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A friend in this situation once told me 'I can forgive, but I can never forget'...
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SJ
opps..double post.
sure I can forgive him But never forget what he has done to me on how he made me feel. It is better to disconnect that person in my life. I'm afraid he will hurt me again. :( life is too short to live and to suffer with a person who is "genetically cold" and never change his backward behaviour. I'm glad he's gone in my life.
Dont go to bed hurt and angry.
Stay up and plot your revenge.
"10% of life is made up of what happens to you, 90% is decided by how you react"
"The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost"
Sophie HUH???????? Surprised you said that?????? Obviously you are joking! We as Christians have been forgiven much by God. He who is forgiven much, loves much. Therefore as Christians we can forgive anything because NOTHING compares with how much God has forgiven us through the death of Jesus on the cross. How can we dare withhold forgiveness? Who do we think we are? Are we God, that we have the right for vengence. Bible says "vengence is mine says the Lord". Bible teaches us if we do not forgive, we will not experience God's forgiveness. Only God has the right to bring judgement on a guilty act - not us. Jesus said that holding onto unforgiveness is like putting yourself into your own dungeon. You will not get out until you can forgive.
As the days of Noah were so shall be the coming of the Son of Man........ When You see these things happening, know that the time is close.
Matthew 24 :
Check Out My Blogsite For Evidence Why The Bible Can Be Trusted
I wrote the following on page 2 of this thread. In case the message gets lost on page 3 I write it out again.
It is much easier to forgive if you have experienced the wonderful forgiving power of Jesus. When you come face to face with the holiness/perfection of God you suddenly realise how wretched we ALL are in God's sight in comparison with HIS absolute glory. The fact that Jesus suffered God's wrath (in our place) for the terror of our sinful nature so that we can receive HIS forgiveness enables us to forgive others. Jesus said that if (after all this forgiveness) if we still do not forgive those who fail us (a much lower debt in comparison) we cease to benefit from God's forgiveness.
I have many times been deeply hurt by the way so called friends have treated me. I can absolutely testify that (with God's help) you can forgive. It is just a question of first knowing you MUST forgive, secondly, knowing it is possible, thirdly knowing that you must activate it as soon as possible for your own good. Apparently many illnesses can start from having an unforgiving attitude. Bitterness is a VERY bad thing and can cripple you.
The best thing to do is have a forgiving heart at all times and a generous spirit towards them. If they seek forgiveness receive them with open arms. If they do not change and you cannot trust them a different matter. You must still forgive but that doesn't mean they can still remain your friend or that you can trust them. They need to earn back your trust. But love them anyway, but be wary of them
Which of us are perfect that never hurt anybody (hands on hearts here - be honest). The world would be a better place if we could all forgive those who are deeply apologetic. How can we stand in the place of God and think we have the right standing to judge one another. In God's eyes none of us would stand if it wasn't for Christ being penalised by the Father, taking our place. If those who have wronged us are unrepentant then you just need to let them go, but let go of your hurt.
As the days of Noah were so shall be the coming of the Son of Man........ When You see these things happening, know that the time is close.
Matthew 24 :
Check Out My Blogsite For Evidence Why The Bible Can Be Trusted
The bible quotes "do not let the sun go down on your anger". So the quote "do not go to bed angry" is actually a bible quote. Just thought you would like to know.
As the days of Noah were so shall be the coming of the Son of Man........ When You see these things happening, know that the time is close.
Matthew 24 :
Check Out My Blogsite For Evidence Why The Bible Can Be Trusted
I am so blessed with your messages.. Thank you...
This is a realization:
Galatians 5:19-21 (NLT):
When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, your lives will produce these evil results: sexual immorality, impure thoughts, eagerness for lustful pleasure, idolatry, participation in demonic activities, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, divisions, the feeling that everyone is wrong except those in your own little group, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other kinds of sin. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.
Wow! I thought, this means most of us aren't even coming close to what we're meant to be.
I can forgive, I know I can... I just need to forgive myself first (and that will happen..NOW)!!!
Thank you so much for all your replies thank you!![]()
yes i can forgive and once i forgive, i forget the person who deeply hurt me because they are not worth thinking of..they bloody nightmares![]()
As the days of Noah were so shall be the coming of the Son of Man........ When You see these things happening, know that the time is close.
Matthew 24 :
Check Out My Blogsite For Evidence Why The Bible Can Be Trusted
You are right that none of us live close to that list, but that passage is not saying that if we dont we do not go to Heaven. The whole letter to Galatians was written because some people were trying to get the gentile and jewish believers to return back to the law. Paul was pointing out that the law has never and can never save us because of our corrupt sinful nature. However, being filled with the Holy Spirit produces a change in us. We are being changed from one degree of glory to another and He who began a good work in us will bring it to completion throughout our lives as long as we do not try to save ourselves by works but allow the Holy Spirit to have His way in us.
Paul is pointing out that if we try to enter the kingdom of God by our own works we will fail. But he also stated that "thanks be to God, through Jesus Christ that he has been set free from the law of sin and death" and we are now free to walk in newness of life by the power of the Holy Spirit
As the days of Noah were so shall be the coming of the Son of Man........ When You see these things happening, know that the time is close.
Matthew 24 :
Check Out My Blogsite For Evidence Why The Bible Can Be Trusted
As the days of Noah were so shall be the coming of the Son of Man........ When You see these things happening, know that the time is close.
Matthew 24 :
Check Out My Blogsite For Evidence Why The Bible Can Be Trusted
but I can't forget about it.
It will be hard for others, but i do believe that "time heals all wounds" but no matter how much you have forgiven a person, still you can not forget what he/she has done,.. and because of this there will some changes on the relationship, the closeness of each other will not be the same anymore., or the trust can't be brought back...![]()
Hi AryM, I would like to requote a part of one of my posts in answer to you:
"The best thing to do is have a forgiving heart at all times and a generous spirit towards them. If they seek forgiveness receive them with open arms. If they do not change and you cannot trust them a different matter. You must still forgive but that doesn't mean they can still remain your friend or that you can trust them. They need to earn back your trust. But love them anyway, but be wary of them"
Of course it is much easier to do this if we are talking about friends/enemies but if you are referring to a husband - not so easy. Very delicate.
If a husband or wife has done something which hurts deeply it IS very difficult to continue your life as if nothing happened. It DID happen! You are not expected to forget it, but you should forgive!
The bible says that God remembers our sins no more. It doesn't say He forgets because God is perfect and cannot forget but He CHOOSES to remember no more. A matter of choice to choose not to keep bringing it back up in your thoughts. If your husband shows evidence of remorse you should forgive. If the fruit of his remorse shows a change of heart in him, it IS possible to regain your trust in him. Yes, it may take time but where forgiveness abounds hurts heal much more quickly. But what if he is not remorseful or does not have a change of heart? What should you do?
It all depends upon what he has done. In the case of adultery, if he refuses to change there is only one option open according to the bible and that is separation, but NOT divorce. The bible teaches that if 2 people cannot resolve their differences they should remain separated until they can be reconciled, but they are not allowed to remarry someone else because in God's eyes the first 2 are still married together. However, this rule is specifically for born-again committed christians, who seek to put God first in their lives.
I wrote this on the thread entitled
What do you think? should love should be unconditional? I think it might be appropriate.
"Love is not love if it is conditional - it is purely selfish love. ie "I will love you if you do this or that". Where is the security in a relationship if one or the other always wonders if they are meeting the conditions or not. I mean, will you ever be secure that the other partner is not going to leave because you have not satisfied them enough. For a marriage to work it is important to understand that it is a lifetime committment NO MATTER WHAT in God's eyes. The law of the land should NEVER overide what God set in place. Two people should understand (before they get married) that it should be a lifetime committment with NO conditions set on each other apart from loving each other. If either of the parties is not prepared for that, they should NOT get married!
I can empathise and sympathise with those marriages where one of the partners totally lives for themselves.
It is indeed true that the only one who shows unconditional love is Jesus. It is not true that He puts conditions on that love. Ephesians chapter 2 says that we are saved by grace (God's unmerited favour, unearned) not by works, ie there are no "works" required as a condition to receive that love. All we need to do is simply believe on Him (after presenting your soul to Him in repentance) and rest on the assurance that you can now experience His love unconditionally because He has made you clean inside and out from your sinful nature. So from that moment, the relationship with God is like a marriage. It is a contract which we both enter into. Once you decide to receive Him as your Saviour He will love you without conditions because He has bought you with His blood into His family. He will NEVER cease to love you from that moment - no matter what you do.
The greek word "AGAPE" means divine love and is unconditional love. It is agape love referred to in 1 Corinthians 13 when it says love is patient, love is kind, love is long suffering, love bears all things etc. Actually we of ourselves cannot achieve this in our sinful fallen nature. This is divine love. However, with Jesus living in us through His Holy Spirit we are empowered to manage that sort of love.
Regards relationships: it is true that two people cannot function properly in a relationship if one does all the taking and the other all the giving. If two people are committed christians who love God first, the relationship is more likely to flourish but if one or both of you are not "born-again" by the Holy Spirit I think that ground rules are necessary because without divine love within your souls I think unconditional love is impossible.
But once you make the decision to get married then whatever happens you MUST do everything you can to make the marriage work because of your vows"
As the days of Noah were so shall be the coming of the Son of Man........ When You see these things happening, know that the time is close.
Matthew 24 :
Check Out My Blogsite For Evidence Why The Bible Can Be Trusted
John, as an active Elder in the Church of Scotland for more than three decades, I'm prepared to take on board much of what you're trying to convey in this latest post. But, my mind keeps focussing on the above passage - which I've extracted for quotation here - because it would seem to imply that EVEN inherently-:icon_evil: dictators such as the likes of Adolf Hitler would've been absolved of the terrible atrocities they'd committed *if, [a *condition] by the end of their lives, they had professed Jesus Christ to be their Saviour.And this whole concept greatly troubles me ... I mean, surely, in God's Name, these people are utterly BEYOND redemption!
Remember the two criminals who were crucified with Jesus. "today you will be with me in paradise". Also the parable of the workers in the field. Those who worked hardest in the heat of the day complained that the master gave the same wage (salvation) to those who only worked 1 hour. The master said that He can show mercy if He wants to - it is His money (salvation).
However, I believe that some people can harden their hearts against God one too many times, that even though Jesus would still receive them (if they repented) they probably are incapable of repenting - eg Pharoah. Hitler may be one such person - maybe!
As the days of Noah were so shall be the coming of the Son of Man........ When You see these things happening, know that the time is close.
Matthew 24 :
Check Out My Blogsite For Evidence Why The Bible Can Be Trusted
Someone responded to what I wrote privately. This persons question maybe is being asked by others. Therefore, I give my answer here too.
Only two of the 4 gospels specifically state the crime of the criminals. These gospels say the prominent 3 people (probably many others also were being crucified) were Jesus and 2 robbers. The impression given is that both these reviled Jesus at first but then the second one was probably suddenly convicted by the sheer holy and loving presence of Jesus. His eyes were opened to who Jesus was, he repented and then surrendered his soul to Jesus.
You may say that it is easier to forgive a robber for his sin. Maybe, but the point is that with God there are no degrees of sin because "all have sinned and fallen short of God's standard" Romans 3:23.
We put degrees on sin, but God sees that ALL our righteous acts (in comparison with God's perfection and glory) are like filthy rags. We ALL need God's mercy. The parable of the workers is that God has mercy on those he chooses to have mercy, which is EVERYONE who repents - even at the last minute. Thank God for that. What if it was you who had lived a life rejecting Christ and at the last minute (before death) you came to your senses, asking for His mercy and He said "too late". Mind you as none of us know the hour of our death I do not recommend you wait until then. Besides a lifetime of hardening your heart to God can result in a permanent hardness of conscience making it impossible for you to want salvation later.
Yes, you are right we are human and do not show signs (as unregenerate people) of being in God's image. The Bible says that Adam and Eve were perfect (in God's image) at the beginning until they succumbed to disobedience. From that moment on a decay began in their souls and bodies. The part of them that was in the image of God, died.
Please read Ephesians 2: 1-10. This is a wonderful passage showing what it is to be born again. It explains how receiving Jesus into our hearts brings our souls alive again. From the moment we receive Jesus as our Saviour He begins a work in us of transforming us little by litte. One of these changes is an ability to forgive.
As the days of Noah were so shall be the coming of the Son of Man........ When You see these things happening, know that the time is close.
Matthew 24 :
Check Out My Blogsite For Evidence Why The Bible Can Be Trusted
If the hurt was caused by accident, yes, easily.
If the hurt was caused by a premeditated plan, no, but revenge would make it easier to live with.
Revenge would mean watching the person wallow in the mire of their bad karma, it is not likely anything more would be needed, as they would most likely self destruct, given enough rope![]()
they are already forgiven ages ago lol
here's the prayer
Our Father, Who is in heaven,
Holy is Your Name;
Your kingdom come,
Your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our sins,
as we forgive those who sin against us;
and lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil. Amen.
all things are possible!
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