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Thread: Just married! My wife is very ill

  1. #1
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    Just married! My wife is very ill

    I was married in the Phil at the end of June. Around about the day I left to come back to the US my new bride developed a cough that didnt go away. It got steadily worse and she began spitting up blood. She went to the hospital and the x-ray shows a suspicious growth. She then went to a private hospital where the doctor has suggested that she travel to another, larger town to a hospital for a CT-scan and other tests. She has not yet done this.
    I am really out of my element on this as I dont know how hospitals work there.
    If she were here she would have my health insurance.
    Help! I dont know what to do. The last hospital bill she had I refused to send money to her father via Western Union. Its not that I dont trust her family its that I need to learn to trust her family. The hospital wouldnt release her without payment, so she then in turn pawned the wedding ring. I want to do the right thing and get her the best care we can get. On the other hand at the same time, I`m now not working much and the wedding etc has taken a lot of my reserve cash. Truth is I dont want to send money to her family for this, but prefer to pay any doctors or hospitals directly. I have no idea about how to go about this or what I should be doing. I dont know about how hospital bills are paid there or what if any services might be available. Again, I do not wish to give the money directly to her family.
    Thanks in advance for any help or advice.


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    Quote Originally Posted by USA View Post
    I was married in the Phil at the end of June. Around about the day I left to come back to the US my new bride developed a cough that didnt go away. It got steadily worse and she began spitting up blood. She went to the hospital and the x-ray shows a suspicious growth. She then went to a private hospital where the doctor has suggested that she travel to another, larger town to a hospital for a CT-scan and other tests. She has not yet done this.
    I am really out of my element on this as I dont know how hospitals work there.
    If she were here she would have my health insurance.
    Help! I dont know what to do. The last hospital bill she had I refused to send money to her father via Western Union. Its not that I dont trust her family its that I need to learn to trust her family. The hospital wouldnt release her without payment, so she then in turn pawned the wedding ring. I want to do the right thing and get her the best care we can get. On the other hand at the same time, I`m now not working much and the wedding etc has taken a lot of my reserve cash. Truth is I dont want to send money to her family for this, but prefer to pay any doctors or hospitals directly. I have no idea about how to go about this or what I should be doing. I dont know about how hospital bills are paid there or what if any services might be available. Again, I do not wish to give the money directly to her family.
    Thanks in advance for any help or advice.
    Hello.....i consider this as an emergency and you have to get your wife checked and tested as soon as possible.....
    If she is spitting blood, then i suppose it's a serious one and you should send her the money she needs for the hospitalization....
    Does she have a personal bank account that you can just deposit the money there and she can ask somebody to withdraw from her atm???....
    Is her family that bad and suspicious?? would they spend the money you will send for your wife's treatment somewhere else?????
    Are they that terrible??? Were talking about a very sick and very ill family member here.....
    She has to pawn the wedding ring just to pay for the previous hospital bill......she seriously needs financial help and medical attention....
    "10% of life is made up of what happens to you, 90% is decided by how you react"
    "The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost"


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    I am deeply sorry to hear about your wife's health problem at the moment.
    And sincerely hope that it will not be as serious as it sounds.
    Spitting blood could be also down to TB, and it is, as far as I am aware, treatable.

    As per paying the hospital bills, I am afraid I haven't a clue to which way is best.
    I understand your reluctance to send any money to the family, but I reckon that it is the only option open at the moment.
    The problem in Phil is that everything is paid upfront...
    You have to pay for the prescription, take it to the chemist/pharmacist and pay for it... Then take said medicines to the doctor for him/her to administer.

    And Phil hospitals are known in not releasing the patient, until the bill is paid up.


    Ideally you should try to email the hospital admin by email with the relevant details at hand and offer to send the money directly to them, or the cash to your good lady.

    www.xoom.com is very good and reliable, they can pay your deposit to an existing bank account, or better they can deliver the cash directly to the person in question, provided some ID is present.

    Try xoom. I been using it for a few years, and haven't had any problems with it. And if you already have a paypal account, it will be easier to set up, as they will take the funds from paypal. and paypal gets them off your bank account.

    Good luck, and all the best to your wife and yourself.


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    Respected Member vbkelly's Avatar
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    hi usa sorry to hear about your wife, if she's in the private hospital and if she's better now and she wanted to go out you must pay her bills straight away before they charge her every single day stay in the hospital and the more she stay there the bills goes up like heaven.
    all things are possible!


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    Respected Member MarBell379's Avatar
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    If my fiancee were in the same position, I would have absolutely NO hesitation in sending money to her family to pay for her, but if she is out of hospital its easy to send money to her directly.
    There is one person in her family I wouldnt trust, but other than that I wouldnt have a major issue.

    I would also send money to get the blody wedding ring back as thats an issue that could cause serious friction even in the best of circumstances!


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    Respected Member maria_and_matt's Avatar
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    Sending money to her family is your only option for now, but before you send any money ask them to scan an official bill from the hospital and email it you. That way you know that you are only sending them the exact amount.
    God grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change, the courage to change the things i can and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people i had to kill because they pissed me off.


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    Respected Member Tawi2's Avatar
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    Hope your wifes health worries arent serious,though spitting blood in Pinas is often indicative of TB,but thats a worst case scenario.If it was my wife I would be at the airport waiting to board but everyones situation is different,giving money to a family member to pay hospital bills?My friend did it with his mother in law when his child was born,she vanished for several days and turned up looking sheepish having lost the lot in a Mahjong game rather than pay her grandchilds hospital bill Ask your wife to speak to the hospital regarding payment made direct to them,all problems like this have a solution,hope your resolve this conundrum satisfactorily



    Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
    The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.


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    Respected Member britishdetained's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by USA View Post
    I was married in the Phil at the end of June. Around about the day I left to come back to the US my new bride developed a cough that didnt go away. It got steadily worse and she began spitting up blood. She went to the hospital and the x-ray shows a suspicious growth. She then went to a private hospital where the doctor has suggested that she travel to another, larger town to a hospital for a CT-scan and other tests. She has not yet done this.
    I am really out of my element on this as I dont know how hospitals work there.
    If she were here she would have my health insurance.
    Help! I dont know what to do. The last hospital bill she had I refused to send money to her father via Western Union. Its not that I dont trust her family its that I need to learn to trust her family. The hospital wouldnt release her without payment, so she then in turn pawned the wedding ring. I want to do the right thing and get her the best care we can get. On the other hand at the same time, I`m now not working much and the wedding etc has taken a lot of my reserve cash. Truth is I dont want to send money to her family for this, but prefer to pay any doctors or hospitals directly. I have no idea about how to go about this or what I should be doing. I dont know about how hospital bills are paid there or what if any services might be available. Again, I do not wish to give the money directly to her family.
    Thanks in advance for any help or advice.
    Hi sorry to hear about your wife. If she is spitting blood then it must be something like TB, my husband was diagnosed with accute tuberculosis and I have spent around 20,000ph for the first treatment and the laboratories.

    If you are an american citizen you may contact the US embassy and you can send the money through them as they have special consular staff that can check on her and do the payment in your behalf. If you are a British Citizen you can contact Mr. Carlos Tampinco-pro consul, he can also check on her and do the payment for you.
    There once was a girl that believed in mankind, that there was still honor and chivalry that existed in everyone of us. She also believed that everyone deserves a chance to prove oneself individually and hoped that the courtesy would be returned. That girl is dead now, and all that is left is her shadow. To give one a chance to prove thyself is a chance for you to become dwindled in the dissappointment.


  9. #9
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    which hospital is she at?


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    I`ll try to answer some of the questions etc. I have an issue with ZOOM so I cant use it now. They say they delivered the money but didnt receive theirs from me, so I havent used it in months. I wish I knew of another cheap service like it.

    2 doctors say that they are sure its not TB.(how they can be so sure I dont know being that they havent yet given her a TB test...but OK) I talked to the second doctor he says the X-ray shows a suspicious growth. Shes 19 years old.
    She isnt in the hospital now, she got out day before yesterday. This doctor has suggested German Hospital in Cagayan de Oro for CT-scan and other tests.
    So she has to travel to do that...
    Its not that I dont trust my wife. Well I have known her over a year. The family I trust some what. But when it comes down to it, I also realize that I really dont know these people very well. Her older sister is playing an American guy on the internet. She mentions the child to him but doesnt mention the father still lives with her. The whole family knows whats up with that...nobody makes a fuss over it Ive noticed. She gets Western Union from the guy, I guess hes coming for a visit. Thats no big deal it seems, nobody is kicking her out of the house. Or the BF.
    I first heard my wife was in a hospital by txt from her sister (my wife couldnt get thru to me on her phone at the time) but no hospital name, # etc. I had to txt her back to get that. Then i couldnt get an answer 615-640. Then when someone picked up it was 2 people doing the humpty hump, very clearly. They didnt say anything. It sounded live and not recorded, I dont know. I called back and no answer again for the next 45 minutes until someone picked up. Sounded like a hospital, I asked for my wife and the lady put her on the line. If I hadnt found the # of this place on the internet I never would have believed that it was really a hospital. Then next day she wants me to send her Western Union in her Dads name to get her out of there. I declined to do so, but as I say I want to try to help, but I want to deal directly with the hospital and not just send money in the amount the bill is relayed to me by phone or internet by them.
    I will try calling to make arrangements with the next hospital beforehand but I can see I`m really out of my element in dealing with the Filipino medical system. In the US detaining someone for an unpaid medical bill is false imprisonment. A major crime and a major lawsuit too. I investigated it, its against the law there also, but not for private hospitals!
    I`m really way out of my element here.
    Thanks for everyone`s help


  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by britishdetained View Post
    If you are an american citizen you may contact the US embassy and you can send the money through them as they have special consular staff that can check on her and do the payment in your behalf. If you are a British Citizen you can contact Mr. Carlos Tampinco-pro consul, he can also check on her and do the payment for you.

    Im an American citizen. My embassy will do that for me? I had never thought of that. I`ll have to check into that?
    I did however wonder that if the condition were serious, if I might somehow obtain some sort of special visa for here to come here. I have health insurance, but that doesnt do her any good there.


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    Respected Member Tawi2's Avatar
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    Hope you solve your predicament,I really do,there was a case over here several years ago,I remember it clearly as it was broadcast on the evening news,british guy had gone on vacation with his wife to pinas,he didnt have insurance I remember he either fell ill or had an accident,end result he was hospitalised with a goodly sized bill,they wouldnt let him out till he had paid the cash They play by a different set of rules over there.



    Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
    The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.


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    Respected Member britishdetained's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by USA View Post
    Im an American citizen. My embassy will do that for me? I had never thought of that. I`ll have to check into that?
    I did however wonder that if the condition were serious, if I might somehow obtain some sort of special visa for here to come here. I have health insurance, but that doesnt do her any good there.
    its better if you send it through your embassy if you really do not want sending money through her family. US embassy has a consular service in Cebu you can contact them and they will send a representative to where your wife is. You can get her an emergency visa through your embassy. but remember that you must get her medical records and submit it to the embassy same as you need to get her a doctor base in the US and a hospital where she can have the treatment. An emergency visa will be granted to her soon as you able to provide the necessary documents.

    Have you already registered your marriage at the embassy? if you did that is better as they will put it an an emergency case, she will get visa in two weeks
    There once was a girl that believed in mankind, that there was still honor and chivalry that existed in everyone of us. She also believed that everyone deserves a chance to prove oneself individually and hoped that the courtesy would be returned. That girl is dead now, and all that is left is her shadow. To give one a chance to prove thyself is a chance for you to become dwindled in the dissappointment.


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    I would advise caution - after my experience - an attempted scam for a hospital bill - conclusively proven, now - precisely 3 years after it happened.
    All the advice mentioned above were taken - and it was still a scam.
    The repercussions are still reverberating around the Internet - virtually everyone was covering for the girl, concealing the truth - to protect the interests of a real estate company - possibly more - I tried to get assistance from the Embassy & the gentleman mentioned - and the story that I was being sold was simply re-affirmed.
    Caution.


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