Family values

[stevewool]

You hear about the loving family we support ourselves and muck in together, THE FAMILY VALUES, its called, but does it exist,
Have you got a story that its alive and kicking or a story about its dead and long gone,

[Tawi2]

Different for everyone,some families are fragmented and fractured,some are tight and cohesive,you can choose your friends but not your family :smile:

[marksroomspain]

Lucky myself as well as my lovely lady and our little boy we have my father living with us who turns 80 in 2 weeks and would have it no other way also extremely close to my sister who comes down each morning before work. My brother on the other hand we are worlds apart and don't bother with each other...:smile:

[Tawi2]

Pinoy families are much the same but the politics and dynamics within each group are even more bizarre at times,whatever anyone tells you about pinoy family values I have seen enough families in the PI to realise thats not true for all :icon_lol:

[stevewool]

Pinoy families are much the same but the politics and dynamics within each group are even more bizarre at times,whatever anyone tells you about pinoy family values I have seen enough families in the PI to realise thats not true for all :icon_lol:

indeed

[Terpe]

Pinoy families are much the same but the politics and dynamics within each group are even more bizarre at times,whatever anyone tells you about pinoy family values I have seen enough families in the PI to realise thats not true for all :icon_lol:

Double indeed.

I've come to the conclusion that the Pinoy family values 'glue' is largely myth.

[stevewool]

Most probably it was there a few years back but time moves on and we all want the best for our children so who then comes first the children or your Parents,
If only it could be a case of giving and sharing to both, rather then forgetting and hopefully someone else can sort it out , whats the saying bury your head in sand

[Terpe]

As for me, I've always believed that we owe our children everything, but they owe us nothing.

As a kid I knew we had a large large family and I also knew my mum and dad held reasons not to be close.
I later discovered that they both found it difficult to give in to the constant requests for emergency help. We didn't have much of anything really but it didn't deter the leaches from taking whatever they could get a away with.

[stevewool]

Thats a good word Leaches, I shall have to remember that one rather than the Evil one :biggrin:

[grahamw48]

My own siblings and mum here in UK are pretty close, though all physically living in different towns. Plenty of mutual respect and affection.

[Tawi2]

Double indeed.

I've come to the conclusion that the Pinoy family values 'glue' is largely myth.

It is,I have a book-full of personal experiences and observations to back up the pinoy-families-aint-that-perfect argument :icon_lol:

[stevewool]

It is,I have a book-full of personal experiences and observations to back up the pinoy-families-aint-that-perfect argument :icon_lol:

No family is perfect but its when they think they are, thats when the problems start

[Michael Parnham]

No family is perfect but its when they think they are, thats when the problems start

I can never remember my mother ever saying she loved me or giving me a hug, never knew she was my mother until I was about 9 or 10 years old, but it never bothered me because I never new any different, it bothers me now though! :Erm:

[Arthur Little]

... but it didn't deter the leaches from taking whatever they could get away with.


Thats a good word Leaches, I shall have to remember that one ...

:biggrin: ... leach ... :Erm: ... isn't it 'leech' for the parasite?

:icon_sorry: ... not trying to be pedantic here ... :anerikke: ... it's just I once knew folks called Leach. :biggrin:

Oops, :doh - my mistake - their name was spelt Leitch.

[Arthur Little]

As for me, I've always believed that we owe our children everything, but they owe us nothing.

Yep, :iagree: me 'n' all! :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[Arthur Little]

Family values, IMO, are paramount to a civilised Society.

Now I've no wish to stir up a hornet's nest :nono-1-1: ... but I've said it before - and I'll say it again - I peronally feel standards have dropped since mothers with pre-school-age children started going out to work en masse.

[London_Manila]

You hear about the loving family we support ourselves and muck in together, THE FAMILY VALUES, its called, but does it exist,
Have you got a story that its alive and kicking or a story about its dead and long gone,

Family values in the Philippines seems to center around financial gain :wink:

Allow me to widen the debate further on financial matters in the Philippines
I have yet to meet anybody in the Philippines who has a clue about money or how to spend it
Here in the UK we are brought up to believe that saving some money for emergencies is prudent
That just does not happen in the Phills whatever money they have they will spend and only start to think about money when all their money has run out

Is this just different cultural behaviour or do we put it down to a lack of education on financial matters ?

[Tawi2]

I can never remember my mother ever saying she loved me or giving me a hug, never knew she was my mother until I was about 9 or 10 years old, but it never bothered me because I never new any different, it bothers me now though! :Erm:
Thats something I can empathise with,my mother and father were exactly the same,no display of affection whatsoever,they were both actually quite brutal and nowadays would be prime candidates for a child abuse case :icon_lol:But I always tell my kid I love him,and even though he is taller and bigger physically than me I always hug him,this sometimes embarrasses him and he shrugs me off,but at least he knows I am always there for him :smile:
London_manila your right,most family disputes I have seen in pinas in a number of different families revolve around cash,I know guys who say I want to marry a filipina because they have family values,they really need to know the word should sometimes be spelt VALUEs :icon_lol:

[grahamw48]

Similar experience for me Tawi, and I'm also like you are with your son. I try not to embarrass him too much now he's 21 and a very fit bodybuilder. :icon_lol:

[Ako Si Jamie]

Family values in the Philippines seems to center around financial gain :wink:

Allow me to widen the debate further on financial matters in the Philippines
I have yet to meet anybody in the Philippines who has a clue about money or how to spend it
Here in the UK we are brought up to believe that saving some money for emergencies is prudent
That just does not happen in the Phills whatever money they have they will spend and only start to think about money when all their money has run out

Is this just different cultural behaviour or do we put it down to a lack of education on financial matters ?My friend who has been going to the Philippines for the past thirty years or so says exactly the same. Maybe they don't save their money because they don't want to part with what they saved when a family crisis arises. :Erm:

[Ako Si Jamie]

As for me, I've always believed that we owe our children everything, but they owe us nothing.

Proves what a decent fella you are Peter :xxgrinning--00xx3:. Pity the selfish religious loons I got lumbered with didn't share the same sentiments. They even had the brass neck to admit I was only brought into this world to look after them when they're older. I may well have done if they hadn't put their buddy in the sky before me and my sister leaving us without any emotional support for our entire childhoods :anerikke:.

[London_Manila]

My friend who has been going to the Philippines for the past thirty years or so says exactly the same. Maybe they don't save their money because they don't want to part with what they saved when a family crisis arises. :Erm:

Yes maybe and if other members of their family find out that they have some savings then for sure they would have a great idea on how to spend it.......

I have seen some unbelievable situations over there regarding money.....
The rents due at the end of next week but this person thinks it fine to blow their last 2000 pesos on a night out with friends :Erm:

[Michael Parnham]

Yes maybe and if other members of their family find out that they have some savings then for sure they would have a great idea on how to spend it.......

I have seen some unbelievable situations over there regarding money.....
The rents due at the end of next week but this person thinks it fine to blow their last 2000 pesos on a night out with friends :Erm:

Very common in Philippines! :crazy:

[London_Manila]

Very common in Philippines! :crazy:

There seems no sense at all behind their spending habits and if anything they seem hellbent on making themselves poorer :doh

If you try and point out that their spending habits maybe not such a great idea they just don't get it at all......
The attitude seems to be "oh well tonight i will be happy spending this money and having a great time with my friends and next week i will be depressed about having no money to pay the rent"

[Dedworth]

There seems no sense at all behind their spending habits and if anything they seem hellbent on making themselves poorer :doh

If you try and point out that their spending habits maybe not such a great idea they just don't get it at all......

Driven by mug buying of brands & designer names to keep up with the Jones'es

[Michael Parnham]

Driven by mug buying of brands & designer names to keep up with the Jones'es

A lot of them borrow money to have a Fiesta and it will take three years to pay back with lot's of interest and the following year they borrow again for the annual Fiesta and every year the debt gets bigger and when they die the rest of the family end up paying what's owed and the Fiesta still continues and the bill gets bigger and bigger and so it goes on and on!:Erm:

[stevewool]

The best thing my mum and dad gave me was common sense. It was bread into me, and I still use it and that's what a lot of people in this world are missing

[Ako Si Jamie]

A lot of them borrow money to have a Fiesta and it will take three years to pay back with lot's of interest and the following year they borrow again for the annual Fiesta and every year the debt gets bigger Mirrors the ones over here who get too far into debt over Christmas.

[grahamw48]

They certainly seem happier and more sociable than most of the miserable buggers in this rich country.:Erm:

[Ako Si Jamie]

They certainly seem happier and more sociable than most of the miserable buggers in this rich country.:Erm:That's true! :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[Ako Si Jamie]

The best thing my mum and dad gave me was common sense. It was bread into me, and I still use it and that's what a lot of people in this world are missing

That's the yeast they could do! :wink:

[London_Manila]

The best thing my mum and dad gave me was common sense. It was bread into me, and I still use it and that's what a lot of people in this world are missing

From what i have seen in the UK is = you are either good with money or not

Maybe it is taught in childhood but you cant change someone who is unwise on their spending habits and is normally broke....

[London_Manila]

They certainly seem happier and more sociable than most of the miserable buggers in this rich country.:Erm:

Us miserable buggers are too busy counting our money to be worried about happiness :wink:

[London_Manila]

Driven by mug buying of brands & designer names to keep up with the Jones'es

Yes it has to be LEE jeans from a huge expensive mall at 1800 pesos instead of a perfectly decent pair of jeans off a market stall at 300 pesos.................

[London_Manila]

A lot of them borrow money to have a Fiesta and it will take three years to pay back with lot's of interest and the following year they borrow again for the annual Fiesta and every year the debt gets bigger and when they die the rest of the family end up paying what's owed and the Fiesta still continues and the bill gets bigger and bigger and so it goes on and on!:Erm:

Money lending in the Philippines is a dangerous profession with so many of them ending up being shot

[Arthur Little]

Yes it has to be LEE jeans from a huge expensive mall at 1800 pesos instead of a perfectly decent pair of jeans off a market stall at 300 pesos.................

Do you get such a thing as a "decent" pair of jeans? (by decent, I mean dressy) :olddude: ... to me, MOST denim jeans look more suited to navvying!

:peepwall:

[Arthur Little]

Do you get such a thing as a "decent" pair of jeans? (by decent, I mean dressy) :olddude: ... to me, MOST denim jeans look more suited to navvying!

:peepwall:

Okay ... :yeahthat:'s the modern style ... :anerikke: ... but surely for casual wear, a nice pair of well-cut slacks is much smarter. :wink:

[Michael Parnham]

Do you get such a thing as a "decent" pair of jeans? (by decent, I mean dressy) :olddude: ... to me, MOST denim jeans look more suited to navvying!

:peepwall:

'7allmankind' are the best jeans, you'll find them in House of Fraser around £300 per pair (quality):xxgrinning--00xx3:

[grahamw48]

If I stop wearing jeans I'll finally have become my dad. :yikes:

They are practical, above all. :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[Dedworth]

If I stop wearing jeans I'll finally have become my dad. :yikes:

They are practical, above all. :xxgrinning--00xx3:

These are top spec & good vfm for us Kuripots - Asda "Save Money Live More" ! ......£6 a pair :biggrin:

http://direct.asda.com/george/mens/mens-jeans/straight-cut-dark-wash-jeans/G004650389,default,pd.html&cmpid=ppc-_-ad-pla-_-ggle-pla-_-Men-_-GEM294296&cm_mmc=ad-ppc-_-ggle-pla-_-Men-_-GEM294296&istCompanyId=2698bd23-149e-43d1-940b-8cc94f7ea571&istItemId=wqawqmrir&istBid=tztx

[grahamw48]

Look good...as long as the seams don't wind around the legs and the backside is on straight. :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[grahamw48]

My cheapest pair I have to wear with a long coat, as the crutch hangs about 6" too low. :icon_lol:

[Trefor]

My cheapest pair I have to wear with a long coat, as the crutch hangs about 6" too low. :icon_lol:

I think low 'crutch' is the fashion Graham :action-smiley-081:

[raynaputi]

Yes it has to be LEE jeans from a huge expensive mall at 1800 pesos instead of a perfectly decent pair of jeans off a market stall at 300 pesos.................

Well mind you, I have Lee, Wrangler and Jag jeans which up to now still look new after more than 5 years (brought them all when I got here 3 years ago). Keith only has Wrangler and Levi's jeans because it last for a very long time. The old ones he gave to my brothers last time we went back home (the colour of the jeans were fading already and he doesn't like faded jeans) were already a few years old and now my brothers are using them! I don't really like buying cheap jeans because it usually end up in the bin after a year or even less. :thumbsdown:

What I would never buy are branded bags like LV, Channel, Coach, etc. It really cost too much and I'd rather have new clothes and shoes instead of a bag like that. I've brought all my bags from Manila but never used them. I have only been using just my small shoulder bag that I have since I was probably 13 yrs. old. It was a Liz Claiborne cross body purse given to me by my godmother from the US as a gift. Haha. :biggrin:

[grahamw48]

I hate to mention AGAIN the time I modelled jeans for the Lee Wrangler company. :biggrin:

[London_Manila]

Do you get such a thing as a "decent" pair of jeans? (by decent, I mean dressy) :olddude: ... to me, MOST denim jeans look more suited to navvying!

:peepwall:

The jeans that are all the rage in Makati at the moment are jeans which looks like someone has taken a razor blade to them = many cuts across the legs from top to bottom :biggrin:

[London_Manila]

Okay ... :yeahthat:'s the modern style ... :anerikke: ... but surely for casual wear, a nice pair of well-cut slacks is much smarter. :wink:

I find Chinos with the elasticated waistband from M and S are much more comfortable on a long haul flight when compared to jeans :smile:

[London_Manila]

Well mind you, I have Lee, Wrangler and Jag jeans which up to now still look new after more than 5 years (brought them all when I got here 3 years ago). Keith only has Wrangler and Levi's jeans because it last for a very long time. The old ones he gave to my brothers last time we went back home (the colour of the jeans were fading already and he doesn't like faded jeans) were already a few years old and now my brothers are using them! I don't really like buying cheap jeans because it usually end up in the bin after a year or even less. :thumbsdown:

What I would never buy are branded bags like LV, Channel, Coach, etc. It really cost too much and I'd rather have new clothes and shoes instead of a bag like that. I've brought all my bags from Manila but never used them. I have only been using just my small shoulder bag that I have since I was probably 13 yrs. old. It was a Liz Claiborne cross body purse given to me by my godmother from the US as a gift. Haha. :biggrin:

I used to try and stay trendy by only buying Levi 501 jeans :doh
The last pair of jeans i purchased were from M and S basic cheapo jeans at £15 a pair and to be honest they are as good as the 501's and even a better fit.......
Jeans are jeans and the only difference is some small label on the back that some people crave
I doubt very much if the the latest Versace t shirt's at £500 each are any better than a £5 effort at the local market

[Michael Parnham]

Okay ... :yeahthat:'s the modern style ... :anerikke: ... but surely for casual wear, a nice pair of well-cut slacks is much smarter. :wink:

Wow Arthur, never heard the word Slacks used since the 40's & 50's very common term in those days! :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[grahamw48]

I find Chinos with the elasticated waistband from M and S are much more comfortable on a long haul flight when compared to jeans :smile:

I do the same. :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[Tawi2]

I only ever wear Hugo Boss jeans because the denim is quality I prefer combats or chinos for everyday comfort,I bought a pair of timberlands the other week,not the originals I normally wear but the new design,my kid said its what middle-aged men would wear :Erm: Iam finally resigned to the fact middle-age is here :smile:
Common sense regarding pinoy spending habits really isn't that common,its true about the fiesta millionaires who borrow to celebrate a single day and spend a year paying it off :NoNo: My mates mother in law vanished for several days as she was en-route to the hospital to pay the money my mate had given her for delivery and after care fees for her newborn grandchild,she never made it to the hospital,she returned home several days later having lost the money at mah-jong,thats more like the "Family-values" I have heard and encountered lots of in over 20 years kicking about in the PI,if money is the root of all evil here its the root of all family jealousy and problems there.

[Terpe]

I don't ever remember my mum or dad wearing jeans. Yet these days a pair of jeans is probably the most popular items of clothing in fashion history.

With such a huge diversity of materials, colours, fits, detailing and washes etc they're almost an extension of our personality.

Finding the perfect pair of jeans is just like trying to find the perfect partner and it's the quality and diversity of small details that makes the difference between worthy and unworthy.

[Arthur Little]

Wow Arthur, never heard the word Slacks used since the 40's & 50's very common term in those days! :xxgrinning--00xx3:

:smile: Ah ... you're right, Michael ... it's a term you seldom hear nowadays. :cwm25: ... guess when I was typing that post, it must've just been the first word that came into my head - "slack" as opposed to tight - most jeans tending to be the latter. :wink:

[stevewool]

I look for the price, its whats inside the clothes that counts :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[Michael Parnham]

:smile: Ah ... you're right, Michael ... it's a term you seldom hear nowadays. :cwm25: ... guess when I was typing that post, it must've just been the first word that came into my head - "slack" as opposed to tight - most jeans tending to be the latter. :wink:

If you cast your mind back Arthur, it was camel coloured slacks that were most popular! :xxgrinning--00xx3:

[Arthur Little]

If you cast your mind back Arthur, it was camel coloured slacks that were most popular! :xxgrinning--00xx3:

Yes ... they were ... you're right again ... camel shade - but [literally] so slack, the "hump" was scarcely discernible. :icon_lol: