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Thread: Needs advice

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    Respected Member scottishbride's Avatar
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    Needs advice

    Hi, I haven't been here for a long time. It's been over 2 months now since my hubby left for work. He is working as a enginneer in the oil ship and he had to leave me and my baby for 3 months which is really hard! I have to deal with everything alone! We are living in the Philippines right now but moving to the UK hopefully this year! And I think I will need loads and loads of adjustment in UK! Any advice?


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    Hi Mel, so what advice you want


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    Respected Member scottishbride's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs.JMajor View Post
    Hi Mel, so what advice you want
    Is it more harder to live and deal everything in UK? How are you anyway? enjoying life in UK? Kaw ha, di ka na maka relate palibhasa kasama mo hubby mo.


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    Respected Member Jay&Zobel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by scottishbride View Post
    Hi, I haven't been here for a long time. It's been over 2 months now since my hubby left for work. He is working as a enginneer in the oil ship and he had to leave me and my baby for 3 months which is really hard! I have to deal with everything alone! We are living in the Philippines right now but moving to the UK hopefully this year! And I think I will need loads and loads of adjustment in UK! Any advice?
    Awww... my brother is a marine engineer in an oil tanker ship as well & he has a young family in PI. My sister-in-law gave birth with their 2 kids without him being there with her... Really sad...

    But they have househelpers & nannies so kind of help her in everyday tasks... but of course missing each other & being together as a family is another story...

    What to advice?
    Hmmm... while you are in the PI, get some help when you can, enjoy yourself and your baby, keep yourself busy and think positive (like instead of thinking: "My husband is away, i feel so lonely huhuhu etc etc..." but think positively & excitedly "We will be together soon, we only have 10weeks/9 weeks/5 weeks... left to be together! whoohooo"
    That's how they (sister-in-law & brother) think...

    Our thoughts are with you...


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    Respected Member Jay&Zobel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by scottishbride View Post
    Is it more harder to live and deal everything in UK?
    I'll answer that question:

    To be honest, I never thought that I will be able to make it here. No househelpers, nannies etc... But things are well sometimes we under estimate our abilities & capabilities (I am sure new Mums will agree with me). Do not worry, you will be fine. Just be openminded. Do not think too much, it will not give you any better.

    Funny enough, my brother emailed me and asked me series of questions:
    "Who cooks? Who takes care of the baby? Who cleans? Wash the dishes? DO you need a nanny?Is it easy to hire a nanny form the PI? etc etc etc..."
    Obviously hehe, he was just worried about me here hehe...
    But hey, it seems that it's not that easy, but it is...

    Stay happy & think positive always!!!


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    Quote Originally Posted by scottishbride View Post
    Is it more harder to live and deal everything in UK? How are you anyway? enjoying life in UK? Kaw ha, di ka na maka relate palibhasa kasama mo hubby mo.


    No, you can make it Mel, one thing I am in trouble is when i buy things/stuff cant decide if I convert in peso I am a person who spend money wisely, but the rest you can make it, weather wasnt big deal at all to me now I am great, soon to work didnt realize getting CRB took weeks b4 you can start the job, been 2 weeks now when I passed the interview and I had to wait for the CRB and my references reply


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    Respected Member scottishbride's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jay&Zobel View Post
    I'll answer that question:

    To be honest, I never thought that I will be able to make it here. No househelpers, nannies etc... But things are well sometimes we under estimate our abilities & capabilities (I am sure new Mums will agree with me). Do not worry, you will be fine. Just be openminded. Do not think too much, it will not give you any better.

    Funny enough, my brother emailed me and asked me series of questions:
    "Who cooks? Who takes care of the baby? Who cleans? Wash the dishes? DO you need a nanny?Is it easy to hire a nanny form the PI? etc etc etc..."
    Obviously hehe, he was just worried about me here hehe...
    But hey, it seems that it's not that easy, but it is...

    Stay happy & think positive always!!!
    Hi Zobel,

    Thank you for the detailed reply. I highly appreciate your advice. At least I know I'm not the only one.We are exactly the same, nanny, cook, maid and a driver! Very hands on Mum, and I really need to deal with everything alone. We are moving to the UK this year and I know I will need loads of adjustments. My husband said I will suffer from cold weather! I told him to buy me loads of nice coats and boots! LOL! Once again, thank you and God bless!


    Mel


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    Respected Member scottishbride's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs.JMajor View Post


    No, you can make it Mel, one thing I am in trouble is when i buy things/stuff cant decide if I convert in peso I am a person who spend money wisely, but the rest you can make it, weather wasnt big deal at all to me now I am great, soon to work didnt realize getting CRB took weeks b4 you can start the job, been 2 weeks now when I passed the interview and I had to wait for the CRB and my references reply
    First of all congrats! These days, its really hard to find a job.Naku, if your converting to peso wala kang mabibili! I was like that when I was in Dubai, I will go on shopping and ended up buying nothing!!! Anyway, thanks for the advice and hope to see you soon in flesh!

    Melxxx


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    Respected Member miss.piggy's Avatar
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    Wink

    Quote Originally Posted by scottishbride View Post
    Hi, I haven't been here for a long time. It's been over 2 months now since my hubby left for work. He is working as a enginneer in the oil ship and he had to leave me and my baby for 3 months which is really hard! I have to deal with everything alone! We are living in the Philippines right now but moving to the UK hopefully this year! And I think I will need loads and loads of adjustment in UK! Any advice?
    Hello Scottishbride...

    That's right, do not underestimate the adjustments you have to make when you get here. Life in the UK is not easy specially when you're new -- imagine that you won't have much friends here (if none at all), nor family who would be there for you anytime. It isn't easy, but it can get better specially that you'd be with your husband more often than if you're in the Philippines.

    My advice...check with your husband where you'd be living in the UK. Then you can start checking on the place now using the internet and start finding any organisations there, be it social or religious (as we are all believed to be religious anyways). Then meet people and don't be shy to introduce yourself and make friends. These people can be your support group. It's also an idea to bring your nanay with you up until you are adjusted to your new set up.

    Wishing you all the best!


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    Quote Originally Posted by miss.piggy View Post
    It's also an idea to bring your nanay with you up until you are adjusted to your new set up.Wishing you all the best!
    I wonder if that easy to bring nanay in the UK, I heard one of Maria's friend ,she did able to....


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    Respected Member miss.piggy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs.JMajor View Post
    I wonder if that easy to bring nanay in the UK
    Hi Mrs.JMajor... it isn't difficult bringing relatives (mother, father or siblings) to the UK as long as it's just for a visit and well supported by their relative who is in the UK - there should be invitation, bank statements proving that you can really support nanay's stay, etc. I have both my parents and my brother-in-law came to the UK and I've never heard of any hassles in getting their visas. As a matter of fact, they were not interviewed at all but granted a multiple entry visa. As long as everything's legitimate and the embassy would see there is no hanky panky, I'm sure everything will be alright. I always say the British Embassy in Manila is very reasonable. :@>


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    Respected Member miss.piggy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs.JMajor View Post
    I wonder if that easy to bring nanay in the UK, I heard one of Maria's friend ,she did able to....
    It isn't that difficult to bring relatives (mother, father, siblings) to the UK as long as it's for a visit, and they are well supported by you -- with invite, bank statements, etc. Both my parents and my bro-in-law came to the UK last year for a visit and I've never heard of any hassles whatsoever. They were granted a multiple entry visa without an interview. As long as the papers are okay and the embassy could clearly see there is no hanky panky, I'm sure there won't be any probs. I always say that the British Embassy in Manila is indeed reasonable.


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    Your one of the lucky then,


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    Respected Member miss.piggy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs.JMajor View Post
    Your one of the lucky then,
    Hmmm...not sure if that is out of luck really. I know quite a few people around who managed to have their relatives here too...It's just a matter of proving that these people are significant to you, and that they will go on or before the date they need to leave the UK.

    Have you heard of any unlucky ones so far???


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    Quote Originally Posted by miss.piggy View Post
    Hmmm...not sure if that is out of luck really. I know quite a few people around who managed to have their relatives here too...It's just a matter of proving that these people are significant to you, and that they will go on or before the date they need to leave the UK.

    Have you heard of any unlucky ones so far???
    Yep, I had (teacher) friend, her daughter married with brit guy and they (the couple) invite his brother to visit them to UK, the guy(brit hub) doing a good business and quite well off, ECO denied the application of the brother, I assume lack of info/documents in thier part I guess,they appeal and spend money for that, the decision still denied


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    Respected Member miss.piggy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs.JMajor View Post
    Yep, I had (teacher) friend, her daughter married with brit guy and they (the couple) invite his brother to visit them to UK, the guy(brit hub) doing a good business and quite well off, ECO denied the application of the brother, I assume lack of info/documents in thier part I guess,they appeal and spend money for that, the decision still denied
    Hmmm...I don't know what to say. The requirements / check list is very precise and straight forward, so it's either you submit these papers or you don't. Perhaps it's how the brother composed himself while at the Embassy? Any embassies will feel suspicious of nervous tweeks even if they are just the way they are? Anyways, these are all speculations now, but it's bad that happened and hopefully he gets a visa later on when he decide to try again. :-)


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    Quote Originally Posted by miss.piggy View Post
    Hmmm...I don't know what to say. The requirements / check list is very precise and straight forward, so it's either you submit these papers or you don't. Perhaps it's how the brother composed himself while at the Embassy? Any embassies will feel suspicious of nervous tweeks even if they are just the way they are? :-)
    He never even met the ECO, he didnt able to go to Embassy, he just submit his documents at VFS and after some months they txt him to collect his doc, found out he got denied, he dont want to try again, but the mother like w/c is a tcher, that case she may had one I guess as obviously she is working in goverment and 55 yrs old


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    Respected Member miss.piggy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs.JMajor View Post
    He never even met the ECO, he didnt able to go to Embassy, he just submit his documents at VFS and after some months they txt him to collect his doc, found out he got denied, he dont want to try again, but the mother like w/c is a tcher, that case she may had one I guess as obviously she is working in goverment and 55 yrs old
    ouch, that hurts when you don't even reach the interview stage and get refused! However, I still want to believe the embassy has got a solid ground why he was refused, whatever it is, we don't know :-).

    yeah, the nanay should give it a go. there should be no probs with that. i know someone who brought her mother here and they're not exactly well off but they managed it.


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