The Filipina "Maid mentality?"

[nigel]

Hi everyone!

I just want to raise a discussion that we might all find interesting, when I first talked to my Vimvie about the kind of career she would like to have in Britiain, she would say things like "I could be a waitress!" or "I could be maid!"

I found this a bit saddening 'cause I feel my Vimvie is intelligent, (certainly more intelligent than I am!) She is good with computers and good with guitar. When I said "You could be a musician!" or "You could work in IT!" she seems to get shy and maybe she thought I'm being too optimistic?

The thing is, if you are a filipina married to a British guy, living in Britain, you can take up any proffession you want! You could do absolutely any career you wish! But it seems that filipina's lack a bit of confidence in themselves maybe?

It seems that filipina's have had the role of a "caregiver/nurse/maid" for so long they find it hard to picture themselves doing something else!? I don't mean this as an insult but I call it a "maid mentality" filipina's are caring and considerate partners, this is very attractive of course, but I encourage my Vimvie to be more confident about herself, she is not "Just a maid!" She has dreams and wants of her own and she should seek them! Ignoring your own needs and wants in life is unhealthy I think.

My Vimvie still isn't working yet, I don't want her to work in some place like MacDonalds, I'm trying to convince her that she could have a career, she's recently expressed that she would like to be a photographer, and if that's what she wants then I will support her, I can't imagine it will earn much money, perhaps no money at all!

So what am I trying to say here? To tell you the truth I'm not sure? I think filipina's are possibly the most beautiful and talented women in the world and it's such an injustice that they're seemingly stuck in a "maid mentality" Who says you can't have a successful and enjoyable career of your own? Who says you can't follow your dreams of being a singer? a photographer? or whatever?

It just saddens me a bit that filipina's might be stuck in a "maid mentality" as I call it, break free of it! Follow your true calling in life! Be exactly whatever it is you want to be! You don't stop people following their dreams in life! So why on earth should anyone stop you!

[baboyako]

i think the only job peachy can do is mystery shopper

[joebloggs]

nigel you think too much

of course many are nurses and carers here , that's how they got their workpermits to come here

your right thou, with the right qualifications (if needed) they can do anything


my misses is a registered doc in the phils, but getting her registered here is an expensive never ending up hill struggle

[andypaul]

i think the only job peachy can do is mystery shopper

My Wife is the UK Branch

Nigel I know what your Saying Many Pinays do seem to lack Confidence.

But many on here have done very well, it seems in their careers.

But you do have to consider what was your Wife doing before and what qualfications does she have?

My Wife was training to Be a Nurse and went to a very good school and was near the top of her class, her sister is the same.

If her Sister was in the UK she would be looking at something like graphic design or I.T, but her big ambtion is to work in a hotel or as a Trolley dolly.

The Wife lacked confidence when she came over first she settled down and then we started looking for Jobs i was setting her up with a Basic office qualfication course which she was intrestrted in doing. Then using contatcts i have would have got her a basic admin/reception job to start off.

But before the course started she started work in a coffe shop where she ended up as a vital member of the team who from what she modestly told me ended up as a unofficial team leader.
In the same in the next coffe shop where she was head hunted ended up training and supervising staff.
I put much of this down to having been in a large family used to organisng people, being an Ate and getting things done at Family do's. Also a very strong work ethic and the abilty to pick things up as she went along.

Due to her social networking skills (many Phills seem to have these in abundance) she moved on to a department store and slowly got in to a job she loves working for her favourite make up company. She now tops the sales charts EVERY month again due to many of the skills and experience she picked up in phill.


The Jobs My wife has pays her very well has lots of perks and a pension.
She knows loads of people in the local area due to her jobs, a wide circle of friends from evry walk of life and it seems nation Shes achieved it all in less than three years.

Am i proud of her, you bet

Is she unique in her skills, not really any of the newcomers from Phill can achieve that or whats best for them.

One thing sometimes its best with jobs to let things happen. The Wife could have finished her computer course and found she was stuck in a job she didn't like for one reason or another.
She could of even completed her nursing qualfications and found that there were to many people chasing to few openings.

Nothing wrong with a shop job or working in a cafe and its always easier to find a job when you have one.

[nigel]

But before the course started she started work in a coffe shop where she ended up as a vital member of the team who from what she modestly told me ended up as a unofficial team leader.
In the same in the next coffe shop where she was head hunted ended up training and supervising staff.
I put much of this down to having been in a large family used to organisng people, being an Ate and getting things done at Family do's. Also a very strong work ethic and the abilty to pick things up as she went along.

Thanks for that mate! What you've said they're I found very interesting. Your right, filipina's are very sociable! Team players! I sometimes forget that, and yes maybe we would do well to let Vimvie just have some sort of shop job first.. like you say it's probably easier to go from job to job sort of thing!

[cheesewiz]

First of all, as everyone said here our education in the Phils are not recognized here in UK unless you are a nurse. Having any kind of job means it helps your wife confident level bec she will learn to how to interact with diff people specially with british people.

I am a caregiver and I think that's one of the hardest job you can have bec I am working with vulnerable people and the resposibility are high and very risky. Its hard to get a job that you want here in UK unless you are very competitive or unless your wife wants to go to Uni and get a degree if she is lucky she might get a nice well paid job but as I heard from my Brits colleagues their children finish a degree but having a hard time finding a job.

filipinos working here as a nurse, caregiver or maid is on a workpermit visa...this is the available job for us and the very important thing is we're earning money and contributes to UK's economy!!

[allyn]

as for my experience..
i choose to work as a room attendant (hotel maid) to gain experience and to be able to learn more about people around me, and most of all confidence

and after that i was able to apply for the real job i really like..and get into my career track..

let your wife get the small job that she think she can do to get experience and confidence for her self ...
but a piece of advice,,,tell her to avoid houskeeping, maid, or room attendant job,,,its really a hard job,,i mean really physical job...please dont get me wrong,,i know she can do that kind of job but it will really stress her out.

cheers

[ginapeterb]

My wife was a medical technologist in the Philippines, she was the Manager of a very busy Medical Diagnostic centre, when she came to UK, I told her not to bother with jobs such as caregiving, domestic jobs or fast food jobs, that is not to say I have any opinion about these jobs, in any event, I made it clear to her, my income could more than take care of our needs, but if she really wanted to work, she should take her time in applying for a job she really wanted with a good career prospect and benefits.

So for 6 months she did just that, I told her she is good enough to land a good job in local government, like many Filipinos who come here, she lacked the confidence to compete in the UK jobs market, but I told her to be more assertive, and not to feel that she is a foreigner who cannot compete on the same terms as local indigenous British people.

When she saw a job advertised in local government as a science officer, she told me she thought she had the skills and university background to go for that job, when I saw the job specification, I agreed with her, in fact I thought she was more than qualified, she was reluctant to apply, but I helped her do so.

When it came to going for the interview, she was up against 8 other applicants, most of them BRITISH, amazingly, she was the last to be interviewed, and she had only got home about 30 minutes from the interview, when she received a telephone call from the County council personnel officer asking her if she would be interested in taking up the post.

She could not believe this ? when she replied yes, they said they would send out the details of her new job and employment, she was shocked to find that she had been awarded an annual salary of more than she ever thought, plus a local authority pension and life cover.

Pinays, you can do it if you set your mind to it, my wife has now been working for a county council as a science technician for 2 years, and has not looked back.

[Tish]

I just turned 19 when I first set foot in this country, and without any qualification; not even finishing high school in the Philippines!

1. The first year was spent getting to know the place and people.
2. Second year I had our Jack, then passed my driving test (that's in 1991).
3. Third year was spent working part time to accomodate motherhood, and other life commitments. At the same time, going to college in the evening to gain GCSE's.
4. Our Mel was born in 1995, still studying and working part time.
5. Our Chloe was born in 1999, still studying and working part time.
6. When Chloe reached full time school age, I had enough GCSE's and A Levels to get me into university.

To date, I'm working for our local PCT (Primary Care Trust), earning more than twice as much as the minimum wage, and enjoying life to the full.

The message is clear, we can all do it girls! With a good support from our love ones

[PeterB]

I suspect that part of the problem is that many college graduates end up working in the likes of Jolibee or MacDonalds here in Phils. It almost seems that you need to be that highly qualified to get these kinds of jobs.

[eljean]

Most of the Filipino's develop this kind of mentality for the one big reason that Philippine is such a less progressive country which has less opportunity when it comes to work, for that reason when any filipino has to go abroad they really settle for less because they always think that it's still compensate more than what they can get it in PI the salary of a maid in abroad is actually same as the salary of a professional working in PI (why do u think teacher in PI goes to middle east to work as a domestic helper, Doctors as nurse in abroad)its because of the salary differences so that is why, and also one big thing about filipino is that we always start at scratch and climb ourself to the top

[andypaul]

Thanks for that mate! What you've said they're I found very interesting. Your right, filipina's are very sociable! Team players! I sometimes forget that, and yes maybe we would do well to let Vimvie just have some sort of shop job first.. like you say it's probably easier to go from job to job sort of thing!

Yes at the moment its best to get a decent Job and go from there. With Kingston nearby and what not lots of retail etc.
I will keep my eyes and ears open Sir.

I meet a lot of Filipinas in my work and many its noticeable are far more social than many other people in office enviroments some seem to hate it as many people in the offices just sit there in their own little worlds.

Retail and the like are far more sociable.

Like you Know Jobs should not just be for money, meeting friends, gaining skills and knowledge and hopefully enjoying yourself a little having a laugh with work mates and customers.

[andypaul]

I just turned 19 when I first set foot in this country, and without any qualification; not even finishing high school in the Philippines!

1. The first year was spent getting to know the place and people.
2. Second year I had our Jack, then passed my driving test (that's in 1991).
3. Third year was spent working part time to accomodate motherhood, and other life commitments. At the same time, going to college in the evening to gain GCSE's.
4. Our Mel was born in 1995, still studying and working part time.
5. Our Chloe was born in 1999, still studying and working part time.
6. When Chloe reached full time school age, I had enough GCSE's and A Levels to get me into university.

To date, I'm working for our local PCT (Primary Care Trust), earning more than twice as much as the minimum wage, and enjoying life to the full.

The message is clear, we can all do it girls! With a good support from our love ones

Great example

[joebloggs]

When she saw a job advertised in local government as a science officer, she told me she thought she had the skills and university background to go for that job, when I saw the job specification, I agreed with her, in fact I thought she was more than qualified, she was reluctant to apply, but I helped her do so.

When it came to going for the interview, she was up against 8 other applicants, most of them BRITISH, amazingly, she was the last to be interviewed, and she had only got home about 30 minutes from the interview, when she received a telephone call from the County council personnel officer asking her if she would be interested in taking up the post.

very similar to what happened to my misses, she went for a few interviews, at some of the interviews, they told her she was over qualified

she went for an interview working for the local nhs trust,a few hours after she got home, the manager phoned her offering her the job, like wise my wife has worked there for 2 years, got lots of experience, skills and contacts, but she's working on moving up to a better job

[Tish]

Great example

Thank you

[nigel]

Thanks for replying everyone! I've read all your messages with great interest! It's nice to hear that some filipina's are getting nice careers for themselves! Vimvie has been here about 8 months..(already been back to Philly once to visit family for a month but..) anyway, maybe she just needs a bit more time to settle in?

Thanks again everyone!

[Ann07]

i think the only job peachy can do is mystery shopper

done that as partime if they need someone nearby

[ANDRES25]

reading all the messages here really encouraged me that I can also make it when I'm already there in England. That's one of the greatest fears I have that I might not be able to get the job I want when I get there. I'm an ENGLISH Teacher here but all of my work experience is teaching Online to koreans, japanese, and Taiwanese. I really don't have any classroom setting experience and I think that's the downside of it. I just really hope I can get a job there that is still related to my course BSE ENGLISH because I'm no good at house keeping or any domestic jobs...and I really don't want to end up being a housemaid or a nanny.... just don't have the skills for that...

[KeithD]

That's one of the greatest fears I have that I might not be able to get the job I want when I get there. ...

You won't have time to work......you'll be cleaning the house, washing clothes, polishing the car, combing the grass, polishing the taps.....then after a week of that....cleaning the toilet with his toothbrush, cutting up his clothes, peeing in his food, packing your bags and buggering off

[andypaul]

Heres an example of a Pinay who now flys Jet planes?

http://www.asianjournal.com/galing-p...es-flight.html

[joebloggs]

Heres an example of a Pinay who now flys Jet planes?

http://www.asianjournal.com/galing-p...es-flight.html

to the gal

thou i would have thought most of the controls are computerised now

but if she was a spitfire pilot, that something else just you and your joystick

[andypaul]

to the gal

thou i would have thought most of the controls are computerised now

but if she was a spitfire pilot, that something else just you and your joystick

I think the g's she and others pull in them planes would leave me and you a little

Also the reactions due to the speed and brain power i think would leave us both spining Sir.

[joebloggs]

its not like it was in the old days nostalgia

come'on a spitfire pilot or a f16 no competition. spitfire wins every time..

just you and an engine , no computers, and with you chasing jerry

its so easy to make a web page now, i remember the old days,where you had to do html in notepad

[andypaul]

its not like it was in the old days nostalgia

come'on a spitfire pilot or a f16 no competition. spitfire wins every time..

just you and an engine , no computers, and with you chasing jerry

its so easy to make a web page now, i remember the old days,where you had to do html in notepad

err yeah ok Joe.

Nurse, Joes off on one again he needs his medcine please

[joebloggs]

sorry andy has some sunny d

yes i've not had my tablets to day

[andypaul]

sorry andy has some sunny d

yes i've not had my tablets to day

Have they not banned Sunny d yet that stuff makes your Brain move like an F 16

[PeterB]

i remember the old days,where you had to do html in notepad

... and still the best way - at least you know what's going on!

[Geraldine]

Hello to all!

First of all...I do work at McDonalds and Im not ashamed of it, its a decent job and my number one reason for working there is it fits my schedule as a mum. The managers are very lenient to me when it comes to my work schedule, I can change it weekly like from working once a week to working fulltime. I can just turn up at work if I want to work extra shift or just phone them that I can not make it but this rarely happens. They know that Im reliable and when Im around I really work hard and not just stand around, no need for the managers to tell me what to do. I find it fun working at Mcdo bec of the young people I work with I just find them hilarious, sometimes I get to boss them around well we just make sure everybody works. Im the only Asian as well but they are all nice to me so far. And of course we get to eat free!

Back in Phil as a BSHRM graduate, I've worked in managerial position at KFC, Jollibee then Shangrila and Mandarin Hotel. Then after I got tired of working in hotel industries I worked for an IT firm where I was a team lead. My Mum feels sorry for me when she learned that I work at Mcdo but I told her its decent and fits my time. Some of my mates told me to work in factories and care homes or as assistant nurse. To be honest I can not see myself wiping other people's , sponging dead bodies, cleaning wounds, carrying sick and smelly people, cant clean other toilets except ours... its not just my type of work. Sorry no offense meant to others...Im just being honest.

My hubby wants me to get a proper job but I said I will get a better one when the children are all going to school so I can study as well. Its not the end of the world. We all need to start somewhere at the bottom anyway and work our way up. Success is sweeter that way.

[lizaphil]

Thanks for replying everyone! I've read all your messages with great interest! It's nice to hear that some filipina's are getting nice careers for themselves! Vimvie has been here about 8 months..(already been back to Philly once to visit family for a month but..) anyway, maybe she just needs a bit more time to settle in?

Thanks again everyone!

hello nigel,
she can come here and work as a career,
like i do,she just need confidence
before i dident know anything,i dont have any experience about this work
but my hubby help me to do my refference he made it all,
so i know vemvie can do it

[Fling]

Thanks for replying everyone! I've read all your messages with great interest! It's nice to hear that some filipina's are getting nice careers for themselves! Vimvie has been here about 8 months..(already been back to Philly once to visit family for a month but..) anyway, maybe she just needs a bit more time to settle in?

Thanks again everyone!

Maybe let her check out easy jobs first, the ones she think she can do and maybe that will help her to "settle in" and go for better jobs.