Hi Sad Butterfly ....... well, I've worked out who you are as your postings have given it away but I respect your anonymity. Just wondering why you are feeling so sad?
Hi there Rosie,i am not good of hiding at all really, i am so sad because i starting to doubt my own husbands feeling for me and his real intention, i am just worried he might read this or he might be one of you as he knows i like going to this forum, i just know sharing and seeking an advise from this forum could help me a lot and give me better understanding of why he is being so difficult or he just dont realized he is doing it.
i will give you one example, of why i thought of this,
He has a house with the mortgage of £160 , what he payed so far was 40 grand , he wanted to sell his house and give 40 grand to his daughter as his early inheritance so he dont have to worry i guessed when he died,but the house can not sell because of the recession, i have told him that i can give him 40 grand to give to his child and we can keep the house and have its rent to pay for itself and after 10 yrs it will all be paid and we can sell it.
He thought it is a good idea,it will solve his daughters financial need, will help me invest my money , and we get to keep the house,i thought to myself,,,blimey,,,,fisrt time he agree to what i said as he never done that ever !!!
The catch is,,he said to me, ok honey,,that is good idea,and in 10 years my darling you get to double your 40 grand and i get to have my 100 grand back,!!!! that is really nice !!!, my £ 100
i thought it is supposed to be for us , not his only or mine,,,,so i ask him,,, why only yours? i thought i have bought it from you and the rental money have payed for itself, he said that it is on his mortgage and on his name and without his name i can never have it anyway.
So now i am confused as he always said i am stupid and greedy for money, so now i am starting to doubt myself,,,maybe i am really greedy or maybe i dont really understand the situation and really am stupid.
Because of this thought i decided not to get involve anymore as i am starting to doubt my own ability to decide, with everything,I dont mean to be greedy ,its just maybe of all the things happening between us i dont always feel i get a fair deal.i have 2 young kids to think about too, so please let me know, if i am being greedy,selfish and a wife from hell , but most of all i do need your advise so i can put the wrong things i am doing .
Part 2
I bought a house in the uk, i pay my own mortagage monthly , electric, me and kids clothing and allowance,some groceries and i pay for the house maintenance, and he is paying for the rest ,like food ,heater, water,council tax and all the things needed paying.everything is ok until it comes to ,,,'' last will and testament '' he wanted me to give 15 % of the house so that if he is to die first he wanted it to be given to his children,,,i thought it is not good me losing my husband and losing 15% of my own house as he already given his own house and his own saving to his children,i never get anything from it,which i dont mind,but taking what i thought is mine is kind a difficult to accept,so now i am really greedy as he pays the bills he claims ,he should have half of it but in case he ask only for 15%
I do love him and as he always said to me,money is the route of all evil i am thinking why i have so much evil in my mind?i still give him 15 % but i just thought it is not right as i wanted it all go to my kids as it is their late dads money that payed for the house anyway.
I would like to an honest advise so i can get on with my life and i can be a better mother and a good wife,thanks again for taking time reading this.
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