serious question...

[andypaul]

theres a thin line between helping and making them rely on us for their needs. helping is just giving when they really really need it, supporting is kinda like a monthly thing. you must also understand that its not a matter of wanting money, they really NEED it, life in the PI can be hard for our folks. what i am saying is helping our parents is ok but not the extended family, filipinas will always help the parents, thats just the way we are. but we should also realize when to stop, we filipinas married to brits should not put our family here in a position where we don't have money for our own needs.

I was agreeing but adding that hand outs for those who could and should work is unfair on them and your actually disadvantaging them. As what happens if god forbid you cant support them any more?

Any family member in real need of assitance and parents/grandparents in their later years in either phill or the Uk i think most brit/phill people would want to help and support in helping them as they helped you.

Many brits have also to support elderly family in the Uk which should also be taken in to account. Many were banking on their houses bank rolling their extra care which looks very unlikely in the near future.

[maria_and_matt]

I was agreeing but adding that hand outs for those who could and should work is unfair on them and your actually disadvantaging them. As what happens if god forbid you cant support them any more?

Any family member in real need of assitance and parents/grandparents in their later years in either phill or the Uk i think most brit/phill people would want to help and support in helping them as they helped you.

Many brits have also to support elderly family in the Uk which should also be taken in to account. Many were banking on their houses bank rolling their extra care which looks very unlikely in the near future.

i really think that the problem is our relatives back home, once we get here or anywhere abroad they tend to be wanting more.

and to answer your question, if we can no longer afford to help it has to stop. and they just have to live life like they use to, they have managed before i am certain they will also mnage without help from us. since i stopped sending money to my mother they seem to be doing ok, i felt actually exploited by her, demanding money and more money, so i decided to just stop helping, and to be honest i feel relieved, now my son gets everything he wants and my husband has more money in his pocket

[Ann07]

hi mrs daddy how r u na?
just read ur post now been busy preparing for my baby's christening

u have ur life now, its ok to help but u have to consider and prioritize ur family now. sometimes we just have to make tough decisions and sacrifices that will benefits all. Be happy always

[cheesewiz]

I know how it feels being the eldest among 5 siblings. After I finish my schooling I really need to find a job right away bec I can feel the pressure already that its pay back time (though I feel really disappointed and my parents when I did not pass my nursing board exam) but thank goodness I managed to get a private carer job in a rich family in Phils so even I am there I gave 70% of my wages to my parents so basically nothing much left on my money.

When I get a job offer here in UK my parents is very happy and my entire family bec everyone will benefited on the fortune I am going to earn here what I said before that I am sending my family £300/month for 2 years but since I am beginning to feel the pressure on the mortgage I am paying in Phils as well I decided to cut half of the amount I am sending recently (which they're not very happy about it) but I have to do it bec I feel that my other siblings are beginning to become a parasite. For sure when I go home again next year I am billy no mate

[lizaphil]

same as my family,
they think we easy to got a money peaking in the trees,my hubby he dont want me to help my family,but he cant stop me because i have my own work
im making money im not asking him,so its better if you got your own work
and you can do spend what ever you want

[Mrs Daddy]

hi mrs daddy how r u na?
just read ur post now been busy preparing for my baby's christening

u have ur life now, its ok to help but u have to consider and prioritize ur family now. sometimes we just have to make tough decisions and sacrifices that will benefits all. Be happy always

Hi ann am doing fine thank youthanks for dropping by by the waygoodluck for your cute little angels christining

[Ann07]

Thanks for that mrsdaddy

Ur a good girl such a sacrifice u made for them.