Am I being scammed?

[GaryFifer]

I will be flying out to Manila in Nov to see my BF and I am expecting to pay for everything. I know he will probably feel awkward but there is no way he can afford to pay for me, when he is on his 3 month break from the cruise ship he earns nothing for that time that he is home.

He keeps telling me to book a cheap hotel, but I don't stay in cheap hotels anywhere, so definately not in Manila.

Excuse me for point out. Isn't that a bit snobby. Sounds a bit like Cybil Fawlty. Why not live as he does, then see his family and his home.However humble. After all, he has to come 10,000 miles and live in yours, so why are you not prepared to do the same for him?

[Northerner]

In my opinion, you're right to have doubts as that is only natural. But it is unlikely to be the case of you getting scammed. There are many reasons he could be unavailable, but I would think it is because he has no money for the internet but is too proud to let you know.

I would even think that his asking you to help with the expenses whilst you are there took him a while to get the courage to muster.

But I would suggest you rough it for a day or two and live like he does, to show you have accepted his family and have not judged them (even if it is all in his mind) could do wonders for his ego. When in Rome.....

[walesrob]

Excuse me for point out. Isn't that a bit snobby. Sounds a bit like Cybil Fawlty. Why not live as he does, then see his family and his home.However humble. After all, he has to come 10,000 miles and live in yours, so why are you not prepared to do the same for him?

Agreed. You will see and experience the real Philippines.

Prior to Elsa and I getting married in 2004, I stayed at her parents' place in Tacloban, and their house was basically 1 giant room divided into 4 partitions with a kitchen, bathroom, bedroom and lounge. 6 others were also staying in this tiny building, there were no windows and nearly every night we had "brownout". I didn't complain and I was totally humbled by the whole experience.

[GaryFifer]

Agreed. You will see and experience the real Philippines.

Prior to Elsa and I getting married in 2004, I stayed at her parents' place in Tacloban, and their house was basically 1 giant room divided into 4 partitions with a kitchen, bathroom, bedroom and lounge. 6 others were also staying in this tiny building, there were no windows and nearly every night we had "brownout". I didn't complain and I was totally humbled by the whole experience.

I had a brownout. But it was because I had a bad egg. And Rob? How many times did cockroaches wake you in the night. They are noisy things.

[bornatbirth]

after all this time your being to question him

are you aware of his family live in the philipines,thats why you shouldnt of waited 2 years to go and see him then you wouldnt be asking this question.

what hotel are you staying at because i have stayed at the sofitel and far cheaper hotels,i only sleep there and cant see the point in staying at a 5 star just for that,thats why i prefer cheaper hotels and so far they have been clean but the service can be not so good...but then considering what the staff get payed,what do you expect?

[walesrob]

How many times did cockroaches wake you in the night. They are noisy things.

Oh, we had a few, but I remember the mozzies more than anything else, they had a thing about Welsh blood

[somebody]

Excuse me for point out. Isn't that a bit snobby. Sounds a bit like Cybil Fawlty. Why not live as he does, then see his family and his home.However humble. After all, he has to come 10,000 miles and live in yours, so why are you not prepared to do the same for him?

Possibly on the first visit as a lady she might want the security of a Hotel and they may not wish to share rooms? Many households in the UK or Phill cant make a spare room avaiable..

[tuft249]

its hard to beleive a filipino man would be faithful to a western women or even one there own.if they werent around for such along time.waste of an airfare &the rest

[GaryFifer]

its hard to beleive a filipino man would be faithful to a western women or even one there own.if they werent around for such along time.waste of an airfare &the rest

Is that you Ajay?

[JimOttley]

Agreed. You will see and experience the real Philippines.

Prior to Elsa and I getting married in 2004, I stayed at her parents' place in Tacloban, and their house was basically 1 giant room divided into 4 partitions with a kitchen, bathroom, bedroom and lounge. 6 others were also staying in this tiny building, there were no windows and nearly every night we had "brownout". I didn't complain and I was totally humbled by the whole experience.

Totally agree being there sharing in the real lives of real people is a humbling experience


Jim

[James Hubbard]

Is that you Ajay?

sounds like him, right?

[Queenbee]

sounds like him, right?

hehe funny..

[Queenbee]

its hard to beleive a filipino man would be faithful to a western women or even one there own.if they werent around for such along time.waste of an airfare &the rest

it's the ugly truth!!!

[englishbird]

Excuse me for point out. Isn't that a bit snobby. Sounds a bit like Cybil Fawlty. Why not live as he does, then see his family and his home.However humble. After all, he has to come 10,000 miles and live in yours, so why are you not prepared to do the same for him?

I think i can be snobby if i want!. Considering im paying for everything and that i am travelling alone to the Philippines on my own for the first time.

Im not going to be meeting his family when Im there and he doesnt have his own property as he is only home for 12 weeks of the year, so staying with him isn't an option. Do you not think that i would love to stay at his family home if i could, of course I would but on this occasion its just not practical

And, he is really looking forward to staying in a nice hotel as he lives in a cabin the size of a shoe box for 10 months at a time.

Im a snob and proud of it!!

[englishbird]

its hard to beleive a filipino man would be faithful to a western women or even one there own.if they werent around for such along time.waste of an airfare &the rest

Whats your problem!!

[englishbird]

I think there some confusion. English rose is the lady who thinks she may be being scammed.

Im English bird, Im not being scammed. Im just planning my first visit to Manila to see my BF. I have seen him alot in the last 2 years but only on the cruise ships where he is working.

Apparently Im a snob for wanting to stay in a decent hotel..

Bornatbirth.

We will probably stay in either the somerset salcedo or the somerset Makati. Not sure which yet.

[triple5]

Its difficult to tell if you're being scammed from what you've said. Trust your instincts. The fact that you're suspicious after 2 years isn't a good sign, and somebody who lives in a cabin matched with somebody who will only stay in decent hotels doesn't sound like a match made in heaven. but they do say opposites attract. Good luck and enjoy your trip.

[englishbird]

Its difficult to tell if you're being scammed from what you've said. Trust your instincts. The fact that you're suspicious after 2 years isn't a good sign, and somebody who lives in a cabin matched with somebody who will only stay in decent hotels doesn't sound like a match made in heaven. but they do say opposites attract. Good luck and enjoy your trip.

thanks, im really looking forward to my trip. Its not me whos being scammed. Its Englishrose who thinks she may be being scammed.

He only lives in a cabin because he works on a cruise ship and thats where I met him. I was on holiday and he was working in the nightclub.

[James Hubbard]

I think i can be snobby if i want!. Considering im paying for everything and that i am travelling alone to the Philippines on my own for the first time.

. . .

Im a snob and proud of it!!

Bird, with an attitude like that, your time in the Philippines will be hell.

Just sayin.

[Florge]

Bird, with an attitude like that, your time in the Philippines will be hell.

Just sayin.

soooooooo true!!!!

[James Hubbard]

soooooooo true!!!!

Thanks Florge. I feel a Bagyo outside :(

English Bird doesn't realize that there are not poor/middle class/upper class areas in the Philippines in general, but it's very heterogeneous. Let me explain:

I stayed in a 5 star hotel in Manila, but you can't make the area 5 star. As soon as you leave the hotel, you get bitten by Mozzies, have cockroaches crawling on your toes, smell sewers, almost fall over the old homeless woman sleeping on the road, get the "eye-popping" foreigner stares, have the poor and drug addicted children troubling you for money.

If you are a snob, the Philippines is a very very bad place for you to visit, given all the above.

[bornatbirth]

we are being a bit hard on her arnt we?

nothing wrong in being a snob when going on holiday and not all of us want to slum it up

i dont mind it myself but i would rather stay in a nice hotel or anywhere with no bugs running around

and you are right,sooner or later you will have to leave your nice hotel and will discover the real philipines but thats no reason to go native,thats why instead of waiting so long to see your bf or gf,i always recommend to go see them as soon as possible

[James Hubbard]

we are being a bit hard on her arnt we?

nothing wrong in being a snob when going on holiday and not all of us want to slum it up

i dont mind it myself but i would rather stay in a nice hotel or anywhere with no bugs running around

and you are right,sooner or later you will have to leave your nice hotel and will discover the real philipines but thats no reason to go native,thats why instead of waiting so long to see your bf or gf,i always recommend to go see them as soon as possible

Fair enough Born@, I just thought the attitude of being snobby and proud is one that will make a holiday in Phils very unhappy

[bornatbirth]

Fair enough Born@, I just thought the attitude of being snobby and proud is one that will make a holiday in Phils very unhappy

well if you go there thinking its like dubai it maybe,if you stay at the sofitel international for the entire trip,i feel its a waste of time of going to the philipines.

but as most of us are going to see someone,then sight seeing isnt so important.

but discovering how your future intented lifes there live is important too

[tuft249]

Whats your problem!!

cant beleive someone could be so naive.you may want to think the best of people but you have to be realistic.asking people on this forum isnt going to get you the average persons answer is it?most people outside the forum would agree with me.

[bornatbirth]

cant beleive someone could be so naive.you may want to think the best of people but you have to be realistic.asking people on this forum isnt going to get you the average persons answer is it?most people outside the forum would agree with me.

why?

do you think im a sucker waiting to be scammed,those who do get scammed are beyond stupid!

i think most on the forum have there eyes wide open and you my friend seem a little bitter and twisted.

and please dont make assumptions about me and why do you think most average people will agree with you,maybe you can elaborate on this?

[James Hubbard]

why?

do you think im a sucker waiting to be scammed,those who do get scammed are beyond stupid!

i think most on the forum have there eyes wide open and you my friend seem a little bitter and twisted.

and please dont make assumptions about me and why do you think most average people will agree with you,maybe you can elaborate on this?

[englishbird]

Bird, with an attitude like that, your time in the Philippines will be hell.

Just sayin.

Im not stupid , i know what to expect in Manila, I work in travel and have travelled to a lot of very poor areas in different countries. I just want somewhere decent to sleep, why is that so wrong?. I don't plan on spending the week holed up in the hotel. I want to see as much of the area as I can.

Thanks for sticking up for me Bornatbirth, i think James is being a little harsh as he will never know what its like to travel alone as a women, it can be scary at times.

James, im glad to hear your opinion, otherwise i wouldnt be on the forum

[englishbird]

cant beleive someone could be so naive.you may want to think the best of people but you have to be realistic.asking people on this forum isnt going to get you the average persons answer is it?most people outside the forum would agree with me.

Why are you on this forum??. Im here because im interested in other peoples opinions ( not yours though). The people on here have experience and knowledge of the Philippines which I am interested to hear.

[James Hubbard]

Im not stupid , i know what to expect in Manila, I work in travel and have travelled to a lot of very poor areas in different countries. I just want somewhere decent to sleep, why is that so wrong?. I don't plan on spending the week holed up in the hotel. I want to see as much of the area as I can.

Thanks for sticking up for me Bornatbirth, i think James is being a little harsh as he will never know what its like to travel alone as a women, it can be scary at times.

James, im glad to hear your opinion, otherwise i wouldnt be on the forum

look bird, don't get angry at me. I live in the Philippines and I am giving you valuable info. The correct reply is "thank you james".

You're welcome in advance.