Quote Originally Posted by PAT View Post
My fiance and I are engaged to be married this year,but I have just been made aware that we need to,and are responsible for, the support of my fiance parents as well,having assumed that my fiance,s other family would be responsible and we would contribute a small monthly allowance.

Ha Ha Ha,so there,s the catch

As much as would love to be in the position to support all,I told my fiance its not really possible at present,to which she reply she could gain extra employment to accomodate.My fiance will work with me and has suggested she will get cleaning job at night to look after her parents

Personally i dont want to loose my wife a few hours a night

All this has just become apparent,and has caused some discrepancy , I would appreciate other views and how do others deal with this?
This is something that can cause lots of trouble in a marriage so you would be well advised to get some ground rules set before you get married. It's obvious that the other family members that you mention have already made the assumption that once they have a "rich whitey" in the family and a sister living in the UK, where the streets are paved with gold, they will no longer have to worry about it because you and your new wife will shoulder the burden of supporting her parents and will also send money for every other "emergency" that crops up.

Quote Originally Posted by Piamed View Post
Hey Pat. My view is that whether its only myself working or both my wife and I, all income generated by us, goes into our immediate family pot. Then together, we will decide how much to send to extended family members and other causes.

Every couple is different and so correspondingly, are the family circumstances back home. I would encourage you both to agree what is reasonable for you to send back to da Phils on a regular basis, if required.

Btw, we send money to my in-laws in da phils and my mother here, each month. Hope that helps.

Good luck.
Right On, I think that when a Filipina marries a Brit and comes to the UK, she should understand that this is the way it is done in this country and she should certainly forget any notion that what money she earns is her own, to do with as she pleases.

Iain.