annulment problem

[jonnijon]

All seemed to be going smoothly,my girlfriend filed annulment, went to see the psychiatrist and had the test.Her Ex did not attend the psychiatrist as I would not pay him a large amount of money,he has since received a copy of my girlfriends statement and is now again demanding money for not contesting the annulment.
I have told her to go and see her lawyer at once and tell him what has happened.So just wondering if you guys have any ideas.Thanks in advance:doh

[keithAngel]

All seemed to be going smoothly,my girlfriend filed annulment, went to see the psychiatrist and had the test.Her Ex did not attend the psychiatrist as I would not pay him a large amount of money,he has since received a copy of my girlfriends statement and is now again demanding money for not contesting the annulment.
I have told her to go and see her lawyer at once and tell him what has happened.So just wondering if you guys have any ideas.Thanks in advance:doh

As one who is also on this route sounds like you will have to make some tough decisions my lady is talking about 50000 for the annulment I have said fine she can pay it and I will offer her ex the same for not contesting but payable after the annulment

I also meant it and can play poker with the best of them its your hand and call

[KeithD]

I was going to say somwthing similar to what Keith is doing. Tell him he has it the wrong way, requesting gets nothing, however, going through with it will result in a 'Thank you payment'.

[jonnijon]

Hi Keith,dont know how far down the road you are with annulment but 50000 seems very cheap to me,I think you might find some hidden cost there.Thanks for your idea I had not thought of that,I went into panic mode without thinking lol lol.

[jonnijon]

Thanks Boss Its a nerve wrenching time at the moment.

[keithAngel]

Hi Keith,dont know how far down the road you are with annulment but 50000 seems very cheap to me,I think you might find some hidden cost there.Thanks for your idea I had not thought of that,I went into panic mode without thinking lol lol.

My girlfriend told me the price and since she earns ok money especially with me in the frame to pick up this and that and since I'm in no hurry its her issue not mine with her ex I'm just giving a non negotiable sweetener when and if its completed

One thing for sure I paid attention here on this great forum :icon_lol:and am not becoming anyones pawn

[Cheryl Tyndall]

the defendant do not need to attend any court hearings or any meetings regarding annulment, if he does not want to. As long as all the summons are being sent to his present address. The annulment proceeding will continue. Don't give him money.

[keithAngel]

the defendant do not need to attend any court hearings or any meetings regarding annulment, if he does not want to. As long as all the summons are being sent to his present address. The annulment proceeding will continue. Don't give him money.

The issue was about him "not" contesting was how I understand it

[jonnijon]

Our lawyer said today if he contest we lose our money and the case(all our little brown envelopes :doh

[ginapeterb]

John I have answered your private message, but to expand this matter further, the main problem with the constitution of the Philippines and the Philippine Family code as directed by Congress is that one or more of the parties to a marriage must be a stark raving certified lunatic for the anulment to have any chance of being granted by the superior court.

Unlike in the United Kingdom, and other western democracies where marriage can be dissolved by the consent of parties without interference from the state, and subject to such matters as unreasonable behaviour, adultery, dessertion and or physical violence, dissolving marriages in the Philippines is not quite as straight forward.

The Philippine family code views the institution of marriage as the corner stone of its domestic social policy, i.e. if the marriage breaks down, so does the family and then society fragments in itself, on that basis the state seeks to make it a social construct that marriage is a pre-requisite for a harmonious welfare state, and in the Philippines, there is some evidence for the positive in this regard, i.e. families working together to help each other, children growing up and caring for the parents in later years.

Therefore the relationship between church and state is ever more evident in the Philippines with the catholic church maintaining its grip on state policy with regard to the family, as far as they are concerned, once a marriage takes place, it cannot be dissolved by a divorce procedure since in its mind there are no grounds for dissolving it, not even adultery.

Hence the anulment process, which has always been at the heart of catholicism, i.e. the marriage was not valid at the point of ceremony, the state seeks to find out, if one or more of the parties was in fact crazy at the time they committed to the marriage and if you read the family code, you will see the basic requirements for an anulment petition.

If at the time the marriage was solemnized, one or more of the parties meet certain criteria, i.e. Physchological incapacity to carry out the duties and responsibilities within a marriage and that this can be medically proven, then there is a good chance that a judge can determine that at that time, neither party or one of the parties were unfit to undertake the solemnization of a marriage.

In that event the parties become legally annulled, and at some stage maybe then free to re marry, but lets face it, the whole process is an absolute joke in this day and age, and only the rich it appears seem to be able to get this done with the minimum of inconvenience.

In the above case, once a foreigner is involved, the aggrieved party normally ends up having to pay out more and more money to get the anulment through the court system, however, everytime the liberal lawyers of Manila such as Katrina Legarda and her barkada try to put through an amendment through congress, to allow women the option of divorcing their Filipino husbands, the motion is defeated and the catholic bishops tell them they will burn in hell.

Until someone has the political courage to do what we did in 1533 and denounce the authority of the church of Rome, and make it state law that it may not interfre in a secular society such as Turkey has done, then the Philippines will continue down the path of church interference in social matters.

In this regard, the Philippines cannot be deemed a fully working democracy as a republic of laws, since its laws in the matter of divorce, the family are steeped in Catholic dogma, let us hope one day someone has the courage to stand and make the required changes to allow those who are trapped in loveless relationships who have simply not chosen well or made a mistake to move on with the happiness they deserve.

[jonnijon]

Thanks very much Pete,im not beaten yet,just hope we can do a deal that he will honour.