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Thread: Ten Commandments

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    Administrator KeithD's Avatar
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    Ten Commandments

    How many can HONESTLY say they have not broken one of the Ten Commandments?

    1. You shall have no other Gods but me. (But which God? What if an Egyptian God was pretending to be a Roman God pretending to be a God!!! )
    2. You shall not make for yourself any idol, nor bow down to it or worship it. - If I bow someone had better call me an ambulance
    3. You shall not misuse the name of the Lord your God. - Oh Bugger!!!
    4. You shall remember and keep the Sabbath day holy. - Oh Bugger!!!
    5. Respect your father and mother. - Oh Bugger!!!
    6. You must not kill. - Oh Bugger!!! Killed plants & insects!! It is not a very specific statement!
    7. You must not commit adultery. - Oh Bugger!!!
    8. You must not steal. - Oh Bugger!!!
    9. You must not give false evidence against your neighbour. - I claim the 5th!!
    10. You must not be envious of your neighbour's goods. You shall not be envious of his house nor his wife, nor anything that belongs to your neighbour. - This kind of buggers up Filipina's with 4x4's, Sony, etc,
    Keith - Administrator


  2. #2
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    11th Commandment
    11. Thou shalt all donate
    "10% of life is made up of what happens to you, 90% is decided by how you react"
    "The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost"


  3. #3
    Administrator KeithD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sophie View Post
    11th Commandment
    11. Thou shalt all donate
    Sperm!!!
    Keith - Administrator


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    When I was a teenager, the Black Sabbath day was holy.
    They were so loud in concert, seems strange now that thousands of kids stood on chairs giving two peace signs to Ozzy.
    We all had sore necks the following day.


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    Sorry, cant help to ....


  6. #6
    Respected Member bornatbirth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Win2Win View Post
    Sperm!!!
    whens collection day?

    and where will you like the deposit!
    i have learnt to do what my wife says!


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    Quote Originally Posted by bornatbirth View Post
    whens collection day?

    and where will you like the deposit!
    recipient anyone?
    "10% of life is made up of what happens to you, 90% is decided by how you react"
    "The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost"


  8. #8
    Administrator KeithD's Avatar
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    I guess no one here has abided by all of them then! See y'all in the burning fury........otherwise known as the Mojave Desert
    Keith - Administrator


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    Quote Originally Posted by Win2Win View Post
    I guess no one here has abided by all of them then! See y'all in the burning fury........otherwise known as the Mojave Desert
    Say hello to Don van Vliet (Captain Beefheart) if you bump into him there.
    One of my musical heroes.


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    Quote Originally Posted by aposhark View Post
    Say hello to Don van Vliet (Captain Beefheart) if you bump into him there.
    One of my musical heroes.
    Quote Originally Posted by aposhark View Post
    Say hello to Don van Vliet (Captain Beefheart) if you bump into him there.
    (One of my musical heroes)
    Guess he heard you the first time.....


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    Respected Member Gavanddal's Avatar
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    I went to a church wedding on Saturday. Most people in there that I knew were atheists.

    The vicar did the bit about "what God has joined may no man put asunder" or whatever it is and then clarified the point by saying that if that joining is broken then you'd evoke the wrath of God.

    I didn't see any of us who have ex-wives being struck down at that point. And you wonder why we don't believe!


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    Quote Originally Posted by Gavanddal View Post

    I didn't see any of us who have ex-wives being struck down at that point. And you wonder why we don't believe!
    How would you call having two mothers in law....???


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    Respected Member Gavanddal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by aromulus View Post
    How would you call having two mothers in law....???
    I don't have any at all now.


  14. #14
    Administrator KeithD's Avatar
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    Patio foundations!
    Keith - Administrator


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