Quote Originally Posted by triple5 View Post
Hello everyone.


I met my girl online a year ago this month. We took things very slowly and built a good friendship first. In september I decided to take the plunge and go and meet her. I stayed for 2 weeks and we had the most perfect time. I met her friends and family and everybody made me feel very welcome. I even moved in with her family the last few days and they threw a leaving party for me. Good memories.

When I left she was very sad, and barely said a word all morning and on the way to the airport. When I returned to the UK we would chat online everyday and I would phone almost every day. Some nights she would stay awake all night to talk with me. We made plans for our future, and it all seemed good.

Then she went away, she says to stay with family in the province. When she returned a week later things were different. No more long chats. I couldn't phone her because her brother had borrowed her phone. A few weeks later and I heard nothing from her for a week. She had been to the province again, and when I asked why she hadnt told me she just said it was a rush decision.

Christmas and she went there again. Last week she came back and we havent had a proper conversation since. I keep getting left messages on msn from her just asking, "are you there?" There's no sweetness like before. We did have pet names for each other, but she just uses my first name now. I tried calling today, it rang twice then died. I tried again and straight to the "cannot connect" message. That's happened before, like she sees my number and just disconnects.

Before she went away for christmas I asked if she would be making any new years resolutions. She said, "to stop being selfish". That seemed a strange thing to say so I asked what she meant by it. She said. "I have to consider my partners feelings more?" Again, I asked what she meant, and her answer was, "I'm getting bored of long distance relationship"
She apologised later and said she was just frustrated because she wants us to be together. Maybe that's the reason why she's being so stand offish now. She's getting bored of this. I don't know. The plan was to go and visit again in 2 months, so I would have thought she'd be happy and looking forward to that.

I feel like I've done something wrong, but have no idea what it is. I've been kind, sweet and considerate, so am left scratching my head.

I'm hoping some of the more experienced members here have some tips for me. Feel free to ask any questions.

Thanks for reading.

Hi! I just want to share my thoughts. First of all, i believe its u who could tell whether u're in a dodgy situation or not. Its u who know about your girl's personality.

Finding the right one online is like a lucky break but of course be aware that its not like a bed of roses. Make sure u're ready with the up's and down's. LDR is so very hard and sometimes painful. You have to have strong faith in your partner. Build trust and confidence otherwise your relationship will go nowhere.

Im pretty sure that there's a reason behind her "unusual" behaviour. I think u guys need a good talk about this. Some people would easily tell u to forget about her and move on...but when u love someone u cant just leave without having a good fight... right?

Im not saying here that u should ignore the red flags because obviously there's something wrong. Communication is of utmost importance in every relationship. So, try to talk to her first.

Im not putting the blame on you but it could be u said something that hurt her. (that u're not aware of) Some/most Filipinas are "onion-skinned"..they get hurt so easily....or maybe she's needing some reassurance. Double your "lambing" for her...Im sure if she loves you...she would not let you go through all these unnecessary troubles, pain and anxiety.

Goodluck!