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tootsierolls
24th March 2008, 17:19
Newbie here. Hello to all pinay here.


Anyway, I want your opinion/advice regarding this matter. Everyone's welcome (specially those in their 50's).

My husband is 50 and I am 35. He had a daughter on previous married and she is 23 years old now. Our main discussion now is having a child of our own. He is very open that he doesn't want one anymore (from the very start of our relationship and now we're married). His two reasons are: his 50 now and for financial reason ( raising a child now is very expensive and he's more focus on enjoying our life together and travelling every now and then ). And we don't have a good pay job and we don't have savings either. But, we're happily married despite of this short comings.

On my part, I want to have a child but at the same time I have to consider his part as well.

Sorry for the long story for a newbie. Thanks for listening. Good day

kimmi
24th March 2008, 19:04
hi tootsierolls,

firstly, welcome to the forum I am also a filipina like u and living here now in Scotland with my hubby but not yet 50yrs old..about ur querry I gues ur hubby is right for not having a child at the moment, as what he said for financial reason..Life here in the UK is really expensive unless uve got a job and some savings u will be ok..

But if u really wanted to have a child of ur own, for me, I guess it would be better that u and ur hubby find a job now and try to save so when the time comes that u have ur child u can give him/her all the best..

Goodluck..:)

andypaul
24th March 2008, 22:40
Hi im not A pinay or 50 so im a bit rubbish to comment on this subject
but just like to say Welcome to the Site.

love8888
25th March 2008, 10:27
Hello and welcome to the forum. I am not yet 50 as well.
I know and understand that your hubby has a quite sensible idea of not having a child of your own as it’s too expensive raising a child here and his got one already. I am agree with that and you consider his reason but my point view is does he consider your feelings as well of not having a child of your own since his daughter from previous married is now a lady. Soon this lady will have built her own life as well. At the end of the day she will not be able to look after you when you get old (hope not) but it’s common here in the UK to dump their parents in a home care even it’s their own children, unlike if we have our own child there is a mother and child relationship at least and has a filipino values.

The reason of why we get married is to raise a family right, for me a couple without children can’t call as a family. A woman will not be completely woman if she not becomes a mother not unless if she’s capable to have a child e.g. incompetent. The reason why we work hard and invest is for our future and if we haven’t got any child to whom we gonna left all this things.Having children is always a blessing if God’s will for you to have a child then go for it will find a solution in anyways that’s for sure.