My wife sent off her British Citizenship Application 2 weeks ago, and it has just bee returned.

WHY? Because on the 28th July without telling anyone they changed the law so that you now need a ESOL Entry 3 in English language to apply, otherwise forget it.

No speaka da English, no entry.

My wife speaks better English than me, but we now have to find an ESOL teacher who can issue the certificate. The problem is, the ESOL is so new, not many teachers are qualified to give it!!

Head - Wall - Banging spring to mind in a sentence.

Why don't they just say foreigners GO HOME?

On top of that once you are a citizen, you have to then attend a town hall meeting for a ceremony to 'welcome' you to Britain. More like make you feel like a git!!