Hi Englishman2010, so sorry to hear of your predicament.
Going by what you have just posted, about providing of proof of funds etc, sounds like you had picked the short straw on eco selection
Go through the appeal process and God willing you we will both get the correct result.
I don't think I would blame your Lady because she has no job
, she won't be able to save from that 'job' anyway, you work to eat, that's about it, not to have savings as well.
Many a Tourist visa issued without girl friends having employment.
Just take time looking through previous threads on this subject, I'm sure it will enlighten you both.
Good luck to you both