How much ££ for the family

[Tawi2]

Dontpushme,I speak a little of the language,visayan and tagalog,just enough to understand and your right,they do backbite kids who marry old western guys,but the same women who gossip wouldnt stop their daughters marrying westerners I am sure,as their tsismis is jealousy related I liked your hypothesis that pinays with money would avoid me,yet those without would marry me Totally wrong My sons mum's family have a beach resort,Korean language school(used to be their hotel),and a four story house with swimming pool on the roof,I was there earlier this year when a politician landed his helicopter on the beach to visit the uncle who has a lot of influence.My current lady friend?Lets just say I always liked brains coupled with beauty,she has a very good job with World Bank and also does consultancy projects,worked with GMA before Gloria became president,assumptions are often wrong,its nothing whatsoever to do with money,its a little concept called love,as for gaping age gap I am the right side of 50 and wouldnt countenance a woman more than 5 years younger I am attracted to women with a surfeit of brains to compensate my deficit,but pinas does have a dependency culture,thats documented fact and having been there 50-60 times and lived in different social circumstances and moved in circles at opposing ends of the social spectrum I have seen it for myself,the country after all survives on remittances,and not everyone of those is wired to pinas from an OFW,a decent amount is from ladies married to westerners.I am interested in which geographic area you hint at which decries mixed marriages as I have many friends married to women from top to bottom of pinas.

[dontpushme]

LOL, maybe avoid isn't the right word, but they wouldn't sniff you out either. i do have a lot of friends (in different places) that have asked me to find them foreigners to date, but the word breeding comes to mind with these people. i like them as far as friendship goes, but there are just some things i wouldn't do. i know it sounds bad considering i don't have as much money as i'm sure the other ladies here have, but i'm proud of the fact that i earn it myself, piddling as it may be.

you're right on one thing, and that's that a lot of the gossip is jealousy related, but there are also people that just feel that it's cheap to keep getting money from someone you're not related to. i may have had no money growing up, but i have to admit that my dad grew up in one of the most expensive places in the philippines, and he's the one that taught me what was unacceptable in that kind of company. it's okay to marry a foreigner, but to marry the guy because you fell in love with the way he always sent you money and rescued you from problems that would have made you stronger if you'd overcome them yourself is not.

i don't want to name places as i'm sure hometown loyalty would ensure i'd be offending people (more) if i did that. i honestly wouldn't care where your lady is from (i'm assuming Tawi-tawi, LOL). in fact, i'd say more power to her family and you guys. but i can't change the opinions i have or the opinions of the people in the area i will ultimately go home to. of course, that place is also full of foreigners, but their wives are moneyed too. i guess you could say i'm poor but am expected to have the same opinions and values as the people on the other side of the tracks. you could say i'm wrong and it's right to look for foreigners on dating websites and give sob stories left and right in the hopes that the foreigner would protect you and save you and be your knight in shining armour, but i could also say the opposite is true. where's the character growth in begging for remittances (in the beat-around-the-bush way that pinoys and pinays grow up doing)? i'm not jealous of anyone (if anyone ever offered me money, i'd get pretty mad), but i do feel bad that, like butterflies helped out of their cocoons, there are women who decide they don't want to spread their wings and fly on their own.

the philippines does survive on remittances, i'd admit that. but remittances don't teach people to take care of their resources to ensure a better future for their kids. (incidentally, i'm a big nerd hellbent on gaining as much knowledge as i can so i can someday fix our rainforests and oceans, and maybe have my dream orphanage and hopefully a scholarship foundation).

Every time I post on this forum, I half expect to see -1000 rep power. What's wrong with you people? Where are my red blobs?

[Tawi2]

Assumption is the mother of all f***-ups,i never dated a lady from Tawi-tawi,but I did spend a lot of time down there They might have sniffed me out actually,its always something decent like armani,and my sons mother and mothers son did indeed have breeding You dont choose your potential life partner like that,though thats how I would buy horse-flesh if I was looking for stock,humans cant help falling for each other,its called animal attraction Name the places............

[Tawi2]

As for the pinoy remittance culture,well,its not getting better,its actually getting worse as the remittances increase year upon year,the country has a population growth of 3% I truthfully predict times will get much worse before they get better(if ever),but one thing,not all of us have met dirt poor pinays We dont all sail in the same boat But money to me means absolutely nothing,I have been very affluent and extremely skint,I never judge people by what they do or dont have,thats poor breeding in itself.

[dontpushme]

Name the places............

LOL! I can't! I've lived in some of them and I'm almost sure some people here know my mom's family (she grew up in one of those places). My maternal grandparents saw Matt on webcam when we were still just friends that had met on Facebook, and my grandma's first reaction was "ask him if he's related to anyone older for you". That attitude got me a lotta whuppings when I was younger and insisted i didn't want to get married, let alone to some old, rich and decrepit foreigner (my grandma insisted white skin would improve my race... when did i become some dog to breed?).

As for the pinoy remittance culture,well,its not getting better,its actually getting worse as the remittances increase year upon year,the country has a population growth of 3% I truthfully predict times will get much worse before they get better(if ever),but one thing,not all of us have met dirt poor pinays We dont all sail in the same boat But money to me means absolutely nothing,I have been very affluent and extremely skint,I never judge people by what they do or dont have,thats poor breeding in itself.

I don't judge people on whether they do or don't have money. It isn't money I'm concerned about, but character. You say the remittance culture is getting worse. That doesn't mean that Filipinos are surviving on their own. It just means my country is getting increasingly dependent on foreigners. Sure, we're smart, beautiful, talented and hard-working people, but the moment someone foreign (therefore "rich") comes along, it's back to the old attitude of "oh, he can afford it" and what does that teach the next generation?

Like I said, it's not the pinay-foreigner thing that bothers me. It's the kind of character that the attitude of "my man can afford to send Dodong, Boy, Third, Fourth, Girlie, Bok, and Jojo to school, and pay for our new roof and Nanay's bills" teaches. All these kids work had while they're in school and may have ambitions of their own, but when they're adults, they think it's easier to just find a foreigner to date and marry who will support them and their extended family "just like Tita's second husband does". Of course, their degrees and skills make them more desirable to the foreigners, but what happens to the skills and talents when these brides become just housewives? I commend the ladies who still work even after marrying foreigners.

I'm sorry, but sending so much money really isn't helping in the long run. If you really want to help, teach my people to protect our seas for tourism instead of using cyanide to get tropical fish from our reefs for fish tanks in the Western world, slowly killing the corals and sea grass that the fish depend on. Teach my people to preserve the rainforests and have tourists come in to see how high our trees can grow and how beautiful the rainforests are. Teach my people that mining may bring money in but it destroys the forests above the ground, endangering whole communities during annual typhoons. Set up scholarship foundations to teach children that education can be free, but you have to work hard. Teach them that education can take them anywhere in the world to build a better future for their families. That's still all foreign money coming in to the Philippines, but it helps instead of crippling the country.

I'm not here to try and hurt people's feelings, but like I said before, I'm trying to help you see better.

And Tawi, I hope for the sake of my people that your prediction doesn't come true.

LOL, you're making me all emotional and now I've got a lump in my throat.

[Tawi2]

They arent my predictions,they are the predictions of economists,pinas population will double in 30 years,it struggles to sustain its current population and couldnt actually do so without the cash flooding in from abroad,globalisation is changing the face of the world,when I lived in Hong Kong I remember talk of the Tiger economies,pinas was never one of them due to graft corruption etc,thats one of the reasons I am not one of those guys who say "I will retire in the Philippines" ask your average westerner his impressions of Pinas,what does he think or what can he tell you about the place and its people,most know very little but what they do say is eye opening,its mainly corruption,beaches,and internet brides,I asked a few guys the other week and thats their perceptions.not the peoples fault,just the leaders

[jimeve]

I'm sorry, but sending so much money really isn't helping in the long run. If you really want to help, teach my people to protect our seas for tourism instead of using cyanide to get tropical fish from our reefs for fish tanks in the Western world, slowly killing the corals and see grass that the fish depend on. Teach my people to preserve the rainforests and have tourists c


LOL, you're making me all emotional and now I've got a lump in my throat.

The Philippines in big trouble of loosing its main source of protein, if it doesn't change very very quickly. they need a massive project sustainable aquaculture , and a marine conservation. stop the destruction of coral reefs. they are killing them self's and Innocent people.

[dontpushme]

ask your average westerner his impressions of Pinas,what does he think or what can he tell you about the place and its epople,most know very little but what they do say is eye opening,its mainly corruption,beaches,and internet brides,I asked a few guys the other week and thats their perceptions.Mot the peoples fault,just the leaders

I was hanging out with my granddad's maid when I asked her why she had so many brothers and sisters (12 siblings). She said that the attitude in her hometown was that the more kids you have, the more hands there will be to help at the farm (what about more mouths to feed then?). She's a smart girl but only finished the 9th grade. My granddad insists we should all talk to her in English because he wants to send her to school but she's ashamed of her lack of English proficiency. She says one of her younger sisters is really smart and she got accelerated to the next grade. I got excited and said her sister should apply for a scholarship. Her reply was that government scholarships don't go to the deserving in her area. They go to the ones who support the politician in charge. And private foundations are practically nonexistent there. She asked me instead to find her a foreign husband so she can send money to her family. :(

You're right, politicians do make it harder for those with talent and potential to actually be productive. But if more people worked against the politicians, then the masses would have a chance. Sending more money only adds to the stash that eventually ends up in those same politicans' pockets.

Eep! I know this is a thread on how much money to send, and it's morphed and been hijacked. Sorry!

[Tawi2]

85% of the Philippines reefs have been destroyed in the last 30 years Jim,through blast fishing,cyanide fishing and other indescriminate harvesting methods,their tourism figures cant stand alongside the likes of Thailand because the Thais understand that tourists are the geese that lay the golden eggs and make provision for that,pinas mindset is always live for today thats obviouse whether your booking into a hotel,dealing with beaurocracy,or whatever,I did a check on pinas tourists years ago,the majority were balikbayans or partners,very few genuine tourists as such,but thats a different thread methinks

[lizaphil]

Can anyone advise me on how much money would mr average send home to the phils each month, to support the family??? After the wife arrives and lives in the uk.

Sorry if this is an old question, i searched and couldnt find anything. But seems an important consideration.

Thanks
neil

hi neil
how long your wife here in the uk?
because if her visa is settlement she should be working and she should be helping you. to send money to her family,
because my hubby never help me to give to my family i am the one to help theme,or send to my family because i understand my hubby paying everything here and i know how expensive to live here in uk,not like in the Philippines everything cheap
so if your wife wanted to support her family she should go to work because
here we are working hard to get money...well me i send my son every month
but for my family just for emergency
needs

[jimeve]

85% of the Philippines reefs have been destroyed in the last 30 years Jim,through blast fishing,cyanide fishing and other indescriminate harvesting methods,their tourism figures cant stand alongside the likes of Thailand because the Thais understand that tourists are the geese that lay the golden eggs and make provision for that,pinas mindset is always live for today thats obviouse whether your booking into a hotel,dealing with beaurocracy,or whatever,I did a check on pinas tourists years ago,the majority were balikbayans or partners,very few genuine tourists as such,but thats a different thread methinks

Not interested in tourist Del, destroy the reefs, the whole marine life is finished. NO FISH.

Poor fishermen, poor hungry Pinoys, we have both seen it over there.

[Tawi2]

Thats true enough Jim,when Robson Green went on his extreme fishing venture the one country he actually struggled to land anything of an appreciable size was pinas,I have seen hundreds of yards of Gill nets strung out just off beaches,its being raped but how do you educate someone with 10 kids who needs to send them to school that he should use a larger mesh size of fish a little further offshore to give the fish a chance,he isnt interested in sporting chances or sustainable fishing,he wants cash in his pocket today,sad fact of life but thats the way it is Their meshes are tiny,they are using trammel nets with multiple pockets so everything and anything is caught,I have even known guys catch dolphins and sell them,the first time I went just off Dumaguete about 20 years ago there were huge pods of spinner Dolphin,not so many nowadays,everyone relies on the sea but no ones taking care of the ecology,its live for today syndrome.

[dontpushme]

It's that way in most of the country. We have dying, bleached coral reefs, smaller fish, less money to buy food with, and people using more and more desperate means of catching something, anything, that will feed their families.

But it doesn't have to be that way.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apo_Island
http://www.apoisland.com/apoisland-history
http://www.dumagueteinfo.com/apo-island-pictures.php

Aaanyway, where does a thread on this topic go? Is it the Culture and Food section? But that's mostly food. Is there even a place for this on the forum? I hope there is.

[jimeve]

It's that way in most of the country. We have dying, bleached coral reefs, smaller fish, less money to buy food with, and people using more and more desperate means of catching something, anything, that will feed their families.

But it doesn't have to be that way.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apo_Island
http://www.apoisland.com/apoisland-history
http://www.dumagueteinfo.com/apo-island-pictures.php

Aaanyway, where does a thread on this topic go? Is it the Culture and Food section? But that's mostly food. Is there even a place for this on the forum? I hope there is.

My favorite island, apo island, there is also a fish sanctuary at Dauin opposite Apo island, beautiful place.

[dontpushme]

My favorite island, apo island, there is also a fish sanctuary at Dauin opposite Apo island, beautiful place.

Wouldn't it be great to see that kind of community everywhere in the Philippines?

[Tawi2]

Wouldn't it be great to see that kind of community everywhere in the Philippines?

Wishful thinking but its not going to happen with a mushrooming population,just being realistic here,Jim theres also a sanctuary albeit small over on DGTE thanks to the influence of the DENR.Apo is great but its one pearl in a million oysters.

[bystander09]

If I have a fortune or savings money, I will not hesitate to buy jeepney or tricycle. Rather than sending money as I believe in Don't give fish but give them fishnet to get fish

I was just lucky I'm almost the youngest in the family and brod and sis are more stable than me. We got only one sister that we help sometimes due to her disability.

I'm also thankful that not because I send money to my Nanay, is she spends it all. I was surprised she has bank passbook and save the rest.

I also agree in emergency needs, that's why we filipinas are always saving for emergency reasons. This was taught by us when we attended CFO seminars and also a common sense to us.

Some lucky children gets inheritance from parents, and it is our culture that we can give up some properties to sell if parents is ill and no helps comes from their children. But usually, we children are working together and help each other to save our parents from illness.

Buy a jeepney or tricycle etc if you are resident in the Philippines and can manage it or them on a day to day basis. The only way to make money here is that if you are the owner driver; do not have to pay daily boundary, and have a decent route.

bystander

[dontpushme]

And if you don't break any traffic laws (breaking any usually results in the jeepney/tricycle driver bribing the traffic cops). Otherwise, you'll be on some people's list of go-to folks for whenever they need to buy stuff.