How do you deal with negative comments about The Philippines/Filipina's?

[Englishman2010]

Just wondering how you react or deal with the numerous negative comments and incorrect stereotypes about The Philippines and Filipina's from people who have never been there and probably never met a Filipino/a in their life?

Me, I don't really care what people say or think about me, whatever they think is their opinion and they won't change it to suit me, so I let them get on with it.

However, I feel that I have to come to the defense of my Filipina g/f and The Philippines.

Whenever I mention I have a Filipina g/f or that I am going to The Philippines, the usual comments I get range from tongue in cheek jokes to those who want to be helpful/interfere and warn me of the dangers, to the ones i hear 3rd hand.

Typical comments are:
She's only after a passport and your money.
Be careful, I had a 'friend' who got scammed by a Filipina...etc
Check she isn't really a post operative tranny
Aren't they all prostitutes
I bet she already has a husband who keeps out the way when you are in town
Make sure you don't catch anything when you go there
I bet its full of old white pervs and paedo's

etc, etc... you all know the score by now

Anyway, my beautiful Filipina makes me far happier and looks after me far better than my ex-wife ever could, and she's kinder to my wallet (just).

[raynaputi]

Hey Englishman! I'm not sure if this question is just for the guys...but being a Filipina, I myself hear it quite often, especially with people I've met online who have been told of that as well..Honestly I can't blame some of them sometimes for their comments..coz let's face the truth, there are lots of Filipina who do such things...I myself even give advice to them to be careful...BUT, I make sure to tell them not every Filipina is like those girls! We Filipinas in the forum can attest to that... When I hear those things from foreigner friends, I just tell them many of us can prove them WRONG..and then let them see what I mean thru my actions, attitude and manners..if they still think the same no matter what I tell them, then I just ignore their comments and doesn't let my life be affected by those who don't understand and know me.. I'M ONE PROUD FILIPINA no matter what everyone else think of us!

[somebody]

Just wondering how you react or deal with the numerous negative comments and incorrect stereotypes about The Philippines and Filipina's from people who have never been there and probably never met a Filipino/a in their life?

Me, I don't really care what people say or think about me, whatever they think is their opinion and they won't change it to suit me, so I let them get on with it.

However, I feel that I have to come to the defense of my Filipina g/f and The Philippines.

Whenever I mention I have a Filipina g/f or that I am going to The Philippines, the usual comments I get range from tongue in cheek jokes to those who want to be helpful/interfere and warn me of the dangers, to the ones i hear 3rd hand.

Typical comments are:
She's only after a passport and your money.
Be careful, I had a 'friend' who got scammed by a Filipina...etc
Check she isn't really a post operative tranny
Aren't they all prostitutes
I bet she already has a husband who keeps out the way when you are in town
Make sure you don't catch anything when you go there
I bet its full of old white pervs and paedo's

etc, etc... you all know the score by now

Anyway, my beautiful Filipina makes me far happier and looks after me far better than my ex-wife ever could, and she's kinder to my wallet (just).

Firstly I would not worry to much about it sadly people will say things one thing i have learned is people from all round the world seem to old bigoted views which seem to be rude about one group or another.

Many if not all of your friends and family hopefully once they meet your Wife and she is suddenly a person not a simply a name will suddenly have a different view point.

For many indigeous Brits who have lived among their own for most of there life it must be tough. I have to say where the Wife and I live in London mixed race couples are nothing unusual. Knowing Fillipino/as is nothing out of the ordinary. But I can imagine that elsewhere in the UK thats not always the same.

Sadly the best way is to grin and bear it know the people to avoid and show the others what an amazing person your Mahal is.

Funny how people change once they meet people and get to know people who they once though lack of awareness used to dismiss.

[RickyR]

Know more about the Philippines then them, and be able to talk about it and your missus confidently. Read a few travel books, at least you'll be able confidently put them right on incorrect assumptions.

[triple5]

I have nothing to do with those kind of people anymore. Put up a few pics on facebook of the perfect beaches here then delete those "friends" a few days later. Those kind of people who make retarded comments are usually the kind who live in boxes staring at boxes every night, then think they're living the dream going to benidorm once a year. You know the type, complain about all the Indians in england, then treat themselves to an Indian takeaway once a month

Don't take it personally mate The world's full of the narrow-minded fools

[sars_notd_virus]

Hi Englishman2010..you dont need to deal with negative comments about filipinas.
Women will always be Women regardless of AGE and RACE,..a female specie who will complete the world of Men with great pleasure and satisfaction and should be handled with TLC (tender loving care)

[johncar54]

Stereotyping can be a problem but I think it is universal.

I spent 5 months travelling in USA (15,000 miles) the result I don't like Americans. Having said that I have some very good friends who are Americans.

We live in Spain. The UK media is constantly harping on about 'The Costa Del Crime' implying that, many of us, are criminals. The relatively few Brits who get into trouble here, tends to make us feel we are all being considered as a problem in some way.

I am on the point of taking up Irish Nationality. Last week's headlines here were commenting on 'The Irish Mafia' who is active on the coast. Guess when 'I am Irish' that will include me !

My children in UK were very pleased when I decided not to continue my relationship with a Thai lady but look for a wife in the Philippines as 'All Thais are prostitutes' but 'All Filipinos are nurses.'

I guess at the end of the day we must try to show by example that who ever we are, good, bad or otherwise; we are individuals and should be judged as such.

[pennybarry]

We Filipinas learned how to accept and respect what others have to say and want even if it's different from what we expect if they are speaking generally. BUT we also answer them back to defense ourselves. We hate those Filipinas who contributes bad reputation, destroy our morality as a whole and harming other foreigners by scamming them. We are proud of being Filipina for being educated, beautiful, hardworking, simple, sensible and tried to show the world how good we are! I am a Filipina!
We can all be Proudly Pinay!

[stevewool]

hi englishman, when i use to talk to people about the phils they always came back thinking thailand, i have never been to thailand so cannot comment , but i have been to the phils my future wife is from the phils,i have never known more pleasent people and to tell the truth the people that know me well think i am not that silly now and i think they are a little jeolouse too so i say stuff them them all

[KeithD]

Ask those same people to point out the Philippines on a map and 90%+ won't have a clue.... uneducated most of them that probably believe soaps are real

The English are known as thugs in the EU, Britain as invaders in the Middle East, former Colonialists in India, and many other countries... Poms in Aus .... and if we reverse them they'd be classed as racist views & comments in this country

Personally, as long as you are happy, who gives a what others say or think.... I never do?

[les_taxi]

My girlfriends picture is my screen saver on my phone and when i get a call the phone lights up and anyone sitting behing me in taxi can see her picture for a few seconds (due to position of phone on dashboard)
I usuallly hear (you lucky sod)

[Alan]

There's only one word for this attitude - ignorance!

Al.

[aposhark]

I tell people very proudly that I am married to the most beautiful, loving, tactile woman in the world.
I tell them that I have travelled a lot and, in my opinion, there is no place in the world that can better the Philippines for the beautiful nature of the people.
They seem to glaze over and wish they were there
I don't really get any bad comments, especially when they say they haven't been there.....
So, how would they know?

Englishman, you say you are not bothered.....but you are.
Use your intellect to educate them, without them realising you are doing it!

[Englishman2010]

Very good replies from all of you, thank you very much. I agree with everything that you all say. I already do much of what's suggested, but there are some other good tips too.

Yes the British are ignorant, I've been lucky enough to see a lot of the world and am always embarrassed when I see a drunk Brit giving a customs official somewhere in the third world a hard time. Unfortunately, Chavs are allowed to have passports too.

[gWaPito]

I have nothing to do with those kind of people anymore. Put up a few pics on facebook of the perfect beaches here then delete those "friends" a few days later. Those kind of people who make retarded comments are usually the kind who live in boxes staring at boxes every night, then think they're living the dream going to benidorm once a year. You know the type, complain about all the Indians in england, then treat themselves to an Indian takeaway once a month

Don't take it personally mate The world's full of the narrow-minded fools

Even family, which includes mine and I'm talking about my Son Daughter and first wife.
My wife accepts them, they will not, they have even tried 'It's us or her' thing!
Jane knew I have been married before and that I have 2 grown up kids 26 and 29.
Jane has accepted them and loved them, they on the other hand will not.

I have wondered why they are like this as my brother and sisters mother and father are not like this.

I put it down to being away from home while they were growing up, they were spoilt by there mother.
I guess it was to make up for my absences making a better life, how wrong was I !!!!!!

My loyalty is with my wife of course, they say blood is thicker than water, in this case it's not.
My wife is number 1 and always will be.

[gWaPito]

I have nothing to do with those kind of people anymore. Put up a few pics on facebook of the perfect beaches here then delete those "friends" a few days later. Those kind of people who make retarded comments are usually the kind who live in boxes staring at boxes every night, then think they're living the dream going to benidorm once a year. You know the type, complain about all the Indians in england, then treat themselves to an Indian takeaway once a month

Don't take it personally mate The world's full of the narrow-minded fools

Even family, which includes mine and I'm talking about my Son Daughter and first wife.
My wife accepts them, they will not, they have even tried 'It's us or her' thing!
Jane knew I have been married before and that I have 2 grown up kids 26 and 29.
Jane has accepted them and loved them, they on the other hand will not.

I have wondered why they are like this as my brother and sisters mother and father are not like this.

I put it down to being away from home while they were growing up, they were spoilt by there mother.
I guess it was to make up for my absences making a better life, how wrong was I !!!!!!

My loyalty is with my wife of course, they say blood is thicker than water, in this case it's not.
My wife is number 1 and always will be.

[nigel]

Both Filipinas and Thai Girls maybe Malaysian and other Asian girls get talked about like they're prostitutes who say things like "You handsome man... me love you long time..no money no honey!" I guess it's an inaccurate view of them but harmless fun mostly...I've had fun with such things sometimes...

The comment I don't like is the one that goes "Whats your wife cost ten dollar?" cause this would imply she's cheap or something... it could be friendly sillyness I suppose...but if it isn't...

[Englishman2010]

Both Filipinas and Thai Girls maybe Malaysian and other Asian girls get talked about like they're prostitutes who say things like "You handsome man... me love you long time..no money no honey!" I guess it's an inaccurate view of them but harmless fun mostly...I've had fun with such things sometimes...

The comment I don't like is the one that goes "Whats your wife cost ten dollar?" cause this would imply she's cheap or something... it could be friendly sillyness I suppose...but if it isn't...

That's mostly what I get, tongue in cheek stuff like 'me love u long time' 'hope you didn't catch anything' or 'check for meat and 2 veg' type comments on my facebook photo's.
I think that most Brit's think that The Philippines is part of/next door to Thailand and it is the same, or the whole of Asia is the same.

[joebloggs]

That's mostly what I get, tongue in cheek stuff like 'me love u long time' 'hope you didn't catch anything' or 'check for meat and 2 veg' type comments on my facebook photo's.
I think that most Brit's think that The Philippines is part of/next door to Thailand and it is the same, or the whole of Asia is the same.

you can try and ignore the or them, but i try and educate them a little, i tell people now my misses is from an island called Palawan near the south china sea, Google a couple of pictures to show them where my misses family live, and the only reply i usually get is 'lucky "

[Steve.r]

To quite honest, the general person in the street who makes that sort of comment wouldn't even be able to point to the Philippines on the map. I have heard a lot of comments like the ones already mentioned, but shug it off as just narrow minded ignorance. But when does this change? where do you draw the line? Do the comments stop when your friends know you are serious or engaged to your Mahal? I would find it an insult 'to me' and 'my Mahal' if someone I knew came out with those comments knowing we were togther.

[DaveUK]

Before Yam arrived in the UK, I've found 99.9% of cases when friends and work colleagues asked me about Yam or when I would be next seeing her, it was always "When are you going back to Thailand?"!!

It frustrated me when they did as you know they don't mean anything bad by it, but you do get a glimpse into what they are thinking sub-consciously!! I always want to slap them and it "upsets" me that even my friends can't even make the effort to get the country right! But as it's my friends, I also don't want to make too big a deal of it as like I say, they don't consciously mean anything nasty by it!

If it ever does happen now, I just look at them disapprovingly and sigh very obviously. Then if they don't get it, I point it out and they feel suitably bad about it and apologise

[triple5]

when friends and work colleagues asked me about Yam or when I would be next seeing her, it was always "When are you going back to Thailand?"!!

Yep, I've heard that one before One time, right after I said I'm going to the PHILIPPINES, I got, "Hahaha you're not going to come back with a Thai bride are ya?"

Like Steve says, most of them couldn't even point it out on a map. Their loss

[Languish]

I have had to be somewhat economical with the truth occasionally - especially in the beginning, but since my visit in April, its less of a concern to conceal my feelings and intentions... personally i don't give a rats what they think.

[Dedworth]

Rarely happened to me but would suggest, broad shoulders, water off a ducks back, sticks and stones won't break type attitude

[KeithD]

Just ask them who'd they'd rather , their own wife or yours ..... you know what the truth is

[les_taxi]

Just ask them who'd they'd rather , their own wife or yours ..... you know what the truth is

Amen to that

[Englishman2010]

Rarely happened to me but would suggest, broad shoulders, water off a ducks back, sticks and stones won't break type attitude

[bornatbirth]

theres a element of truth in whatever they say, most people dont even know where the philipines is, so why let it bother you?, why not inform them and show them a photo of your wife

[malditako]

am not bother at all...who are them to prove ourselves (filipinas) anyway. i guess they are just ignorant, uneducated and too nosy about who they are and from country they came from...

[nigel]

'hope you didn't catch anything'

Oooooh I do not like that!??


Other comments I get are "I bet she's a petite little thing! Is her name Ding Ding?" I guess this is just friendly fun...