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  1. #1
    Respected Member Piamed's Avatar
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    What do you do?

    Hmmn! We're in the Hilton Hotel at Canada Wharf and I've just taken Pia's temperature - it's 37.9 C. Higher than normal but at least it's down from the 39.2 C it was a couple of hours ago. It seems that Pia got ill during the journey down here - 5 hours including the stop middway. its almost midnight and i'm recently back from the 2 hour walk I took Marikit on around the docks so that she would stop screaming (teething) and Pia could get some much needed rest. I've got to try to prepare for the next 2 days presentations now.

    I deally, given my need to do some work, I'd have come down alone but have not done so for several reasons. Of course I miss them but the main reason is that I don't feel comfortable leaving Pia and Marikit alone in Leeds where they dont really have the support systems needed while I'm away. Especially with Pia being alone with Marikit since she has been a very demanding baby thus far.

    Do any of you live very far away from family and close friends and how do you ensure that your chesrished one is not loney and stressed, especially with a young baby?
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  2. #2
    Respected Member bornatbirth's Avatar
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    my wife is only alone when i go to work,i have a brother whos 10 mins away who lives with his gf and her family are always close too.

    i guess with your job working away from home alot will have its problems dont you have anyone nearby you?

    is the baby wearing you 2 out!
    i have learnt to do what my wife says!


  3. #3
    Respected Member gracia143's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Piamed View Post
    Hmmn! We're in the Hilton Hotel at Canada Wharf and I've just taken Pia's temperature - it's 37.9 C. Higher than normal but at least it's down from the 39.2 C it was a couple of hours ago. It seems that Pia got ill during the journey down here - 5 hours including the stop middway. its almost midnight and i'm recently back from the 2 hour walk I took Marikit on around the docks so that she would stop screaming (teething) and Pia could get some much needed rest. I've got to try to prepare for the next 2 days presentations now.

    I deally, given my need to do some work, I'd have come down alone but have not done so for several reasons. Of course I miss them but the main reason is that I don't feel comfortable leaving Pia and Marikit alone in Leeds where they dont really have the support systems needed while I'm away. Especially with Pia being alone with Marikit since she has been a very demanding baby thus far.

    Do any of you live very far away from family and close friends and how do you ensure that your chesrished one is not loney and stressed, especially with a young baby?
    Sorry to hear that Pia is not feeling well, she might just be tired of the travel. It's good though that you've taken her and the baby with you, at least you can look after her.

    I understand your worries, I'm sure it isn't so easy being away from family and friends whilst having a baby, back home there will be Nanay or Tita to help her look after the young one.

    There are a number of Filipina living in Leeds, I have one good friend who lives there too. I hope one day Pia will be able to make new friends so she will have a 'support system' whilst living in this country. It helps a lot.
    The bravest thing that men do is love women--Mort Sahl


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    My hubby is always away also, sometimes for a week or even months... the good thing though his mum and dad is only 3 mins walk as well as his sister.. so everytime he's away i can just only walk to them if i wanted company.
    It's good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good to check up once in a while to make sure you haven't lost the things that money can't buy.


  5. #5
    Respected Member Piamed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bornatbirth View Post
    my wife is only alone when i go to work,i have a brother whos 10 mins away who lives with his gf and her family are always close too.

    i guess with your job working away from home alot will have its problems dont you have anyone nearby you?

    is the baby wearing you 2 out!
    Hi Mate, I'll answer the second question first. We are up giving her her second feed since I posted at midnight - it's now 4:21 and Marikit has been tossing and turning for the last 30 mins or so before i woke Pia up.

    ----- 13 mins later ----

    Pia fell asleep (she does this so easily I envy her ) while I winded Marikit (and cleared up all the regurgitated milk on my t-shirt as well as the floor). I've also changed her nappy, applied Bonjela to her gums and Aveeno to her face and neck. A man's work is never done!

    Signing off as I've still got to prepare for today's meeting and leave the hotel at 7am.

    We have actually made several friends in Leeds but they are all about 40 mins drive and none of the Filipina drive. Plus, they all work.

    Quote Originally Posted by gracia143 View Post
    Sorry to hear that Pia is not feeling well, she might just be tired of the travel. It's good though that you've taken her and the baby with you, at least you can look after her.

    I understand your worries, I'm sure it isn't so easy being away from family and friends whilst having a baby, back home there will be Nanay or Tita to help her look after the young one.

    There are a number of Filipina living in Leeds, I have one good friend who lives there too. I hope one day Pia will be able to make new friends so she will have a 'support system' whilst living in this country. It helps a lot.
    I think that although Pia sleeps so easily she is run down. Certainly things would be different in da Phils. As Pia told me earlier when I asked whether she thinks its better for them to stay home, she is not comfortable being home with Marikit alone because of the way she is so much of the time - screaming, crying, not sleeping, irritable. It's hard enough finding time to even shower even with me there it's all hands on deck pretty much 24/7.

    Since i've put Marikit to bed she is kicking, snorting, wriggling, etc. She is clearly uncomfortable for some unknown rason. We have some good days where she will sleep well for 3 hours plus but they are rare. Pia's still asleep but i'll have to pick her up soon.

    The people at the baby clinic say Marikit is doing well and she will settle soon. How long is soon?

    Quote Originally Posted by tiN View Post
    ,
    My hubby is always away also, sometimes for a week or even months... the good thing though his mum and dad is only 3 mins walk as well as his sister.. so everytime he's away i can just only walk to them if i wanted company.
    That's nice to have. Even then several months apart must be so hard.

    Ok, 04:52. I'll set the alarm for 6am. I'm too tired to try to work now so will just have to try to get to our office earlier to prepare. If not, yet again I'll have to wing it. Wish me luck, it's gonna be a particularly tough week.

    It's not the most frugal thing to do during an economic downturn but we may have to pay someone to come and help out during the day a couple of days a week so that Pia can express some milk for them to feed Marikit while she takes a break or gets the many things she wants to get done (such as ironing, sewing,tidying up, etc.). when I'm home it will also enable me to get on with my work.

    I had my mid-year review last week. First time in my career I received several 2's out of 5 on my performance scorecard.

    Night night!!!!!!!!
    Be responsible with little so that you can be trusted with much!!
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  6. #6
    Respected Member dontpushme's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Piamed View Post
    I had my mid-year review last week. First time in my career I received several 2's out of 5 on my performance scorecard.
    Ouch! It sounds like things are starting to get overwhelming. I hope you can get her mom over to help. Your mother-in-law will definitely be a big help, especially if she likes to fuss over everyone and be everyone's mom (which is quite common among Filipinas in situations where TLC is needed). In the meantime, good luck mending your performance ratings!


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    Can you fly in Pia's mom or sister for the meantime to stay with her?


  8. #8
    Respected Member Piamed's Avatar
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    Hi amiga. We are looking at getting her mum over for 6 months if poss.
    Be responsible with little so that you can be trusted with much!!
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  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Piamed View Post
    Hi amiga. We are looking at getting her mum over for 6 months if poss.
    That's wonderful! It will be possible...


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    Hi Piamed,

    I think these times for you will be the hardest But I would suggest constant phone calls to let your wife know how you feel.. And as for having her mother over for 6 months



  11. #11
    Respected Member Piamed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Florge View Post
    That's wonderful! It will be possible...
    Amen and Amen!

    Quote Originally Posted by Northerner View Post
    Hi Piamed,

    I think these times for you will be the hardest But I would suggest constant phone calls to let your wife know how you feel.. And as for having her mother over for 6 months

    I agree totally my friend.
    Be responsible with little so that you can be trusted with much!!
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  12. #12
    Respected Member Ann07's Avatar
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    Hi Amigo

    Hope Pia will be better soon. Nice that you take them with you for a change. Must be so hard for Pia everytime when you are away. Its really tough in having kid/s.

    RObert is the same especially when he works nightshift. Lucky if he gets 5 hrs straight. He has to look after james before going to work and when he comes home. Plus james is badly teething too he wokes up in the middle of the night and Robert has to settle him back to sleep. And I've got John and james when Robert is at work poor me one in each arms Everytime i need a kip I cannot coz when the kids asleep thats the only time we can do some house chores and cooking

    Life is not the same when you have kids but it will pass hopefully

    Goodluck to your presentation.
    Love and kisses to the girls
    LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL


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