How Men amuse themselves in Tescos

[andypaul]

Im sure in morrisons and SM also

Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or boyfriend along shopping. This is why we should instead go to watch Football

This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in Oxford:

Dear Mrs. Murray,

While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his antics.
Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by our surveillance cameras:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's trolleys when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.

5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calor
gas stove.

7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he began to cry and asked, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.

9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were.

10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the Mission Impossible' theme.

11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the 'Madonna look' using different size funnels.

12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled 'PICK ME!' 'PICK ME!'

13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed the foetal position and screamed 'NO! NO! It's those voices again.'

And; last, but not least:

14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while; then yelled, very loudly, 'There is no toilet paper in here.'

[fred]

I love doing the shopping these days..We go to the mall and we now have an understanding why it is such a futile exercise me actually going in with her while she shops.(she knows how bored I get)
Found a nice little expat bar just round the corner and a 3 hour session usually isn't enough.

[andypaul]

I love doing the shopping these days..We go to the mall and we now have an understanding why it is such a futile exercise me actually going in with her while she shops.(she knows how bored I get)
Found a nice little expat bar just round the corner and a 3 hour session usually isn't enough.

Indeed if i have to go to shops. With the list in hand im in and out before you know it, back home before the hours out.
With the Wife we buy the same items but somehow an afternoon/evening has just dissapeared

I think Rob needs to find a Bar nearby also otherwise i fear for the Toilet rolls safety, the supermarket row rage is buliding up

[walesrob]

I work in a supermarket, but I hate shopping in one, whether its Morrisons, Tesco or Asda - I hate the way people block your way with trolleys or their fat smelly bodies. Then theres the displays - I know I'm guilty of putting up displays of toilet rolls in the most awkward places, but in Morrisons, they do it on a grand scale, and an aisle that once had planty of room for 10 people to pass, now has only room for 2 people to pass. Grrrr...I could go on...

[KeithD]

...I could go on...

[Toyang]