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  1. #1
    Member half.k's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by aposhark View Post
    Hi half.k

    I think he wants you to be like his Mum - a traditional stay-at-home woman.
    (I worked in Singapore and had a Singaporean Chinese girlfriend many years ago). I saw this in some men there, but the old days have gone and Singaporean women like yourself are very modern and ambitious too.
    You sound very mature and ambitious for your age.
    Maybe sometimes he finds your intelligence threatening and not a turn-on for him.
    I think if communication is as prized in your relationship as you say, it would be a good idea to air your views.
    Don't change yourself or your spirit for anyone
    (Good Morning...!)

    You are so right about the mum part! i noticed that over the months hes said things like "japanese women are so perfect, they dont care about work or study, just stay home and dedicate 100% to home" and "if u want to go to uni its ok, if it makes you happy it makes me happy, but i rather you stayed at home and i would take care of you...", he's been integrating these phrases more often now, normally using opportunities like movies when the suitable occasion comes up (eg we are watching the last samurai and he comments profoundly on japanese women as wives).

    In the beginning of our relationship i thought of it as unbearable... but as time goes by, his persuasive psychology has worked so well on me, that Im seriously worried i will soon be his stereotype and not myself anymore.

    thanks for the replies everyone!!

    Tata

    A xxx


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    Quote Originally Posted by half.k View Post
    In the beginning of our relationship i thought of it as unbearable... but as time goes by, his persuasive psychology has worked so well on me, that Im seriously worried i will soon be his stereotype and not myself anymore.
    I think he needs a little "heads up" as to your intelligence and independence.
    A strong woman can always juggle careers and family. Millions do every day.
    Anyway, he should, IMO, be empowering you and looking forward to a life with a great woman, not thinking of chaining you to the kitchen sink
    Besides, he will need your financial support. He seems a little too idealogical.


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