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beth18
20th December 2007, 14:58
Hi all,

My stay here in UK will be over soon, tomorrow we will be going to York to spend Christmas with my bf's family and on Boxing day I will be heading to Heathrow Airport.

I say that my stay here was a bitter-sweet experience, in so many ways, but at the end of the day its always the lessons that we learned that matters. Am I coming back? I don't know, We Filipinas has a lot to sacrifice on coming here, in my case, I have to leave a daughter behind who is in her 12ish, where I think it is the age of children that parents have to be with them. Second, I found a nice school here in Central London where I can take a Diploma course, but then again I have to do the whole process again, and I know exactly how it feels and the worry of not being granted, because I've been through with it before when I applied for my visit visa, specially now that there are new rules/laws that are about to be implemented.

Many of you might think, "Why not a fiancee visa or getting married?"

"I don't know...."

He had been to the Philippines nth times and I stayed here devotedly for six months, but he has no plans of getting settled permanently, any comment from the English Gentlemen?

And I know that this is the only way so I can be with my daughter, but on the other side I don't like to drag him of something that he is not ready. So I am thinking of just getting on with my life alone when I go back to the Phil.

I have made friends with Chris and Eula in this site I want to thank them and the administrators, I will continue sharing when I get home, for now I want to ask Eula about working in Dubai cos she worked in that country before. Hope to hear from Eula.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to every one.

Beth

Brenda
20th December 2007, 15:25
Hi all,

My stay here in UK will be over soon, tomorrow we will be going to York to spend Christmas with my bf's family and on Boxing day I will be heading to Heathrow Airport.I say that my stay here was a bitter-sweet experience, in so many ways, but at the end of the day its always the lessons that we learned that matters. Beth

Hi Beth,
Your short story above reminds me of my first departure in Heathrow. It is a mixture of sadness and happiness. Sad to leave him temporarily and happy to see again my family back home. It was after Christmas when I first left Heathrow and I was confused if I will be coming back again to that place, but after 3 months we apply for another visa. He admitted that his house become home for the first time and he said he wants me to be his partner for a lifetime. I told him, that he might just missing all the things I do for him when I was with him, such as cooking, cleaning, ironing,gardening and etc... and he said " yes I miss my housekeeper... and my hotwater bottle."

About what you`ve said,
" He had been to the Philippines nth times and I stayed here devotedly for six months, but he has no plans of getting settled permanently"

That was really sad, that after all you devoted your half year with him away from your daughter, he seems no plans for your future together permanently. I think I agree with your decision of going back to work abroad again for you and your child. If he loves you and realised you mean so much to him he will chase you and will propose a marriage to you. Who knows, you will be surprised oneday.
Well I hope you have a Merry Christmas and goodluck to you and to your daughter.
Cheers!

andypaul
20th December 2007, 20:38
So he wants the cherry but doesn't want to eat the cake?

Wise words from Brenda.

whatever happens I wish you and your Daughter well.

KeithD
20th December 2007, 21:02
Plenty of English guys would jump on you given the chance.......:Erm: .......maybe I should rephrase that!! :D

He's already shown he has no long term interest, go home, look after your kid, and hang around here.....we may find a good looking stalker for you :xxgrinning--00xx3:

Lucky you anyway...getting out of here before the weather gets really bad :rolleyes:

markp
21st December 2007, 09:44
Hi Beth

I know what it's like saying goodbye at Heathrow airport to my fiancée Brenda just after Christmas on two occasions now, and it's got to be one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.

On the first occasion it was New Year's Eve when she departed. I left Heathrow airport in a state almost of shock. I didn't want to spend New Year's Eve alone, and although I knew there was a firework display in the centre of London, I couldn't face going there alone either. I therefore went to my parent's house and only returned home briefly the following day to collect my uniform for a St. John Ambulance duty I was attending.

I remember walking into the house, and then the bedroom. There were reminders of her presence everywhere. It felt almost as if I'd suffered a bereavement, and it took me weeks to fully adjust again.

On the second occasion I was more prepared for how I would feel. That was until I opened my underwear and socks drawer. She had written little notes and tucked them in every pair of socks, and every pair of underpants.
It just brought home to me how much I missed her being with me.

Now Brenda has finally got her fiancée visa and I'm busily planning my trip to the Philippines to accompany her back in January.

Surely your boyfriend is going to feel something like I did when Brenda first departed. Hopefully it will awaken in him similar emotions to those I felt.

As I said in the closing paragraph of my supporting letter to the British Embassy. I've had to say goodbye to Brenda on eight occasions now in Hong Kong, Manila, and London, and I don't want to have to go through that again.

Good luck and I hope things turn out right for you

Pepe n Pilar
21st December 2007, 15:44
Hi Beth18,
So sorry to hear about that. Sometimes there are things that we expect to happen but doesn't and some things happen which we don't expect at all. You have spent 6 months with your bf and he has been here for nth time? and he is not yet decided to settle down with you, well then, you are the only person that can answer to that. I've been on a visit visa last year and didn't know what will happen next. I was thinking if something happen that we won't decide to further the relationship then so be it but, so blessed and fortunate i may say, that everything went well. When i left Heathrow airport last Feb. i saw him teary eyed when i bid goodbye and i cried when i was in the plane. We both felt that we are meant for each other.
If you decide to work abroad then i wish you the best of luck. You have your daughter that loves you dearly. Don't think that you have failed, just put it as an experience. As the saying goes experience is the best teacher. MOve on, who knows someday soon you will meet the man of your dreams. I hope and pray as you go through life you will meet a man that will bring out the best in you.:)
Good luck!

eula mackay
21st December 2007, 20:06
hi beth. i dont know what to say but im impressed you are being very realistic and honest to yourself.

good luck. we wish you well!

id love to be in touch so soon as i could send you a pm i will!

take care and have a happy christmas!