sending a income

[triple5]

This is to everybody... Before sending anything ask yourself would she love you just the same if you gave her nothing Would there be tampo if you said NO one time I do help my gf out, but like subseastu says if you make sure its going to a good cause where they can use to then support themselves, and not to idle cousins who spend it on red horse With what I give my gf she pays the credit on a fridge for her folks, and now they sell ice and lollies to the neighbours. I helped her out with her rent when she was still studying. She's kind of independent anyway, and wants to earn her own cash instead of having an allowance off me. Plus she likes to keep busy, it'd drive her mad shopping and sitting in parlours all the time.

Some of the sums being stated here seem very OTT. Even if there's a reason why she can't work herself, can't see why anybody would send anything more than the average wage here

[triple5]

My g/f needs at least 2000 pm just to keep her Blackberry on line and to pay for her text messages to me. I would guess that basic food is in the region of at least 4000 a month, add to that accomodation costs, transport, toileteries and money for a few clothes, you are soon looking at 25K pesos per month...and that is for a basic standard of living, not one which I am used to or would want to live.

Since when is having a blackberry a basic standard of living Most people do just fine here on less than half of 25K. Not sure where you're getting your figures

[stevewool]

it seems all my dreams are in shatters i was hoping to live out in the phils on 25k a month but seems like once out there i better get a rich spinster to help me out

[subseastu]

it seems all my dreams are in shatters i was hoping to live out in the phils on 25k a month but seems like once out there i better get a rich spinster to help me out

Depends on your lifestyle steve, I think its do-able just have to drink the REALLY cheap rhum instead of the normal cheap rhum! If you find a rich spinster see if she's a rich spinster sister as well will you. THink I could manage being a toyboy!

[stevewool]

well all i asked was a simple question about what to send and wow, now i know how wars start, my lifestyle is cheap like we have said before a bear in one hand the bbq on and sun on my face, i have even thought of not buying loo paper once there and just wash look haw much that will save

[stevewool]

my typing is crap i ment a beer not a bear my hands arnt that big

[subseastu]

well all i asked was a simple question about what to send and wow, now i know how wars start, my lifestyle is cheap like we have said before a bear in one hand the bbq on and sun on my face, i have even thought of not buying loo paper once there and just wash look haw much that will save

Things certainly blow up fast in some of these threads. THink you should've put a religous angle on it mate, that would've kept things calm!!

You don't even need to wash mate, just straddle the bannister on the stairs and slide down. Cleaned and fun

[subseastu]

my typing is crap i ment a beer not a bear my hands arnt that big

Could have a small bear in one hand and a large beer in the other

[stevewool]

who do you think i am roger de courcey with nookie bear

[subseastu]

If you are can I book you for my nephew's birthday party?

[johncar54]

who do you think i am roger de courcey with nookie bear

I saw him (maybe them, as the bear was with him ! ) at a stag do maybe 30 years ago. I could not believe how spontaneously crude he could be at the stag do, but then be able to switch it off, and not accidentally slip, when he was entertaining children.

[gWaPito]

I think send what you can afford, what else can you do? Why should you send more than you can afford? I think it is too easy to just support a partner, or have them 100% rely on you. Should you expect that? If they had never met you how were they living? they managed on very little, but made do. Spoil someone and it is expected and then some. Be real. I am no multi millionaire here, so help when and with what I can.

When my wife was living in Manila I was sending 15,000 fixed every 4th week when I got paid, whatever the exchange rate was.
At least Jane was able to budget/manage her money.
I gave her one of visa cards and made the mistake to put more in the account on this particular month, just as a safety measure.
Jane thought it was extras and spent it

It was my fault of course that it was spent

We had an understanding after that, when the 15,000 was gone, that was it until my next pay day.

Those days have gone now thank goodness, Jane is here with me in the UK

[David House]

I have been there and done it all. Bought 2 jeeps, set up and stocked sari sari stores, set and equiped a motor repair shop, paid for a niece to study nursing, provided fertilser for rice fields etc etc. It's all gone, every last peso. Some people just can't handle it so now we only send the basic amount for food and fuels and then go and buy things for them ourselves whilst there. That way we know the money gets spent on what is supposed to go on.
I know we have been unlucky but we are far from unusual as I have heard many similar stories. All I would say is be careful and if it feels wrong then almost certainly it is wrong. Don't send too much, as it will never be enough, and it can do more harm than good.

[stevewool]

hi there david house i tried to read your blog but could not get onto it the site is there another way

[sparky]

Things certainly blow up fast in some of these threads. THink you should've put a religous angle on it mate, that would've kept things calm!!

You don't even need to wash mate, just straddle the bannister on the stairs and slide down. Cleaned and fun

combine the two and start a thread of how much you put in the church collection box

then stand back and watch the fireworks

[gWaPito]

I think 500-600 GBP is reasonable if the man has a baby to support.

However, if the g/f or fiancee does not have children and is able to work, I see no reason why she shouldn't make an effort to find work even if it is only for a couple of hundred pesos a day. In my situation, I would make up the difference from her earnings to ensure she had a decent standard of living. I don't think anyone should be picky about what job they do to make a living.

Personally, I have a good professional job and have been well educated and I don't want to do a hard physical manual working job, but if I was unable to do my current job and needed to earn money to survive, I would take on anything for an income - Street cleaner, toilet cleaner, security guard ...etc.

I agree, £500 per month for someone who has babies. When you consider the cost of baby formula is just as expensive in the Philippines as it is here in the west
We all want our babies to grow big and strong, the first 2 years in a childs life are so important, the foundations for the rest of there lives

[Arthur Little]

start a thread of how much you put in the church collection box

then stand back and watch the fireworks

... like I'VE been doing for the past couple of weeks since starting that ill-fated thread of mine. It IS strange ... but true!!

[subseastu]

I have been there and done it all. Bought 2 jeeps, set up and stocked sari sari stores, set and equiped a motor repair shop, paid for a niece to study nursing, provided fertilser for rice fields etc etc. It's all gone, every last peso. Some people just can't handle it so now we only send the basic amount for food and fuels and then go and buy things for them ourselves whilst there. That way we know the money gets spent on what is supposed to go on.
I know we have been unlucky but we are far from unusual as I have heard many similar stories. All I would say is be careful and if it feels wrong then almost certainly it is wrong. Don't send too much, as it will never be enough, and it can do more harm than good.

Well said that man

[subseastu]

... like I'VE been doing for the past couple of weeks since starting that ill-fated thread of mine. It IS strange ... but true!!

Please god not again!!!!!

[stevewool]

we all have opinions and thats good and a forum like this helps and gives good advice too , plus if you dont like what people say dont read it i say

[aposhark]

You're having a laugh aren't you? How else do you expect them to live, with rent, bills, food etc. That dosen't buy any luxuries

No
I'm with stevewool on this.
We send money to the Phils but my main responsibility is to our bills here in the UK.
We have also sent money for emergencies.

[Arthur Little]

I could not believe how spontaneously crude he could be at the stag do, but then be able to switch it off, and not accidentally slip, when he was entertaining children.

... you mean "roger" with "nookie", John? Well, I suppose you can't have one without the other!

[stevewool]

thankyou, my thoughts are pay my mortgage and others and then all the money i will be saving i can think about emmas family, it must be hard for people whos wife, partner is in the phils and they are here working , but we all have to live still

[aposhark]

I think you misunderstood me... I'm not sending her luxury money, this is survival money...This thread is starting to annoy me a bit. I don't think some of you realise the costs in the Philippines?
My wife can only get a part-time job, that pays 100php per day. There is a minimum wage in the Philippines, but nobody seems to pay it?...How is she supposed to live on that?

Most of us have been to the Philippines a lot Sim11UK, so we make judgements on finances based on our experiences.
These judgements are based on so many things that are different for all of us.
I supported my wife before we got married and also now that she is no longer working in the UK getting ready for our first child.

[Arthur Little]

we all have opinions and thats good and a forum like this helps and gives good advice too , plus if you dont like what people say dont read it i say

Thank you, Steve ... well put!

[aposhark]

That's as much as many Filipino families have to live on each week. I think that if you send much more than is required then it's likely to create a dependancy culture within the whole family which will continue long after your mahal gets to the UK and which could cause problems in your relationship at a later stage. You should always remember, they all survived long before they had a foriegner in the family and on far far less in most cases.

Spot on as usual Mr. Busby

[gWaPito]

we all have opinions and thats good and a forum like this helps and gives good advice too , plus if you dont like what people say dont read it i say

Well said that man, I totally agree

[aposhark]

combine the two and start a thread of how much you put in the church collection box

then stand back and watch the fireworks

Hmmmmmmm

[gWaPito]

Hmmmmmmm

hummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm too

[aposhark]

Please god not again!!!!!

what's a dog got to do with it