i want my girl with me soon

[matt.matt]

Hi all i am a newbie and have learned a lot from this site
my goal is to bring my filipna sweetheart to uk
i have been chatting to her via cam for 9 months and after doing some research realise its not so easy
i am a hands on guy aged 50 but paperwork head knowledge is a strain
work with hands not brain
she was due to come over here and after i did research found it was not so simple am now going to write to her often and plan to visit in july this year
any advice or help would be appreciated
also because me being a man am not so organised is there anyone or organisation that can take control of a simple entry without taxing my brain
thank you so far for all i have read on this site
Matt

[Walaytawo]

Hi Matt, I wouldn't tax your brain too much until you've actually met in person. Enjoy that time together then make plans from there. just my advice

[matt.matt]

thank you for reply and do plan to go there in july
any help is good help so nervous but will deal with it because i know it is my route to happiness

[les_taxi]

Hi Matt just concentrate on meeting her first as Walaytawo says,then if all goes well take it from there.
This is just the begining

[les_taxi]

thank you for reply and do plan to go there in july
any help is good help so nervous but will deal with it because i know it is my route to happiness

As it gets nearer the nerves kick in a bit, but once you have done it and are sitting on that plane you know you are commited and from experience it will be better than you imagine and you will become s stronger person from it too.

[matt.matt]

Hello Les
think you know a lot so would like to keep in touch
email sales@sportingglassfibre.com
i will move mountains to be with this girl
i love her to bits and by reading these forums has helped me so much
i do understand to write and to visit
but a professional would maybe suit me better
any advice is welcome to me
Matt

[stevewool]

hi there matt, you are not alone, we all have been there and many many of us are so happy, yes there is heartache but stick with it and life becomes fantastic, take it one thing at a time

[grahamw48]

Hi Matt.

As others have said, just look forward to the visit first.

I also recommend that you do plenty of reading up on the Phils and their way of life too, so when you get there you'll feel a bit more comfortable with the place and enjoy your stay more.
If you're not prepared it can be a bit of a shock to the system.

Have a look in your local library and get hold of the Philippines 'Lonely Planet' guide.
Good bedtime reading.

Don't worry too much about paperwork etc at this stage, there'll be lots of help and advice on this forum when you need it.

Make certain that she is going to be the RIGHT lady for you though....as much as that is possible.

What you do need to be doing is keeping all records of your correspondence with the lady, and pictures of you together in the Phils. That will help with any future visa application.

Keep your bank account in the black and try to stay in the same job and address.

The Phils is a brilliant place for a holiday, but pace yourself, particularly in the first few days, when you will be jet-lagged.

Good luck anyway.

[Terpe]

Hi Matt, welcome here.

All sound advice for your first steps.

Which part of Philippines will you be heading to?

[philphil61]

Hi Matt

I have to agree with most posts here but I think they are trying to say something without being to direct - yes I have been hurt and still suffering but I do not skip my responsibilities and consider my honesty to be painful to some.

They say take your time, enjoy a trip first, make sure she is right for you - it's a warning Matt - there are some very lucky men on here and in the outside world that are very happily in a relationship/marriage with a pinoy but there are as many (or maybe more) sad stories of men being fleeced/tricked/lied to even after years of chatting.

I am not saying all pinoy (as I mentioned above) but take the warnings as meaning something - no one wants you to suffer - we only want you to be happy yet safe.

I hope it all goes well for you.

[Arthur Little]

All good, sound advice, Matt ... to the friendly online filipino/uk community.

[Lancashirelad]

Hi

Enjoy your trip, remember to gather evidence as you go.
If you decide to apply for a visa later you will need to show proof of relationship. So get lots photos of you both together and with her family if u can. Keep your chat logs and emails,letters or cards, receipts. Anything which can help prove you are in contact and have met!
Philippines is very different from here! if you get chance have a read of my first trip to phils here> http://filipinaroses.com/showthread....-trip-to-Phils....
have a great time!

[matt.matt]

Wow i am so glad i did a little research and it brought me to this site
such genuine and friendly people thank you for the replies
i will be going late july only for a few days and will really try to get to know this girl in the flesh face to face she is in her 40s i have just turned 50 she is christian and i have every faith she is for real the place i will be going is malanday marakina and yes i am now aware to keep all evidence
one other question that has not been answered is there an agency that can help this go smoothly when the time comes
best wishes to every one

[les_taxi]

Noyou don't need an agency.All the help you need is on this Forum
Remember this will be your first meet just see how it goes I'm sure it will be great.
You only say your going for a few days? Can you not extend this a few days is not enough.
Most of us tend to go for at least two weeks-it's a long way and expensive flight.
Whatever you do don't worry too much,I'm sure we were all nervous our first meet but I'm sure all on here would say it was totally worth it.

[Walaytawo]

i will be going late july only for a few days and will really try to get to know this girl in the flesh face to face

You may want to take into consideration her family also. I'm sure they'll be at least one or two wanting to meet you. I once thought I was going for a romantic trip for 2 to the beach, and we ended up picking up 15 more family members along the way. Can cost a small fortune if you're not careful Just a word to wise, as sweet as your gf may be doesn't always mean the rest of the family won't see you as a free ATM.

[philphil61]

lol at "You may want to take into consideration her family also"

her mother, father, all her uncles and aunts, her sis's and bro's and all their children and anyone else connected to the family plus good friends and local "business associates" all will be considered for days out, trips, shopping and providing food and drinks

not all are like this - again this is worst scenario......
you will be asked to invite them to a few trips to show you have money and status and willing to provide for "the family"

for the pinoy - it's a freebie / chance to eat, drink and karaoke and it's a status aspect - that they can show to others they have a foreign connection

for you - it's a test on your financial status and if you will fit in!

[somebody]

Yep very true about the family n all..
On our last trip over all the cousins woulld pile over to the aunts house we were staying at not because they are greedy or anything bad. Firstly they wanted to see my wife who they rarely see and me as we all chat on fb n skype. But also life in phill can be dull n boring, as for many its rare for most to go on trips or do things different to the norm.

[grahamw48]

Use your own judgement and common sense...BUT:

Family trips need not cost a fortune, in fact peanuts to us.

I've had some brilliant times taking a hoard of family and friends to isolated beaches on rented bancas.

Barbeque, swimming, booze and partying = lots of great memories for everyone, and bonding with the family and locals.

I've been divorced for 5 years now, but there is no animosity whatever towards me from those lovely people, and lots of them are Facebook friends.

All in all the Filipino people have given far more to me than I have given to them.

.

[Walaytawo]

Nice pic Got a few like that. I realize my comments may have seemed a tad negative. it all depends on your perspective and finances. I'm just a bit more kuripot these days than when I first started coming here I think I still see it from a western standpoint that if a date brought the whole family to a restaurant I wouldn't be best pleased.

[grahamw48]

Haha.

I've never been one to waste a penny...then and now.

Out in the province, as you'll know, not a lot has to be spent to have a great time. Often just a willingness to join in.

I prefer the simple life anyway. It amuses the locals, but at the same time I think they respect you for not being snobbish or a 'weak' Kano.
.
.

[somebody]

Yeah just keep the tastes inexpensive and your be ok

[scott&ligaya]

I prefer the simple life anyway. It amuses the locals, but at the same time I think they respect you for not being snobbish or a 'weak' Kano.
.

That is so true, learning to play tongit, drink the odd gin and a few beers along with some pikka pikka food and you will be well in with the locals
.

[somebody]

I prefer the simple life anyway. It amuses the locals, but at the same time I think they respect you for not being snobbish or a 'weak' Kano.
.

That is so true, learning to play tongit, drink the odd gin and a few beers along with some pikka pikka food and you will be well in with the locals
.

So true our Phill relatives are always worried when we just chilling round the table of an evening outside the house that Phill life is to dull especially now with facebook and them seeing a glimspe of how busy and hertic our lives in London are. No folks its just perfect here

[matt.matt]

replies all welcome
did disturb me on some off the reading but tonight talked and explained to my girl i am so quiet and this is not acceptable to me she is very understanding and do believe it will be me and Grace thats her name but will do the right thing and ask her parents for her hand in marriage
yes i am so nervous but i believe Grace is the girl for me and is worth the trip
time is precious to me i have to boys living with me so will have to make arrangements for them too
but i cant wait til i have my women wrapped up here safe with me
Matt

[Lorna]

Hi Matt, I am Lorna from Philippines now living in Bristol for 3 years with my husband. Still very happy with each other.
Go to the Philippines and meet your girl and be very observant on how things go. Yes there are many bad stories about Brits being used and tricked. But If she really love you, she will do her best to keep you happy and safe from any bad intentions.
Good luck! Tell us about the trip. All the best

[Walaytawo]

Nice to see Gazza looking well again

[Ako Si Jamie]

Nice pic Got a few like that. I realize my comments may have seemed a tad negative. it all depends on your perspective and finances. I'm just a bit more kuripot these days than when I first started coming here I think I still see it from a western standpoint that if a date brought the whole family to a restaurant I wouldn't be best pleased.

.....and that's before you get landed with the bill at the end of the night

replies all welcome
did disturb me on some off the reading but tonight talked and explained to my girl i am so quiet and this is not acceptable to me she is very understanding and do believe it will be me and Grace thats her name but will do the right thing and ask her parents for her hand in marriage
yes i am so nervous but i believe Grace is the girl for me and is worth the trip
time is precious to me i have to boys living with me so will have to make arrangements for them too
but i cant wait til i have my women wrapped up here safe with me
Matt

Believe it or not I'm quiet & shy amongst a group of strangers but I was totally at ease when I was around Maria's family. I was met at the airport by the whole clan and it didn't bother me even though I thought I was being met by two or three family members. Filipino's are different to Westerners and you won't be made to feel like an outsider or inferior.

Like you I believed Maria was the girl for me even before I met her and nothing changed after that. Even though she's 7,000 miles away now I feel like I'm already married too her That might sound a bit heavy to some men but I look at it positively and try to understand it from her point of view and realise that Filipina's are different to their western counterparts where relationships are concerned.

Even though you've got good vibes about your woman try not to get emotionally carried away just yet. She could turn out to be a bad apple and if she is, she'll play on those emotions and it could end in tears. When you return to the UK don't rush into anything even if things went well. She could change, she could start asking for money etc. Give it some time and then if you feel comfortable and confident about her and you're sure she wants you for the right reasons then you should be onto a winner!

Nice to see Gazza looking well again

I wondered what you were going about first then I realised. Does look like him

[philphil61]

Even though you've got good vibes about your woman try not to get emotionally carried away just yet. She could turn out to be a bad apple and if she is, she'll play on those emotions and it could end in tears. When you return to the UK don't rush into anything even if things went well. She could change, she could start asking for money etc. Give it some time and then if you feel comfortable and confident about her and you're sure she wants you for the right reasons then you should be onto a winner!

good solid sound advice......

[alfarman]

i am a filipina who's living in holme on spalding moor at the moment,me and my husband met last 2006,i tried for a visit visa for a couple of times and unfortunately failed 2x,but granted on my 3rd early last year for a 6 mnths visit visa and for 2yrs now as my husband sponsored me..we got married in the phil...loads of hussles but everything will be fine you just need to help each other..believe me love conquer .

Hi all i am a newbie and have learned a lot from this site
my goal is to bring my filipna sweetheart to uk
i have been chatting to her via cam for 9 months and after doing some research realise its not so easy
i am a hands on guy aged 50 but paperwork head knowledge is a strain
work with hands not brain
she was due to come over here and after i did research found it was not so simple am now going to write to her often and plan to visit in july this year
any advice or help would be appreciated
also because me being a man am not so organised is there anyone or organisation that can take control of a simple entry without taxing my brain
thank you so far for all i have read on this site
Matt

[grahamw48]

Hi.

Glad everything worked out for you.

I live in York, and I know your little village well.