homesick

[fred]

Well congratulations Mick..
Dont dismiss her emotions and homesickness simply because she is pregnant..
The pregnancy has just brought them all to the fore front..Im sure she will settle down,given time.

[English Rose]

She had pregnancy test this morning ( strips ) and english rose is right she is pregnant. Now i know why she is so emotional. When we saw the 2 red lines she was just staring at me and its like she is going to cry again lol. I am so happy but last night when we were at tesco for our weekly shopping she is moaning that she is feed up with the food here and how she misses ripe mango and philippine fish and lots of philippine food.

She's going to miss her mum even more now. Encourage her to go to any ante natal classes on offer so she meets other mothers-to-be, she'll need another woman to talk to. On the plus side, having a baby means classes, mother and baby groups, lots of new friends, even strangers stopping you in the street to talk to you and admire the baby.

I still remember the wonderfully fresh food, especially mango, in the Philippines and I was only there for 3 weeks. I suggest you do your best to find better quality food than is sold at Tesco. Morrisons is the only supermarket that sells fish that hasn't been frozen. I don't know where you live, but perhaps you can source some fruit and vegetables that have been grown locally or organic meat from a local farm. The taste is so much better.

[somebody]

This might be a curved ball but I am wondering if she is pregnant as this plays havoc with your hormones.

It's in the Filipino culture to be dependent on family in a way we're not. They simply do not understand the concept of independence as we know it. She's never going to behave as an English woman would (not living with her mother etc).

Is there a local Filipino Association near you? There is one near me, and they organise all sorts of social events, badminton etc.

I do get what you mean by the avg Pinays sense of/need for family is much more stronger than the typical Brit Lady. But I can think of so many very resillent and independent Pinays who I see and know. Both Spouses and OFWs here and abroad.

I know plenty of Filipinas in our local area who are very independent many normally only after finding themsleves divorced and stuck in the UK with young Kids. My Sister and other Woman of their same age who are UK born who may have traveled and lived abroad for gap years etc when younger have all commented on well these ladies adapt and cope often to a degree they dont they would if the roles reversed.

My Sister actually commented she felt homesick so badly when in Aus and New Zealand and she knew she was not there for well possibly the rest of her life. She lived in her own flat away from the family in the UK before and after the trip so it was not being with the family just being in a different enviroment.

Many of the Wifes friends(Pinays) now cant settle with a guy they tell me because they find themsleves are very independent now and many guys in the UK think that because they Asian they will be meek, dependent on other types and basically wanted to be dominated by a stronger partner

One looks almost african in features and finds guys change their attitude towards her if she mentions she is asian

The lady wants to see if she can work or college yet her hubby doesn't want her to.

WHy oh why do so many think Pinays wanted to be bossed about

One thing i noticed in Phill, Italy and the UK was how strong the Woman was in the Phill Family many are the breadwinner and do most about the house.


So im sure this young lady will not faint if she has a Job or goes to College if its possible.

But now reading she is preggers that of course makes all the difference. Again dont worry many Pinays before her have coped but she does need a network of friends both Phill and from wherever to support her.

[Florge]

i have been feeling that the last 3 months actually... been here for 6 months and i truly truly miss my old life... i hate feeling so dependend on my husband.. i have been working and earning good money back home, and here.. i can't even get a job interview!

so what do i do? chat with some friends! i am lucky to have pinay friends online who keeps telling me to hang on .. so, if she can also do the same... where are you at? there must be a filipina somewhere near...

what helps also is that hubby takes me to a massage and spa when he's not working (one of the things i love to do when I was still in Pinas - so it's a taste of home)... taking day trips just so i get to see other sights... and now, getting to dance classes and trying my luck on gardening... enrol her in some courses in your community center.. that helps as well..

[malditako]

She had pregnancy test this morning ( strips ) and english rose is right she is pregnant. Now i know why she is so emotional. When we saw the 2 red lines she was just staring at me and its like she is going to cry again lol. I am so happy but last night when we were at tesco for our weekly shopping she is moaning that she is feed up with the food here and how she misses ripe mango and philippine fish and lots of philippine food.

while i was reading your post i was thinking maybe she is pregnant thats why she's acting that way...so i was right then congrats...

i was like her when i was pregnant and even more few months after i gave birth...emotioal, sensitive, grumpy...name it

anyway it takes time to adjust....support her on the things she wanted to do...just staying at home will not boost her confidence...maybe thats why she wanted to go to college its because she wanted to prove herself more than just being a wife and soon be mum