I am more worried now than i was !

[Norwichguy]

After reading some stories on here together with what i already experienced with a couple of friends in the past,the whole idea of going for a Filipina is worrying the hell out of me! Be carefull of this,be carefull of that and this,that and the other makes for sad reading.
I have had a couple of friends over the years marry a Filipina woman and they both only lasted 3 years. Having looked into this a bit more i have since spoke to 6 other men who's marrige lasted no more than 3 years. Whatever happened to the 7 year itch?
Obviously some of you guys on here have been very lucky or chosen well for which i wish you all the happiness in the world !
Im gradually getting myself back on my feet mentaly and finacially after a divorce 2 years ago. Im just so worried of blowing or waisting what i do have ( which isnt much ) for a doomed relationship. Any advice would be greatfully apreciated.

Jon

[stevewool]

hi there Jon and welcome to the forum, well lots of advice will be swinging its way to you soon , but we are all differant and what suits one may not suit another, whay are you intrested in a fillipina ?? i have only been married a few months to emma and my life is 100% better then i could ever imagine, like you i had my doubts and you do listern to what happens to others also, but all i can say is be truefull to yourself and to your parther, allways say what is on your mind and do not rush in , be real in what you are wanting and remember your age and dont let your manhood rule your brain

[nigel]

Relax mate!
"It aint known until shown!"
I get terrible apprensive feelings like you do! We convince ourselves that it's all going to go terribly wrong! If things go wrong you will deal with it much more confidently and effectively than you are imagining right now! Chillax dude!

[joebloggs]

your only hearing the bad news, looking on here over the years, there are not that many who come back and post thier marriage has ended in divorce, more realised they've been scammed than divorce...

if your already worried about it not working out, you're already building your marriage on dodgy foundations , and if you worried about things not working out, you would never do anytihng, life is taking risks, and those who dont have problems are those who are 6ft under

i've been married more than 7yrs, no talk of divorce yet

[Norwichguy]

Hi Steve,ive always been interested in filipinas ever since my mum told me at the age of 16 all about them. I should have listened to her and gone to the phills then,but hey alcohol,clubs and one night stands were more important then. I went out with a Thai lady for a while,extremely beautifull but her favourite two words were 'money' and 'more'!

[stevewool]

well thats a thai lady to which i dont really know, all i know is emma has never asked for any and emma is indeed beautifull too

[Terpe]

After reading some stories on here together with what i already experienced with a couple of friends in the past,the whole idea of going for a Filipina is worrying the hell out of me! Be carefull of this,be carefull of that and this,that and the other makes for sad reading.
I have had a couple of friends over the years marry a Filipina woman and they both only lasted 3 years. Having looked into this a bit more i have since spoke to 6 other men who's marrige lasted no more than 3 years. Whatever happened to the 7 year itch?
Obviously some of you guys on here have been very lucky or chosen well for which i wish you all the happiness in the world !
Im gradually getting myself back on my feet mentaly and finacially after a divorce 2 years ago. Im just so worried of blowing or waisting what i do have ( which isnt much ) for a doomed relationship. Any advice would be greatfully apreciated.

Jon

Jon, follow your head and your heart.
I have no idea why you would be so intent to find a Phils lady one moment, then suddenly get put off the idea the next moment. Look to yourself for that.
Maybe you would be better advised to look closer to home for your ideal soulmate, where it's much safer.
Take care.

[imagine]

After reading some stories on here together with what i already experienced with a couple of friends in the past,the whole idea of going for a Filipina is worrying the hell out of me! Be carefull of this,be carefull of that and this,that and the other makes for sad reading.
I have had a couple of friends over the years marry a Filipina woman and they both only lasted 3 years. Having looked into this a bit more i have since spoke to 6 other men who's marrige lasted no more than 3 years. Whatever happened to the 7 year itch?
Obviously some of you guys on here have been very lucky or chosen well for which i wish you all the happiness in the world !
Im gradually getting myself back on my feet mentaly and finacially after a divorce 2 years ago. Im just so worried of blowing or waisting what i do have ( which isnt much ) for a doomed relationship. Any advice would be greatfully apreciated.

Jon

if you could read about all the failed and bad marrages with uk women , perhaps there are more failures and plenty of engish women willing to take your money and all you got, just choose carefully,take your time,look at the heart and personality of the lady ,not her looks
if they ask for money , listen to your alarm bells, and remember there is good and bad all over the world,take it easy , take your time,

[Norwichguy]

Thanks for the advice guys. Im not gonna give up,just be more carefull i think!

[gWaPito]

I expect it was the visa

A while back your Filipina wife could get her ILR after 3 years.

Don't worry, just read and heed the advice of the experienced.

Don't be put off, there's risk in every relationship.

We got friends that are Brit phil couples where I live. They been together 16, 18 and 27 years.

My sister's brother in law been with his Filipina wife since 84.

They about to retire and go live The Philippines.

There 2 grown kids will stay here in UK.

2 beautiful kids at that, you wouldn't of thought they had such a damn ugly father.

They are like any other woman except, more easily to please.

Just keep your wits about you, same for any new relationship.

Good luck and keep us posted

[Ako Si Jamie]

I don't know why some of you single blokes on here looking for a Filipina go over to the Phils in a group.

Like a lads holiday but looking for a long term partner.

[Arthur Little]

Im not gonna give up,just be more carefull i think!

... that's the spirit!

[Arthur Little]

I don't know why some of you single blokes on here looking for a Filipina * go over to the Phils in a group.

... methinks you intended another "don't" to be inserted where I've marked it with an astreisk, Jamie ... ...

[Arthur Little]

A while back your Filipina wife could get her ILR after 3 years.

Now it's 2 years ... even better in that respect!

[Ako Si Jamie]

... methinks you intended another "don't" to be inserted where I've marked it with an astreisk, Jamie ... ...

You're right Arthur!

[Arthur Little]

They are like any other woman except, more easily to please.

... so the odds are stacked heavily in favour of Filipino women.

[joebloggs]

Now it's 2 years ... even better in that respect!

my stepson got ilr after being just 3 months in the uk

[Arthur Little]

Don't worry, just read and heed the advice of the experienced.

Don't be put off, there's risk in every relationship.

We got friends that are Brit phil couples where I live. They been together 16, 18 and 27 years.

My sister's brother in law been with his Filipina wife since 84.

They about to retire and go live The Philippines.

Just keep your wits about you, same for any new relationship.

Good luck and keep us posted

So there you go, Jon ... plenty of good advice from those who've "been there"; I hope it's made you feel better about the whole concept!

[Dedworth]

Thanks for the advice guys. Im not gonna give up,just be more carefull i think!

Remember "if you don't ask you don't get"

[febmary]

It takes a lot of time to get to know a person. And if you want to have serious commitment, you must consider things. As they said it takes two to tango!

[ampy]

Sorry to hear loads of off putting things about filipina,for some reason all the brits and filipina i ever known is been married for long time, i am for example was married to my late husband from 1992-2007 but he died in cancer,very much in love than we first met each other,we did had lots of trials came in to our marriage,but it was only the cancer that separated us,
And all of frnds have been married for ages too,
but we can never tell how once relationship will end up,life is full of surprices,,,good luck to you !!!,see what is in there for you! dont rush it !good luck !

[laurel]

Hi Norwichguy,
one thing that may be affecting you is that you are still dealing with the fallout mentally etc of your divorce...................2yrs you say??, well im divorced , and it does affect you greatly.....I wouldnt be in any rush to determine that you HAVE to marry anybody of a certain creed/colour.

Speaking for myself I found it was thinking desperate things....im gonna be left on the shelf etc etc, and it can be distressing.
Then out of the blue I met my now wife..and believe me there were many challenges ahead, but I knew she was the one for me and we stuck it out.

Dont be in a rush , dont panic..............enjoy being able to pick and choose.............and before long , who knows whats around the corner for you??

Good luck .....and thanks for being very open with your thoughts.
Many have been there, and lived to tell the tale

[worthingmale]

take your time, dont rush into anything.

If it is the person you are ment to spend the rest of your life with, whats wrong with waiting that little bit longer to get to knwo them

[sars_notd_virus]

Always believe in the love destiny...,two people are meant to be together,you just have to wait for the right time and the right place.

[grahamw48]

Mine lasted 12 years...til the rot set in.

Just as much my fault, it ending.

My only regret is that I didn't work harder at the relationship.

You must take into consideration the personalities and circumstances of BOTH partners in these relationships. We're all human and we're all different.

I would do it all again. Whether I've got the energy now is another matter.

[somebody]

First of all John think why does your woman need to be from Phill? I never intended my Wife to be phill to be honest marriage was the last thing on my mind the night (after beatingSpurs beating Liverpool 2-1 i think it was) to anyone let alone to a woman from a far off land.

But if your mind is made up learn the culture and learn to spot the signs a lady is the type for marriage of course you can never say two people will gel but...

I would also work out what is needed with regards the visa and as much about the genral rules as you can.
Be prepared to work as a detective many marriages seem to have a problem as the pinay wife didn't want to mention all the possible people dependent on her!
Even my wife was scared to mention she had a Bro and a sis who were to a degree dependent on her. I have basically come their father having to make decisions on there future and sponsor them. Luckily im able to help and they are good kids who realise what they have to do and work hard.

Think also about how you will communicate, my wife was well educated in phill and then studied hard before and just after arriving to speak English now 5-6 years on phills and brits all think she is a brit born phill kid. Some people will not be so forunate and the language difficulties will be hard.

Are you prepared to learn and listen tagalog? Its not easy to learn a 2nd language from scratch when older and also I know some brits cant deal with being in a room where tagalog is being spoken. Me it doesn't bother me and im amazed how much often I understand in a room full of spoken tagalog.

Also are you prepared to spend time shopping for bablikyan boxes and finding the right dried fish or some sauce? Can you deal with tagalog foods and possible weird to brits food combos?

Can you be ready to find your not always the person she worries about the most at a certain moment in time? As my wife says she loves me to bits but she knows i can look after myself but her little bro and sis plus certain other family members can't. Can be tough sometimes but it shows what a loving lady she is but not all would see it that way

Lots of challanges but one thing i have learned is my wife is special

[JimOttley]

Very balanced viewpoint Andy

Are you prepared to learn and listen tagalog? Its not easy to learn a 2nd language from scratch when older and also I know some brits cant deal with being in a room where tagalog is being spoken. Me it doesn't bother me and im amazed how much often I understand in a room full of spoken tagalog.

Serioulsy? Why could they not deal with it?

I don't always understand what's being said but then I'm only good at computer languages but it does not bother me to be there and not be understanding, I do pick up quite a lot but I really need to learn more.

[Tawi2]

First of all John think why does your woman need to be from Phill?

Good questionI never understood the fixation with any particular ethnicity,women are women are women,especially from guys with no connection whatsoever to a particular country,still puzzles me when a guy suddenly wants a woman from Thailand,pinas,azerbaijan or wherever when the woman their soulmate could be living streets away but is overlooked