yorkie,
Sorry to hear this.
I have a close friend in a similar situation. I have posted here and have made phone calls and e-mails to Brit Emb/Home Office and UK Border Agency.
To date I have not found any solution but am still looking.
I did have one idea, that involved my friend discussing with her employer along the lines of supplying a letter of continuing employment and that if/when she got her ILR that she would resign and seek other employment.
I believe it's possible to apply for ILR 28 days in advance of the exact 5 year date. During the application process the existing visa status remains in force until a final decision is made.
My friend is still considering what to do and has not approached her employer concerning if they can help. She may do that as the key dates get closer.

Concerning the Min Wage this is the latest:-
From October 2010, National Minimum Wage rates will increase from:

•£5.80 to £5.93 an hour for workers aged 21 and over

•£4.83 to £4.92 an hour for workers aged 18 to 20

•£3.57 to £3.64 an hour for workers aged 16 to 17

So if my friend could convince her employer to provide a letter of continuing employment she could mention that she would be prepared to accept min wage rates...thereby reducing their employment costs (she already get higher than min)

That's my only thinking right now. As you say, it's very tough when you have built up a new life and then see no way to continue.