Quote Originally Posted by Maria B View Post
Filipina's are very emotional if they had a very bad trauma. She is lucky to have a concerned friend (boyfriend) like you. Year 2008, Filipino fiancées and spouses of foreign citizens who are leaving the country are required to attend the Commission on Filipinos Overseas (CFO) guidance and counseling programs in order to secure the Guidance and Counseling Certificate (GCC) and the CFO sticker. This Pre-Departure Orientation Seminar (P.D.O.S) is a pre-requisite to the issuance of passports. THIS PROGRAM HELPS Filipino fiancées and spouses of foreign nationals make informed decisions regarding their marriage to foreign nationals and to prepare them for their adjustments in cross-cultural marriages. The two-hour seminar include topics about migration laws, welfare and support services available in their country of destination, their rights overseas; and tips on how to cope up if in case there’ll be problematic or difficult domestic situations.
WE are given books, leaflets of website where to contact if in case we encountered things like that of what u mentioned. TALK to her about this. She may contact the helpful filipino links from the list, she can find a lot of filipinos who are a member of a Filipino community where she can find help like solicitors & advisers.
It's hard to judge her as I've seen the unbelievable true to life stories from the seminar of how Filipina wives are being treated. It's scary and distressful. There's one wife who was treated like a prisoner and a sex slave & a lot of stories never been told in the public.
If she is unhappy, she should give any close Filipina friend a shout that she needs help & I'm sure she can find one. A year is quiet long for her to suffer. Hope she keeps a diary of how she was treated or some evidence.
Hope she can find help about this matter.
Update. It seems I have opened rather a diverse can of worms here. I thank you all for your comments but especially those who do not instantly draw the conclusion that I am some ''rouge'' trying to steal another mans wife, or that the lady is simply ''playing'' the field. Having spent a little time exploring this very imformative site (where the immediate assumption is that if an English guy has any form of communication with a Filipino girl it is for relationship purpose or marriage) I can fully understand the comments from members suggesting this.But I have to tell you this is not the case in this situation. Remember I met the lady in question socially (not via any dating website or format). At the time I met her I was totally unaware of her situation,.. so yes then I could have considered a possible relationship. Under the present circumstances there is no intention of any form of relationship from either side other than concerned friendship. So I am not attempting to steal another mans wife nor Is the lady attempting to ''hustle'' me in some way,as has been suggested. The lady came to the uk having been convinced by the promises of her now husband of a better life for her and her children. What she has told me is the truth and she has evidence of police intervention ( the first only four days after her marriage). Untill very recently (when she started attending the local catholic church and met other filipino people) she had been kept a virtual prisoner due to her lack of knowledge of the uk and our procedures. She has to work very long hours to support herself and her two children with no finacial aid from her ''husband''. He only provides her with a place to live in return (now) for domestic services. Previously (and I do not know how to phrase this) it had been suggested that ''other sexually related services'' would be expected. Not with her husband however but with the husbands grown son who only four days after her ''marriage'' attempted to contrive her into a physical relationship with him.
This threat has however been removed.
She has proof that whilst refusing to give her and her children any financial support, her ''husband'' is sending money to three other females from the Filipenes that he contacted via one of the many websites.
He openly chats to these females in her presence via yahoo and seems to obtain some sort of weird pleasure from the distress he causes her by doing this. He constantly threatens her both physically and emotionally in an attempt to control her. The latest threat being that if she does not continue to comply he will issue divorce proceedings against her ( not sure wht grounds he could use though) and instantly get the home office to deport her and her two children whilst he visits one of his new ladies in the filipenes to persue marriage to her. Her only wish at the moment is to be able to remain in the uk for the sake of her childrens future and it seem she is prepared to undergo any unhappiness herself to achive this (she is afraid to take any actual legal action against her husband for fear she will not be belived) as the alternative is for her and her children to be sent back to the filipenes, where she has nothing. She even sold belongings, clothes, etc two days prior to her departure from the filipenes to help raise money to assist her husband with costs. I am very concerned for her and as a British citizen ( just a normal guy, not some devious rouge) I am ashamed that such a situation exists in the Uk today. I have told her to seek help from the C A B but she has no confidence to do anything as her ''husband'' has convinced her that most of what she tells them would be ignored as she is simply a Filipino wife, a foreigner, who's accusations against him as a uk citizen would be ignored. I wonder how many other innocent Women from the filipenes are undergoing simialr circumstances maybe many . Surley there is some means for her to escape this without the risk of being deported. I await further insight. Thank you