gone silent

[dontpushme]

Hi BCB, I just read this whole thread in one sitting (phew!) and I wanted to say that your worries about something bad happening to her were unfounded. If she had been hurt or something bad had happened to her, her phone wouldn't have rung and it would have gone straight to the "unattended" message.

So now it's come to this then? I'm sorry that you went through so much emotional turmoil with this girl. I hope it's not the Dane but if it is, just be glad you didn't lose more than you did. I know that sounds like a generic response, but seriously, it's a good thing she didn't string you along for longer than she has.

Lancashirelad's right. I think if a woman won't let you dive in and meet her family and interact with them on your own and without her supervision, there might be a good reason to watch your step. In the Philippines, family comes first. And if a woman wanted to be with you, she'd want her family to approve of you, which means she'd want her family to interact with you so you can make a good impression on them.

Mick, I didn't realise you went through so much! :( I honestly don't understand how people move on after being hurt and betrayed like that. But I guess that shows strength of character to be able to pull yourself up, dust yourself off and keep going.

[mindanao]

BCB, so you found out that she seeing another guy. Am sorry. So now, STOP everything that concerns about her..
Sad to say there are some pinays who made a CAREER out of befriending and gettting into relationships with westerner coz it pays well. These pinays gets money, presents, free trips about nice expensive resorts in the country. Afterwards, they'll find another one who will give more treats than the other. Easy jobs ... So guys and gals be careful as loads have been scammed too.

[mickcant]

Mick, I didn't realise you went through so much! :( I honestly don't understand how people move on after being hurt and betrayed like that. But I guess that shows strength of character to be able to pull yourself up, dust yourself off and keep going.

Hi dontpushme,
Things went on over a longish period of time, and I just did not expect to be treated like that

It is not yet over but I have had no contact with her for around six months, I still have some very black moments and wonder how I could have been so thick not to realise

Perhaps becouse I expected to be treated as I treated her with "love and caring"
Thanks,
Mick.

[fred]

Don't know if it's been mentioned yet, but (unless you plan on emigrating to the Phils)
the father of your girlfriend's kids could well throw a spanner in the works for any future plans you may have to bring the family to the UK. He has the right to refuse giving his consent to the removal from the country of his children. Which, as a father myself I can fully empathise with.

If your girlfriend is still married, it could also take years and a great deal of expense to have the marriage annulled.

If the husband filed an adultery complaint before any annulment they could both end up in prison for 5 years..

[dontpushme]

Hi dontpushme,
Things went on over a longish period of time, and I just did not expect to be treated like that

It is not yet over but I have had no contact with her for around six months, I still have some very black moments and wonder how I could have been so thick not to realise

Perhaps becouse I expected to be treated as I treated her with "love and caring"
Thanks,
Mick.

Well, you had every right to be treated properly and she blew it.

Your story reminds me of one of the ladies who goes to my church here. She said she was in a long-distance relationship when she was younger and it took her two and a half years to realise that he was not who she thought he was. She said that she remembers sitting in a movie theater with him and it just dawned on her then and there that he was not the man she thought she knew. All the lies just came crashing down on her head and he kept pretending everything was okay. Just goes to show how it can really take years for someone to see what's wrong with a relationship.

[mickcant]

Well, you had every right to be treated properly and she blew it.

Your story reminds me of one of the ladies who goes to my church here. She said she was in a long-distance relationship when she was younger and it took her two and a half years to realise that he was not who she thought he was. She said that she remembers sitting in a movie theater with him and it just dawned on her then and there that he was not the man she thought she knew. All the lies just came crashing down on her head and he kept pretending everything was okay. Just goes to show how it can really take years for someone to see what's wrong with a relationship.

When we were together I was very happy and would have done anything to stay together, she did not feel the same, it finally sunk in with me when she said she would not come to marriage guidence with me, she just did not want to save the marriage, all she wanted was to be able to work here and send money home
Mick.

[phoebe]

Hi BCB,
I am really sorry for what has happened to you.It was not nice of her for doing this to you .She should have told you. She obviously do not deserve you. Please do take care of yourself and you will get over this . I am sure everyone here will support you thru this times.Hang in there .

[blackcatbone]

firstly i would like to thank each and every one here you have all been so nice to me over this sorry mess i feel like i've found a home here almost before this i was only ever here on and off but i intend being more part of this community once again thank you all for your support and kindness

[Dedworth]

firstly i would like to thank each and every one here you have all been so nice to me over this sorry mess i feel like i've found a home here almost before this i was only ever here on and off but i intend being more part of this community once again thank you all for your support and kindness

I was very sorry to hear the way it had turned out there always seem to be a few not so nice outcomes reported on here to offset all the good one's

I hope that your ration of bad luck has been used for 2011 and everything goes great for you from now on. Every cloud has a silver lining, stay positive etc etc

[malditako]

I know it might sound cruel,, but you might find a better match while you're there too.

Plus...'while the cat's away', etc.

lol

[malditako]

looks like ur getting answers now to all your questions...time to move on and find someone better who really deserves your love

[blackcatbone]

Gparry salamat po

[Terpe]

BCB, you have been subjected to a cruel and deliberate game.
Please try to remain positive (I know easier said than done)
There have been much sadder stories, but I know how much it hurts it so many ways.
Listen BCB, it can happen to anyone. Don't lose your positive attitude.
It could have been much worse.

[grahamw48]

True....could have been my ex.

[stevewool]

a new year a new start look at it that way and before you know it , smiles and happiness will be back in leaps and bounds, good luck

[Sim11UK]

I'm sorry things are the way they are yes stay on the forum...you know it makes sense.

[sars_notd_virus]

''A good man only deserves a good woman''...be happy thats its over,at least you are out of jane marie's quagmire!!

[dontpushme]

BCB, it sounds like you're on the mend. I'm glad you found the answers you were looking for. LOL, and sars is right. It's definitely a good thing you're past that mess.

Mick, I hope I never have to experience anything like you did, but if I do, then I hope I'm as resilient as you. LOL.

[blackcatbone]

thank you but i'm a long way from being on the mend it feels like someone has died to me but i have nobody to mourn

[joebloggs]

thank you but i'm a long way from being on the mend it feels like someone has died to me but i have nobody to mourn

as as you feel now blackcatbone time is a great healer, and in the following weeks and months the pain will fade

[mickcant]

Mick, I hope I never have to experience anything like you did, but if I do, then I hope I'm as resilient as you. LOL.

I suppose we have to acept what happens, if I could have gone back and changed things to make it work I would, but we have no time machine!
Thanks for your good thoughts.
Mick.