Can you forgive someone who has deeply hurt you?

[Mrs Daddy]

It depends on the situation

[JudyHon]

Yes, one chance is enough

[Arthur Little]

haha haha... Make up your mind Arthur lol...

SO I SEE YOUR ANSWER IS: IT DEPENDS LOL..

Women are allowed to change their minds ... so why shouldn't MEN be?
Actually, you're probably correct, Zobel. Based on certain 'life experiences' [probably best forgotten] my initial reaction was to vote 'No' but, I guess - having gone through the many and varied responses with a "fine toothcomb" - I'm now beginning to feel more inclined to lean towards 'It Depends'. But would you interpret such a "change of heart" as 'Maybe'? And CAN I still change my vote before close of poll without disrupting the figures already submitted?

Incidentally, I'd like to commend you on raising such a well-thought-out topic for debate. You don't happen to be a behavioural psychologist by any chance, do you?

[tiN]

I will say maybe

It is really depends on what situation u are in, possibly forgive but will never forget it

[Tawi2]

To err is human to forgive divineBut revenge is a dish best served cold

[irobot]

Irobot..." Sunny Different From The Rest..."

I have to agree with Mrs.JMajor as BASIC QUESTION with no specific question asked on the survey.

This is a view poll made up of 4 choices Only :-
Can you forgive someone who have deeply hurt you?
1= Yes
2= No
3= Maybe
4= No Comment
===========

And ... I still say NO ...

BUT..After the poll we put in some WHAT IF`S.... That will be a Can of Worms indeed some people here may just not want to open ...Phil...

[Jay&Zobel]

haha haha... Make up your mind Arthur lol...

SO I SEE YOUR ANSWER IS: IT DEPENDS LOL..

Women are allowed to change their minds ... so why shouldn't MEN be?

hahaha... yep, of course you are allowed to change your mind, lol...

Actually, you're probably correct, Zobel. Based on certain 'life experiences' [probably best forgotten] my initial reaction was to vote 'No' but, I guess - having gone through the many and varied responses with a "fine toothcomb" - I'm now beginning to feel more inclined to lean towards 'It Depends'. But would you interpret such a "change of heart" as 'Maybe'?

That's the thing! it's just so confusing. My heart is telling me to just forgive & forget but my ego is so saying: FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, YOU HAVE HURT BY THEM WHY BOTHER!!! GRRRR... (they might hurt me again...)

CAN I still change my vote before close of poll without disrupting the figures already submitted?

I don't know how to change the poll plus there aint a deadline for voting too...

Incidentally, I'd like to commend you on raising such a well-thought-out topic for debate. You don't happen to be a behavioural psychologist by any chance, do you?

Thank you and no I am not a psycholigist lol I just randomly asked it... lol...

[Jay&Zobel]

Irobot..." Sunny Different From The Rest..."

I have to agree with Mrs.JMajor as BASIC QUESTION with no specific question asked on the survey.

This is a view poll made up of 4 choices Only :-
Can you forgive someone who have deeply hurt you?
1= Yes
2= No
3= Maybe
4= No Comment
===========

And ... I still say NO ...

BUT..After the poll we put in some WHAT IF`S.... That will be a Can of Worms indeed some people here may just not want to open ...

Confusing right? lol...

[irobot]

Irobot..." Sunny Different From The Rest..."

I Fail to see what is confusing here.... Still NOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!...

*Lets not make a big thing out of what I said and forget I even said put in some What if`s as I would not like to upset the mood of this forum as it seems to be all fluffy bunny rabbits and tommy tippy ...* and stick with the original topic....

PS....by the way i have perfect eyesight with no need for glasses as yet

[pennybarry]

i couldnt live with hatred for ever i will be hurt at first but forgive them later but at my own time,i guess we are all human and not perfect so at some point we will make mistakes.

We have something in common

I agree wth you here Penny... But but but...chocolate butt...lol...hmmm?

Butt again? Just really my favourite icon.
Can't help you with that but can give you advise.
Tell Admin to delete that icon.

[Arthur Little]

Interesting to observe the way in which the number of 'Maybes' has steadily climbed higher and higher in the few days since this poll was introduced. I'd wager it won't be too long before it overtakes the others. After all, as humans, none of us is infallible, and it is therefore inevitable that the answers we provide will reflect our individual perception of the nature of the 'hurt'. Put in simple terms, it largely depends on "this, that or the other" [set of circumstances] at any given time. Does this make sense?

[Arthur Little]

To err is human to forgive divine

And NONE of us is God, after all!

[Arthur Little]

But revenge is a dish best served cold

"Vengeance is mine! " sayeth the Lord.

[SurvivingAngel]

A good question. In principle yes. Depending on what it is the person has done, I may never permit them to be in a position where they can do that again. True forgiveness has no memory so I guess I'm not perfect.

I have been hurt many times by the people I love. I have forgiven them many times as my love for them prevails.

I have also told myself I would never give them another chance to hurt me again. However, LOVE is just too strong that it outweighs the pain and I still find myself forgiving them, welcoming them back in to my life again despite the pain they have given me.

[islander]

YES!

as long as one humbly admitted his fault/mistake & would promise not to do it again.

[aromulus]

I think that subcutaneous injections of salt and chilli water, eyelid removal, insertion of cocktail stick under the fingernails and raw teeth drilling a' la "Marathon Man" would just do the jobby.....

[Mrs Daddy]

Maybe it depends on the situation!

[Alec&Davina]

it depends on how deeply they've hurt me.

[bornatbirth]

i cant of hurt all of you!

but whatever i did im sorry?

[Piamed]

I have been hurt many times by the people I love. I have forgiven them many times as my love for them prevails.

I have also told myself I would never give them another chance to hurt me again. However, LOVE is just too strong that it outweighs the pain and I still find myself forgiving them, welcoming them back in to my life again despite the pain they have given me.

Welcome them back with love certainly my sister 7x70 However, I also subscribe to scriptural guidance on wisdom, welcome them back, no problem at all but to constantly also allow myself and others to be vulnerable to the consequences derived from the actions of others is not always wise.

[Jay&Zobel]

Welcome them back with love certainly my sister 7x70

7x70 indeed... hmmm... but... lol

However, I also subscribe to scriptural guidance on wisdom, welcome them back, no problem at all but to constantly also allow myself and others to be vulnerable to the consequences derived from the actions of others is not always wise.

so better to avoid them then...hehhe....

[eagles]

no one is perfect.. DO UNTO OTHERS AS WHAT YOU WANT OTHERS DO UNTO YOU..

[Arthur Little]

no one is perfect.. DO UNTO OTHERS AS WHAT YOU WANT OTHERS DO UNTO YOU..

... better still ... DO UNTO OTHERS, AS THEY WOULD DO UNTO YOU ... ONLY, DO IT FIRST! :lol2:

[John Chingford]

It is much easier to forgive if you have experienced the wonderful forgiving power of Jesus. When you come face to face with the holiness/perfection of God you suddenly realise how wretched we ALL are in God's sight in comparison with HIS absolute glory. The fact that Jesus suffered God's wrath (in our place) for the terror of our sinful nature so that we can receive HIS forgiveness enables us to forgive others. Jesus said that if (after all this forgiveness) if we still do not forgive those who fail us (a much lower debt in comparison) we cease to benefit from God's forgiveness.

[John Chingford]

I have many times been deeply hurt by the way so called friends have treated me. I can absolutely testify that (with God's help) you can forgive. It is just a question of first knowing you MUST forgive, secondly, knowing it is possible, thirdly knowing that you must activate it as soon as possible for your own good. Apparently many illnesses can start from having an unforgiving attitude. Bitterness is a VERY bad thing and can cripple you.

The best thing to do is have a forgiving heart at all times and a generous spirit towards them. If they seek forgiveness receive them with open arms. If they do not change and you cannot trust them a different matter. You must still forgive but that doesn't mean they can still remain your friend or that you can trust them. They need to earn back your trust. But love them anyway, but be wary of them

[JudyHon]

Irobot..." Sunny Different From The Rest..."

I have to agree with Mrs.JMajor as BASIC QUESTION with no specific question asked on the survey.

This is a view poll made up of 4 choices Only :-
Can you forgive someone who have deeply hurt you?
1= Yes
2= No
3= Maybe
4= No Comment
===========

And ... I still say NO ...

BUT..After the poll we put in some WHAT IF`S.... That will be a Can of Worms indeed some people here may just not want to open ...Phil...

Not sure Option 4 is necessary?

[eagles]

arthur Thanks for sharing the same personal value as mine....

[John Chingford]

Which of us are perfect that never hurt anybody (hands on hearts here - be honest). The world would be a better place if we could all forgive those who are deeply apologetic. How can we stand in the place of God and think we have the right standing to judge one another. In God's eyes none of us would stand if it wasn't for Christ being penalised by the Father, taking our place. If those who have wronged us are unrepentant then you just need to let them go, but let go of your hurt. Please see my previous comments regarding how we can forgive

[Arthur Little]

Not sure Option 4 is necessary?

... it ISN'T! ... because if any reader didn't wish to pass comment, he/she wouldn't - or shouldn't - enter into the debate in the first place.

[Jay&Zobel]

It is much easier to forgive if you have experienced the wonderful forgiving power of Jesus. When you come face to face with the holiness/perfection of God you suddenly realise how wretched we ALL are in God's sight in comparison with HIS absolute glory. The fact that Jesus suffered God's wrath (in our place) for the terror of our sinful nature so that we can receive HIS forgiveness enables us to forgive others. Jesus said that if (after all this forgiveness) if we still do not forgive those who fail us (a much lower debt in comparison) we cease to benefit from God's forgiveness.

I have many times been deeply hurt by the way so called friends have treated me. I can absolutely testify that (with God's help) you can forgive. It is just a question of first knowing you MUST forgive, secondly, knowing it is possible, thirdly knowing that you must activate it as soon as possible for your own good. Apparently many illnesses can start from having an unforgiving attitude. Bitterness is a VERY bad thing and can cripple you.

The best thing to do is have a forgiving heart at all times and a generous spirit towards them. If they seek forgiveness receive them with open arms. If they do not change and you cannot trust them a different matter. You must still forgive but that doesn't mean they can still remain your friend or that you can trust them. They need to earn back your trust. But love them anyway, but be wary of them

Very well said