Thanks for the info Hanna
Thanks for the info Hanna
Keith - Administrator
I'm sure he is "Honda" way to recovery..Sorry daft joke! Yamahahahaha
There are 7 Planes Of Existance:
7 — Material Plane: The earth, where you are right now.
6 — Plane of Forces
5 — Astral Plane
4 — Mental Plane
3 — Too mysterious to describe.
2 — Too mysterious to describe.
1 — Too mysterious to describe.
Hi folks - enfin, c'est moi!
It was just a normal Friday morning really - the birds were singing - the crocuses were croaking!
I stepped onto my threshold, took a deep breath - and collapsed! (It's rather polluted here in Cebu as you know.)
I turned to Hanna and remarked on the 'fog' that had meekly descended into our lives this morning - she just told me to put my fag out!! (I never liked him anyway!!)
Nobbut a twinkling later, I felt that familiar throbbing between my legs - that urgent, attentive feeling that every man can recognise oh so well! Yes, a mosquito had bitten my nuts!
Turning to leave for yet another day's hard labour at Stalagluft 41B, I turned to my wife to say goodbye:-
"You haven't noticed, have you?"
I visually quizzed her outburst.
"Noticed what, my flower of the desert?"
"You haven't noticed anything different about me this morning!"
Hanna is fiercely proud of always looking 'fresh out of the box.' I had to think fast, but, surveying her intensely, (Have you ever surveyed anyone's intensely? Where is it?) I had to inwardly admit a shameful defeat from this dawn interrogation - a guess was in order!!
"You've had your hair cut" I stuttered with a puerility worthy of a naughty schoolboy caught red-handed in the act of trying to sneak a peek into the girls' loos. (Not that I ever.......well, moving on.........
" No Alan - I had my hair done last week!!"
The statement was delivered as sweetly as Tchaikovsky's Nutcracker fairy - but nevertheless, contained a thousand bee stings!!!
I quite cleverly turned to the obvious compliment:-
"Ah, I know, of course. How could I miss it my dear Stig of the Dump? You have lost weight."
The ensuing two seconds of silence lasted a hundred lifetimes......
"I have NOT lost weight - in fact I have GAINED a few pounds!!! You don't pay me any attention any more."
I could feel the tension growing - the awful realisation of a blunder reminiscent of the bloke who put his life savings on Hatton lasting 3 rounds.
I had to think fast - on my feet........so I stood up and had one last 'stab.'
"You've bought a new top my War of the Worlds!!!" I clenched my buttocks so hard in anticipation of an affirmation, that my right leg is now my left!!!
"I've had this top for years."
The repost was signalling an end to world peace of the most minuscule nature! I was as lost as one of Mark Thatcher's navigators. I felt as shattered as a pane of glass at a Filipino Karaoke party. I was now lost - so, after lying, of course, the next best thing is - THE TRUTH!!!
"I'm sorry my Close Encounter of the Third Kind. I have to admit that I cannot notice any difference in your perfection. You look as beautiful to me today as you did that very first time we met on the Internet. Me at home, and you in 'The Bytes' Internet Cafe - Private Rooms Available.
You will have to tell me, my Last of the Mohecans. What is different about you today???
The reply was swift...........
"I'm wearing my gas mask!!"
Needless to say, I beat a hasty retreat (these hasty retreats are not as strong as they used to be!) and roared off into the vibrant reveille of the 30th October - a never to be forgotten morning!!!
Chapter 3
Cruising along the Palm Springsesque highway of Wireless, Mandaue City, I hung a left down towards the SM City Mall of Cebu. Surprisingly, the missing plague from the Bible - i.e. The Dreaded Plague of the Jeepneys - was conspicuous by its absence and so, uniquely, I was able to shift into 3rd and subsequently 4th gear on my way along the (relatively) deserted mass of stones, dirt and macadam that professes the appellation of 'road' here in the Philippines!
Shortly before reaching the 'junction' of Natasha's there nestles a myriad of Sari Sari stores on the right hand side of the road. On the left lies the opposite carriageway - with appropriately placed gaps where one may 'U-Turn' - except for the fact that there are 'No U-Turn' signs forbidding one to take advantage of a such manoeuvre.
Chapter 7 - The Hunt for Red October
The end of the month is 'pay day' at work. I was looking forward to being able to buy some rice again!
The aforementioned u-turn was being employed by 'someone' as I approached.
I remember waking up underneath a taxi!
I am tired and still in pain - I shall continue tomorrow!
God bless you all.
Al.
Pressed rat and warthog closed down their shop!
Judging from what you eloquently wrote, I can safely say that there ain't much wrong with yah, apart from hurt pride..... A sore, and maybe a few very painful scratches....
Relax, mate.
Concentrate on getting better and pamper Hanna.
I hope your bruises are not as purple as your prose !
Paul
OuchOriginally Posted by Alan
I hate pains
Be well Sir Allan. We missed you here
Like my Son riding on his bike very fast. people who had seen him on the road said "he is like flyin"
then in 10 minutes after, they have seen him again
this time he and his bike riding on KULIGLIG
Well we praise God, he is alright! Until now i dont want his bike be mendi really hate accidents
"Praise be to the LORD, for he showed his wonderful love to me when I was in a besieged city"...
(Psalm 31:21)
Kuliglig
"Praise be to the LORD, for he showed his wonderful love to me when I was in a besieged city"...
(Psalm 31:21)
Get well soon Sir Al...
Oh dear, sorry to hear that
Wish him a speedy recovery
It's good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good to check up once in a while to make sure you haven't lost the things that money can't buy.
That's what got him in hospital in the first placeWish him a speedy .......
Keith - Administrator
Bad bruising is incredibly painfull,but at least its nothing life-threateningly serious,alls well that ends well unless the bike is badly damaged
Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.
Wow, just read this and sorry to hear you had an accident.
Alan, or Hanna.. Message me your address and I will pop round when I can with some english tea bags and musrtard for you mate..
See you soon, take care.
Sean
Kind thought, Sean ... it had crossed my mind you might just do that anyway. Please pass on our best regards to Alan & Hanna.
Glad to learn everything is going well with you and Rizza.
Very good of you mate
Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.
Sorry to hear you had an accident Prof Alan.
Wishing for your speedy recovery.
Get well soon!
Regards.
" The people who mean something to your life are not rated "the best" don't have the most money, haven't won the greatest prizes....
They are the ones who care about you, take care of you, those who, no matter what, stay close by... "
glad to hear no serious injuries, take it easy and get well soon
Sorry to hear of your accident Alan, and am glad you suffered nothing worse than cuts and bruises, painful though I am sure that will be for some while.
Having seen the vulnerability of motor cyclists in the manic Philippines traffic I think you were a brave man using that mode of transport.
I hope the hospital bill is not as painful!
Regards Paul
Been away with work, just read this, sorry to hear of your accident Al, hope you have a quick and scar free recovery and that the bike is not expensive to repair.
Good luck Al
JOHN and VANESSA
Sorry to hear about the accident.:(
Take care and get well soon...
When in doubt, mumble.
so nice to see you back!
What about his front?
Keith - Administrator
Sir, If I'm Hanna, I will sell your bike whether you like it or not then keep the money.
Happy to see that you are back to your old self Prof
Jiri & Maricel
Hanna..Glad it wasn't as serious as all that..Hope he recovers quickly.
I use my bike occasionally but usually happier driving the car as the people here CANNOT drive period.
We lost another expat on the island (On bike) as he was overtaking another numskull that turned left without any indication..Both died instantly.
15 bikers killed in Panglao last fiesta.
Alans better off getting a multi cab if you ask me..
I`ll text shortly..
Fred.
Hi folks,
Been in hospital again today for more treatment. Just got home and feeling sore and tired. Will continue my story tomorrow.
BTW - I am emotionally overwhelmed by all the good wishes I have had on this thread - I had no idea that Hanna had done this. I have had about 4 hours sleep since the accident last Friday - here's hoping for a good night tonight.
Bless you all.
Al.
Pressed rat and warthog closed down their shop!
Least your ok,bikes can be replaced easily enough,flesh and blood cant,follow freds advice and get a vehicle
Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. But life goes on.
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows to the outside world.
Get well soon, Alan.
Glad to know you are ok
Though you do not write books, you are the writer of your life. Because everything depends on YOU.
Chapter 33 1/3 I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles.
I'll draw this thread to a close now - 'cos I'm sure you're as bored as I am!
Taken in ambulance to Cebu City Hospital - Dreadful place - basically a hospital where they let people die!!
X-Rays taken - results in 3 days. 3 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What is this??????????
Police station afterwards 'cos I was guilty of several offences.
Paid a large bribe to stay out of prison.
I shall go back home this Christmas - I shall not come back to the Philippines!
Al.
Pressed rat and warthog closed down their shop!
Being a bit of a tight, I only got you these....
Keith - Administrator
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