My wife is so emotional this morning and just cried while we were talking about her life in the Philippines and here in UK.
I noticed when I got up this morning and tried to kiss her that she is bit grumpy.
But when I come downstairs she is there already facing her laptop.
She then sat beside me and I asked why she is grumpy.
She just said coz I turn my back on her and I said that’s not true I even cuddled you this morning and she said yeah you did but after that u turn your back on me.
I still didn’t understand but I just stopped my self to ask more.
She started saying that she is bored here.
She said she has very low self esteem and thought that living here will help her gain confidence.
She said she feel so useless here and can’t even understand people most of the time.
She said Her life in Philippines is better coz even if sometimes she is alone if she gets bored she just go SM and eat Jollibee or just go out for window shopping she is happy already and she said but here I cant even ride bus on my own and cant go town on my own. So I said so why wont you and she said I am shy and worried I might not understand them.
And then she said she don’t feel good today and she feel sick and said in the Philippines if I get sick my mum looks after me but here no one looks after me coz u are working. In Philippines my mum cooks for me and no one can look after me better as much as my mum does.
I said yeah its nice that your mum pampers you and look after you when u are sick but you are adult now and u should learn to live without your mum and learn to look after your self. We raised and taught our kids here to be independent in an early age but I think that’s the way it should be coz look at you, your 26 and you cant even sleep alone coz your still scared.
And she said but we love our parents more than you do here.
You don’t even want to live with your mum and then she started crying.
I asked her why are you crying she said coz I am bored here and while I am talking to her she is just quite and listening but when I looked at her face she is still crying and look so sad and upset so I asked her again why your crying so much today? And she said coz I miss philippines.
I never saw her cried like that before. She arrived here October 18 last year and the first day she arrived here she was just teary eye and cried when she phone her mum to let her know we arrive safe, but that’s it, she never cried after that until today and she didn’t even cried that much as much as she did today.
She didn’t even cried when we were at cebu airport and her family was there to say goodbye to us.
She said she don’t want to cry coz it will just make everyone cry too.
She is always happy and sweet and always run in the front door everytime she heard my car in the drive way. Always welcome me home with a big hug and lots of kisses and last night even asked me to carry her from the front door to the living room.
So I really thought she is happy and settling down, but then sad to say that im wrong.