Try to get out more! Teach her how to use public transport so that she is free to get out on her own when she wants to. Go for a walk or a drive. Find the nearest filipino shop and hang around for a while.
Hanging around at home in a strange country bringing up a child can be like a prison sentence.
Wow, Ashby is a bit off the beaten track, there is a good community in Coventry which have regular get togethers, not sure about Leiceter or Nottingham and there is a big gang here in Birmingham. Sorry I cannot help more. if you want to pop down to Birmingham one weekend just let me know in advance and we will meet up and let the wives natter
Scott
I hope things get better for you and your family
Live your life for a reason and don't worry be happy
if you don't know where you are going then any road will do!!
Thanks Guys.
We are based in Croydon.
What course did you enroll in.
Can't have a dog as we live in a flat above a pub, cant; ahve a cat as i hate them
Deck
Buy a snake....if she gets bored of it she can cook itOriginally Posted by deckard97f
Can't have a dog as we live in a flat above a pub, cant; ahve a cat as i hate them
Deck
Keith - Administrator
I have enrolled myself on an english course so that it will keep me occupy by winter comes as its depresses meThanks Guys.
We are based in Croydon.
What course did you enroll in.
Can't have a dog as we live in a flat above a pub, cant; ahve a cat as i hate them
Deck
to loved and beloved is the greatest joy on earth...
Scott
THanks for the offer. It has been a bit of a pain regarding where we live but I have an a aversion to city living - I is a country boy, likes my fields and trees. Still you pays your money and takes your chance.
Thanks guys for all your suggestions.
Unfortunately angry wife has got worse.
Her period is now over a week late
Last night while playing with my daughter, she fell and banged her head, she was ok but my wife came in and blasted me threw her wedding ring at me and has not spoken to me since.
Apart from telling me that she will be leaving.
I had asked her to join the forum but she is not interested.
On and on we go.................i'm not gonna give up on her........i love her too much for that.
TBC
Deck
Ok.
Two can play that game....
Just mention that You are sick and tired of the attitude, remind her of the wedding wows and if she suffers from selective memory you can call her bluff, tell her that, although you love her and will miss her terribly, you don't mind for her to go back to the Philippines, where she will feel happier, but your daughter stays with you in the UK.
I think I might have made some enemies with this post....
I have just sent something like that to her via text.
Lets wait for the fireworks
Deck
NO,you are fine Mod,We call it reverse psychologyOk.
Two can play that game....
Just mention that You are sick and tired of the attitude, remind her of the wedding wows and if she suffers from selective memory you can call her bluff, tell her that, although you love her and will miss her terribly, you don't mind for her to go back to the Philippines, where she will feel happier, but your daughter stays with you in the UK.
I think I might have made some enemies with this post....
but if shes too mad enough,she will bite itand she will say "OK i will go back to PI",hope it wont happen
This situation is far becoming worse than is necessary !
It seems to me, that your situation at home with your newly arrived wife is getting worse by the day, if we are to believe that she threw the wedding ring at you, this seems to have a cause and effect scenario, are you having rows with her verbally, if so, don't !
Most Filipina's in my experience do not like to be confrontational, so avoid that if you can, your the man, take the lead, be supportive, it could be that sadly your choice of wife may be one of the very few I would say around 2-3 per cent of those who come to UK, who have extreme difficulties in settling in this country, although in time it will pass.
The Problem for you at present is that your wife appears to have a huge resentment for the situation she finds herself in.
I think her expectations of life in the UK have been greatly dashed by her immediate surroundings, I alluded to this in a previous post, sometimes we forget just how different it really is for the newly arrived ones.
That is not to say that some Filipina's who come to the UK, seem to settle in within days like a duck takes to a lake, but others I have previously talked about before, hate everything they see, and everything they find, and that includes unfortunately you the husband, the cause of their predicament.
Her shouting and current attitudes towards you, are a defense mechanism for an outlet that needs to find a blame for her situation.
By blaming you, and directing her anger towards you, she needs an outlet to vent her frustrations at where she finds herself.
I can appreciate some advice given here at this forum, such as encouraging her to go to Filipino food shops, using public transport, and by the way, Croydon has a better public transport system than some rural area's especially your great tram system.
She can be encouraged to do a variety of things, to relieve her stress and frustrations, but I am get the feeling that this is a case of extreme home sickness, which will not be cured easily, again, if she is to make a success of her life here, time is the only healer, and no amount of cajoling and encouragement is going to solve that one instantly.
Instantaneous solutions are not going to work, forgive me for saying this, but you might also have to face up to the fact that she may never be happy in this country, I have met guys on route back from Philippines who have given in to letting their wife go back to live, even after 9 months to a year, because they simply will not settle.
But I am hoping for your sake that it won't come to that, again, advice given so far is constructive on the forum, in time your wife may face up to the job she has, which is what she wanted when she signed up for it, again, threats such as, I will drive you to the airport and go home if you don't like it, won't be the answer.
I wish you well with this, it might go on for a while longer yet, maybe even getting worse, before it might get better, the quicker you find your wife a barkada of Filipina female friends to see her, and perhaps have coffee with and go out together, the quicker some of this may subside, my advice then is to encourage her to find other Filipina's to have social time with asap.
That just may start to let her current attitudes subside !
Pete_Forum Moderator
Philippines marriage, Courtships, UK Entry Clearance
been reading this thread and wondering how things are after the text
God grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change, the courage to change the things i can and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people i had to kill because they pissed me off.
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