How do you balance your holiday in Phils

[flomike]

Everytime we go home to Phils I am having a hard time to balance visiting my family. We usually stay either in Manila or Makati hotel then almost everyday travelling to Laguna (San Pedro) its really a nightmare. Spending almost half day sitting in a traffic then need to go back again about 8 in the evening at the hotel, its so tiring I can't bring my parents to the hotel with us bec my mother is dependent on oxygen and my father don't like aircon.

This coming Dec we're going back after 2 years and I have a plan to rent a condo for a week atleast 2 bedroom so my father can stay with us (my mother is not with us anymore) then my siblings can visit us there anytime or stay for a night. My siblings lives in diff places, I am not prepared to visit them coz its time consuming.

Me and my husband usually have atleast 2 weeks to go around and enjoy our holiday together. Ofcourse, sometimes I feel guilty that I don't spend much time with family the fact that I don't see them every 2 years. I think the only advantage I've got is I have no relatives to visit except my family and my siblings usually working on week days so I'll try to leave the weekends free so we can see each other and treat them for a dine out and their kids.

I can't wait to go home and we are going to Bohol for a week and some places near Manila.

[Mrs Daddy]

Its cheaper if you go to America.You can do whatever you want and its nearer.

yezzzz that`s what ate ping told me today btw thanks very much for such a very warm welcome and very lovely food ate ping and Boss keith.Am getting too fat now food, food, food how can I resist

[IainBusby]

Hi Iain,
wow feel for you on that one mate, If Louella can get the time off why don't you do what we did. We both go for three weeks (2 weeks in Palawan at our place just us) then we all move to Pangasinan to the farm with her family and neighbours/friends. I stay one week and then leave Joshua and Ligaya for four more weeks. We did this in winter so they got seven weeks off the dark cold wet days. I am a little luckier than many guys as Ligaya had spent many years kliving away from home in Singapore and Hong Kong and is not quite so attached to home, in fact she likes to spend time with our friends in Hong Kong on the way there and back just as much.

good luck with finding a compromise

Although I have 5 weeks holidays, plus bank holidays a year , unfotunately it's a bit awkward fo me to take more than 2 weeks off in one stretch. I work in a small IT team, just 3 of us and the boss and having longer than this is a bit frowned upon and is allowed by all round agreement only. This is why having an enjoyable main annual holiday is so important to me.

I usually manage to work it so that I can have a day off on flexitme at the beginning of my holiday and stretch it out by a day or so at the end to allow for the travelling, but that's it really. The only time I managed more than this is when I went to Phils for a month to get married.

Iain.

[fred]

Iain if I were you Id just forget about coming here for a quiet holiday..Even if you persuade her to do it your way she will give you constant grief knowing that her family are so close but yet so very far away..
Most filipino`s idea of vacation/holiday is nothing like ours and most of them simply don't go on holiday unless its to visit relatives,eat and drink a lot and blow their cash.(so that the neighbours can see)
The Philippine holiday experience is for young single people ...
not for those married to a Filipino.
Go to Spain nalang!!
Viva Espana.

[Florge]

I'm afraid that finacially that sort of thing is out of the question at the moment, It's going to be a struggle to afford a decent holiday just for my wife, step-daughter and myself as come September we will be applying for citizenship for them both which is probably going to cost about £1200.

To be honest, the fact it's going to be a struggle finacially is another good reason for going somewhere else, because as is usually the case, so much is expected by so many when we go there.

Iain.

Better to tell her about it... I know she'll understand why there would be a slight change of your Pinas visit...

[maria_and_matt]

Iain if I were you Id just forget about coming here for a quiet holiday..Even if you persuade her to do it your way she will give you constant grief knowing that her family are so close but yet so very far away..
Most filipino`s idea of vacation/holiday is nothing like ours and most of them simply don't go on holiday unless its to visit relatives,eat and drink a lot and blow their cash.(so that the neighbours can see)
The Philippine holiday experience is for young single people ...
not for those married to a Filipino.
Go to Spain nalang!!
Viva Espana.

who cares about the neigbours? is that how u see us filipinas when we go back home? out to impress neighbours???

and of course when we go backhome we want to see family, andyes we want to eat food that we have not eaten in probably a year..

[pennybarry]

Iain if I were you Id just forget about coming here for a quiet holiday..Even if you persuade her to do it your way she will give you constant grief knowing that her family are so close but yet so very far away..
Most filipino`s idea of vacation/holiday is nothing like ours and most of them simply don't go on holiday unless its to visit relatives,eat and drink a lot and blow their cash.(so that the neighbours can see)
The Philippine holiday experience is for young single people ...
not for those married to a Filipino.
Go to Spain nalang!!
Viva Espana.

who cares about the neigbours? is that how u see us filipinas when we go back home? out to impress neighbours???

and of course when we go backhome we want to see family, andyes we want to eat food that we have not eaten in probably a year..

Ahahahah I cannot impress my neighbors as my house is surrounded by big houses. Three storey houses with swimming pool.Mine is the smallest and I'm the poorest

I said I envy you neighbors! I can't reach you!!! They said if you build yours, it maybe 4 storeys 2 hopes. No hope and Bob Hope

The real reason is only one. To visit my family and friends.

[vbkelly]

I was just wondering how the other members on here manage to balance their Philippines holidays between visiting family and having a really good, get away from it all, stress free, unwinding holiday.

We're thinking of going to Phils again this year but we always end up arguing about it, because I told my wife that I don't want to go to CDO, where her folks live. I said I don't mind going there for a couple of days at the end of the holiday just to visit and see them.

This is because everytime I have been to Phils it's been the same routine, go to CDO and stay in a hotel in town, then visit her folks up in Bukidnon every couple of days, take the family out for meals in CDO etc and visit her other relatives away out in Balingasag about an hour and a half away from CDO.

The last time we were there we did manage to visit Duka Bay resort for a couple of days, but mostly it's just the same routine. My wife says I'm being selfish because I don't want to visit her family but it's not that, I would just like to have a really nice holiday in a resort hotel with a swimming pool and a beach nearby, somewhere like Bohol for instance.

Do you think I'm being mean or unfair in wanting this?

Iain.

i do feel its a bit unfair of you for to expect louella and mary to travel 3/4 quarter around the world to go on holiday and not spend sometime with YOUR other family being married to pinay lady you have to take the rough with the smooth unfortunately.

[Ana_may365]

everytime we go on our holiday[phils]we go first in pattaya,thailand to visit our friends there for 1 week.go to kohsamui for another 1 week and bangkok for 1 week.move to cambodia for 1 week and then go to phils for 3 weeks.at that time we enjoy our holidays first b4 we go to phils to be with my children.we book them for 4 days in our hotel were we stay,me and hubby eat together with them,go malling with them,swimming with them and then fetch them back home in cavite while i leave my hubby for 1 day so that i can make chika to all my friends in our place[a little bit handaan]and then back to england.this is our routine everytime we go to our holidays,enjoy our self first[spclly hubby]sometimes we go for 8 to 10 weeks holiday.

[nigel]

This has been interesting to me, I like to read about this sort of thing..

[tiN]

Well everytime we go to hoilday in PI for example for a month, hubby will send me home first for 2 weeks to spend time with my family, then after that he will follow me and go somewhere else, where can we both relax and enjoy.

[charlwill]

When we go for holiday in Phils. I have plenty of time to spend with my siblings because we stayed there for 6 months. I have plenty of time as well, for all my relatives and friends. Oh yes, we visited some places as well, like Siquijor, Cebu, Dumaguete and alot more. So, in that 6 months I enjoyed with my families and friends and we had a great time as well in some places just the 2 of us. So, we have a well spent holiday.

[IainBusby]

i do feel its a bit unfair of you for to expect louella and mary to travel 3/4 quarter around the world to go on holiday and not spend sometime with YOUR other family being married to pinay lady you have to take the rough with the smooth unfortunately.

I've been there and done that 3 times already, but this time I'd really like to do something different as the only part of Phils that I've seen is CDO. Then I won't really mind if we do that same routine again the next three times we go to Phils, so I think I am being more than fair.

Iain.

[IainBusby]

everytime we go on our holiday[phils]we go first in pattaya,thailand to visit our friends there for 1 week.go to kohsamui for another 1 week and bangkok for 1 week.move to cambodia for 1 week and then go to phils for 3 weeks.at that time we enjoy our holidays first b4 we go to phils to be with my children.we book them for 4 days in our hotel were we stay,me and hubby eat together with them,go malling with them,swimming with them and then fetch them back home in cavite while i leave my hubby for 1 day so that i can make chika to all my friends in our place[a little bit handaan]and then back to england.this is our routine everytime we go to our holidays,enjoy our self first[spclly hubby]sometimes we go for 8 to 10 weeks holiday.

That's 6 weeks in total and if I could get 6 weeks off and could afford to go away on holiday for 6 weeks, then I wouldn't mind doing something like that, in fact I'm sure it would be fantastic. But unfotunately were not in that position with regard to time off work or financially.

Iain.

[aposhark]

Hi Iain,

I think it is admirable and good to take your family to the Philippines again.

I would ask your wife it is alright for you to spend some time together also.
She can spend some time with her family with you, but equally spend time in her "new" family.

We don't get much time off and we all need to relax and recharge our batteries. Spending too much time with her family is not completely recharging your batteries as it can be a little bit stressful with the "in-laws".

I hope she can see it this way.

[aposhark]

Well everytime we go to hoilday in PI for example for a month, hubby will send me home first for 2 weeks to spend time with my family, then after that he will follow me and go somewhere else, where can we both relax and enjoy.

This is a great idea.

[maria_and_matt]

i truly hope that my head wont get chopped off as to what i am about to say,, for us filipina wives, our husbands work their ass off all year long for us, to give us a nice comfy life, it is kinda like the british way to get away from it all (stress of work) once a year. it really would not hurt us to also give back a little of what they give us, that is love and understanding. if we look at it our hubbys put up a lot married to us. being married to a pinay comes with an awful lot of baggage ie our family back home. they put up with us helping our families, our moods and the rest.
i guess what i am saying is when we are on holiday with them, we should also listen to what they want.
and with that i say please please it is only my opinion dont kill me

[Alec&Davina]

i truly hope that my head wont get chopped off as to what i am about to say,, for us filipina wives, our husbands work their ass off all year long for us, to give us a nice comfy life, it is kinda like the british way to get away from it all (stress of work) once a year. it really would not hurt us to also give back a little of what they give us, that is love and understanding. if we look at it our hubbys put up a lot married to us. being married to a pinay comes with an awful lot of baggage ie our family back home. they put up with us helping our families, our moods and the rest.
i guess what i am saying is when we are on holiday with them, we should also listen to what they want.
and with that i say please please it is only my opinion dont kill me

i agree with u Maria, I think it will be better Iain if u talk to ur wife and as much as possible discuss how many days or weeks u will stay with her family and friends and then how many days for u together so u can go around the PHilippines. Its just a matter of compromise and understanding.

[vbkelly]

if you plan going to PI try to see louella's family for 2 or 3 days then go ahead to camiguin, bohol or any surrounding island there so you can explore phils

[tiN]

This is a great idea.

It works

[IainBusby]

if you plan going to PI try to see louella's family for 2 or 3 days then go ahead to camiguin, bohol or any surrounding island there so you can explore phils

That's just what I suggested, but at the end of the holiday before we head off back to the UK.

[IainBusby]

i truly hope that my head wont get chopped off as to what i am about to say,, for us filipina wives, our husbands work their ass off all year long for us, to give us a nice comfy life, it is kinda like the british way to get away from it all (stress of work) once a year. it really would not hurt us to also give back a little of what they give us, that is love and understanding. if we look at it our hubbys put up a lot married to us. being married to a pinay comes with an awful lot of baggage ie our family back home. they put up with us helping our families, our moods and the rest.
i guess what i am saying is when we are on holiday with them, we should also listen to what they want.
and with that i say please please it is only my opinion dont kill me

Thanks for that Maria, Now if only I could bring my wife round to your way of thinking, I'm sure we could work something out.

Iain.

[adam&chryss]

i truly hope that my head wont get chopped off as to what i am about to say,, for us filipina wives, our husbands work their ass off all year long for us, to give us a nice comfy life, it is kinda like the british way to get away from it all (stress of work) once a year. it really would not hurt us to also give back a little of what they give us, that is love and understanding. if we look at it our hubbys put up a lot married to us. being married to a pinay comes with an awful lot of baggage ie our family back home. they put up with us helping our families, our moods and the rest.
i guess what i am saying is when we are on holiday with them, we should also listen to what they want.
and with that i say please please it is only my opinion dont kill me

No one would kill you for saying something as sensible and understanding as that.
You hit the nail truly on the head.

[Tawi2]

Best and most sensible post on the thread

[maria_and_matt]

Best and most sensible post on the thread

awwww tawi2 whereve u been... we have missed u here kiss on ur forehead muah welcome back!

[Tawi2]

Kiss on my forehead My lola used to do that,AND say exactly the same thing "Awwww,where have you been"

[fred]

That's 6 weeks in total and if I could get 6 weeks off and could afford to go away on holiday for 6 weeks, then I wouldn't mind doing something like that, in fact I'm sure it would be fantastic. But unfotunately were not in that position with regard to time off work or financially.

Iain.

Get her to fore go her duvet days says for one year and take a 2 week sicky instead.

[bornatbirth]

whenever i have been and stayed with my wife we do tend to spend most of our time with her family and usually go and do the same things but i enjoy being with them malling and eating,also they are not dependent on me with money so we never have that as a issue.

apart from a few days we dont get much time to ourselfs but knowing my wife can treat them and do her bit looking after her family makes her happy,so how can i deny her this?

when i know how hard it can be in over there for some and i also knew when i married her what i was getting into!

i dont see nothing wrong with what your saying why not let your wife stay there for a few weeks by herself after a short trip just for you and her?

[islander]

When me & my hubby visited Phils. last March, I really find it hard to balance my time with my husband, family & friends, so I ended up not really enjoying the most of it, also considering that we've only spent 20days there.

I alternate sleeping in hotel where my husband stayed & then sleeping also at home, very inconvenient for me though but it's ok as long as I have divided my time equally among them, hehehe!

But inspite of that, I'm still happy to be with my family & friends even just in the short period of time. That's the most important thing I think!

[aphrodite78]

hi iain,

why don't you talk to your wife and explain it's not the quantity but it's the quality that matters. when we have a holiday to the phils we usually go for 3 weeks we spend 7 days in bohol without my family knowing that we were already there and then fly to manila (etc) for 2 weeks stay which includes visiting my family, dining out with them, dining out, shopping, shopping, visiting my old folks and then more eating again. it's not being selfish iain but you both need to re-charge and i am a filipina as well i know that we have a very strong bond with our relatives. by the time we see them we have already have our 7 days r & r and we enjoy it more because we in some way we have already re-charged our batteries. i hope i didn't offend your wife or anybody here in the forum as i know some may or may not agree with me but i am just citing my situation.