I have been there and done it all. Bought 2 jeeps, set up and stocked sari sari stores, set and equiped a motor repair shop, paid for a niece to study nursing, provided fertilser for rice fields etc etc. It's all gone, every last peso. Some people just can't handle it so now we only send the basic amount for food and fuels and then go and buy things for them ourselves whilst there. That way we know the money gets spent on what is supposed to go on.
I know we have been unlucky but we are far from unusual as I have heard many similar stories. All I would say is be careful and if it feels wrong then almost certainly it is wrong. Don't send too much, as it will never be enough, and it can do more harm than good.
