READ READ AND READ AGAIN http://www.british-filipino.com/
READ READ AND READ AGAIN http://www.british-filipino.com/
You're an adult aren't youIt's not like there's set figures or anything
On a personal level I'd be insulted if dontpushme asked me to send money back to the Philippines, but I guess I'm pretty lucky because she'd never ask me in the first place, (not that I have any to send)
If you're absolutely intent on sending money back, why not tell your other half that you'll match whatever she sends back? Sounds fair, no?
But I definitely wouldn't feel obliged to send anything back, like Win2Win (I believe) mentioned, they coped before you came along, they can cope when you're there
Guess its the way I've entered the relationship. If she were to suddenly turn around and say "yeah send £x back to the Philippines every month". Why should I? Would she stop loving me if I didn't? Would she resent me?
I've never sent money to any girlfriends families in the UK, so to me it's not completely natural. If part of the reason a girl wants to marry me is because I have the £££ to support her family then I think I have every right to feel insulted.
well at least she knows where you stand on sending money then
but what would happen if she needed it for an emergency, or she lost her job, was at uni studying, her family were poor, you still wouldn't help
it all depends on circumstances. and if you can afford to help, but insulted is a strong word to use..
if your parents didn't have much would you help them out ? or let them struggle ??
Dont feel insulted Matt,its asian culture,totally different from ours,though this system of dependancy looks set to continue for a long time in the future as pinas has a 3% population growth and is reliant on foreign remittancesAlso remember we all live according to our means,we adjust to whatever we have in our accounts or the salary we are earning,the more you send the more they spend
![]()
Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.
Dili ko kuripot Pen,but Asian culture and Western culture are often like oil and water,they dont mix well![]()
Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.
It's not really though, I want a girl to be in a relationship with me for the right reasons. If she has ulterior motives then I'd feel insulted by them
Obviously there are extenuating circumstances. If the girls family lived in abject poverty then I'd want to help, but if I was sending hard earned cash back to fund lavish spending when the family was already comfortable then its absolute nonsense.
Luckily this is all hypothetical
*edit - Can I just add its not my intention to offend anyone here, perhaps I'm just a little naive. But I get annoyed at the times people are somewhat "expected" to fund other peoples lifestyles, taxpayers fund enough lifestyles in the UK, but thats a different beast. I am more that willing to admit many people in the Philippines do need some kind of assistance though, especially considering there is no Welfare (I think I'm right with that? Or maybe just a little misinformed).
exactly matt your g/f is one of the lucky ones then
but many are not so lucky, and everyday is a struggle, my misses didn't have inet when i first chatted to her, as a student living 100s of miles from home, she had no money, i could sayor i could help. most the money i sent went to the misses not to buy things she didn't need but to pay the bills, uni fees etc, and now much of it goes to pay for her son to get thru uni, no one is having an easy time or buying plasma tv's with the money we send.
. there is helping and repaying debts owed and their is taking the
![]()
its a shame that some foreginers cant just come down to there level no offence intended herethere are some very nice and sometimes very clever people that just have not had a chance to improve there pitifull lives over there ,and i take my hat off to the under classes in the philippines because they do try unlike some of our own
![]()
I was speaking with a friend about this yesterday. He is of Indian origin and his wife is from IndiaSo he will often send money back to help his wifes family as from time to time they will need it, but then they are not living in dire straits (doctors in the family)... But like we all have hard times, his in-laws could face a choice between starvation for a few days or paying the bills
Not the kind of situation we in the west tend to face too often.
And so the family, and extended family all pull together to support one another
Personally, I think if you marry into an Asian family who have a similar sort of bond then you really should expect a few calls for money every so often. But it seems the obvious thing on this forum is that people do not like to send money to fund drink habits or whatever vices some inlaws may have.
I know my mahal was funded through college by an aunt in the USA, so I expect to be "Paying it forward" in the future, and that does not bother me. So long as the family unit here in the UK comes first, then all should be fine.
![]()
There are currently 2 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 2 guests)