Good morning

[Grievous Angel]

If you dont mind my asking G.Angel, how old is your lady?.. Hope you consider Age sometime in a way contributes to someone attitudes and behavior... I would agree with Mod Aromulos that this might be an early sign of 'homesick' and with the combination of insecurity etc ... Points noted best is make her feel 'secure' and top of your priority.. as per Mrs M!



my 2cents... Good luck..

Neither of us are "teenagers", just setting out in the world...... there are 5yrs between our ages.

[Jay&Zobel]

... and many things to ponder on.

Mrs JMajor .... we do EVERYTHING together, I wouldn't want it any other way.
Re; the dinner ... it was a BUSINESS (work) dinner, with colleagues I see only 3-4 times a year. I'd already postponed it twice .... and no others brought their wives or girlfriends. It was over by 9.30ish, and that was why I'd suggested she meet me afterwards at the restaurant.

Lets try another example ....
I was invited to a Wedding Anniversity party. The invite arrived in the post with my name on it many, many months ago.
"Why isn't my name on it ?"
"Because they are not aware of you... it's someone i see very rarely, so are unaware that you and I are a couple. They,ve always known me as single. But I've called them up and told them I'm bringing you"
"I'm not going unless my name is on the invitation"
.... so I got them to send a new invitation.
The night of the party....
I explained that knowing the people & where it was held, and the "style" of the invite, the women would be wearing long / cocktail dresses and the men, suits.
"I'm wearing jeans"
"If that's what you want, feel comfortable in.... but all the other women will be wearing a dress, and you'll be the odd-one-out"
"I'm wearing jeans... not interested in what they are wearing"
So, I also dress down , hang the suit back up in the wardrobe.

We arrive.....
"All the women are wearing dresses..... I totally stand out"
"Darling, I told you, I explained this"
"Well, you should have INSISTED on me wearing a dress, you should have DEMANDED it..... well. I'm not staying. You can if you want... I'll sit and wait in the car"
So I gave my apologies to the host/hostess and left.


I'll put up with lots of things .... I appreciate the "transition" is difficult, and I'm always there with a smile, a kiss, support, a hug .....
.... but it's so so difficult

Neither of us are "teenagers", just setting out in the world...... there are 5yrs between our ages.

Aaawww...that's really awful! She has to think that it's not you that only needs adjusting (about her behaviour), but her too! She is in Britain now and she has to make an effort to fit-in as well.

I'm really sorry... I hate to think this, but was/is she just after the visa? citizenship?

[NtoN]

Aaawww...that's really awful! She has to think that it's not you that only needs adjusting (about her behaviour), but her too! She is in Britain now and she has to make an effort to fit-in as well.

I agree! Marriage is supposedly a lifetime commitment. Being through thick & thin is the greatest covenant you can give to each other. Attaining this entails a lot of sacrifice & understanding of each others differences. We all have unique personalities and coping from this requires a higher level of maturity. There are lots of possible factors affecting her behaviour (e.g. silent battle against homesickness, exposure to society, family upbringing, geographic & lifestyle change etc) and it would be unfair to her if you are not open about your sentiments towards it. It is always best to be honest no matter how difficult the circumstance is. It’s true that she’s already in Britain and she has to make an effort to fit in. Your fiancée needs a lot of growing. Make a reality check and if everything else fails, buy her a homebound ticket. Good luck! Keep the faith!

[aromulus]

Neither of us are "teenagers", just setting out in the world...... there are 5yrs between our ages.

I am going to burst your bubble.....

I am not an agony uncle, but my advice is to send her back home and let her languish there until grown up.

I cannot see an armonious future for you and her together, she is spoiled and she's got you in a "butty"....
I can "feel" some red flags and the more I re-read your posts, the more wary I become of the futility of the relationship set out on "her" terms.

It doesn't matter wether you are in love or not, it is high time for an old fashioned ultimatum.
It is your future at stake.... With or without her.

Sorry pal.
That's the way I see it.

[bornatbirth]

I am going to burst your bubble.....

I am not an agony uncle, but my advice is to send her back home and let her languish there until grown up.

I cannot see an armonious future for you and her together, she is spoiled and she's got you in a "butty"....
I can "feel" some red flags and the more I re-read your posts, the more wary I become of the futility of the relationship set out on "her" terms.

It doesn't matter wether you are in love or not, it is high time for an old fashioned ultimatum.
It is your future at stake.... With or without her.

Sorry pal.
That's the way I see it.

you could get tough with her but give what i posted a try first?

also how is the rest of life with her?

you really need to get into her head and see how her world is before you react to her!

[scott&ligaya]

Heh Mrs M, please don't get offended, sometimes it is easy for miscommunication between forum members, all is love and peace here, just you keep right on chatting

[estherboaz]

I am going to burst your bubble.....

I am not an agony uncle, but my advice is to send her back home and let her languish there until grown up.

I cannot see an armonious future for you and her together, she is spoiled and she's got you in a "butty"....
I can "feel" some red flags and the more I re-read your posts, the more wary I become of the futility of the relationship set out on "her" terms.

It doesn't matter wether you are in love or not, it is high time for an old fashioned ultimatum.
It is your future at stake.... With or without her.

Sorry pal.
That's the way I see it.

[tomm]

That's Filipina for you, all over the place

Don't forget, a certain times of the month all women can lose the plot.

But apart from the tampo... how's the rest of the relationship?

[trader dave]

i have sat here and read some ot this and i can relate with some of it ,my now wife is a normal young pilipina and jelious thats in there nature



to tell you straight i would not get married i would pack her back home tell her to grow up and enjoy your life

because believe me there are many many more who would love the chance to come to uk and have a loving ,caring husband get rid of her and go to the philippines and find another it is that easy

even if you ask on here i am sure members know of pilipinas who are looking for a lovely man to look after them and care for them

[aphrodite78]

there maybe an underlying issues i.e. is she preggy? or monthly period? do you make her feel secure / wanted? if not then i think you need to re-evaluate your relationship and whatever you choose stick with it and make it work. good luck

[Tawi2]

Theres enough stable and decent ladies in the world to not waste time on one who sounds as if she has underlying issues,I have indeed known one or two and dropped them like a ton weight once their true character had revealed itself,life is short,you obviously have doubts as your airing them on a public forum,move on my friend while theres still time,I would never try and swim through lifes pool with a heavy stone tied around my neck