And this one too.
Jealousy arises in 'loving' relationships because of three factors:
comparison, competition, and the fear of being replaced.
If we become more autonomous and self-creating,
these three features of relationships become less significant
and hence the passion of jealousy becomes less likely.
However, within ordinary, possessive relationships, jealousy is normal:
If we find ourselvesreplaced, supplanted, traded-in for a better model,
we naturally feel a tremendous sense of loss, anger, grief, and betrayal.
This bitter feeling of hurt and hostility we call "jealousy"
can become one of the most powerful obsessions of human life.
And yet, this emotion is a social product—with deep cultural roots.
If we have learned how to feel jealous, can we unlearn this response?
If we are loved for the unique persons we are becoming,
then comparison with rivals diminishes.
And when we are no longer in competition with other women or men,
we become less vulnerable to feeling jealous.
If we become irreplaceable in our relationships, then jealousy disappears.
Thus the basic way to prevent jealousy
is to become unique and irreplaceable persons.
And becoming more Authentic may be the best way
to transcend the threat of being replaced by potential rivals.
