Help i need advice! really confuse and very worried

[Ady]

Hi,

I am not here to make a judgement on you as a person. However, you are not being fair on your bf by not telling him the full truth. Always treat others as you would expect to be treated yourself.

I can understand your plight, maybe you started by not explaining it to him, meaning to tell him at a later date. But, as time wore on, it became tougher. The fact is, this guy is crazy about you, he will be more hurt about the lack of truth than your past. That is my opinion.

So, my main advice would be to tell your bf the truth, and soon. Be fair to him, put yourself in his position too. By telling him the truth, a lot of your questions become irrelevant. Because, no need to be worried that he will find out. Why do you think that he has no right to know? Westerners are more liberal, I doubt it will even be an issue in reality. Unless you are 18, then the chances are you have some "past" anyhow.

Going to your questions, you really have to tell the truth in every question asked. It just so happens that, on every UKBA Visa form, you are asked if you have ever been refused a visa to another country. You are later asked to sign that everything is correct to your knowledge. It's the equivalent of swearing an oath in many ways.

Again, I will say that your bf deserves to know everything about you. If you are hiding this, what other things are you hiding? I am not being critical for the sake of being critical. But, that is what your bf will wonder.

Everyone has a right to a fresh start. I agree fully. However, everyone has a right to know about their partners past. Particularly past marriages, engagements. If your bf cannot handle the fact you were engaged before, then is he the right guy? But, conversely, if you are not up front and honest, are you the right girl?

Time for honesty. And the first person to be honest to is the one you want to spend your life with.

Please consider, if you are serious about this guy, and he is serious about you, past marriages/engagements do not matter. They do matter, however, if they are hidden away.