future in my eyes.
At last a post that doesn't support consumerism from a man here. I have no intention of going down that road.
I work to live, owe nothing and do not believe Gucci is an antidote to years of poverty
When my Lady says she is not materialistic I believe her.
There is a strong tendency in the west to equate money with safety, how much is enough? our excess is mirrored back in the poverty of others, defending our lifestyle in a finite world means less for others
My idea is to spend half my time in the Phillis, earn less , consume less and share more, that's my idea of quality of life and I don't believe for a Minuit there are no ladies that could not appreciate that.
joebloggs
17th April 2008, 14:11
:xxgrinning--00xx3:
no designer labels either for me, not even the fake ones, and there are many fakes ones in Manc land :D..
if your Lady says she is not materialistic, doesn't mean her family isn't, and i'm sure your lady will do and give all she can to them :cwm24:
i don't think anyone belives me at work, for years i've been telling them, soon, i'll be sat under a palm tree on a beach in Palawan, not a care or a worry in the world :rolleyes:, no £1+ for a litre of petrol, no £110 a month poll tax, no £120 a month gas/electric bill, no congestion charge, no £500 month childcare bill, list goes on a on, just working and living to pay bills :cwm24:, but i'll get out of the rat race, b4 its too late :xxgrinning--00xx3:
aposhark
17th April 2008, 15:13
I cannot tell anyone how to spend their money, they have the freedom to do that in any way they want.
What I do object to (now bearing in mind that my Filipina & I may be over so I could be a bit negative at the moment) is that buying ladies designer labels sends out all the wrong messages. Not to the lady who is receiving the gucci handbag for example, but for the others who see this and the continued distortion of life values that is created and stays in people's minds.
I'll give you an example that horrified me at the time and still rankles.
I was working in Vung Tau, Vietnam back in the early 80's when two American men went off for 2 day's R&R. When they came back I asked them how their break went and I could see from their wide smiles that things had gone very well for them.
I have worked with Americans for the best part of 25 years and have seen their generosity at first hand so many times.
Now this is a family forum so let me just say that they paid so over the odds for services that it wasn't a big surprise that 30 taxis arrived from Ho Chi Minh City in the following week with more services.
How these things change and damage people.
It just makes it so bad for everyone that follows.
So give them a hug and not a gucci, just my twopence worth.
If the next girl I meet wants to go to a designer label store or whinges about wanting this and that, I would ask her to go for a very long walk with me and quietly iron out some things.
I have met so many men married to Filipinas and they are mostly adamant about not "flashing the cash". They all seemed to avoid designer nonsense and valued the companionship more than anything.
flomike
5th July 2008, 00:28
this is a nice post....for sure my husband spend loads as well:NoNo: I asked him once how much he spend etc but he doesn't want to discuss that anymore as it is not important.
I admit I am one of those filipina who get monthly allowance from his husband/fiancee/BF. I met my husband online and we chat for about 8 months before we met personally in the Phils. My husband is not as generous as some people here ( I mean sending money already even you haven't met yet, my husband start sending me money after we got engage and it last for about 5 months) Though, when we're still chatting he said he put £10 on my b-day card that I never recieve at all , he send me some music cd's (rock band that I never heard of:Erm:) small parcel as a Christmas gift and of course a cellphone (surprise surprise) though he didn't buy it, its a company cellphone that they usually recycle so its not posh a one:bigcry:.
We got engaged the first visit and he bought me engagement ring cost him a bit of £. Actually Im morethan happy with £50 coz I am not into jewelries but he said I deserve a special one:cwm12:. When we finalize our wedding day 5 months after we get engaged I make sure that time that he won't spend much money on our wedding as I know he is really short of money already (after the first visit and within 5 months flying again in the Phils and the cost of fiancee visa bec that time I already applied for a fiancee visa as he wants me to go back with him after the wedding). We both agreed of simple civil wedding ( Im glad that my family is not expecting a big wedding ).
I know my husband spend a few thousand pounds in 5 years of marriage. I ask him money a few times for emergency back home, though I pay him. In away Im lucky that I don't have a siblings, aunts/uncle, cousins or nephew or nieces to support though I send them money occassionally. I guess the big expenses we had is my mother's medical expenses and the house we're paying for my family (I had a post about it in Ranting).
I am just thankful that I have my husband he is my LIFE.
You
You give me hope,
The strength, the will to keep on;
No one else can make me feel this way
And only you
Can bring out all the best I can do;
I believe you turn the tide
And make me feel real good inside.
You pushed me up
When I’m about to give up;
You’re on my side when no one seems to listen
And if you go,
You know the tears can’t help but show
You’ll break this heart and tear it apart;
Then suddenly the madness starts
[chorus]
It’s your smile,
Your face, your lips that I miss,
Those sweet little eyes that stare at me
And make me say,
I’m with you through all the way.
’Cause it’s you
Who fills the emptiness in me;
It changes ev’rything, you see,
When I know I’ve got you with me
You pushed me up
When I’m about to give up;
You’re on my side when no one seems to listen
And if you go,
You know the tears can’t help but show
You’ll break this heart and tear it apart;
Then suddenly the madness starts
[repeat chorus 2x]
I always sing this song to my husband:) with my horrible voice:D!!!
I hope some filipinas who just starting a relationship with foreigners don't expect too much on them as they are just ordinary person working so hard to meet ends and enjoy life:) Good Luck.
I never expect anything from my husband, so when I do get something; it always feels like a bonus :xxgrinning--00xx3:
My husband's very lucky really, because I have always worked even when I had the children. I even went back to work my youngest daughter was only 7 weeks old! :omg:
jimeve
5th July 2008, 13:03
Too right, keep them keen, treat them meen, only joking :Erm:
Fitzy
13th July 2008, 14:59
Ok, is my 2nd post, and I wd like to say, that I am glad to be here, and just spent some time reading interesting posts here.
I have known my gf from cebu for almost a year now, and will fly out to meet her for 2 weeks holiday, and we will stay in Bohol.
We have grown very close to one another, and she has never asked my me for money.
Is my decision to send her an allowance each month, for which she is grateful for, and she also has a job there.
In Friendfinder many girls have asked me for money on the onset.
This I found to be very bad, as I like to think of myself other than just a bank. lol
With the immigration thing, I have been there, as am seperated from my peruvian wife, as we discovered that after years of learning each others languages, eng/span span/eng we have so little in common.
What a shame!!:NoNo:
Anyway, I am a fighter, and will not let this put me off, lol
My ex to be has her ILR so we will go our seperate ways.
I must say that i'm a bit nervous to be flying to see her in January, but she is a nice honest girl, and I hope to get it right this time :)
Many thanks for putting up with my thoughts, lol
Philip...
vbkelly
13th July 2008, 15:22
Ok, is my 2nd post, and I wd like to say, that I am glad to be here, and just spent some time reading interesting posts here.
I have known my gf from cebu for almost a year now, and will fly out to meet her for 2 weeks holiday, and we will stay in Bohol.
We have grown very close to one another, and she has never asked my me for money.
Is my decision to send her an allowance each month, for which she is grateful for, and she also has a job there.
In Friendfinder many girls have asked me for money on the onset.
This I found to be very bad, as I like to think of myself other than just a bank. lol
With the immigration thing, I have been there, as am seperated from my peruvian wife, as we discovered that after years of learning each others languages, eng/span span/eng we have so little in common.
What a shame!!:NoNo:
Anyway, I am a fighter, and will not let this put me off, lol
My ex to be has her ILR so we will go our seperate ways.
I must say that i'm a bit nervous to be flying to see her in January, but she is a nice honest girl, and I hope to get it right this time :)
Many thanks for putting up with my thoughts, lol
Philip...
goodluck to you and your gf
Fitzy
13th July 2008, 18:07
Thank you so much my friend. Somehow I think that this will be it:)
Philip....
kimmi
13th July 2008, 18:55
Ok, is my 2nd post, and I wd like to say, that I am glad to be here, and just spent some time reading interesting posts here.
I have known my gf from cebu for almost a year now, and will fly out to meet her for 2 weeks holiday, and we will stay in Bohol.
We have grown very close to one another, and she has never asked my me for money.
Is my decision to send her an allowance each month, for which she is grateful for, and she also has a job there.
In Friendfinder many girls have asked me for money on the onset.
This I found to be very bad, as I like to think of myself other than just a bank. lol
With the immigration thing, I have been there, as am seperated from my peruvian wife, as we discovered that after years of learning each others languages, eng/span span/eng we have so little in common.
What a shame!!:NoNo:
My ex to be has her ILR so we will go our seperate ways.
I must say that i'm a bit nervous to be flying to see her in January, but she is a nice honest girl, and I hope to get it right this time :)
Many thanks for putting up with my thoughts, lol
Philip...
Goodluck Philip,and surely u will enjoy ur stay in BOhol..:):xxgrinning--00xx3:
Anyway, I am a fighter, and will not let this put me off, lol
Fitzy
13th July 2008, 19:43
Goodluck Philip,and surely u will enjoy ur stay in BOhol..:):xxgrinning--00xx3:
Anyway, I am a fighter, and will not let this put me off, lol
Hi Kimmi.
I see u like my sense of humor heheheh
Thanks for the kind words.
I think i am going to like this forum:)
Thank u all.
Philip....
vbkelly
14th July 2008, 09:57
will fly out to meet her for 2 weeks holiday, and we will stay in Bohol. bohol is very nice place hope you enjoy there with your gf,and hopefully you can visit in my place in ANDA nice and lovely beaches in there, which is 1 1/2 hour from tagbilaran city
Sim11UK
14th July 2008, 17:03
will fly out to meet her for 2 weeks holiday, and we will stay in Bohol. bohol is very nice place hope you enjoy there with your gf,and hopefully you can visit in my place in ANDA nice and lovely beaches in there, which is 1 1/2 hour from tagbilaran city
I would like to go to Bohol, on my next trip, hopefully the beginning of october? I'd like to find some nice beaches, so that sounds good.
Back to the thread, this project is expensive, but the end result, will be worth it. :)
Fitzy
15th July 2008, 16:35
Yes it will be my friend.:)
I didn't chat to my gf in messenger from her work since last Thursday, so I phoned here at work(not always a good idea coz her boss doesn't like personal callers) heheh
I missed her so very much, and was worried that something was wrong.
She was so excited to hear from me, as the reason we couldn't chat in messenger earlier was coz their internet provider is changing. We chat almost ever day, lol
She is such a genuine beautiful girl, and can hardly wait for January :)
I miss her so much, and finally think life is about to change for the better, and the expense will be worth it.
Money is only material.
Love is everything:)
Philip..
Sim11UK
15th July 2008, 20:39
Yes it will be my friend.:)
I didn't chat to my gf in messenger from her work since last Thursday, so I phoned here at work(not always a good idea coz her boss doesn't like personal callers) heheh
I missed her so very much, and was worried that something was wrong.
She was so excited to hear from me, as the reason we couldn't chat in messenger earlier was coz their internet provider is changing. We chat almost ever day, lol
She is such a genuine beautiful girl, and can hardly wait for January :)
I miss her so much, and finally think life is about to change for the better, and the expense will be worth it.
Money is only material.
Love is everything:)
Philip..
Good luck! with it :xxgrinning--00xx3: I often wonder, how I'm going to find the money, but so far I've managed it...Somehow you do :)
Fitzy
17th July 2008, 20:02
I think all will be ok, as I have savings, but this house is draining me, lol, what with new windows, and a conservatory being built:)
Am fortunate to have a well paid job, but never complacent about money, as i come from a very humble background.
Am flying from heathrow, terminal 1 with an Airline called Asiana.
Has anybody heard of them? Are they ok?
Ironically, i work in Heathrow as a Radio Engineer, and can maybe tap them for an upgrade, lol.
Will keep you all posted, with regards to Hanzell, and me, and our vacation in the trpical paradise of Bohol:)
Philip..
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