Advice on Filipino-West relationship
SOURCE- The ASAWA Guide To Fil-West Relationships - 14th (2009) edition exert only.
This is a book and a website that is interesting reading, I thought you would be wish to take heed of the advice
http://filipinawives.com/index.html
Sources of Conflict in Fil-West Marriages
No marriage is perfect, obviously. The high divorce rate in many western nations is a good indicator of that. In fact, the most western men who marry Filipinas do so with the belief that Fil-West marriages are more resilient than most, and less likely to end in divorce. Statistics would seem to bear that out, since Fil-West unions have close to an 80% success rate, which is much higher, for example, than the American average.
Still, Fil-West marriages have ups and downs, like all other marriages. Husbands and wives, each with their own passions and philosophies, are prone to argue from time to time over various matters, some little and some big. A Filipina and her western husband are likely to argue over some things that are unique to Fil-West relationships, however. There are a few sources of conflict that tend to recur in Fil-West relationships, which I’ve dutifully listed below. While you may not encounter all of these incendiary issues, odds are you’ll run up against at least one of them.
1. Sending money to the Philippines: You’ll both have to decide early on how much money, if any, you will send to the Philippines. Most Filipinas believe it is morally imperative that they help support their families in the Philippines. If you agree, there’s less likely to be a problem, but even then you may disagree with your wife about how the money is being spent. You may intend it to be used for repairs to a house, for example, only to learn it was spent on school clothes. You’ll need to decide whether they money is a flat gift, to be spent as needed, even own luxuries, or whether the money is a conditional allowance, to be spent only on those items you and your wife agree on. If the money is spent on other things, will you cut the allowance off? Also, her family may or may not request funds in addition to what you would normally send. If so, do you send it always, never, or upon condition?
2. Your relationship with your families: Problems may arise if your wife thinks that your relationship to her family, or even your own, is lacking. Filipinas are family-oriented, and may be much more eager to assist your family in getting things done than even you are. If you have a bad relationship with family members, that could be a problem. Also, she will expect you to facilitate a good relationship with your in-laws.
3. Competition with neighbors: Some Filipinas are competitive. It’s all about pride, really. If your wife wants a new car, it might be because she hates the old car, or it might be because all your neighbors and friends have better cars. If you find yourself with such a lady, and you’re the thrifty type, you may have some issues.
4. Superstitions: Some Filipinas prefer folk cures to medicine, and superstitious presumptions to logic. This will frustrate men with analytical minds who trust science. If your wife is sick and refuses to take a prescription medication, but instead relies on some magical talisman that wards off curses, how will you handle the situation?
5. Religion: If you are Catholic, this is probably a non-issue for you. But if you’re not Catholic…
See web for more
Originally Posted by Ping
How do you know that ate Ping?
